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(Newser)   Old Chinese saying: Fortune smiles for those who read fortune cookies   ( newser.com) divider line
    More: Spiffy, old Chinese, CBS New York  
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2065 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Mar 2014 at 4:27 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



26 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-07 04:31:30 PM  
Woman who fly upside down destined to have nasty crackup?
 
2014-03-07 04:31:32 PM  
News flash: the guy who wrote those numbers and stuffed them into a cookie is right now going postal in an Asian bakery.  Y U no use numbers?
 
2014-03-07 04:31:53 PM  
Duvoll, 75, ...
..."I plan to invest it and save it,"

Blowing it all at once is bad, sure, but you're 75.
Seems like a bad idea to me.
 
2014-03-07 04:33:57 PM  
 
2014-03-07 04:35:31 PM  

rkiller1: Long but incredibly helpful


That's what I tell the ladies
 
2014-03-07 04:41:16 PM  

God-is-a-Taco: rkiller1: Long but incredibly helpful

That's what I tell the ladies


3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-03-07 04:46:52 PM  
Yeah well it also says never trust Japanese waitress bearing fortune cookie.
 
2014-03-07 04:47:00 PM  
I forsee sales of fortune cookie crap skyrocketing
 
2014-03-07 04:47:28 PM  
Is she single?
 
2014-03-07 04:54:08 PM  
Confucius once say ,"man who go to bed with itchy butt, wake up with smelly finger."

-my twelve year old self
 
2014-03-07 04:54:33 PM  
I got one once that said "always wear your second best pants to a revolution". But I didn't win anything. Damn zips
 
2014-03-07 04:54:53 PM  
Ancient Chinese Secret?
 
2014-03-07 04:57:30 PM  
Meanwhile, what did I get in my last fortune cookie?

"Your problem just got much bigger.  Think, what have you done?"

/I got a rock on Halloween too...
 
2014-03-07 04:59:25 PM  

Mark Ratner: Confucius once say ,"man who go to bed with itchy butt, wake up with smelly finger."

-my twelve year old self


Better than "Confucius say man who go bed with itchy butt wake up with roommate has smelly fist."
 
2014-03-07 05:05:27 PM  
Japanese-inspired, Chinese-themed, American consumed.
 
2014-03-07 05:10:59 PM  
yeah she played the lotto numbers, but did she do anything to help save the guy trapped in the fortune cookie factory?
 
2014-03-07 05:18:33 PM  
In bed
 
2014-03-07 05:18:51 PM  
Confucius say "Ok to meet girl in park, better to park meat in girl"
 
2014-03-07 05:28:57 PM  
They don't have fortune cookies in China, they're a Western thing that confuses the Chinese.
 
2014-03-07 05:34:55 PM  

God-is-a-Taco: rkiller1: Long but incredibly helpful

That's what I tell the ladies


this is large, too
 
2014-03-07 05:36:38 PM  

onyxruby: They don't have fortune cookies in China, they're a Western thing that confuses the Chinese.


It does not confuse them, but it does remove the minor vestiges of respect they MIGHT have for us - but you are right, it is a western thing, Ive never had one served to me in China and nobody there I spoke to knows why we call it "chinese"
 
2014-03-07 05:47:38 PM  

Slartibartfaster: onyxruby: They don't have fortune cookies in China, they're a Western thing that confuses the Chinese.

It does not confuse them, but it does remove the minor vestiges of respect they MIGHT have for us - but you are right, it is a western thing, Ive never had one served to me in China and nobody there I spoke to knows why we call it "chinese"


The Chinese people I know have been confused by them. They don't understand why they're called Chinese and they don't understand the fortune reference. I'm in agreement that they hurt our image. I think it's a bit like French Fries, the French don't understand those either.
 
2014-03-07 05:58:48 PM  
Confucius say, Man who go through turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
 
2014-03-07 06:35:08 PM  
If I made those cookie fortunes I would include the day's winning numbers everyday and week just so that someone, somewhere could think to themselves, "damn, if I had only had this food last week I would have won"
 
2014-03-07 08:51:32 PM  
As always:

i1.ytimg.com
 
2014-03-07 09:31:57 PM  
More Confucius say

Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

Baseball is wrong. Man with four balls cannot walk.

War doesn't determine who is right, only who is left.

Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.

Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

Man who run behind car get exhausted.

It take many nails to build crib but one screw to fill it.

Man who fishes in other man's well often catches crabs.

Man who go to bed with itchy butt wake up with stinky fingers.

Marriage is like game of poker. You start with pair and end with full house.

Man who farts in church sits in his own pew. He who eats too many prunes, sits on toilet many moons.

Elevator smell different to midget.

Squirrel That Runs Up Women's Leg - Finds No Nuts.
 
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