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(The Smoking Gun)   Man attacks sister after she complains that he leaves the toilet seat up. Cops tell him to put a lid on it   (thesmokinggun.com) divider line 150
    More: Dumbass  
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2663 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Mar 2014 at 11:04 AM (19 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



150 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-03-06 09:39:50 AM
Dude, just don't lift it in the first place.  Problem solved.
 
2014-03-06 09:56:28 AM
Has she ever given one thought to not leaving it down?
 
2014-03-06 10:14:41 AM
Carpet the toilet like my grandma did, the seat never stays up now matter what.


blogfiles.wfmu.org
 
2014-03-06 10:41:21 AM
What a pisser.

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-03-06 11:07:17 AM

stpauler: Carpet the toilet like my grandma did, the seat never stays up now matter what.


[blogfiles.wfmu.org image 436x640]


cawk catcher
 
2014-03-06 11:08:19 AM
Put a lid on it? What's that you say?
 
2014-03-06 11:09:08 AM
www.agencynewbusiness.com

"Put the seat down, man. It'd be a lot Kohler if you did."
 
2014-03-06 11:10:46 AM
We've all been there.
 
2014-03-06 11:10:59 AM
Chicks are stupid about this.  If you really want us to leave it down we will, but then it is going to get pissed all over.
 
2014-03-06 11:11:15 AM
stpauler
Carpet the toilet like my grandma did, the seat never stays up now matter what.


Hate padded toilet seats. It's like taking a crap on the couch.
 
2014-03-06 11:13:21 AM
I'd rather my husband lift it and leave it up than piss on the damn seat...
 
2014-03-06 11:14:09 AM
Man attacks sister after she complains that he leaves the toilet seat up. Cops tell him to put a lid on it

-made me laugh
 
gja [TotalFark]
2014-03-06 11:14:37 AM

ga362: stpauler
Carpet the toilet like my grandma did, the seat never stays up now matter what.

Hate padded toilet seats. It's like taking a crap on the couch.


LOL. Effing awesome analogy. Please allow me to recycle that one in the future.
 
2014-03-06 11:14:38 AM
I've never understood why this is such a hang up with women.

Being a male, and having grown up with only a brother, I have frequently come into the bathroom needing to shiat, but found the seat up. Now maybe this doesn't occur to women, but when faced with this situation I put the seat down myself. Problem solved!

I must admit that on a few rare occasions when I wasn't paying attention, I started to sit without first lowering the seat. On these occasions I chuckled at my own carelessness and thought, "Danfrank you dumbass, look before you sit." I never went into a rage that my brother (or maybe me) had left the seat up.

Am I missing something?
 
2014-03-06 11:15:48 AM
She's lucky he lifts the seat up at all. Judging by the toilets at work, a lot of guys just like pissing over the seat.
 
2014-03-06 11:16:13 AM

BiffDangler: Chicks are stupid about this.  If you really want us to leave it down we will, but then it is going to get pissed all over.


Women manage to piss on the underside of the seat. I don't understand how but I know it to be true. I'm ok with cleaning the bathroom if she will just acknowledge that she is every bit as nasty as I am in the bathroom if not more.
 
2014-03-06 11:17:19 AM

ga362: stpauler
Carpet the toilet like my grandma did, the seat never stays up now matter what.

Hate padded toilet seats. It's like taking a crap on the couch.


i61.tinypic.com
 
2014-03-06 11:17:34 AM

danfrank: I've never understood why this is such a hang up with women.

Being a male, and having grown up with only a brother, I have frequently come into the bathroom needing to shiat, but found the seat up. Now maybe this doesn't occur to women, but when faced with this situation I put the seat down myself. Problem solved!

I must admit that on a few rare occasions when I wasn't paying attention, I started to sit without first lowering the seat. On these occasions I chuckled at my own carelessness and thought, "Danfrank you dumbass, look before you sit." I never went into a rage that my brother (or maybe me) had left the seat up.

Am I missing something?


Or you can just sit when you go pee. Makes things easier on everyone.
 
2014-03-06 11:19:59 AM

danfrank: I've never understood why this is such a hang up with women.

Being a male, and having grown up with only a brother, I have frequently come into the bathroom needing to shiat, but found the seat up. Now maybe this doesn't occur to women, but when faced with this situation I put the seat down myself. Problem solved!

I must admit that on a few rare occasions when I wasn't paying attention, I started to sit without first lowering the seat. On these occasions I chuckled at my own carelessness and thought, "Danfrank you dumbass, look before you sit." I never went into a rage that my brother (or maybe me) had left the seat up.

Am I missing something?


Pretty much my thoughts on the subject. Although having been in a few relationships where the S.O. would complain about me leaving the seat up, I've just gotten into the habit of putting the seat and the lid down. The ones that complained about the lid also being down, I knew then were petty biatches and the ones who didn't I knew were not.
 
2014-03-06 11:21:06 AM

Omis: Or you can just sit when you go pee. Makes things easier on everyone.


Oh, now you did it.

gifrific.com
 
2014-03-06 11:22:33 AM

danfrank: I've never understood why this is such a hang up with women.


Their little brains just can't handle the intricacies of complex contraptions like toilet seats. If it isn't a tool for cooking or cleaning, they just can't understand it.
 
2014-03-06 11:22:36 AM

Omis: danfrank: I've never understood why this is such a hang up with women.

Being a male, and having grown up with only a brother, I have frequently come into the bathroom needing to shiat, but found the seat up. Now maybe this doesn't occur to women, but when faced with this situation I put the seat down myself. Problem solved!

I must admit that on a few rare occasions when I wasn't paying attention, I started to sit without first lowering the seat. On these occasions I chuckled at my own carelessness and thought, "Danfrank you dumbass, look before you sit." I never went into a rage that my brother (or maybe me) had left the seat up.

Am I missing something?

Or you can just sit when you go pee. Makes things easier on everyone.


Unless you think standing is "easier". None of it (sitting, standing, lifting or lowering a seat) is really difficult of course, which is my general point. But some women turn it into WWIII for some reason.
 
2014-03-06 11:22:37 AM
It takes two seconds to return the toilet to the condition you found it in.
 
2014-03-06 11:23:14 AM

Omis: Or you can just sit when you go pee. Makes things easier on everyone.


I do this at work, why rush in and out when I'm getting paid to sit and piss.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2014-03-06 11:23:41 AM
I never have to lift the seat. I always wait until I have to "run production for both lines" as it were.
So I sit down. Sometimes with the finance page or forex numbers. I leave both cells in my office because it is the only time I get to not be bothered. Also, do not try to talk to me during this function.
If you are above me in the org I will politely say "not now please, bad time".
If you're my equal "STFU".
If you work for me "STFU, GTFO or you're fired"

Seriously. Some toilet etiquette for pity's sake.
 
2014-03-06 11:23:57 AM
If men can lift up the seat then women can put down the seat.
Before you rant about a closed lid prevent fecal matters from escaping when you flush.
Myths Buster proved that it make no difference whether the lid was opened or closed, the same amount of shiats matters in the air is the same.
 
2014-03-06 11:24:11 AM

The My Little Pony Killer: It takes two seconds to return the toilet to the condition you found it in.


So a woman should return it to "up" if that's how she finds it?
 
2014-03-06 11:24:55 AM

danfrank: The My Little Pony Killer: It takes two seconds to return the toilet to the condition you found it in.

So a woman should return it to "up" if that's how she finds it?


It would mean the man didn't do his part in returning it to the position he found it in...
 
2014-03-06 11:26:23 AM
I never understood this.

I look before I go to the bathroom. If the seat's down I lift it up. Same goes for the lid.

Can't females do the same? simply look before you sit?
 
2014-03-06 11:26:30 AM

The My Little Pony Killer: danfrank: The My Little Pony Killer: It takes two seconds to return the toilet to the condition you found it in.

So a woman should return it to "up" if that's how she finds it?

It would mean the man didn't do his part in returning it to the position he found it in...


It also means that it takes two seconds to put the toilet in the condition you want it in. Christ, it is just a farking toilet seat. Put it down yourself if that is where you farking want it.
 
2014-03-06 11:26:31 AM

The My Little Pony Killer: danfrank: The My Little Pony Killer: It takes two seconds to return the toilet to the condition you found it in.

So a woman should return it to "up" if that's how she finds it?

It would mean the man didn't do his part in returning it to the position he found it in...


What if the women got done cleaning the toliet and left the seat up so it was in fact in the last place that the women left it.
 
gja [TotalFark]
2014-03-06 11:27:28 AM

The My Little Pony Killer: It takes two seconds to return the toilet to the condition you found it in.


This, too. Do peoples arms suddenly break from shaking their penis?
/only if you're Holmes or the like, i suppose
 
2014-03-06 11:27:36 AM

umad: danfrank: I've never understood why this is such a hang up with women.

Their little brains just can't handle the intricacies of complex contraptions like toilet seats. If it isn't a tool for cooking or cleaning, they just can't understand it.


Exactly this. They're not quite smart enough to figure out how to put the toilet seat down themselves. Maybe if it had a frying pan handle attached to it.....?
 
2014-03-06 11:30:06 AM

The My Little Pony Killer: danfrank: The My Little Pony Killer: It takes two seconds to return the toilet to the condition you found it in.

So a woman should return it to "up" if that's how she finds it?

It would mean the man didn't do his part in returning it to the position he found it in...


I disagree with your assertion that a man has "part" here...above and beyond aiming well of course. As you said, it only takes two seconds...so why not just lower the damn thing before you sit?

To be honest, I try to lower it every time, but sometimes I forget. On those occasions, I don't need a lecture about it from someone that can't look before they sit down.
 
2014-03-06 11:30:27 AM
I just put the seat down, do my business, wash my hands, and leave. I've also not understood why women need to biatch about it.
 
2014-03-06 11:30:29 AM

gja: The My Little Pony Killer: It takes two seconds to return the toilet to the condition you found it in.

This, too. Do peoples arms suddenly break from shaking their penis?
/only if you're Holmes or the like, i suppose


Do you need us to wipe your ass for you as well, Princess? God forbid you have to spend half a second putting the seat down. THE HORROR!!!
 
2014-03-06 11:30:49 AM
southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com
 
2014-03-06 11:30:52 AM
Get one of these. The seat/lid will nevermore be an issue.

www.talesfromanexpat.com

I bet Asians don't have to deal with these stupid arguments.
 
2014-03-06 11:31:28 AM

danfrank: I've never understood why this is such a hang up with women.

Am I missing something?


It's all about the trade off.  You hand in your man card and you spend the rest of your life peeing sitting down, or you fight it?  Of course there are legit times for a male to sit and pee.  At 4 am you wake up to piss, sitting is fine, you're tired.  You are so wasted that standing isn't an option.  Or you could just tell to woman that you'll put the seat down when you're done.  Hell, I wash my hands every time I use the bathroom, I don't see the big deal.
 
2014-03-06 11:32:45 AM
I always close the lid to piss off everyone
 
2014-03-06 11:33:53 AM

umad: gja: The My Little Pony Killer: It takes two seconds to return the toilet to the condition you found it in.

This, too. Do peoples arms suddenly break from shaking their penis?
/only if you're Holmes or the like, i suppose

Do you need us to wipe your ass for you as well, Princess? God forbid you have to spend half a second putting the seat down. THE HORROR!!!


What if some sick @sshole left a turd in the toilet and then you had to leave another one?... now what?
Does the "return the toilet to the condition you found it in " apply?  :/
 
2014-03-06 11:38:52 AM
Puting the seat down is a common courtesy.  However ladies, you don't need to go bait shiat about it when it doesn't happen.
 
2014-03-06 11:39:12 AM

Omis: danfrank: I've never understood why this is such a hang up with women.

Being a male, and having grown up with only a brother, I have frequently come into the bathroom needing to shiat, but found the seat up. Now maybe this doesn't occur to women, but when faced with this situation I put the seat down myself. Problem solved!

I must admit that on a few rare occasions when I wasn't paying attention, I started to sit without first lowering the seat. On these occasions I chuckled at my own carelessness and thought, "Danfrank you dumbass, look before you sit." I never went into a rage that my brother (or maybe me) had left the seat up.

Am I missing something?

Or you can just sit when you go pee. Makes things easier on everyone.


Approves:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=54t0iyp_udc&feature=kp
 
2014-03-06 11:39:55 AM

Summoner101: I always close the lid to piss off everyone


I started doing that after I moved in with my GF*

One thing I won't get, though, is the "fall in" argument. Somehow girls and women can magically fall in the toilet but guys never do (or use that argument?). Two things: turn the f*cking light on and make sure the seat is down. Speaking for myself, the number of times where I've *had* to go 2 versus 1 leans toward the former, so timeliness isn't an argument as far as I can tell either.

*the pettiness satisfies me
 
2014-03-06 11:42:11 AM
Oh I forget to point at that when I'm at work and I go to the bathroom (single) and the person before me destroys the place I always leave the seat up incase that if someone is going in right after me they know it wasn't me that killed the place.
 
2014-03-06 11:44:04 AM

LeroyBourne: Hell, I wash my hands every time I use the bathroom, I don't see the big deal.


www.quickmeme.com
 
2014-03-06 11:46:10 AM
i26.photobucket.comi26.photobucket.comi26.photobucket.comi26.photobucket.com
 
2014-03-06 11:48:41 AM

TNel: Oh I forget to point at that when I'm at work and I go to the bathroom (single) and the person before me destroys the place I always leave the seat up incase that if someone is going in right after me they know it wasn't me that killed the place.


It's clear you've thought a lot about this.
 
2014-03-06 11:50:44 AM

BiffDangler: Chicks are stupid about this.  If you really want us to leave it down we will, but then it is going to get pissed all over.


I usually remember to put it down, but even when I forget, my wife has no problem looking before she sits. My wife is really cool...

Leaving the seat up is better than the alternative. Being a father, nothing has pissed me off over the years more than taking a poor kid in the bathroom somewhere where they are about to burst, and some asshole has pissed all over the seat because they haven't been taught the basic concept of being considerate of others, and they think that break in the front gives them super accurate aim or something. It's really fun to have to completely clean up the toilet while a 3 year old is doing the pee pee dance like they're having a Gran Mal seizure...
 
2014-03-06 11:52:43 AM
I loved this album.

img.fark.net
 
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