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(ESPN)   Nike buys Johnny Football. Johnny Football now buys whatever the hell he wants   (espn.go.com) divider line 44
    More: Obvious, Johnny Manziel, New Balance, Darren Rovell, Under Armour, Colin Kaepernick, Drew Brees, KeJuan Wilkins, LeBron James  
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1360 clicks; posted to Sports » on 07 Mar 2014 at 1:33 PM (25 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



44 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-07 01:43:10 PM
It's good to see a rich white kid finally get somewhere in this world.
 
2014-03-07 01:43:18 PM
He was already rich. meh.
 
2014-03-07 01:51:05 PM
Man, I wish Duke had won that game.
 
2014-03-07 01:51:49 PM
Is there a moral turpitude clause?
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-03-07 02:07:59 PM
Will he have to use a Nike football that will screw up his throws for a couple years? Or does that only apply to golf?
 
2014-03-07 02:28:49 PM
That's a lot of money to spend on the next Tim Tebow.
 
2014-03-07 02:31:26 PM
Hai guyz!
i.cdn.turner.com
 
2014-03-07 02:31:50 PM

Kevin Lomax: It's good to see a rich white kid finally get somewhere in this world.


Such a shame.
 
2014-03-07 02:56:24 PM

LarryDan43: Will he have to use a Nike football that will screw up his throws for a couple years? Or does that only apply to golf?


as a guy that used to work in the Wilson Football factory I dub you 'good guy Larry'
 
2014-03-07 03:07:59 PM

Odd Bird: Is there a moral turpitude clause?
[1.bp.blogspot.com image 298x257]


Porky's was bad. Awesomely bad.
 
2014-03-07 03:12:32 PM
I hope they have new cleat technology because that's the most of what we'll be seeing if the Browns end up drafting him...

/He'll be on his back because the O-Line sucks...
//The Browns suck
///I'm a Brownie for life and I truly believe the above statement..
////SLASHIES!!!!!!
 
2014-03-07 03:19:25 PM

SDRR: Odd Bird: Is there a moral turpitude clause?
[1.bp.blogspot.com image 298x257]

Porky's was bad. Awesomely bad.


Could you describe the tallywhacker?
 
2014-03-07 03:29:01 PM
Houston needs a quarterback who can be developed in the next 2-3 years.

Houston has to take him 100% as the #1 pick with how committed they are to not falling into another 10 years of obscurity.

If they phark up and take another defensive lineman like they did with Mario Williams with their first #1 pick fans will just walk away

I dont know if they would go full Jerry-Jones and take Bridgewater but if they did all the A&M alum that work for the petrochemical businesses in Houston would collectively lose their shiat
 
2014-03-07 03:42:36 PM

smerfnablin: Houston needs a quarterback who can be developed in the next 2-3 years.

Houston has to take him 100% as the #1 pick with how committed they are to not falling into another 10 years of obscurity.

If they phark up and take another defensive lineman like they did with Mario Williams with their first #1 pick fans will just walk away

I dont know if they would go full Jerry-Jones and take Bridgewater but if they did all the A&M alum that work for the petrochemical businesses in Houston would collectively lose their shiat


Mario Williams turned out to be a much better player than either Young or Leinart, so that was actually a good move. Who did you want them to take instead?
 
2014-03-07 03:46:06 PM

SigmaAlgebra: Mario Williams turned out to be a much better player than either Young or Leinart, so that was actually a good move. Who did you want them to take instead?


I believe my sarcasm detector was going off on that post.  Either that or some grade-A trolling.

I think Reggie Bush was the favorite coming out of that draft, but Jay Cutler was probably the best QB option.
 
2014-03-07 03:50:42 PM

Incontinent_dog_and_monkey_rodeo: SDRR: Odd Bird: Is there a moral turpitude clause?
[1.bp.blogspot.com image 298x257]

Porky's was bad. Awesomely bad.

Could you describe the tallywhacker?


why do they call you meat?

/and by "you" I mean "me"
 
2014-03-07 03:50:55 PM

RedArny: Hai guyz!
[i.cdn.turner.com image 641x499]


lulz, Johnny's not going to crash land the way he has.  I won't expect Manzell to be in the league within 5 years.

He's the polar opposite of JaWalrus in terms of body, but he'll have the same epitaph to his footballing career:  Athleticism: unparalleled.  Football knowledge: zero.
 
2014-03-07 04:06:48 PM
OK, so the Brown's will have to re-think this one more time. If they sign JFM they could ask for some extra's from NIKE, like a couple of socks, a few pairs of cleats and a T-shirt or two.  This could offset the salary and eventual loss of fans.
 
2014-03-07 04:09:36 PM
Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.
 
2014-03-07 04:13:44 PM
Curious... why doesn't Nike just run a sports agency? Or would having to represent the athlete's actual interests run counter to their corporate goals?
 
2014-03-07 04:19:44 PM

TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.


Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.
 
2014-03-07 04:23:43 PM

TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.


Wow. That is the most Jerrah move ever.
 
2014-03-07 04:27:36 PM

Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.


It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1
 
2014-03-07 04:37:18 PM
I think Johnny can throw a football.  The trick will be to see if he can throw it before he gets squished like a bug by 400 pound linemen.
 
2014-03-07 04:38:32 PM

bkosh84: I hope they have new cleat technology because that's the most of what we'll be seeing if the Browns end up drafting him...

/He'll be on his back because the O-Line sucks...
//The Browns suck
///I'm a Brownie for life and I truly believe the above statement..
////SLASHIES!!!!!!


They really don't, though. They are pretty solid as long as the QB doesn't try to hold on to the ball for 20 seconds. Even Joe Thomas can't hold the line forever.
 
2014-03-07 04:43:54 PM

TrainingWheelsNeeded: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.

It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1


Wow, just wow.  That was one dumbass article; does Mr. Galloway realize the NFL is several levels up in class from the SEC?  Does he remember what friggin' Alabama and Auburn did to JF in College Station?

I mean, it's fun to rag on Jerruh and all, but in no way is he that farking stupid that he'll trade a Pro Bowl-caliber QB for a "maybe".
 
2014-03-07 04:44:27 PM

TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.


While funny, Tony Romo by himself is not worth the #1 overall pick.

Especially after finishing the season on the surgeons table.

Tony Romo and multiple picks might be realistic and I wouldn't put it past Jerreh.
 
2014-03-07 04:44:53 PM

TheGreatGazoo: I think Johnny can throw a football.  The trick will be to see if he can throw it before he gets squished like a bug by 400 pound linemen.


400 pound linemen that move quicker than any CFB lineman can...and hit twice as hard.
 
2014-03-07 04:46:54 PM

Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.

It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1

Wow, just wow.  That was one dumbass article; does Mr. Galloway realize the NFL is several levels up in class from the SEC?  Does he remember what friggin' Alabama and Auburn did to JF in College Station?

I mean, it's fun to rag on Jerruh and all, but in no way is he that farking stupid that he'll trade a Pro Bowl-caliber QB for a "maybe".


You think that deal is bad for DALLAS?  LOL
 
2014-03-07 04:48:41 PM

PluckYew: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.

It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1

Wow, just wow.  That was one dumbass article; does Mr. Galloway realize the NFL is several levels up in class from the SEC?  Does he remember what friggin' Alabama and Auburn did to JF in College Station?

I mean, it's fun to rag on Jerruh and all, but in no way is he that farking stupid that he'll trade a Pro Bowl-caliber QB for a "maybe".

You think that deal is bad for DALLAS?  LOL


Would you be scared of a Dallas "O" being led by Romo or would you be scared of a Dallas "O" being led by that twirp?
 
2014-03-07 04:53:18 PM

Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.

It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1

Wow, just wow.  That was one dumbass article; does Mr. Galloway realize the NFL is several levels up in class from the SEC?  Does he remember what friggin' Alabama and Auburn did to JF in College Station?

I mean, it's fun to rag on Jerruh and all, but in no way is he that farking stupid that he'll trade a Pro Bowl-caliber QB for a "maybe".


Don't jinx it.
 
2014-03-07 05:04:04 PM

SigmaAlgebra: smerfnablin: Houston needs a quarterback who can be developed in the next 2-3 years.

Mario Williams turned out to be a much better player than either Young or Leinart, so that was actually a good move. Who did you want them to take instead?



At the time? They needed to draft a big offensive lineman so Houston didnt have to suffer through years of Carr being turned into hamburger

I know this might sound stupid, but if you are building a team and are going to draft high in the first round take an Offensive Lineman or Defensive Back

You can build around that and sign the flash skill players in free agency.

What makes houston different is they finally HAVE talent. They have the line and they have a defense. What they need is a quarterback to put them in position to win.
 
2014-03-07 05:12:51 PM

TheGreatGazoo: I think Johnny can throw a football.  The trick will be to see if he can throw it before he gets squished like a bug by 400 pound linemen.


That will be up to his offensive line.
 
2014-03-07 06:15:44 PM
He should buy something that can keep him the hell out of Cleveland.

/he won't be a bust
//unless he ends up wearing Brown on Sundays
 
2014-03-07 06:15:52 PM

Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.

It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1

Wow, just wow.  That was one dumbass article; does Mr. Galloway realize the NFL is several levels up in class from the SEC?  Does he remember what friggin' Alabama and Auburn did to JF in College Station?

I mean, it's fun to rag on Jerruh and all, but in no way is he that farking stupid that he'll trade a Pro Bowl-caliber QB for a "maybe".


There was an article yesterday explaining why that would never happen.....namely it would cost the Cowboys $32.5 million to trade Romo with his guarantees and everything...and no one is going to pay that to a player not even on their team anymore

/unless it's baseball and you use roids
 
2014-03-07 06:38:55 PM
Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.

It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway Grandpa Urine. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1

Wow, just wow.  That was one dumbass article; does Mr. Galloway Grandpa Urine realize the NFL is several levels up in class from the SEC?  Does he remember what friggin' Alabama and Auburn did to JF in College Station?

I mean, it's fun to rag on Jerruh and all, but in no way is he that farking stupid that he'll trade a Pro Bowl-caliber QB for a "maybe".


-FTFY
 
2014-03-07 06:52:54 PM
It worked for RG3
 
2014-03-07 09:51:49 PM

Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.

It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1

Wow, just wow.  That was one dumbass article; does Mr. Galloway realize the NFL is several levels up in class from the SEC?  Does he remember what friggin' Alabama and Auburn did to JF in College Station?

I mean, it's fun to rag on Jerruh and all, but in no way is he that farking stupid that he'll trade a Pro Bowl-caliber QB for a "maybe".



Oh yeah, Bama really shut him down that day: 28-39, 464 yards, 5 TDs, 203.8 rating, plus 98 yards rushing.

Auburn, too: 28-38, 454 yards, 4 TDs, 198.2 rating, plus 48 rushing and another TD.
 
2014-03-07 10:29:06 PM

Hamilstan: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.

It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1

Wow, just wow.  That was one dumbass article; does Mr. Galloway realize the NFL is several levels up in class from the SEC?  Does he remember what friggin' Alabama and Auburn did to JF in College Station?

I mean, it's fun to rag on Jerruh and all, but in no way is he that farking stupid that he'll trade a Pro Bowl-caliber QB for a "maybe".


Oh yeah, Bama really shut him down that day: 28-39, 464 yards, 5 TDs, 203.8 rating, plus 98 yards rushing.

Auburn, too: 28-38, 454 yards, 4 TDs, 198.2 rating, plus 48 rushing and another TD.


Both resulted in "L"s right?  So yeah, they count.
 
2014-03-07 10:44:24 PM

Rwa2play: Hamilstan: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.

It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1

Wow, just wow.  That was one dumbass article; does Mr. Galloway realize the NFL is several levels up in class from the SEC?  Does he remember what friggin' Alabama and Auburn did to JF in College Station?

I mean, it's fun to rag on Jerruh and all, but in no way is he that farking stupid that he'll trade a Pro Bowl-caliber QB for a "maybe".


Oh yeah, Bama really shut him down that day: 28-39, 464 yards, 5 TDs, 203.8 rating, plus 98 yards rushing.

Auburn, too: 28-38, 454 yards, 4 TDs, 198.2 rating, plus 48 rushing and another TD.

Both resulted in "L"s right?  So yeah, they count.


Yeah, I'm sure NFL scouts and GMs will factor JF's failure to play defense into their evaluations.
 
2014-03-08 12:57:43 AM

TrainingWheelsNeeded: Rwa2play: TrainingWheelsNeeded: Heard that Jerry Jones is thinking of trading Romo to the Texans for the number one draft so the Cowboys can take Johnny Football.

Source?  That would be soooooo farking funny if Jerruh is that stupid.

It is stupid, and really the brain child of a long time Dallas sports reporter, Randy Galloway. Some times it's hard to tell if he's drunk or not. I have to copy and paste, sorry.

http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933/johnny-football-was-b o rn-to-play.html?rh=1">http://www.star-telegram.com/2014/03/01/5612933 /johnny-football-was-bo rn-to-play.html?rh=1


That was either written by a retarded third grader or a Texan.  It's almost impossible to tell.  Romos contract has 41 million worth of "dead money" that would be accelerated against the cap.

http://overthecap.com/teamcap.php?Team=Cowboys&Year=2014overthecap.c om /teamcap.php?Team=Cowboys&Year=2014overthecap.com/teamcap.php?Team=Cow boys&Year=2014

That makes trading Romo an impossibility.  But why let a thing like facts disturb a retards fevered dream.
 
2014-03-08 06:18:15 AM
If only there were a 'gew' league, or someone was buying 'gews'

/Famous Gewwish sports legends...
 
2014-03-08 08:43:46 AM

smerfnablin: SigmaAlgebra: smerfnablin: Houston needs a quarterback who can be developed in the next 2-3 years.

Mario Williams turned out to be a much better player than either Young or Leinart, so that was actually a good move. Who did you want them to take instead?


At the time? They needed to draft a big offensive lineman so Houston didnt have to suffer through years of Carr being turned into hamburger

I know this might sound stupid, but if you are building a team and are going to draft high in the first round take an Offensive Lineman or Defensive Back

You can build around that and sign the flash skill players in free agency.

What makes houston different is they finally HAVE talent. They have the line and they have a defense. What they need is a quarterback to put them in position to win.


How about they draft Clowney first overall, then move their 2nd and 4th to Washington for Kirk Cousins?

You walk away from the draft with (maybe) the next J-P Paul or Mario Williams and a (promising young) starting QB.  That would be good.
 
2014-03-08 08:37:34 PM
I wish the draft would hurry up and get here. The stupidity has been ratcheted up to level plaid
 
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