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(Stuff.co.nz)   How would you respond if your eight year-old daughter said she wanted to grow a penis?   (stuff.co.nz) divider line 116
    More: Interesting, gender identity disorder, Tonka, gender reassignment  
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6790 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Mar 2014 at 6:24 AM (37 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



116 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-03-10 05:21:49 AM  
"If you keep yourself clean and healthy, you can have all the penises you want when you get bigger."
 
2014-03-10 05:41:43 AM  
Well honey, it's impossible now, but other animals can do it. Here's a book on them. Here's another book on molecular biology. And here's some periodicals and a lab coat.

Also your father wants regeneration.
 
2014-03-10 06:27:20 AM  
We'll sweety, you can't grow them in a pot like that marigold I helped you grow. Have some sea monkeys.
 
2014-03-10 06:28:52 AM  
give her a jar. and some dirt.
 
2014-03-10 06:29:18 AM  
i0.kym-cdn.com
 
2014-03-10 06:38:31 AM  
Is this the thread about female bodybuilding?
 
2014-03-10 06:41:08 AM  

Agarista: give her a jar. and some dirt.


and what? Penis seeds?
 
2014-03-10 06:47:05 AM  
Have a discussion about physical gender, and stereotypical gender roles and see how she feels about that.
 
2014-03-10 06:50:45 AM  
"You can make a penis grow by putting it in your mouth."
 
2014-03-10 06:51:30 AM  
There ought to be a book called 'How catering to every whim and fancy will ruin your kid'.
 
2014-03-10 06:51:40 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: "If you keep yourself clean and healthy, you can have all the penises you want when you get bigger."


One and done

well.. .clean, healthy, pretty, nice and complaint.
 
2014-03-10 06:51:49 AM  
I was driving along in the car recently when my daughter, Ruby*, asked if she could go to the doctor's and get a penis. She's eight. My breath caught in my throat, and without taking my eyes off the road, I said I'd have to Google it when I got home.

Sure... Any excuse to let you Google "penis" again...
 
2014-03-10 06:52:06 AM  

doglover: Well honey, it's impossible now, but other animals can do it. Here's a book on them. Here's another book on molecular biology. And here's some periodicals and a lab coat.

Also your father wants regeneration.


You. You are awesome.
 
2014-03-10 06:54:06 AM  
For starters, I wouldn't publish details about the situation for all the world to see.
 
2014-03-10 06:57:49 AM  

spiritplumber: doglover: Well honey, it's impossible now, but other animals can do it. Here's a book on them. Here's another book on molecular biology. And here's some periodicals and a lab coat.

Also your father wants regeneration.

You. You are awesome.


If you can't find immortality through your daughter, you can at least set her to work on the philosopher's stones.
 
2014-03-10 06:58:11 AM  

spamdog: Agarista: give her a jar. and some dirt.

and what? Penis seeds?


no. Just let her figure out that's NOT how to grow a penis.
 
2014-03-10 07:01:37 AM  
Tell her to stay off /d/ that is daddy's special site.
 
2014-03-10 07:03:33 AM  
I would tell her girls can't grow penises and that if she was hell-bent on seeing one, she could wait until she was older and some guy would gladly show her his.
 
2014-03-10 07:04:48 AM  
Tell her to stop dressing so sexy, she's 8.
 
2014-03-10 07:08:44 AM  

spamdog: Agarista: give her a jar. and some dirt.

and what? Penis seeds?


Penises spill seed all the time. It shouldn't be hard to find any.
 
2014-03-10 07:09:21 AM  
photos.geni.com

"grow a penis" is an anagram for "Spiro Agnew"
 
2014-03-10 07:10:59 AM  
How would I respond?  I sure as hell wouldn't start attention-wh0ring on the internet about it.

/"Well honey, we can't do anything about it now.  How about playing softball this spring? "
//"Well honey, we could look at Corvettes, really big watches, and .44 magnum handguns.  That is usually pretty close."
 
2014-03-10 07:14:44 AM  
That woman has a hairy chest. The chances of her daughter growing a penis suddenly seem likely.
 
2014-03-10 07:16:26 AM  

bearded clamorer: "grow a penis" is an anagram for "Spiro Agnew"


^ Win.
 
2014-03-10 07:17:45 AM  
dnrtfa but I'm sure that  'my first littoe strap on' or some such is available so the girl could just try it out in the safety of her own home.
 
2014-03-10 07:17:58 AM  
"quit being a dumbass and go outside and play"
 
2014-03-10 07:18:50 AM  
"In about ten years, you'll have a great place to put one."
 
2014-03-10 07:18:54 AM  
no, no, NO! not this thread again! stop greenlighting this crap, even if it's for real, no one cares, your an idiot, you've proven anything can procreate, and you created a farked-up kid. your whole family should die in a fire.
/on earth today, they still don't know what happened to that airliner.
 
2014-03-10 07:20:21 AM  
Oh great, a TG thread on Fark, sure to be a haven of compassion, sensitivity, and reason...

www.thehiredguns.com
 
2014-03-10 07:20:40 AM  
Ask her if she knows about shrinkage.
 
2014-03-10 07:24:48 AM  
estergoldberg.typepad.com

Can relate
 
2014-03-10 07:30:59 AM  
"At least she isn't dating a black guy"
 
2014-03-10 07:31:38 AM  

No Such Agency: Oh great, a TG thread on Fark, sure to be a haven of compassion, sensitivity, and reason...

[www.thehiredguns.com image 500x328]


There's some good trans farkers out there.

Doesn't mean I don't want salamander DNA.
 
2014-03-10 07:34:37 AM  
While it's expected that so many penis jokes have taken over this thread,  this is a real thing.  I've known people who go through it, and it can be rough.  From the article I think the 8 year old's school principal deserves an award for being proactive and teaching the mother about gender identity issues instead of judging the child or the parent in this case.

Assuming this whole article wasn't just a well written keyword article farming for a specific demographic or hoping to go viral on facebook.
 
2014-03-10 07:37:24 AM  
I think a lot of little girls say that they want a penis. I'm sorry, but I don't see how taking it seriously at age 8 can be anything but detrimental.
 
2014-03-10 07:39:51 AM  
"Great, you sure do take after your mother."
 
2014-03-10 07:42:20 AM  
"why?"
 
2014-03-10 07:46:21 AM  

rubi_con_man: AverageAmericanGuy: "If you keep yourself clean and healthy, you can have all the penises you want when you get bigger."

One and done

well.. .clean, healthy, pretty, nice and complaint.


...'compliant'?
 
2014-03-10 07:53:25 AM  
You'll only break it off again just like you did right after you were born.  And for the same reason, you do not want to grow a tail.  Breaky breaky.
 
2014-03-10 07:53:51 AM  

Muta: "You can make a penis grow by putting it in your mouth."


Thread.
 
2014-03-10 07:58:10 AM  

Muta: "You can make a penis grow by putting it in your mouth."


2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-03-10 07:58:26 AM  
Umm, she's 8.  Kid's understanding of race, gender and the rest are still developing- 7 to 8 year olds are still working on understanding that these things are permanent.[1]  How about letting her dress the way she wants and skateboard with the boys if it makes her happy and not stressing about it too much.

If she's still feeling like that at 12-14, then you might need some more help

[1] My then 7-year old once happily told me he didn't have to worry about the n-word because he wasn't black.  When I tried to explain that yes, he was half black he told me he was brown and that I was black since I was wearing black clothes.
 
2014-03-10 07:58:27 AM  
Everyone deserves a penis.

/obscure?
 
2014-03-10 07:59:12 AM  

TheOther: rubi_con_man: AverageAmericanGuy: "If you keep yourself clean and healthy, you can have all the penises you want when you get bigger."

One and done

well.. .clean, healthy, pretty, nice and complaint.

...'compliant'?


Yeah yeah yeah, see, boys do the chasing, and girls do the selecting. So the girl has to be "compliant" when the boy asks her to take it off.

/ Or just tap any male in the world on the shoulder, say, "Hi, wanna fark?" and enjoy and 89% success rate.
// Come to think of it, clean, pretty, healthy and nice aren't all that necessary for girl to make that strategy work, either.
 
2014-03-10 08:02:50 AM  
Yeah, but are you gonna take care of it? Those things require daily excercise, and usually you're on your own with that. And sometimes it just wakes up in the middle of the night and just stares at you, very creepy, you don't want that.
 
2014-03-10 08:05:11 AM  
"That's the spirit!"
 
2014-03-10 08:05:23 AM  
Sorry snowflake, only people in charge can have a penis.
 
2014-03-10 08:06:35 AM  

No Such Agency: Oh great, a TG thread on Fark, sure to be a haven of compassion, sensitivity, and reason...

[www.thehiredguns.com image 500x328]


When an 8-year-old girl says she wants to grow a penis it has nothing to do with guys getting their kink on.
 
2014-03-10 08:07:39 AM  

E5bie: TheOther: rubi_con_man: AverageAmericanGuy: "If you keep yourself clean and healthy, you can have all the penises you want when you get bigger."

One and done

well.. .clean, healthy, pretty, nice and complaint.

...'compliant'?

Yeah yeah yeah, see, boys do the chasing, and girls do the selecting. So the girl has to be "compliant" when the boy asks her to take it off.

/ Or just tap any male in the world on the shoulder, say, "Hi, wanna fark?" and enjoy and 89% success rate.
// Come to think of it, clean, pretty, healthy and nice aren't all that necessary for girl to make that strategy work, either.


Incidentally, this is also why gay men are so much more threatening than lesbians. Gay guys are farking 24/7, committing "crimes against nature" by hooking up with other horny dogs instead of the Frigid Princesses that God intended for all men, to teach them self-mortification. Lesbians are just cute because all they do is sit around together and eat ice cream on a Saturday night, as sexual purity is, after all, the natural state of all women.

/*sarcasm*
 
2014-03-10 08:10:37 AM  
"Me too, sweet pea."
 
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