Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(KCRG)   You know your blood-alcohol content is too high when a Breathalyzer can't calculate it. Give this guy an honorary FARK membership?   (kcrg.com) divider line 28
    More: Dumbass, Iowa City man, breathalyzers  
•       •       •

4476 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Mar 2014 at 8:44 AM (50 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



28 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-10 08:45:45 AM  
"Break the breathalyzer" achievement unlocked!
 
2014-03-10 08:46:53 AM  
Iowa City police said that's what happened early Friday morning when they gave a breath test to an Iowa City man that initially read .467 percent before reading "HI." 'TILT"
 
2014-03-10 08:48:44 AM  
I thought this story looked familiar, then I saw it was from January...

The hint was that he was talking to people who weren't there in his basement, and that he was too drunk to stand up after telling the cops he'd only had 2 beers... I'd have thought it would have to be 2 kegs of beer to get a .467...
 
2014-03-10 08:48:46 AM  
We had a local guy test .54

I know there have been higher ones, but at the time it was astonishing.

He was conscious and reasonably lucid.
 
2014-03-10 08:50:42 AM  
.467? That's Keith Whitley territory.
 
2014-03-10 08:51:01 AM  
"HI"....so did it wave at him like......

i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-10 08:57:37 AM  

John Buck 41: .467? That's Keith Whitley territory.


I was thinking Keith Richards or Keith Moon, but your Keith works as well.

/never naming a kid Keith.
 
2014-03-10 09:17:10 AM  
Damn, and this guy wasn't dead or in a coma and was still coherent enough to (sort of) operate a motor vehicle and still maxed out the device?  I'm going with faulty breathalyzer.
 
2014-03-10 09:33:47 AM  
Wonder if they took a blood test to see what his actual level was.
 
2014-03-10 09:34:11 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-03-10 09:41:07 AM  
That's my bac before I have 'breakfast.'
 
2014-03-10 09:42:50 AM  
Here's what's left of the breathalyzer he blew into.

www.dallasartsrevue.com
 
2014-03-10 10:48:22 AM  
He should get a lawyer.   Clearly the breathalyzer is defective.
 
2014-03-10 11:49:51 AM  

ChipNASA: "HI"....so did it wave at him like......

[i.imgur.com image 600x359]


Exactly my thoughts, the machine was just trying to communicate and be cordial.
 
2014-03-10 12:05:14 PM  
Just think of the truly epic hangover he's going to have to go through -- probably in an unforgiving and uncaring prison cell.
 
2014-03-10 12:15:58 PM  
There is some sort of logic between breath alcohol content and blood content, seems like the gaseous levels wouldn't necessarily correspond to the aqueous levels.
 
2014-03-10 12:42:05 PM  

Stinkyy: ChipNASA: "HI"....so did it wave at him like......

[i.imgur.com image 600x359]

Exactly my thoughts, the machine was just trying to communicate and be cordial.


"Hi there! This is Eddie, your shipboard computer, and I'm feeling just great, guys, and I know I'm just going to get a bundle of kicks out of any program you care to run through me."

/HHGTTGFTW
 
2014-03-10 01:03:16 PM  
How does one get to a .467 on beer?

Is he 6?
 
2014-03-10 01:12:43 PM  
I'd puke before I could ever get that high.
 
2014-03-10 02:14:59 PM  
Once I was taken to the drunk tank after I embarked on a very long stroll in the wrong direction and decided to sleep on someone's doorstep.

The nurses @ the tank asked for a new unit after they tried to test me several times....

Nurses: "Someone bring me a new one this one needs calibrated"

*nurse unwraps newly calibrated device*

Nurse: "Ok, now blow into this one"

*both nurses look astonished*

Nurse: "Never mind how are you talking to us so coherently, how are you even standing?"

Me: "Hi one huh?"

Nurse: ".42"

/I had a problem
//Just missed the tilt function I guess
 
2014-03-10 02:56:01 PM  
Make a breathalyser read 'HI'?  I've unlocked that achievement.
 
2014-03-10 04:17:08 PM  
img.fark.net

He has become the liquor.
 
2014-03-10 04:46:18 PM  
I'm calling BS on this one. The body starts shutting down around .40, so doubt this guy would be walking around, much less driving.
 
2014-03-10 05:37:54 PM  
I work in a medical/surgical ICU in Wisconsin, so I have seen some impressive BACs.  The highest I remember seeing was 0.69.  Hard core alcoholics play by a different set of rules.
 
2014-03-10 06:47:26 PM  
I'm sorry sir, your BAC is "BUFFER OVERFLOW", so we're going to have to arrest you
 
2014-03-10 06:59:14 PM  
When I was young and dumb and in the military, I downed a fifth of Jack in under 10 minutes. It was 8 hours before the machine in the base hospital lab could accurately read my BAC. If it hadn't been for my body size and good health, I would be dead.

/Almost got 5 years in the federal pen for that one.
 
2014-03-10 09:14:33 PM  

2KanZam: Once I was taken to the drunk tank after I embarked on a very long stroll in the wrong direction and decided to sleep on someone's doorstep.

The nurses @ the tank asked for a new unit after they tried to test me several times....

Nurses: "Someone bring me a new one this one needs calibrated"

*nurse unwraps newly calibrated device*

Nurse: "Ok, now blow into this one"

*both nurses look astonished*

Nurse: "Never mind how are you talking to us so coherently, how are you even standing?"

Me: "Hi one huh?"

Nurse: ".42"

/I had a problem
//Just missed the tilt function I guess


Are you Irish? Or at least part Irish? That would be my defense...
 
2014-03-10 10:18:59 PM  
I'm not really astonished at his BAC. I am astonished that he had a passenger willing to ride with him.
 
Displayed 28 of 28 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report