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(Huffington Post)   College students have discovered this newfangled thing called "anal sex". What WILL they think of next?   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 214
    More: Asinine, sex columnist  
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13340 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Mar 2014 at 8:50 AM (27 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-03-06 09:24:29 AM
College Kid #1 - "I'm pretty sure my roommate's gay."

College Kid #2 - "What makes you say that?"

College Kid #1 - "His dick tastes like shiat."
 
2014-03-06 09:24:50 AM
I tried to go to Brown University last weekend but I didn't get admitted : (
 
2014-03-06 09:25:32 AM

here to help: Most girls won't let me stick it in their pooper (too big) and frankly I'm okay with that. Anal sex smells awful.


Then you're doing it wrong.   Unless "awful" means "lube smell".
 
2014-03-06 09:27:20 AM
FTA: "Modern men and women have gone off the beaten path by moving their entry point two inches south from that of their forefathers," Abigail said on HuffPost Live. "Modern American couples have normalized the practice of anal sex. In the words of Frost 'the road less traveled by' has gained some serious traffic."

Previously:
- "OK, Abigail, I'm gonna go ahead and quote you for my awesome article on anal sex, but I'm gonna need you to really lay the metaphors on thick here. Hell, throw in a historical reference to illustrate how things have changed or a quote from someone famous to show how you actually went to college. Ya know, to really drive that farker home. Got it?"
 
2014-03-06 09:27:24 AM
FTFA: "44 percent of straight men and 36 percent of straight women admitted to having anal sex at least once in their lives"

So what? Having tried it once is hardly the same as there being some sort of epidemic of anal sex going on. They should ask if it's a regular part of their sexual routine. Lots of people will try something once, decide it's not their thing, and never do it again.
 
2014-03-06 09:29:02 AM

vudukungfu: Valiente: Twenty-one was a different story.

Bend a few birches back in your day?


Nice and easy did it, yes, every time.

/what's wrong with a kiss, boy?
 
2014-03-06 09:29:25 AM

Wrath of Heaven: I tried to go to Brown University last weekend but I didn't get admitted : (


Yeah, you have to be able to afford the tuition.
 
2014-03-06 09:29:37 AM
31.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-03-06 09:30:20 AM
Nasty gross ewww poop
 
2014-03-06 09:32:17 AM

King Something: walkerhound: vudukungfu: TheCableGuy: Brown University.

*Giggle*.

Isn't that where that Harry Potter chick went?
Don't make me post her name.
I promised the judge I wouldn't

This one?
[static.fjcdn.com image 391x244]

You wouldn't happen to have the unedited original, would you?


www.celebrityvalues.com
 
2014-03-06 09:32:58 AM
They're just now figuring out anal at Brown?  I was banging the ladies up the butt when I was in college 20 years ago, and I went to a state university.

And no, I wasn't always the one who brought it up.  Some women REALLY like the buttsex.

Of course, some of them say things like "you're way too big, no way are you putting that thing up my butt."
 
2014-03-06 09:34:15 AM

Fissile: I really don't understand the appeal of anal....


For one thing, it doubles your chances of finding a partner.
 
2014-03-06 09:35:52 AM

xanadian: Wrath of Heaven: I tried to go to Brown University last weekend but I didn't get admitted : (

Yeah, you have to be able to afford the tuition.


I wasn't Brown material : )
 
2014-03-06 09:37:06 AM
Be careful, it's usually well-guarded.

i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-06 09:38:04 AM
I've gone 51 years without the anal, and I'm perfectly OK with that. I imagine Mrs_Fabulous is pretty OK with that, too.

Seriously, it just doesn't appeal to me. But hey, knock yourselves out.
 
2014-03-06 09:38:18 AM
Yes Yes, and they all have rainbow parties where digital drugs are played on TV's and the jankum flows.
 
2014-03-06 09:39:07 AM

thisisyourbrainonFark: Be careful, it's usually well-guarded.

[i.imgur.com image 478x317]


I see that Goatse's finally gone full Sarlacc.
 
2014-03-06 09:41:03 AM
"Also, there are a number of doctors who will tell you the long term impact of anal sex on a regular basis is no fun for porn performers."

If this is true then every gay man over 30 should be in diapers right?
 
2014-03-06 09:41:51 AM

MemeSlave: here to help: Most girls won't let me stick it in their pooper (too big) and frankly I'm okay with that. Anal sex smells awful.

Then you're doing it wrong.   Unless "awful" means "lube smell".


Unless the catcher gives themselves an enema and an ass douche right before the action starts there IS going to be poop particles. Asses are kind of where poop lives.

Not being a misogynistic frat boy peckerhead I don't expect a woman to do all that prep work for something they aren't even designed to enjoy (unlike men who do have pleasure receptors in their butts). If they are REALLY into it and want me to plow the stink I will accommodate them however I have met very few women who were actually into it. Most seem to just do it because guys think it's teh bestest thing evar! It really isn't and it seems to be mostly a dominance/degradation thing for a lot of guys.

That's not to say there aren't woman out there who LOVE pooper sex but they are quite rare in my experience. I think I've only had one girl ask for me to drop it in there. Even then I think she was just trying to turn me on.
 
2014-03-06 09:43:59 AM

ChrisDe: mekki: TheCableGuy: Brown University.

*Giggle*.

Glad I am not only one who thought that would be a great euphemism.

"So, what are you and Lisa doing tonight?"
"Well, I think we are going to hang out. Have a few beers. Watch some television. And if I play my cards right, I think might be going to Brown University tonight."
"Allllriiiggghhhhttt."

I think you're onto something.

first time: I just enrolled at Brown U.
she said no: I got expelled from Brown U.
done it before, but not with this person: I'm tutoring a transfer student from Brown U.
pickup line in a bar: Hey, baby, I need three more credits to graduate from Brown U.


I'm lecturing at Brown U. : giving a rim-job.
 
2014-03-06 09:45:29 AM
Don't you kids get it?  You may think going anal is cool, butt there are consequences sneaking up behind you.  And they can be a real pain in the ass!  This hole fad smells like shiat, even if the thought of it gives you a shiat eating grin.

So here's the straight poop on the tissue:  Anal sex will just make look like an ass to your friends.


/it's the end of times, I tell you!
 
2014-03-06 09:47:21 AM

Virtue: "Also, there are a number of doctors who will tell you the long term impact of anal sex on a regular basis is no fun for porn performers."

If this is true then every gay man over 30 should be in diapers right?


Well, I think it's safe to presume most gay men aren't taking porn-sized dick in their arse four hours a day, so there's that.
 
2014-03-06 09:49:38 AM
as my 11th grade biology teacher said (in his thick scottish burr), "the anus was never meant for the pounding of the penis."

/he was discussing mucus membranes, not making ideological statements
 
2014-03-06 09:51:41 AM
Meh, it's overrated.
 
2014-03-06 09:52:53 AM

Savage Bacon: FTA: "Modern men and women have gone off the beaten path by moving their entry point two inches south from that of their forefathers," Abigail said on HuffPost Live. "Modern American couples have normalized the practice of anal sex. In the words of Frost 'the road less traveled by' has gained some serious traffic."

Previously:
- "OK, Abigail, I'm gonna go ahead and quote you for my awesome article on anal sex, but I'm gonna need you to really lay the metaphors on thick here. Hell, throw in a historical reference to illustrate how things have changed or a quote from someone famous to show how you actually went to college. Ya know, to really drive that farker home. Got it?"


Mmmmm!  HuffPo, and we're surprised that a pompous ass wrote the article, are we?  OK, then, what the next observation, "Hey, did you ever notice that the stuff from Salon really sucks?"
 
2014-03-06 09:55:06 AM
imageshack.com

Buncha preverts.
 
2014-03-06 09:55:37 AM

Fissile: I really don't understand the appeal of anal....either getting or receiving.  The sight or smell of shiat makes me sick to my stomach.  To avoid shiat, the receiver of anal needs to do quite a lot of prep work, so the act can't really be spontaneous.   No thanks, either way.


your killing the romance
 
2014-03-06 09:56:21 AM

here to help: MemeSlave: here to help: Most girls won't let me stick it in their pooper (too big) and frankly I'm okay with that. Anal sex smells awful.

Then you're doing it wrong.   Unless "awful" means "lube smell".

Unless the catcher gives themselves an enema and an ass douche right before the action starts there IS going to be poop particles. Asses are kind of where poop lives.

Not being a misogynistic frat boy peckerhead I don't expect a woman to do all that prep work for something they aren't even designed to enjoy (unlike men who do have pleasure receptors in their butts). If they are REALLY into it and want me to plow the stink I will accommodate them however I have met very few women who were actually into it. Most seem to just do it because guys think it's teh bestest thing evar! It really isn't and it seems to be mostly a dominance/degradation thing for a lot of guys.

That's not to say there aren't woman out there who LOVE pooper sex but they are quite rare in my experience. I think I've only had one girl ask for me to drop it in there. Even then I think she was just trying to turn me on.


I have this hypothesis that the number of women who love anal sex is roughly equal to the number of men who love receiving it.
I haven't actually done any research on this, but I bet it's true. Anybody got stats?
 
2014-03-06 09:56:31 AM

here to help: MemeSlave: here to help: Most girls won't let me stick it in their pooper (too big) and frankly I'm okay with that. Anal sex smells awful.

Then you're doing it wrong.   Unless "awful" means "lube smell".

Unless the catcher gives themselves an enema and an ass douche right before the action starts there IS going to be poop particles. Asses are kind of where poop lives.

Not being a misogynistic frat boy peckerhead I don't expect a woman to do all that prep work for something they aren't even designed to enjoy (unlike men who do have pleasure receptors in their butts). If they are REALLY into it and want me to plow the stink I will accommodate them however I have met very few women who were actually into it. Most seem to just do it because guys think it's teh bestest thing evar! It really isn't and it seems to be mostly a dominance/degradation thing for a lot of guys.

That's not to say there aren't woman out there who LOVE pooper sex but they are quite rare in my experience. I think I've only had one girl ask for me to drop it in there. Even then I think she was just trying to turn me on.


Well, the ones who absolutely love it are less common, but they are out there.  I've got an ex gf who complains to me about her current boyfriend because he won't put it in her butt.

And yes, there's occasionally poop on your dick.  That's what soap and water are for.  Always wash up before you switch back to the vagina, don't risk a urinary tract infection.
 
2014-03-06 10:03:45 AM

TheCableGuy: Brown University.

*Giggle*.


There's a UNIVERSITY for it?
 
2014-03-06 10:04:13 AM

verbaltoxin: Random Anonymous Blackmail: So you are saying that porn stars are actors and the situations they are in are sometimes unrealistic. I though every woman was a squirter.

No to become a pizza delivery guy for a college campus.

Oh yeah, all women moan like banshees during sex, they want their orifices pounded non-stop for 30 minutes or more without extra lubrication, they all squirt, all take it up the sh*tter, and every. single. college girl is bi-curious. Every one of them.

They just don't want to do any of that stuff with you. Sorry.


Yes, yes they do.  Some of them just don't know it yet.
 
2014-03-06 10:05:03 AM
So, TFA's linked article, the college rag column about anal sex, has comments below.
This one CRACKED ME UP! OMG.

NW_Mktg_Guy: Ms Idahosky - The people who may label the author as "cheap and easy" are the people who I feel sorry for and ashamed of. My guess is that those people don't even know her. To me, she comes off as intelligent, brave, and comfortable with who she is. She isn't in denial and she writes about the world that we all live in, but you would like to believe doesn't exist. No one would ask you to agree with or to embrace the actions being described. It's your choice to consider them as you see fit. In fact it's your right. But to suggest her column be censored or eliminated works against a freedom that ten's of thousands have fought to preserve. You're just wrong on that count.
One last observation about the author's parents. While they might not have chosen the type of column that she writes or the specific topics that she covers, I know that they are proud of her confidence, the skill of her reporting, and the amazing young adult that she's become. How would I know that? I'm one of her parents! You rocked it again Abby. Well done! *BIG SMILEY EMOTICON*


Of all the places for Cheerleader Dad to show up.... wow.
 
2014-03-06 10:05:31 AM

sedric: Fissile: I really don't understand the appeal of anal....either getting or receiving.  The sight or smell of shiat makes me sick to my stomach.  To avoid shiat, the receiver of anal needs to do quite a lot of prep work, so the act can't really be spontaneous.   No thanks, either way.

your killing the romance


Pumping away in a girl's butt, while the rooms fills with the lovely aroma of shiat, ultimately causing me to vomit all over the girl, has been my Valentine's day fantasy from as long as I can remember.  Come on ladies, get in line.
 
2014-03-06 10:07:59 AM
Just remember kids--anal is great, but for the love of Satan don't slip it in her rear and then into the whole betwixt two ear.

People are gross. You might as well just lay a dookie in her mouth.

/Autocorrect tried to change dookie to cookie
//Hilarity
 
2014-03-06 10:08:58 AM
All of you Farkers are hating on a tradition you know nothing about, you all must have been pencil-necked pizza-faced geeks in the Chess Club, fraternity brothers get access to more top-shelf pussy than you could shake a stick at, and the relationships you make in the Brotherhood will last you a lifetime. What? Oh, anal sex with chicks? I mean yeah, of course with chicks!
 
2014-03-06 10:09:27 AM

E5bie: I have this hypothesis that the number of women who love anal sex is roughly equal to the number of men who love receiving it.
I haven't actually done any research on this, but I bet it's true. Anybody got stats?


I'm betting it's significantly less. Men actually get something out of it because of the prostate being stimulated. Also if you take into account all the guys who WOULD love getting plowed but would never try it or admit it because "ew, icky gay!!" the amount of dudes into it would go way up.

/has had many girls try to stick their fingers up there
//nope
///I poop from there
 
2014-03-06 10:09:51 AM

Fissile: sedric: Fissile: I really don't understand the appeal of anal....either getting or receiving.  The sight or smell of shiat makes me sick to my stomach.  To avoid shiat, the receiver of anal needs to do quite a lot of prep work, so the act can't really be spontaneous.   No thanks, either way.

your killing the romance

Pumping away in a girl's butt, while the rooms fills with the lovely aroma of shiat, ultimately causing me to vomit all over the girl, has been my Valentine's day fantasy from as long as I can remember.  Come on ladies, get in line.


That's going to take some work on your part.  I know the puke fetish is real, but I've never actually met anyone into it.  Good luck finding someone, you're going to need it.
 
2014-03-06 10:12:59 AM
What what?
 
2014-03-06 10:13:40 AM

assets.nydailynews.com

Hey guys, what's going on in this thread?

 
2014-03-06 10:20:09 AM
img.fark.net
 
2014-03-06 10:21:21 AM
lube creates a barrier and just like PAM it wont let shiat stick to your penis.

When done right, it's awesome.  Takes patience and a relaxed slut though.

/wife is a slut
//slut is a term of endearment
 
2014-03-06 10:24:41 AM

Fissile: I really don't understand the appeal of anal....either getting or receiving.  The sight or smell of shiat makes me sick to my stomach.  To avoid shiat, the receiver of anal needs to do quite a lot of prep work, so the act can't really be spontaneous.   No thanks, either way.


I'm sure you don't wanna know how we know you're telling the truth about your lack of anal experience, but I'll let it suffice that poop doesn't get stored where you think it does.
 
2014-03-06 10:25:41 AM

Mr_Fabulous: I've gone 51 years without the anal, and I'm perfectly OK with that. I imagine Mrs_Fabulous is pretty OK with that, too.

Seriously, it just doesn't appeal to me. But hey, knock yourselves out.


Does she work during the day or should I wait until the weekend to come over so you can watch?
 
2014-03-06 10:27:40 AM

maram500: /Autocorrect tried to change dookie to cookie


At least it didn't try to change it to Wookiee...
 
2014-03-06 10:29:20 AM

AspectRatio: What what?


came here to say this
 
2014-03-06 10:29:58 AM
here to help:

/has had many girls try to stick their fingers up there
//nope
///I poop from there


Good to know! Personally, I have negative sexual interest in other people's butts. Wouldn't poke it if he begged me.
OTOH, if my butt is the clean, *rolls eyes* if he must...
 
2014-03-06 10:29:59 AM
Big difference between a couple having occasional 'special night' backdoor spelunking and porn queens who take triple anal or a fist up there.

And how are all these posters getting poop on their junk? You're not supposed to do it when she's ready to drop the kids at the pool. Planning/preparation is key.
 
2014-03-06 10:30:02 AM

here to help: E5bie: I have this hypothesis that the number of women who love anal sex is roughly equal to the number of men who love receiving it.
I haven't actually done any research on this, but I bet it's true. Anybody got stats?

I'm betting it's significantly less. Men actually get something out of it because of the prostate being stimulated. Also if you take into account all the guys who WOULD love getting plowed but would never try it or admit it because "ew, icky gay!!" the amount of dudes into it would go way up.

/has had many girls try to stick their fingers up there
//nope
///I poop from there


You can also stimulate the prostate by rubbing the crotchtal area, right behind the balls.  Works great with beejes.

/TMYK
 
2014-03-06 10:30:40 AM

Savage Bacon: Savage Bacon: FTA: "Modern men and women have gone off the beaten path by moving their entry point two inches south from that of their forefathers," Abigail said on HuffPost Live. "Modern American couples have normalized the practice of anal sex. In the words of Frost 'the road less traveled by' has gained some serious traffic."


When I'm looking at it, it's not south.
 
2014-03-06 10:30:52 AM

Koodz: Fissile: I really don't understand the appeal of anal....either getting or receiving.  The sight or smell of shiat makes me sick to my stomach.  To avoid shiat, the receiver of anal needs to do quite a lot of prep work, so the act can't really be spontaneous.   No thanks, either way.

I'm sure you don't wanna know how we know you're telling the truth about your lack of anal experience, but I'll let it suffice that poop doesn't get stored where you think it does.


I don't believe you're the one who knows what he's talking about.   I'm not trying to talk you out of it.  You like poop? Go right ahead, so long as I'm not involved.
 
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