If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Rocketnews 24)   How to freshen up your favorite pair of jeans without the risk fading and shrinkage. Hint: No water necessary   (en.rocketnews24.com) divider line 26
    More: Cool, Tommy Hilfiger, jeans, freezers  
•       •       •

1075 clicks; posted to FarkUs » on 09 Mar 2014 at 9:26 AM (32 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



26 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-09 03:49:03 AM  
Somehow I don't think they're taking skin oils into account here. Blech.
 
2014-03-09 08:54:51 AM  
Dear everybody:

Stop being pretentious farkwits about farking jeans. It's farking denim. If one cycle through the wash means they'll never fit right again, stop wearing your pants so farking tight. Nobody wants to see the outline of your junk anyway, hipster.
 
2014-03-09 09:00:50 AM  
Dead bacteria become food for more stinky bacteria and the cycle of life continues.

If you can't wash your Levi's because they will shrink, it is because Levi is cutting corners in the production of the cotton.  There is also the issue that China made cotton can be sold as cotton yet the same plant grown in other parts of the world can't be sold as cotton.

If the hipsters ever start looking at their clothes under a microscope, they modern clothing industry will be screwed.
 
2014-03-09 09:35:30 AM  
Surely a better way of killing bacteria would be to irradiate them. Just carry a lump of Cobalt 60 in your pocket.
 
2014-03-09 10:25:30 AM  
Took your advice, jeans now smell like fish sticks and Ben and Jerry's.

:(
 
NFA [TotalFark]
2014-03-09 10:41:21 AM  

incendi: Dear everybody:

Stop being pretentious farkwits about farking jeans. It's farking denim. If one cycle through the wash means they'll never fit right again, stop wearing your pants so farking tight. Nobody wants to see the outline of your junk anyway, hipster.


THIS

WTF is with people's obsession with making the wearing of filthy clothes socially acceptable?
 
2014-03-09 11:55:14 AM  

incendi: Dear everybody:

Stop being pretentious farkwits about farking jeans.


Pretty much this.

Stop buying $100 pairs of jeans and then trying voodoo to keep them in some bizarre preserved state.  Buy a $15 pair of jeans, wear the fark out of them, wash them normally, farking move on when they get worn out.
 
2014-03-09 11:59:52 AM  
How many farking times is fark going to post this dumbshiat hipster advice?
 
2014-03-09 12:57:38 PM  

AbiNormal: How many farking times is fark going to post this dumbshiat hipster advice?


7 to 19 more times, takes Hipsters awhile to catch on
 
2014-03-09 02:22:50 PM  

brap: Took your advice, jeans now smell like fish sticks and Ben and Jerry's.

:(


Thank you for not mentioning what the ice cream might smell like.
 
2014-03-09 02:24:37 PM  

DON.MAC: If you can't wash your Levi's because they will shrink, it is because Levi is cutting corners in the production of the cotton.  There is also the issue that China made cotton can be sold as cotton yet the same plant grown in other parts of the world can't be sold as cotton.


That seems interesting. May I ask what you're talking about?
 
2014-03-09 02:47:01 PM  

Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: incendi: Dear everybody:

Stop being pretentious farkwits about farking jeans.

Pretty much this.

Stop buying $100 pairs of jeans and then trying voodoo to keep them in some bizarre preserved state.  Buy a $15 pair of jeans, wear the fark out of them, wash them normally, farking move on when they get worn out.


This, exactly.
 
2014-03-09 03:05:48 PM  
" Double the despair if that pair set you back by a few hundred dollars to begin with. "

White boy problems.  You are going to the wrong Goodwill outlet.
 
2014-03-09 03:17:56 PM  

Tillmaster: Surely a better way of killing bacteria would be to irradiate them. Just carry a lump of Cobalt 60 in your pocket.


I thought you were just happy to see me.
 
2014-03-09 03:25:01 PM  
wash your farking jeans and take a bath...you and your jeans smell bad hipsters!
 
2014-03-09 03:44:17 PM  

incendi: Dear everybody:

Stop being pretentious farkwits about farking jeans. It's farking denim. If one cycle through the wash means they'll never fit right again, stop wearing your pants so farking tight. Nobody wants to see the outline of your junk anyway, hipster.


Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: Stop buying $100 pairs of jeans and then trying voodoo to keep them in some bizarre preserved state.  Buy a $15 pair of jeans, wear the fark out of them, wash them normally, farking move on when they get worn out.


What they said.
 
2014-03-09 05:38:21 PM  

Tillmaster: Surely a better way of killing bacteria would be to irradiate them. Just carry a lump of Cobalt 60 in your pocket.


Polonium would work better if you are in Europe.
 
2014-03-09 08:34:24 PM  

Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: incendi: Dear everybody:

Stop being pretentious farkwits about farking jeans.

Pretty much this.

Stop buying $100 pairs of jeans and then trying voodoo to keep them in some bizarre preserved state.  Buy a $15 pair of jeans, wear the fark out of them, wash them normally, farking move on when they get worn out.


That's what I do.

I'm in for buying moar jeans next month.
 
2014-03-09 08:37:43 PM  

RoyBatty: DON.MAC: If you can't wash your Levi's because they will shrink, it is because Levi is cutting corners in the production of the cotton.  There is also the issue that China made cotton can be sold as cotton yet the same plant grown in other parts of the world can't be sold as cotton.

That seems interesting. May I ask what you're talking about?


Cotton in the US is all from one type of plant.  When you translate that into Chinese (or most any Asian languages), you don't get the plant name but a group of plants.  The name of any of those plants is translated in to cotton.  If you look at the fibers of different cotton, you will see that some of it just isn't very good for making clothes but that is what the cheap stuff is and why it doesn't last as long as older fabric.
 
2014-03-09 08:44:46 PM  
You're supposed to buy your 501 Shrink-toFits oversize*, shrink then to fit you, and wash your nasty jeans (and, because it seems somebody needs to tell you) your disgusting goat-smelling hipster asses regularly.

*Fit & Sizing
If you plan to wash these jeans, order a larger size. For your waist, increase 1" for sizes 27-36", 2" for 38-48", and 3" for 50" and up. And for your inseam, increase 3" for 27-34" and 4" for 36" and up.

/What the fark is wrong with kids and lack of personal hygiene these days?
//Levi's really needs to start making them in the US with 15oz US ringspun denim again, dammit.
 
2014-03-09 10:26:09 PM  

bighairyguy: brap: Took your advice, jeans now smell like fish sticks and Ben and Jerry's.

:(

Thank you for not mentioning what the ice cream might smell like.


Like a chubby hubby, I'm guessing.
 
2014-03-09 11:15:33 PM  
This again? It was pretty thoroughly debunked last time around:

Smithsonian Magazine
Gizmodo
 
2014-03-10 03:25:51 AM  

DON.MAC: RoyBatty: DON.MAC: If you can't wash your Levi's because they will shrink, it is because Levi is cutting corners in the production of the cotton.  There is also the issue that China made cotton can be sold as cotton yet the same plant grown in other parts of the world can't be sold as cotton.

That seems interesting. May I ask what you're talking about?

Cotton in the US is all from one type of plant.  When you translate that into Chinese (or most any Asian languages), you don't get the plant name but a group of plants.  The name of any of those plants is translated in to cotton.  If you look at the fibers of different cotton, you will see that some of it just isn't very good for making clothes but that is what the cheap stuff is and why it doesn't last as long as older fabric.


Thank you.
 
2014-03-10 04:32:56 AM  
The article suggested just washing them in cold water so that they wouldn't be subject to the wear and tear from machine washing and line drying them instead of using the dryer.  It also showed a photo of a bunch of folded jeans next to a few bottles of liquor which I found amusing.  I'm assuming this was geared toward people who wouldn't have anything else in their freezer since frozen foods are a crime against nature and ice cream is animal cruelty...for those of us in the real world this wouldn't work since my freezer has some food in it and it's got some residue from putting a can of soda in there and then forgetting that I put it there.
I understand that it sucks when your favorite pair of pants or your favorite anything begins to wear out since it's what clothes do after repeated use but if you're paying $100 bucks for a pair of jeans I've got no sympathy for you.  I'm also of the school of thought that the whole point of wearing pants is that the rest of the world doesn't know whether or not you were circumcised from 100 feet away.
 
2014-03-10 04:08:38 PM  
I hope these non washers Fabreze the crap out of their jeans. Ewww..  Anyway, what do you do when it's time to wear your jeans?  I would think, you would have to put them in the dryer for a few moments.
 
2014-03-10 08:01:18 PM  

sandi_fish: I hope these non washers Fabreze the crap out of their jeans. Ewww..  Anyway, what do you do when it's time to wear your jeans?  I would think, you would have to put them in the dryer for a few moments.


Stop encouraging them: We already put up with their nois  "music" - don't add unnecessary stench** to the mix.

Let's run a pilpul on this.
The jeans are nasty.
When one dons them, the body may be either clean or dirty, and alive or dead.
If the nasty jeans go on a dirty body, alive or dead, Febreze does nothing for the funk.
If the nasty jeans go on clean body, they make the body instantly dirty.
The normal body heat of a living body will release the embedded stink, making Febreze of no effect.
Since jeans are not a kitel, and embalming is forbidden, this undoes the ritual cleaning, the body will still stink, and it renders the funeral nonkosher.
As you can see, an exhaustive examination of the outcomes for putting dirty jeans on a body, living, dead, clean or unwashed: Nasty and not kosher.

/**Unless you own a Febreze wholesale warehouse.
 
Displayed 26 of 26 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report