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(New York Daily News)   British man gets suspended sentence after being caught trying to have sex with a cow and a sheep in front of a couple having a romantic picnic. Did that couple ever think maybe they were disturbing this poor man's romantic evening?   (nydailynews.com) divider line 54
    More: Sick, suspended sentence, cattle, sheep  
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1838 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Mar 2014 at 10:56 AM (33 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



54 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-03-08 10:58:41 AM  
moo means moo!
 
2014-03-08 10:59:50 AM  
"Do you know why it is, when a rancher farks a sheep, he does so at the edge of a cliff? It's so the sheep will push back!"

www.ia-stud.hiof.no
 
2014-03-08 11:00:01 AM  
Ewe must be joking!
 
2014-03-08 11:02:09 AM  
Well, they obviously weren't in Scotland.....
 
2014-03-08 11:02:49 AM  
Dinner and a show, all in one. Smart thinking.
 
2014-03-08 11:03:17 AM  
What's the difference between a Scotsman and a Rolling Stone?

A Rolling Stone says "Hey you, get off of my cloud!", while a Scotsman says "Hey McLeod, get off of my ewe!"
 
2014-03-08 11:03:18 AM  
I thought being an Astros fan couldn't get any worse

assets.nydailynews.com
 
2014-03-08 11:03:27 AM  
You'd have thought they'd not stopped around after he farked the first animal.
 
2014-03-08 11:03:34 AM  
Now, was it with the cow and the sheep at the same time?  Because unless he was holding a gun, that sounds pretty consensual to me.  At least one of them could have run away at any time.

/dnrtfa
//Herkimer, NY is gonna love this story
 
2014-03-08 11:03:36 AM  
A cow and a sheep? Guy must have a million dollars.
 
2014-03-08 11:07:10 AM  
The Renaissance Resort in Aruba offers something similar to this as an add-on to their private island grotto package. We passed, but did see the iguana at the cabana bar and she was pretty hot.
 
2014-03-08 11:09:23 AM  
Maybe he's just a misunderstood performance artist.
 
2014-03-08 11:10:22 AM  
This guy sounds so very liberal ....Breaking down those fundie walls is all fun and games till someone catches an STD .
 
2014-03-08 11:13:59 AM  

i253.photobucket.com

 
2014-03-08 11:15:59 AM  

RottenEggs: This guy sounds so very liberal ....Breaking down those fundie walls is all fun and games till someone catches an STD .


Or, hoof and mouth disease.
 
2014-03-08 11:17:06 AM  

VladTheEmailer: You'd have thought they'd not stopped around after he farked the first animal.


I don't think they're there for the picnic
 
2014-03-08 11:19:17 AM  
Spend all my life as an IT expert.

Wouldn't you know..fark just one cow..and hey look at that sheep.
 
2014-03-08 11:19:30 AM  

Fano: VladTheEmailer: You'd have thought they'd not stopped around after he farked the first animal.

I don't think they're there for the picnic


They were there to see someone eat some beef, though.
 
2014-03-08 11:21:49 AM  
Where do you think sheeple come from?
 
2014-03-08 11:27:02 AM  
The video is hilarious.

/The cow turned him down.  The sheep showed him her honeypot.
 
2014-03-08 11:37:44 AM  
"I felt sick for what was happening, it sort of disturbed me."

But at the same time, it made her want to ditch her date and join in on the fun. Pretty sure the cow would've been alot more happy munching her grass than chomping on his dong.
 
2014-03-08 11:44:15 AM  

brimed03: Now, was it with the cow and the sheep at the same time?  Because unless he was holding a gun, that sounds pretty consensual to me.  At least one of them could have run away at any time.

/dnrtfa
//Herkimer, NY is gonna love this story


The cow had the gun and was forcing the man and the sheep.  They said she had them cowed.
 
2014-03-08 12:09:09 PM  

Fano: VladTheEmailer: You'd have thought they'd not stopped around after he farked the first animal.

I don't think they're there for the picnic


HA! I bet that'll fly right over a few heads.
 
2014-03-08 12:20:59 PM  
 
2014-03-08 12:23:05 PM  

The_Sponge: What's the difference between a Scotsman and a Rolling Stone?

A Rolling Stone says "Hey you, get off of my cloud!", while a Scotsman says "Hey McLeod, get off of my ewe!"


A Rabbi was molesting a farmers livestock, when the farmer yelled " Hey, Jew, get offa my cow"

I pointed at my cousin and laughed. He said "so what, you're doing it too".
I said "yea, but you got the ugly one".
 
2014-03-08 12:31:19 PM  
www.redicecreations.com
 
2014-03-08 12:33:54 PM  
Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.
 
2014-03-08 12:46:33 PM  

CoysOdie: The_Sponge: What's the difference between a Scotsman and a Rolling Stone?

A Rolling Stone says "Hey you, get off of my cloud!", while a Scotsman says "Hey McLeod, get off of my ewe!"

A Rabbi was molesting a farmers livestock, when the farmer yelled " Hey, Jew, get offa my cow"

I pointed at my cousin and laughed. He said "so what, you're doing it too".
I said "yea, but you got the ugly one".


If there's one thing I can't abide, it's a SheepShagging Rabbi.
 
2014-03-08 01:03:33 PM  
A cow? That's sick.
 
2014-03-08 01:30:30 PM  
Well, technically he can now cross "threesome" off his bucket list.
 
2014-03-08 01:31:27 PM  
There is a fetish for everyone. Sex with multiple animals while an audience watches is pretty specific.
 
2014-03-08 02:13:22 PM  
Patton Oswalt's crackhead story...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PakOP-AkzUI&t=2m50s
 
2014-03-08 02:42:45 PM  
I was here first!
 
2014-03-08 04:07:50 PM  
Stupid Brits, don't they know its supposed to be a dog in front of a daycare!
 
2014-03-08 05:11:08 PM  

The Ice Queen: Stupid Brits, don't they know its supposed to be a dog in front of a daycare!


Or a goat in front of train passengers
 
2014-03-08 05:22:32 PM  
At some point we are going to have to consider neutering people. It has to be kinder to them to not be feeling so desperate to fark absolutely anything all the time.

The animal population would sure appreciate it.
 
2014-03-08 05:34:41 PM  
He tried to get a cow to suck his dick. Now that is an extra special shade of crazy.
 
2014-03-08 07:14:19 PM  

Nidiot: At some point we are going to have to consider neutering people. It has to be kinder to them to not be feeling so desperate to fark absolutely anything all the time.

The animal population would sure appreciate it.


images.sodahead.com


johnozed.com
.....you may be missing out to the possibility that animals don't dislike it as much as you would like to think.
 
2014-03-08 07:27:21 PM  

omeganuepsilon: Nidiot: At some point we are going to have to consider neutering people. It has to be kinder to them to not be feeling so desperate to fark absolutely anything all the time.

The animal population would sure appreciate it.

[images.sodahead.com image 198x300]


[johnozed.com image 555x416]
.....you may be missing out to the possibility that animals don't dislike it as much as you would like to think.


Fair enough. As long as you are willing to let the animal be the pitcher, I say go right ahead. No harm, no foul.
 
2014-03-08 08:06:09 PM  
"You caught me . . . I tried to fark your sheep."
 
2014-03-08 08:24:27 PM  
Whoa.....That is NOT how animal husbandry works, bucko.
 
2014-03-08 10:27:37 PM  

Nidiot: omeganuepsilon: Nidiot: At some point we are going to have to consider neutering people. It has to be kinder to them to not be feeling so desperate to fark absolutely anything all the time.

The animal population would sure appreciate it.

[images.sodahead.com image 198x300]


[johnozed.com image 555x416]
.....you may be missing out to the possibility that animals don't dislike it as much as you would like to think.

Fair enough. As long as you are willing to let the animal be the pitcher, I say go right ahead. No harm, no foul.


What does this have to do with me?

Anyhow, it is often the case where women take it from an animal.  Why is that ok, but with men it's wrong?

/you sound sexist
 
2014-03-08 11:17:00 PM  

omeganuepsilon: Nidiot: omeganuepsilon: Nidiot: At some point we are going to have to consider neutering people. It has to be kinder to them to not be feeling so desperate to fark absolutely anything all the time.

The animal population would sure appreciate it.

[images.sodahead.com image 198x300]


[johnozed.com image 555x416]
.....you may be missing out to the possibility that animals don't dislike it as much as you would like to think.

Fair enough. As long as you are willing to let the animal be the pitcher, I say go right ahead. No harm, no foul.

What does this have to do with me?

Anyhow, it is often the case where women take it from an animal.  Why is that ok, but with men it's wrong?

/you sound sexist


Because forcing an object, including body parts, into an orifice that is not designed to take said object, may be damaging and painful, and personally I don't think animals should have to suffer pain just so some guy can relieve his sexual frustration. I'm not entirely sure that an animal that gets to put it's body part into some human orifice suffers pain as a result. Hence I am less disturbed if the guy were to take the animal's penis up his ass, as opposed to the man putting his penis in the animal's ass. It's purely a practical consideration. I am against causing unnecessary pain to an animal. If the human is so disturbed as to want to do sexual activities with an animal in the first place, well that is their problem, but my concern lies with the welfare of the animal first and foremost.
 
2014-03-08 11:52:36 PM  
I think you have an unhealthy obsession with penises in asses.

Also, the vaginal cavity on most livestock is rather large, even the anal one, so the pain you seem to think is always coupled with penile penetration is largely unfounded.  Some, like cows and horses, may not even notice.  Just fyi.

You'd know that just from watching documentaries, seeing someone like Mike Rowe shoulder deep in some creatures vag/anus can be informative, if a bit gross.
 
2014-03-09 12:45:13 AM  

omeganuepsilon: Also, the vaginal cavity on most livestock is rather large, even the anal one


That includes elephants. (probably NSFW)
 
2014-03-09 01:17:20 AM  

omeganuepsilon: I think you have an unhealthy obsession with penises in asses.

Also, the vaginal cavity on most livestock is rather large, even the anal one, so the pain you seem to think is always coupled with penile penetration is largely unfounded.  Some, like cows and horses, may not even notice.  Just fyi.

You'd know that just from watching documentaries, seeing someone like Mike Rowe shoulder deep in some creatures vag/anus can be informative, if a bit gross.


This is also true, which is why it disturbs me less than when it is a story about some guy and a cow, as opposed to a story about some guy and a dog. Especially when the dog had to be taken to the vet in order to tend to the resultant injuries. Stories involving dogs also tend to include how the dog became cowering and fearful after the event, which doesn't indicate it was having a happy fun time.

Vaginas use doesn't get a pass since unwanted penis in a vagina that is either small or appropriate in size is also painful. Unwanted tends to mean there is no lubrication, which then means pain and anyone who hasn't got one cannot honestly say otherwise. It's true cows barely even blink when getting preg tested, which requires a whole arm. Bit whenever there is the chance that the animal is suffering just so someone can get their jollies, I'm still calling the perpetrator an utter bastard.
 
2014-03-09 08:26:18 AM  

Nidiot: unwanted


Nidiot: Unwanted


Yeah, we get it, actual rape is bad, most anyone would even agree.

cyberspacedout: omeganuepsilon: Also, the vaginal cavity on most livestock is rather large, even the anal one

That includes elephants. (probably NSFW)


That dirty disghusting elephant raping that guy.  It should be hanged until death!
 
2014-03-09 11:03:22 AM  
fark, always has to be someone from IT.
 
2014-03-09 05:35:54 PM  

omeganuepsilon: Yeah, we get it, actual rape is bad, most anyone would even agree.


Oddly enough, any sexual penetration of an animal is rape, since it didn't give consent.

You asked why a woman taking it from an animal (and it wouldn't have to be a woman, a man might also be on the receiving end) isn't viewed as badly, it's not a sexist view, it's because in order to perform such an act there would have to be some sort of willingness on the part of the animal. When animal is acting as a receptacle for some dude's dick, however, it is never anything other than a victim of rape. Animals probably don't have a concept of humiliation and the like, but when you have the possibility of injuries and pain, I'm pretty sure the animals would much rather humans just kept it in their pants.

Either way, I'm certain animals would rather be left to get on with their own animal lives instead of having to deal with some oversexed human with a complete lack of boundaries. They really don't give a shiat how sexually frustrated any particular human is, and there is no reason why they should. If a human cannot sort out their sexual urges on their own, that is too bad, there is no requirement for any other sentient creature to help them out.
 
2014-03-09 05:39:53 PM  
omeganuepsilon:cyberspacedout: omeganuepsilon: Also, the vaginal cavity on most livestock is rather large, even the anal one

That includes elephants. (probably NSFW)

That dirty disghusting elephant raping that guy.  It should be hanged until death!



Aw c'mon, how many guys get to say they had an elephant give them head.
 
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