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(Slate)   Now that the monocle is making a return among the New York hipster scene, here are five other possible fashion trends for the uber-cool to consider   (slate.com) divider line 180
    More: Stupid, fashion trends, Elizabethan, Peerage of England, market trends  
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10663 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Mar 2014 at 3:15 PM (27 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



180 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-06 01:48:30 PM
"I wore an ombre top bun throughout my 20s, but then the pickler at my co-op was like, 'Didn't I see you in that 30 Seconds to Mars video?' At that point I was like, 'OK: what's next?' " said Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label and can be seen powdering his billowing horsehair wig with arsenic-laden powder in a three-second video posted to the micro experience-sharing app Twine. "Also, I'm balding."

The staggering amount of fail contained within this passage leaves me hoping that it can only be satire.
 
2014-03-06 01:56:03 PM
So you could say it's a ... Mr. Peanut cluster?
 
2014-03-06 01:59:20 PM
Also, why not bring back the codpiece if you're going to be revisiting old fashions?
 
2014-03-06 02:03:58 PM
Oooh...maybe they'll bring back wearing roach clips with feathers and beads in one's hair.
 
2014-03-06 02:06:27 PM
I need to see some actual photo evidence of New York hipsters wearing monocles in non-costume settings before I'll believe that they're making a return in any real sense.
 
2014-03-06 02:07:31 PM

Lorelle: Oooh...maybe they'll bring back wearing roach clips with feathers and beads in one's hair.


um, that's most definitely a thing again.  mostly with the early-20's, female, bedroom-slippers-for-shoes set.
 
2014-03-06 02:09:16 PM

Pocket Ninja: I need to see some actual photo evidence of New York hipsters wearing monocles in non-costume settings before I'll believe that they're making a return in any real sense.


i'll be in williamsburg this weekend (is that still the hipster capital of the world, or has it moved on to a place i've never heard of?), i'll report back.
 
2014-03-06 02:10:34 PM
When I was a kid, I started noticing that my eyesight was worse in one eye than the other. Being a kid, I thought that meant I'd have to wear a monocle, so I started practicing how to wear one. Which is why today I can raise one eyebrow.
 
2014-03-06 02:11:11 PM

doublesecretprobation: Lorelle: Oooh...maybe they'll bring back wearing roach clips with feathers and beads in one's hair.

um, that's most definitely a thing again.  mostly with the early-20's, female, bedroom-slippers-for-shoes set.


What's old is new again.

/had feathered roach clips in the 1970s
 
2014-03-06 02:15:20 PM
The next big thing will be opening your pants to reveal an actual baby holding a fresh organic heritage breed apple.


i253.photobucket.comThe days of cutting corners through metaphor are over folks, people crave the real deal.
 
2014-03-06 02:15:51 PM

Lorelle: Oooh...maybe they'll bring back wearing roach clips with feathers and beads in one's hair.


I've done that.

Except I used leather thongs to tie the feathers and beads to my mohawk.  And the beads on a string hanging down spelled out "FUAC" in Morse code.
 
2014-03-06 02:16:41 PM

Pocket Ninja: I need to see some actual photo evidence of New York hipsters wearing monocles in non-costume settings before I'll believe that they're making a return in any real sense.


i1-news.softpedia-static.com
 
2014-03-06 02:21:51 PM

Pocket Ninja: I need to see some actual photo evidence of New York hipsters wearing monocles in non-costume settings before I'll believe that they're making a return in any real sense.


rootzwiki.com

Based on GIS it seems to be this guy and one other. There's your trend.
 
2014-03-06 02:25:05 PM
First person I see wearing a monocle gets kicked in the nuts just on principle.
 
2014-03-06 02:25:31 PM
newsimg.bbc.co.uk

I've said it before and I'll say it again - the next big thing will be Dame Edna glasses.
 
2014-03-06 02:25:42 PM
TODAY'S HIPSTER BEATING.
"Today I saw Ethan taking a "food porn" picture of his $10 imported licorice infused latte for his Brooklyn based blog that only his enabling Culdesacian parents read to know their fragile red bearded son is keeping busy on their dime. So I dragged his empty-ketchup-packet shaped body behind the counter and ran him through the coffee bean grinder. End of story."
 
2014-03-06 02:26:17 PM
i assume the pince-nez will return next.
 
2014-03-06 02:34:37 PM

FlashHarry: i assume the pince-nez will return next.


A few weeks ago I went to Silver Lake, a hipster-infested L.A. neighborhood, and saw lotsa people wearing huge black-framed glasses, both prescription and sunglasses. I don't recall seeing any monocles or pince-nez glasses, though.
 
2014-03-06 02:34:54 PM
A friend and I have been proposing for years now that a good hipster trend would be tricked-out crutches.
 
2014-03-06 02:41:15 PM
I wear a monocle sunglass. I close one eye and block the sun out of the other.
 
2014-03-06 02:42:20 PM

Lorelle: A few weeks ago I went to Silver Lake, a hipster-infested L.A. neighborhood, and saw lotsa people wearing huge black-framed glasses, both prescription and sunglasses. I don't recall seeing any monocles or pince-nez glasses, though.


i have been to silverlake several times, so i'm picking up what you're laying down.

any fake eyepatches? i figure that might be a "thing" soon.
 
2014-03-06 02:45:39 PM

Solid State Vittles: A friend and I have been proposing for years now that a good hipster trend would be tricked-out crutches.


cdn2.bigcommerce.com
 
2014-03-06 02:50:36 PM
Unless you are a jeweler, there is not purpose to a monocle.

naughtyrev: Also, why not bring back the codpiece if you're going to be revisiting old fashions?


Pfft. Codpiece. Penis gourd is where it's at.
 
2014-03-06 02:56:02 PM

31.media.tumblr.com

 
2014-03-06 02:57:22 PM

Lorelle: Solid State Vittles: A friend and I have been proposing for years now that a good hipster trend would be tricked-out crutches.

[cdn2.bigcommerce.com image 700x700]


It's important to mention that the user of said crutches should not be injured.

Also, thick black glasses frames have been hipster de rigueur for at least a decade now.
 
2014-03-06 03:00:23 PM

Solid State Vittles: Lorelle: Solid State Vittles: A friend and I have been proposing for years now that a good hipster trend would be tricked-out crutches.

[cdn2.bigcommerce.com image 700x700]

It's important to mention that the user of said crutches should not be injured.

Also, thick black glasses frames have been hipster de rigueur for at least a decade now.


I know, but the really huge frames seem to be a more recent trend.
 
2014-03-06 03:08:52 PM
A bunch of the hipsters around here are getting fatter and fatter by the week. It's really pathetic to see a skinny jeans muffin top. I like to call them ice cream cones.
 
2014-03-06 03:17:49 PM
Yeah, they're not hipsters.

www.whitemischief.info
 
2014-03-06 03:18:35 PM
Yeah, because what we need to come back were those super cool plague bird masks.

/*shudder*
 
2014-03-06 03:19:21 PM
I wish they'd bring back more writers I don't want to instantly punch in the face.
 
2014-03-06 03:19:23 PM
I wish they would bring back footie pajamas.  :(
 
2014-03-06 03:21:22 PM
media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com
 
2014-03-06 03:21:56 PM

FlashHarry: i assume the pince-nez will return next.


That's cute. I was into bridge piercings with rare-earth magnet pince-nez attachment before it was cool.
 
2014-03-06 03:21:59 PM

naughtyrev: Also, why not bring back the codpiece if you're going to be revisiting old fashions?


i.cdn.turner.com
Too metal for hipsters.
 
2014-03-06 03:22:31 PM
Wearin' a monocle ... that's an eye pokin'.
 
2014-03-06 03:22:46 PM

doublesecretprobation: Pocket Ninja: I need to see some actual photo evidence of New York hipsters wearing monocles in non-costume settings before I'll believe that they're making a return in any real sense.

i'll be in williamsburg this weekend (is that still the hipster capital of the world, or has it moved on to a place i've never heard of?), i'll report back.


Williamsburg is so over, it's now Bushwick aka "South East Williamsburg".

/So long Brooklyn, we hardly knew thee
//At least there's East New York, and the Brighton Beach/Coney Island
 
2014-03-06 03:23:36 PM
Does hipster mean steampunk in NY? Whatever they are called, I too would be happy to engage in some face punching.
 
2014-03-06 03:23:50 PM
www.heyyhotmess.com
 
2014-03-06 03:23:50 PM
www.slapcaption.com
 
2014-03-06 03:25:37 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-06 03:25:57 PM
Prince Nez?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NwvHpGbg3oo


/two squirrel nut zipper posts in a day, oh my
 
2014-03-06 03:27:32 PM
Waiting for prats with spats.
 
2014-03-06 03:27:50 PM
img3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-03-06 03:28:22 PM

FlashHarry: TODAY'S HIPSTER BEATING.
"Today I saw Ethan taking a "food porn" picture of his $10 imported licorice infused latte for his Brooklyn based blog that only his enabling Culdesacian parents read to know their fragile red bearded son is keeping busy on their dime. So I dragged his empty-ketchup-packet shaped body behind the counter and ran him through the coffee bean grinder. End of story."


Thank you so much for this link!
 
2014-03-06 03:28:46 PM
It just means everyone will have to stop being so horrified.
 
2014-03-06 03:29:08 PM
I have the perfect fashion idea for the Hipster; a baseball bat imbedded into the top of their ugly empty skulls.

I'd be more than glad to set up a boutique for this cool trend. I'd charge half price to Hipsters. Hell, I'd pay THEM to allow me to do the procedure.
 
2014-03-06 03:29:34 PM

cowgirl toffee: I wish they would bring back footie pajamas.  :(


I'm a delivery boy in a college town. Trust me, they're totally back. At least, they're back among the drunk, stupid sorority girl with 25 extra pounds crowd. Except, maddeningly, they've taken to calling them "onesies". Stupid hookers.
 
2014-03-06 03:30:28 PM

SurfaceTension: First person I see wearing a monocle gets kicked in the nuts just on principle.


I came in to this thread thinking the law ought to allow for any adult to perform a citizens nut-kick on anyone wearing a monocle in a non-costume setting.
 
2014-03-06 03:30:55 PM

propasaurus: When I was a kid, I started noticing that my eyesight was worse in one eye than the other. Being a kid, I thought that meant I'd have to wear a monocle, so I started practicing how to wear one. Which is why today I can raise one eyebrow.


So, that makes you perfect to be either Colonel Klink or Mr. Spock.

nerdysomething.net www.usafawebguy.com
 
2014-03-06 03:31:09 PM
List fails without spats.

/and now I am feeling ennui.
 
2014-03-06 03:31:51 PM

TV's Vinnie: I have the perfect fashion idea for the Hipster; a baseball bat imbedded into the top of their ugly empty skulls.

I'd be more than glad to set up a boutique for this cool trend. I'd charge half price to Hipsters. Hell, I'd pay THEM to allow me to do the procedure.


Calm down, Bugsy
 
2014-03-06 03:32:07 PM
People who wear glasses usually complain that they have to.  At least they don't have to excercise a squint all day long.

I can't imagine anyone would choose a monocle over glasses.
If it were me, I would get glasses that had one prescription lens, and one that was just glass.
 
2014-03-06 03:32:57 PM
Also, there are a sh*tload of hipsters in this town, including three dudes who may as well be waxed-moustachioed triplets who run a bicycle taxi service--for donations only, of course--and I've not once seen a monocle.
 
2014-03-06 03:32:58 PM

CygnusDarius: Yeah, they're not hipsters.

[www.whitemischief.info image 450x600]


www.mediabistro.com
 
2014-03-06 03:33:00 PM
So Col. Klink was a hipster before his time?
 
2014-03-06 03:33:13 PM

Random Internet Persona: Yeah, because what we need to come back were those super cool plague bird masks.

/*shudder*


Those things would look appropriate on a video game enemy.
Regardless, the article was just another unoriginal "OMG, strawmen hipsters are stupid kerfuflelfuflefufle". I mean, if you're going to go hipster hunting, at least be original and funny, rather than just reuse five stereotypes and claim you're being creative.
 
2014-03-06 03:33:20 PM

Lorelle: Oooh...maybe they'll bring back wearing roach clips with feathers and beads in one's hair.


and ear cuffs.
 
2014-03-06 03:33:41 PM
Someone needs to coin a new word to describe the bewilderment of reading an article and not being able to tell if it came from the Onion or not. The Germans probably already have one.
 
2014-03-06 03:34:16 PM
He was rocking it since the sixties.

beta.images.theglobeandmail.com

Perhaps you heard of him.
 
2014-03-06 03:35:05 PM

FlashHarry: pince-nez


I'm going to go with: The Fez.  I know it's a hat, not glasses, but it seems like the kinda thing hipsters would gravitate to.
 
2014-03-06 03:35:32 PM

TV's Vinnie: propasaurus: When I was a kid, I started noticing that my eyesight was worse in one eye than the other. Being a kid, I thought that meant I'd have to wear a monocle, so I started practicing how to wear one. Which is why today I can raise one eyebrow.

So, that makes you perfect to be either Colonel Klink or Mr. Spock.

 


Came for Colonel Klink, leaving satisfied with bonus of Spock.

+10
 
2014-03-06 03:35:48 PM

Lorelle: FlashHarry: i assume the pince-nez will return next.

A few weeks ago I went to Silver Lake, a hipster-infested L.A. neighborhood, and saw lotsa people wearing huge black-framed glasses, both prescription and sunglasses. I don't recall seeing any monocles or pince-nez glasses, though.


Those chunky black frames have been around for a while now.  Those are some seriously behind-the-times hipsters.
 
2014-03-06 03:36:19 PM
Douchetastic!

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-06 03:37:04 PM
Also:  Penis Gourds.
 
2014-03-06 03:37:36 PM

Needlessly Complicated: List fails without spats.

/and now I am feeling ennui.


poietes.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-03-06 03:37:52 PM

TopoGigo: cowgirl toffee: I wish they would bring back footie pajamas.  :(

I'm a delivery boy in a college town. Trust me, they're totally back. At least, they're back among the drunk, stupid sorority girl with 25 extra pounds crowd. Except, maddeningly, they've taken to calling them "onesies". Stupid hookers.


OMG!  That is so good to hear!  You see.... I always found the concept and mechanics of socks to be too complicated.

I had the same issue with blankets. But now that we have the Snuggie... my life has changed. :P
 
2014-03-06 03:38:11 PM
Quick guide:

Are you Lord Peter Wimsey?

No?

Take off the farking monocle.
 
2014-03-06 03:39:12 PM

busy chillin': Prince Nez?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NwvHpGbg3oo


/two squirrel nut zipper posts in a day, oh my



The weird thing is that squirrel nut zippers had just started playing on my pandora station when I saw the Boobiesing of the album cover today (it was a song from that album too)

Got a thumbs down to get it the fark outta my blues station.

/Strange indeed
 
2014-03-06 03:39:56 PM

2KanZam: busy chillin': Prince Nez?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NwvHpGbg3oo


/two squirrel nut zipper posts in a day, oh my


The weird thing is that squirrel nut zippers had just started playing on my pandora station when I saw the Boobiesing of the album cover today (it was a song from that album too)

Got a thumbs down to get it the fark outta my blues station.

/Strange indeed


^^^meant to say it was the first time I've heard them in years too
 
2014-03-06 03:40:43 PM

Because People in power are Stupid: He was rocking it since the sixties.


[beta.images.theglobeandmail.com image 620x349]


Perhaps you heard of him.



I came here for xylophone playing astronomer cyclops Sir Patrick Moore and can now leave satisfied.

Oh, he was the Gamesmaster too.
spong.com

And was quite good on Just A Minute. I honestly would have loved to have met him while he was still alive. Pity.
 
2014-03-06 03:41:17 PM
As much as the hipster thinks about him/herself and how unique they can be I wonder how much time they spend having sex (because sex is so mainstream and played out).  Just reading about them you'd think sex would take the back burner to fashion, music, art, and personal expression among countless other things.  I'm not going to search the underbelly of the internet, I'm sure hipster sex can be found with rule 43 and all.
 
2014-03-06 03:41:20 PM
This is probably the only Slate article I have ever enjoyed
 
2014-03-06 03:43:14 PM
Omg hipsters r lyke...so dum u guys roflcopter.
 
2014-03-06 03:43:58 PM

nmrsnr: Unless you are a jeweler, there is not purpose to a monocle.

naughtyrev: Also, why not bring back the codpiece if you're going to be revisiting old fashions?

Pfft. Codpiece. Penis gourd is where it's at.


A jewler doesn't use a monocle, a jewler uses a Loop.

and monocles have always been the domain of the douchebag. it was kinda the point
 
2014-03-06 03:44:11 PM
i59.tinypic.com
 
2014-03-06 03:44:27 PM

SurfaceTension: First person I see wearing a monocle gets kicked in the nuts just on principle.


I say...most uncouth of you, dear boy.
 
2014-03-06 03:44:34 PM

LeroyBourne: As much as the hipster thinks about him/herself and how unique they can be I wonder how much time they spend having sex (because sex is so mainstream and played out).  Just reading about them you'd think sex would take the back burner to fashion, music, art, and personal expression among countless other things.  I'm not going to search the underbelly of the internet, I'm sure hipster sex can be found with rule 43 and all.


Hipster porn? hmmmmmm well it has to be there somewhere. Maybe they just have sex for the irony factor.
 
2014-03-06 03:44:49 PM
I would think the big In in fashion would be the girdle for both men and women seeing how farking fat everyone in this country has gotten.
 
2014-03-06 03:47:44 PM

boinkingbill: I would think the big In in fashion would be the girdle for both men and women seeing how farking fat everyone in this country has gotten.


it was gaining popularity when they thought you had said griddle.
 
2014-03-06 03:49:00 PM

naughtyrev: Also, why not bring back the codpiece if you're going to be revisiting old fashions?


They're all the rage at the milk bar.
 
2014-03-06 03:49:01 PM

offmymeds: [www.slapcaption.com image 468x452]


OK. That was freakin' hilarious!
 
2014-03-06 03:49:26 PM

CygnusDarius: Yeah, they're not hipsters.

[www.whitemischief.info image 450x600]


is that a VACUUM TUBE!? Why the hell would a monocole need a vacuum tube? Cyberpunk can be so stupid.
 
2014-03-06 03:50:24 PM

Sybarite: [www.heyyhotmess.com image 500x335]


came for the heathers reference ... leaving satisfied.
 
2014-03-06 03:50:29 PM
I see the sweatpants and wrangler crowds are upset with people who don't dress like them again
 
2014-03-06 03:50:45 PM
That's fake, right? They're not really that stupid, are they?
 
2014-03-06 03:51:54 PM
FTA:
Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label...

WTF is wrong with these people?  I can handle the monocle and the powdered wig, but why on earth would you want to revive the cassette tape?  It was the worst way to store music and it sounds like crap.  Farking idiots.
 
2014-03-06 03:52:34 PM
Another Slate article about something.
a) I just wrote a crappy book; buy it please
b) Listacle of 12 things that take up space
c) Imaginary fashion trends
 
2014-03-06 03:53:54 PM
stupid posers.  Almost every hipster I've seen wearing monocles, and believe me, it's thousands, they're all wearing their monocle over their right eye.  Has no one ever heard "left is right, right is wrong?"
 
2014-03-06 03:54:46 PM
Geddy Lee collects monocles, so they'll never catch on with the hipsters.
 
2014-03-06 03:55:57 PM

FlashHarry: TODAY'S HIPSTER BEATING.
"Today I saw Ethan taking a "food porn" picture of his $10 imported licorice infused latte for his Brooklyn based blog that only his enabling Culdesacian parents read to know their fragile red bearded son is keeping busy on their dime. So I dragged his empty-ketchup-packet shaped body behind the counter and ran him through the coffee bean grinder. End of story."


You know, I now realize something. I loath hipsters. And at the same time I only hate whiny Brooklyners complaining about "gentrification" and pining for the gritty, good old real New York of the 70s, despite the fact that it was a festering shiathole. Of course I've never actually meet a hipster or a Brooklyn Nativist (are all Brooklyners assholes?), and I've only been to NYC on vacation, so it's not really my place to tell.
You know, the Brooklyn Nativist guys kind of sound like hipsters. Their whole thing is that they were in Brooklyn "before it was cool", they proclaim trends over, and they constantly whine about things they don't like. Sounds like a hipster to me.
 
2014-03-06 03:57:10 PM

stupiddream: Geddy Lee collects monocles, so they'll never catch on with the hipsters.


Just another reason why he is the greatest hero on either side of border.
 
2014-03-06 03:58:48 PM

TopoGigo: 'm a delivery boy in a college town. Trust me, they're totally back. At least, they're back among the drunk, stupid sorority girl with 25 extra pounds crowd. Except, maddeningly, they've taken to calling them "onesies". Stupid hookers.


What stupid hookers might look like:

style.mtv.com
 
2014-03-06 03:58:55 PM

p the boiler: I see the sweatpants and wrangler crowds are upset with people who don't dress like them again


NORMCORE 4 LIFE!
 
2014-03-06 03:59:36 PM
i only wear inuit snow blindness preventing glasses

ethnology.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-03-06 03:59:54 PM

Cerebral Knievel: A jewler doesn't use a monocle, a jewler uses a Loop.


It's spelled "loupe," and is it a magnifying device worn on only one eye? Then it's just a fancy monocle.
 
2014-03-06 04:01:26 PM

naughtyrev: "I wore an ombre top bun throughout my 20s, but then the pickler at my co-op was like, 'Didn't I see you in that 30 Seconds to Mars video?' At that point I was like, 'OK: what's next?' " said Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label and can be seen powdering his billowing horsehair wig with arsenic-laden powder in a three-second video posted to the micro experience-sharing app Twine. "Also, I'm balding."

The staggering amount of fail contained within this passage leaves me hoping that it can only be satire.


This... This wasn't from the Onion?
 
2014-03-06 04:01:37 PM

groppet: LeroyBourne: As much as the hipster thinks about him/herself and how unique they can be I wonder how much time they spend having sex (because sex is so mainstream and played out).  Just reading about them you'd think sex would take the back burner to fashion, music, art, and personal expression among countless other things.  I'm not going to search the underbelly of the internet, I'm sure hipster sex can be found with rule 43 and all.

Hipster porn? hmmmmmm well it has to be there somewhere. Maybe they just have sex for the irony factor.


My mind went from a funny anecdote about using the jaws of life to get the skinny jeans off, to just crotchless skinny jeans.  I need a drink now.
 
2014-03-06 04:03:03 PM
Back in 95 there was a regular customer where I worked that wore a monocle, he is in the top three of biggest douches I have ever known.  If you ever had the displeasure of meeting him, within 10 seconds you would think to yourself "Of course, this asshole would be wearing a monocle."
 
2014-03-06 04:06:38 PM

cowgirl toffee: I wish they would bring back footie pajamas.  :(


With the poop chute flap?
 
2014-03-06 04:07:37 PM

Dead for Tax Reasons: i only wear inuit snow blindness preventing glasses

[ethnology.files.wordpress.com image 243x305]


Are you a lesser villain from an 80s movie? The guy who hangs off the main heavy's shoulder and snickers a lot, maybe delivers some line like "That's what we do to punks who try to come on our side of town"?

www.ijaak.com
 
2014-03-06 04:07:57 PM
www.seriouseats.com
am i hip now?
 
2014-03-06 04:08:54 PM

busy chillin': p the boiler: I see the sweatpants and wrangler crowds are upset with people who don't dress like them again

NORMCORE 4 LIFE!



At first I thought you meant  this and I was like "yes"...then I read it again and it appears I'm still one of probably ten people who have that movie.
 
2014-03-06 04:09:25 PM
memeorama.com
 
2014-03-06 04:10:01 PM

naughtyrev: "I wore an ombre top bun throughout my 20s, but then the pickler at my co-op was like, 'Didn't I see you in that 30 Seconds to Mars video?' At that point I was like, 'OK: what's next?' " said Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label and can be seen powdering his billowing horsehair wig with arsenic-laden powder in a three-second video posted to the micro experience-sharing app Twine. "Also, I'm balding."

The staggering amount of fail contained within this passage leaves me hoping that it can only be satire.


I've got great news for you, my reading comprehension lackluster friend: it, the piece, is, in fact, satire.
 
2014-03-06 04:10:01 PM
img4.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-03-06 04:11:45 PM
Funny, I've not read this thread yet, but I was thinking the other day removeable collars should be making a come back right about now. And I didn't even know about the monocle thingy.
 
2014-03-06 04:12:01 PM

Dr Dreidel: Needlessly Complicated: List fails without spats.

/and now I am feeling ennui.

[poietes.files.wordpress.com image 422x500]


I'm sitting at my desk giggling about this...
 
2014-03-06 04:12:31 PM

Lorelle: FlashHarry: i assume the pince-nez will return next.

A few weeks ago I went to Silver Lake, a hipster-infested L.A. neighborhood, and saw lotsa people wearing huge black-framed glasses, both prescription and sunglasses. I don't recall seeing any monocles or pince-nez glasses, though.


There was some pretty chunky black eye wear on display at the oscars as well. Marty and Beth Scorsasie really pulled them off the best in a Jewish Grandmother kind of way.
 
2014-03-06 04:13:05 PM
and can the women hipsters dress like this, please?
img.fark.net
 
2014-03-06 04:13:29 PM
i1.mirror.co.uk
 
gja [TotalFark]
2014-03-06 04:14:53 PM

sethen320: FTA:
Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label...

WTF is wrong with these people?  I can handle the monocle and the powdered wig, but why on earth would you want to revive the cassette tape?  It was the worst way to store music and it sounds like crap.  Farking idiots.


Magnetic tape is, in some ways, worse than vinyl records.
Carefully stored a vinyl record will not degrade unless played with a contact stylus (there are laser readers that do not touch the record, FYI).
A tape will degrade just sitting there. It's unavoidable and unstoppable. It's physics. You cannot stop it.
 
2014-03-06 04:14:59 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-06 04:15:03 PM

sethen320: busy chillin': p the boiler: I see the sweatpants and wrangler crowds are upset with people who don't dress like them again

NORMCORE 4 LIFE!


At first I thought you meant  this and I was like "yes"...then I read it again and it appears I'm still one of probably ten people who have that movie.


nope, not that.

Just a new trend with hipsters of dressing like normal people. There was an article about it last week or so.
 
2014-03-06 04:15:18 PM

cowgirl toffee: I wish they would bring back footie pajamas.  :(


I bought my daughter a set at Target last Christmas (adult sized ones, she's a teen), so they have them.
 
2014-03-06 04:18:07 PM

gja: sethen320: FTA:
Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label...

WTF is wrong with these people?  I can handle the monocle and the powdered wig, but why on earth would you want to revive the cassette tape?  It was the worst way to store music and it sounds like crap.  Farking idiots.

Magnetic tape is, in some ways, worse than vinyl records.
Carefully stored a vinyl record will not degrade unless played with a contact stylus (there are laser readers that do not touch the record, FYI).
A tape will degrade just sitting there. It's unavoidable and unstoppable. It's physics. You cannot stop it.


I have always hated magnetic tape.  The range is ridiculous and the sound is soft.  I've heard other stories of people trying to keep tape alive and I could never wrap my head around why anyone would ever do that.  I can understand the case for vinyl.  The sound is bright and crisp if you can handle the minor pops which come up.  But tape?  Muddy shiat sound.

I have never heard of the laser readers.  I'm going to look into that now.  Thanks.
 
2014-03-06 04:18:12 PM
minionslovebananas.com
 
2014-03-06 04:18:13 PM

busy chillin': Just a new trend with hipsters of dressing like normal people. There was an article about it last week or so.


Google up "normcore".  I'm not sure if it's a big joke or not.  It's getting harder to tell.
 
2014-03-06 04:18:42 PM

busy chillin': nope, not that.

Just a new trend with hipsters of dressing like normal people. There was an article about it last week or so.


OMG! They could be sitting right nect to you, and you wouldn't even know it! This is horrible!
 
2014-03-06 04:19:55 PM

redsquid: Someone needs to coin a new word to describe the bewilderment of reading an article and not being able to tell if it came from the Onion or not. The Germans probably already have one.


Poe's_law : "The core of Poe's law is that a parody of something extreme by nature becomes impossible to differentiate from sincere extremism "
 
2014-03-06 04:23:19 PM

manbart: busy chillin': nope, not that.

Just a new trend with hipsters of dressing like normal people. There was an article about it last week or so.

OMG! They could be sitting right nect to you, and you wouldn't even know it! This is horrible!


no. they will tell you.

I really don't care about hipsters or not, just commenting on the new fashion trend. Or whatever. Just be yourself. And if you want to wear a monocle then knock yourself out.
 
2014-03-06 04:24:07 PM
knock yourself out


LULZ
 
2014-03-06 04:24:54 PM

Fano: naughtyrev: "I wore an ombre top bun throughout my 20s, but then the pickler at my co-op was like, 'Didn't I see you in that 30 Seconds to Mars video?' At that point I was like, 'OK: what's next?' " said Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label and can be seen powdering his billowing horsehair wig with arsenic-laden powder in a three-second video posted to the micro experience-sharing app Twine. "Also, I'm balding."

The staggering amount of fail contained within this passage leaves me hoping that it can only be satire.

This... This wasn't from the Onion?


No, the Onion is funny.
 
2014-03-06 04:25:16 PM
Feel free to bring back hip hugging bell bottomed skin tight blue jeans and leather halter tops with fringes for the ladies any damned day now.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2014-03-06 04:26:58 PM

sethen320: gja: sethen320: FTA:
Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label...

WTF is wrong with these people?  I can handle the monocle and the powdered wig, but why on earth would you want to revive the cassette tape?  It was the worst way to store music and it sounds like crap.  Farking idiots.

Magnetic tape is, in some ways, worse than vinyl records.
Carefully stored a vinyl record will not degrade unless played with a contact stylus (there are laser readers that do not touch the record, FYI).
A tape will degrade just sitting there. It's unavoidable and unstoppable. It's physics. You cannot stop it.

I have always hated magnetic tape.  The range is ridiculous and the sound is soft.  I've heard other stories of people trying to keep tape alive and I could never wrap my head around why anyone would ever do that.  I can understand the case for vinyl.  The sound is bright and crisp if you can handle the minor pops which come up.  But tape?  Muddy shiat sound.

I have never heard of the laser readers.  I'm going to look into that now.  Thanks.


Don't have a rectal prolapse at the price$.
 
2014-03-06 04:27:18 PM

busy chillin': manbart: busy chillin': nope, not that.

Just a new trend with hipsters of dressing like normal people. There was an article about it last week or so.

OMG! They could be sitting right nect to you, and you wouldn't even know it! This is horrible!

no. they will tell you.

I really don't care about hipsters or not, just commenting on the new fashion trend. Or whatever. Just be yourself. And if you want to wear a monocle then knock yourself out.


Possibly with a vintage 1890's artisinal hammer.
 
2014-03-06 04:28:36 PM
Somebody at slate is phoning it in today.
 
2014-03-06 04:30:20 PM
TFA was boring and pointless.

But the article linked in the sidebar was priceless:

Cheeto Looks Like Masturbating Man (PHOTO)
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/03/05/cheeto-masturbating-man-pho to _n_4907199.html?view=print
(Slightly NSFW)
 
2014-03-06 04:30:52 PM

kimwim: Funny, I've not read this thread yet, but I was thinking the other day removeable collars should be making a come back right about now. And I didn't even know about the monocle thingy.


They've been a staple of the BDSM community for a while now. :p
 
2014-03-06 04:30:59 PM

gja: sethen320: gja: sethen320: FTA:
Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label...

WTF is wrong with these people?  I can handle the monocle and the powdered wig, but why on earth would you want to revive the cassette tape?  It was the worst way to store music and it sounds like crap.  Farking idiots.

Magnetic tape is, in some ways, worse than vinyl records.
Carefully stored a vinyl record will not degrade unless played with a contact stylus (there are laser readers that do not touch the record, FYI).
A tape will degrade just sitting there. It's unavoidable and unstoppable. It's physics. You cannot stop it.

I have always hated magnetic tape.  The range is ridiculous and the sound is soft.  I've heard other stories of people trying to keep tape alive and I could never wrap my head around why anyone would ever do that.  I can understand the case for vinyl.  The sound is bright and crisp if you can handle the minor pops which come up.  But tape?  Muddy shiat sound.

I have never heard of the laser readers.  I'm going to look into that now.  Thanks.

Don't have a rectal prolapse at the price$.


Yeah...I thought 4 digits at the most.  So I was wrong.  I'll just pass on that.
 
2014-03-06 04:31:04 PM
Gay
 
2014-03-06 04:35:46 PM

Gentoolive: Gay


Did you get lost on your way to the YouTube comments section?
 
2014-03-06 04:35:47 PM

Needlessly Complicated: List fails without spats.

/and now I am feeling ennui.


I spat upon you. Does not this make you feel better
 
2014-03-06 04:36:09 PM

Because People in power are Stupid: He was rocking it since the sixties.

[beta.images.theglobeandmail.com image 620x349]

Perhaps you heard of him.


cat, monocle

Bond villain?
 
2014-03-06 04:37:22 PM
No Buzz Killington pictures?
 
2014-03-06 04:38:16 PM
Damn these young people with their thrift, self-sufficiency, appreciation for the arts, trade skills and unconventional fashions!
 
2014-03-06 04:38:52 PM

busy chillin': TV's Vinnie: I have the perfect fashion idea for the Hipster; a baseball bat imbedded into the top of their ugly empty skulls.

I'd be more than glad to set up a boutique for this cool trend. I'd charge half price to Hipsters. Hell, I'd pay THEM to allow me to do the procedure.

Calm down, Bugsy


Yes, but before you know it the surviving hipsters would search out a trendy, exclusive skull-crusher that you have probably never heard of.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2014-03-06 04:42:07 PM

sethen320: gja: sethen320: gja: sethen320: FTA:
Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label...

WTF is wrong with these people?  I can handle the monocle and the powdered wig, but why on earth would you want to revive the cassette tape?  It was the worst way to store music and it sounds like crap.  Farking idiots.

Magnetic tape is, in some ways, worse than vinyl records.
Carefully stored a vinyl record will not degrade unless played with a contact stylus (there are laser readers that do not touch the record, FYI).
A tape will degrade just sitting there. It's unavoidable and unstoppable. It's physics. You cannot stop it.

I have always hated magnetic tape.  The range is ridiculous and the sound is soft.  I've heard other stories of people trying to keep tape alive and I could never wrap my head around why anyone would ever do that.  I can understand the case for vinyl.  The sound is bright and crisp if you can handle the minor pops which come up.  But tape?  Muddy shiat sound.

I have never heard of the laser readers.  I'm going to look into that now.  Thanks.

Don't have a rectal prolapse at the price$.

Yeah...I thought 4 digits at the most.  So I was wrong.  I'll just pass on that.


Yup. Cool as hell and they really do the job. But those prices are a tough swallow.
 
2014-03-06 04:43:33 PM
Ten trends in one.

lh3.googleusercontent.com
 
2014-03-06 04:46:52 PM

Dragonflew: CygnusDarius: Yeah, they're not hipsters.

[www.whitemischief.info image 450x600]

is that a VACUUM TUBE!? Why the hell would a monocole need a vacuum tube? Cyberpunk can be so stupid.


Monocle, not monocole. Steampunk, not cyberpunk. I can't internet today.
 
2014-03-06 04:52:45 PM

Bane of Broone: They've been a staple of the BDSM community for a while now. :p


OK, I laughed at that.
Although most of them are padlocked.
 
2014-03-06 04:52:58 PM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: So you could say it's a ... Mr. Peanut cluster?


Done in two.
 
2014-03-06 04:56:01 PM
img2.wikia.nocookie.net

The only monocle I'd wear.

/And I'd let Vasquez handle my smart gun any day.
 
2014-03-06 05:05:35 PM

Because People in power are Stupid: He was rocking it since the sixties.

[beta.images.theglobeandmail.com image 620x349]

Perhaps you heard of him.


I hear he plays a mean xylophone.
 
2014-03-06 05:07:18 PM

udhq: Damn these young people with their thrift, self-sufficiency, appreciation for the arts, trade skills and unconventional fashions!

desperate cries for attention.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2014-03-06 05:13:05 PM

gunther_bumpass: udhq: Damn these young people with their thrift, self-sufficiency, appreciation for the arts, trade skills and unconventional fashions! desperate cries for attention.


::::snerk:::::
 
2014-03-06 05:13:07 PM
Being featured on NYT kills off any trend. I am glad they got so far ahead of this one.
 
2014-03-06 05:14:44 PM
Come on, Self inflicted gunshot wounds...
 
2014-03-06 05:15:58 PM

udhq: Damn these young people with their thrift, self-sufficiency, appreciation for the arts, trade skills and unconventional fashions!


Uh...no.
 
2014-03-06 05:20:51 PM

miss diminutive: It just means everyone will have to stop being so horrified.


These two learned that lesson, the hard way.

24.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-03-06 05:20:58 PM

antron:


*shakes tiny fist*
 
2014-03-06 05:26:24 PM

Lee451: Needlessly Complicated: List fails without spats.

/and now I am feeling ennui.

I spat upon you. Does not this make you feel better


That wasn't very funny. Your wordplay was pretty obvious and so it fell flat. Don't get me wrong, you haven't offended me personally, but it offends me as someone who appreciates cleverness. I mean, really, dude? Try harder next time. Also, was that even in English?

/wow
 
2014-03-06 05:29:13 PM
Well, he's not wearing a monocle, but this is my favorite one.

theconservativetreehouse.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-03-06 05:30:59 PM
myeyelab.com
Penguin farts in your direction.
 
2014-03-06 05:31:54 PM
One Part Plague Doctor, One Part Hipster Chic:Maris Norwich, a British trend forecaster, credits the proliferation of old-tyme bird masks to what he calls "the new pseudoscientists," a hipster subspecies who have been adding meticulously sharpened beaks-often filled with aromatic wildflowers to ward off the stench of death-to their hand-crafted cloaks and distressed pocket bloodletting instruments. "In a time of unprecedented scientific knowledge, it's a romantic callback to the artisanal ignorance of Medieval medical professionals who didn't understand what germs were," Mr. Norwich said. "You see plague doctor chic surfacing in Berlin, parts of Orlando."

I fully endorse this one. Just the right mix of goofiness and the macabre.
 
2014-03-06 05:39:14 PM
suspenders.  I'm calling it.
 
2014-03-06 05:40:24 PM

gunther_bumpass: udhq: Damn these young people with their thrift, self-sufficiency, appreciation for the arts, trade skills and unconventional fashions! desperate cries for attention.


Yes, everyone doing anything unusual is simply playing for your approval.....  That's not your out of control, delusional ego talking at all.....
 
gja [TotalFark]
2014-03-06 05:40:24 PM

Plant Rights Activist: suspenders.  I'm calling it.


Nope. Never went out of style.
 
2014-03-06 05:41:27 PM

sethen320: udhq: Damn these young people with their thrift, self-sufficiency, appreciation for the arts, trade skills and unconventional fashions!

Uh...no.


Know how I know you don't know any actual hipsters?
 
2014-03-06 05:47:21 PM

sethen320: gja: sethen320: FTA:
Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label...

WTF is wrong with these people?  I can handle the monocle and the powdered wig, but why on earth would you want to revive the cassette tape?  It was the worst way to store music and it sounds like crap.  Farking idiots.

Magnetic tape is, in some ways, worse than vinyl records.
Carefully stored a vinyl record will not degrade unless played with a contact stylus (there are laser readers that do not touch the record, FYI).
A tape will degrade just sitting there. It's unavoidable and unstoppable. It's physics. You cannot stop it.

I have always hated magnetic tape.  The range is ridiculous and the sound is soft.  I've heard other stories of people trying to keep tape alive and I could never wrap my head around why anyone would ever do that.  I can understand the case for vinyl.  The sound is bright and crisp if you can handle the minor pops which come up.  But tape?  Muddy shiat sound.

I have never heard of the laser readers.  I'm going to look into that now.  Thanks.


Those new-fangled laser readers for music? Back in my day, boy, we called them Compact Disks.
 
2014-03-06 05:54:17 PM

udhq: sethen320: udhq: Damn these young people with their thrift, self-sufficiency, appreciation for the arts, trade skills and unconventional fashions!

Uh...no.

Know how I know you don't know any actual hipsters?


Maybe we just don't know the same ones.  The ones I know of spend a ton of money trying to look like they don't.  It happens in the way of clothing, rent, and home decorating.  It's possible that we're both generalizing based on our own experiences and assuming incorrectly.  Just a thought.

Or we could sit here and argue about "my hipsters are more/less cool than your hipsters", this being the internet and all.
 
2014-03-06 06:03:58 PM

udhq: gunther_bumpass: udhq: Damn these young people with their thrift, self-sufficiency, appreciation for the arts, trade skills and unconventional fashions! desperate cries for attention.

Yes, everyone doing anything unusual is simply playing for your approval.....  That's not your out of control, delusional ego talking at all.....


no YOU are.
 
2014-03-06 06:08:06 PM
Hipsters are still preferable to rednecks. In fact, there are a lot of people who are way more annoying than hipsters.

But that's only my opinion.
 
2014-03-06 06:10:35 PM

gja: Plant Rights Activist: suspenders.  I'm calling it.

Nope. Never went out of style.


^Seconded.
I can't think of a subculture in the last 30 years that didn't embrace (pun intended) suspenders in some form or another: Punk, Goth, Hiphop, Ska, Grunge, Rave, New Wave, Hardcore.
 
2014-03-06 06:46:36 PM

antron:


I came for a pic of this but a gif is so much better!

+100


"We die".
 
2014-03-06 07:00:56 PM

cowgirl toffee: I wish they would bring back footie pajamas.  :(


I already brought those back.
/not a hipster.
 
2014-03-06 07:41:56 PM

Ayn Rand's Social Worker: cowgirl toffee: I wish they would bring back footie pajamas.  :(

I already brought those back.
/not a hipster.


*giggles*
 
2014-03-06 08:05:22 PM

Needlessly Complicated: Lee451: Needlessly Complicated: List fails without spats.

/and now I am feeling ennui.

I spat upon you. Does not this make you feel better

That wasn't very funny. Your wordplay was pretty obvious and so it fell flat. Don't get me wrong, you haven't offended me personally, but it offends me as someone who appreciates cleverness. I mean, really, dude? Try harder next time. Also, was that even in English?

/wow


Who smudged your monocle?
 
2014-03-06 08:13:25 PM

obamadidcoke: Somebody at slate is phoning it in today everyday.


FTFY
 
2014-03-06 08:44:15 PM

nmrsnr: Cerebral Knievel: A jewler doesn't use a monocle, a jewler uses a Loop.

It's spelled "loupe," and is it a magnifying device worn on only one eye? Then it's just a fancy monocle.


that's fine.. sorry for the mispelling.. but, a LOUPE is used to magnify, as in over the powers of x2 to x10.. it's used to make really little shiat look bigger so that you may examine it more closely.. a monocle in the sense of this topic is a singlur corrective lens.
Actual Biocular corrective eyeware predate monocles.. monocles were made to be decorative items, they were suspended on fob chains, there were meant to be seen as well to be see with. A Jewler would more likely MAKE a monocle, than USE one. and unless your eyesight was that straight up buggered in one eye, a monocle would be woefully inadiequte and would more likely fark up your vision rather than correct it.
 
2014-03-06 08:50:16 PM
Lorelle
Solid State Vittles: Lorelle: Solid State Vittles: A friend and I have been proposing for years now that a good hipster trend would be tricked-out crutches.
[cdn2.bigcommerce.com image 700x700]
It's important to mention that the user of said crutches should not be injured.
Also, thick black glasses frames have been hipster de rigueur for at least a decade now.
I know, but the really huge frames seem to be a more recent trend.


I am sure the thick black frames have crossed over into popular culture and any true hipster is way past that look.
 
2014-03-06 09:24:04 PM

CygnusDarius: Yeah, they're not hipsters.

[www.whitemischief.info image 450x600]


Usually some sort of eyewear would deter me from wanting to punch someone in the face.
Not in this case.
 
Boe
2014-03-06 09:26:43 PM

naughtyrev: "I wore an ombre top bun throughout my 20s, but then the pickler at my co-op was like, 'Didn't I see you in that 30 Seconds to Mars video?' At that point I was like, 'OK: what's next?' " said Jude Loving, who runs his own cassette-only music label and can be seen powdering his billowing horsehair wig with arsenic-laden powder in a three-second video posted to the micro experience-sharing app Twine. "Also, I'm balding."

The staggering amount of fail contained within this passage leaves me hoping that it can only be satire.


You can't make this shiat up.
 
2014-03-06 10:09:53 PM

MythDragon: [img2.wikia.nocookie.net image 397x376]

The only monocle I'd wear.

/And I'd let Vasquez handle my smart gun any day.


Then one scene where she's testing her gun, the scene when they're about to land on the colony for the first time?.

That's the moment I knew I liked women.
 
2014-03-06 10:55:54 PM

CygnusDarius: MythDragon: [img2.wikia.nocookie.net image 397x376]

The only monocle I'd wear.

/And I'd let Vasquez handle my smart gun any day.

Then one scene where she's testing her gun, the scene when they're about to land on the colony for the first time?.

That's the moment I knew I liked women.



Are you sure you didn't confuse her for a man?


i kid, of course.
 
2014-03-06 11:00:11 PM

busy chillin': manbart: busy chillin': nope, not that.

Just a new trend with hipsters of dressing like normal people. There was an article about it last week or so.

OMG! They could be sitting right nect to you, and you wouldn't even know it! This is horrible!

no. they will tell you.

I really don't care about hipsters or not, just commenting on the new fashion trend. Or whatever. Just be yourself. And if you want to wear a monocle then knock yourself out.


The frightening part about this is I was in a bar in Bushwick last night (don't judge me - I was on my way home which is a few blocks from Bushwick, and they serve food late at that bar) and people were talking about normcore.  I tried to get clarification if wearing pleated khakis with a blue shirt and white sneakers was a subversive act of extremely aggressive normal-core or if it just meant I was an upper-middle-class kid from north Jersey dressing like my dad.

I did not make any friends.
 
2014-03-06 11:33:58 PM
N-deutetrei
The frightening part about this is I was in a bar in Bushwick last night (don't judge me - I was on my way home which is a few blocks from Bushwick, and they serve food late at that bar) and people were talking about normcore. I tried to get clarification if wearing pleated khakis with a blue shirt and white sneakers was a subversive act of extremely aggressive normal-core or if it just meant I was an upper-middle-class kid from north Jersey dressing like my dad.
I did not make any friends.


Per a fashion guy on a huffpo video it is a purposeful blank non-descript anti-fashion to just mix in.

And how does an IT worker wearing brown shoes, camel khakis and a dark blue polo as his work uniform differ from a hipster wearing that same normcore set of clothing?

I have no f*cking idea.
 
2014-03-07 01:06:40 AM
CSB

I was offered fashion advice from a gay guy the other day at work. When I saw he was wearing a sweater vest, bow tie, and horn rimmed glasses I politely declined.

Just because everyone in your soy-latte-of-the-month-club is wearing it doesn't mean it looks good.

/CSB

/looked very similiar to this guy:
i186.photobucket.com
 
2014-03-07 04:57:43 AM

groppet: LeroyBourne: As much as the hipster thinks about him/herself and how unique they can be I wonder how much time they spend having sex (because sex is so mainstream and played out).  Just reading about them you'd think sex would take the back burner to fashion, music, art, and personal expression among countless other things.  I'm not going to search the underbelly of the internet, I'm sure hipster sex can be found with rule 43 and all.

Hipster porn? hmmmmmm well it has to be there somewhere. Maybe they just have sex for the irony factor.


I am somewhat sad to admit my friend actually has a hipster porn collective. http://pornosecproductions.com/
 
2014-03-07 09:44:18 AM

antron: [i59.tinypic.com image 402x240]

i1.ytimg.com
 
2014-03-07 02:51:42 PM
i.imgur.com
 
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