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(Grantland)   Seriously, what's the big deal about Kate Upton (spoiler alert: It's boobs)   (grantland.com) divider line 110
    More: Cool, Kate Upton, humans, Gone Girl, boobs, Jayne Mansfield, Brigitte Bardot, Christie Brinkley, Elle Macpherson  
•       •       •

10928 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 05 Mar 2014 at 3:42 PM (46 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



110 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-03-05 02:26:47 PM  
Well, this thread has serious potential. Too bad I'm at work.


This post, of course, in no way should be construed as a bookmark.
 
2014-03-05 02:39:29 PM  
Really that's all that is interesting about her.

img839.imageshack.us


But that's enough
 
2014-03-05 02:47:17 PM  
"Private Joker Kate Upton is silly and he's ignorant is pretty and she's charming, but he's got guts she's got amazing boobs and guts amazing boobs is enough."

076dd0a50e0c1255009e-bd4b8aabaca29897bc751dfaf75b290c.r40.cf1.rackcdn.com
 
2014-03-05 03:46:45 PM  
She's much prettier with her mouth shut.
 
2014-03-05 03:48:19 PM  

gopher321: Well, this thread has serious potential. Too bad I'm at work.


This post, of course, in no way should be construed as a bookmark.


I must point out that your post does indeed smell like a bookmark and that I have no ulterior motive in pointing that out
 
2014-03-05 03:48:40 PM  
espngrantland.files.wordpress.com

Boooooobs in Spaaaaace.

/Eeeee in Ppppp
 
2014-03-05 03:54:39 PM  
boobmark
 
2014-03-05 03:54:52 PM  
An up-close examination of the issue at hand.

http://i.imgur.com/14Gco71.gif (Possible NSFW and definitely too big for Fark)
 
2014-03-05 03:59:36 PM  
If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

i.imgur.comi.imgur.com  i.imgur.com


i.imgur.com

 
2014-03-05 03:59:49 PM  

Old Man Winter: She's much prettier with her mouth shut.


Not completely shut. Wrapped around a pole of some kind would suffice.
 
2014-03-05 04:02:13 PM  
Hey guys, what's happening in this thread?


/not a bookmark
 
2014-03-05 04:06:34 PM  
i.dailymail.co.uk

Read the note twice...
 
2014-03-05 04:07:14 PM  
www3.pictures.stylebistro.com
hmmm
 
2014-03-05 04:08:49 PM  
I have no idea what the big deal is...

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-05 04:11:06 PM  

Wellon Dowd: An up-close examination of the issue at hand.

http://i.imgur.com/14Gco71.gif (Possible NSFW and definitely too big for Fark)


Why does my face keep hitting my phone?
 
2014-03-05 04:13:49 PM  
She wore three different bikinis in the Vomit Comet photoshoot.

I think we all need to see the intermediate photos we all know were shot.
 
2014-03-05 04:14:19 PM  
That articles length vastly exceeded my interest in the subject.

/models are catty
//film at 11
///I'm Rick Romero reporting
 
2014-03-05 04:18:50 PM  
As the article states, she projects a friendly, bubbly, fun, girl-next-door personality. In her photos and videos that have gone viral, she laughs, smiles and doesn't seem to take herself too seriously...quite the opposite of many models. The huge cans are an added bonus.
 
2014-03-05 04:20:22 PM  

Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.  


In that second one, she bears a striking resemblance to that chick that was banging the Rolling Stones back in the day.
 
2014-03-05 04:23:20 PM  
As a ass man, i never seen the big deal with her. Now I know.
 
2014-03-05 04:24:23 PM  
She's cute and in the same continuum of "actually brunettes" as Denise Richards and that slightly chimp-faced

us.cdn001.fansshare.comcdn1.ouchpress.com
stuffpoint.com

Upton's the youngest and sports the biggest cup size, but they are all of a type. Heart-shaped face, pert-nosed, thick-browed, full-lipped, nice rack, carpets don't match curtains.

Not that there's anything...etc.
 
2014-03-05 04:26:55 PM  
cdn.nextimpulsesports.com
 
2014-03-05 04:28:09 PM  

Waldo Pepper: boobmark


                           ^^           ^^
 
2014-03-05 04:28:19 PM  

Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.


This.

Not only that, but give her 20 years and she's gunna be a heffer. I bet she's 275-300 by the time she's mid 40s, especially if she has a few kids.
 
2014-03-05 04:33:05 PM  

ReapTheChaos: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

This.

Not only that, but give her 20 years and she's gunna be a heffer. I bet she's 275-300 by the time she's mid 40s, especially if she has a few kids.


Yeah, I'm not sure if you realize this, but I'm fairly certain he was being sarcastic. The pics he posted were of her looking pretty in the face and not focusing on the tig ol bitties. Of course you could be posting sarcastically as well and I'm just not picking up on it.
 
2014-03-05 04:35:01 PM  
img.fark.net
             Kate Upton's tits!                                   Alright.
 
2014-03-05 04:35:40 PM  

ReapTheChaos: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

This.


Thankfully, that's inconsequential since the titties are in fact there. I know a spent longer ogling her side of the cover than the one with the other three. Because boobs.
 
2014-03-05 04:37:18 PM  

Dingleberry Dickwad: ReapTheChaos: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

This.

Not only that, but give her 20 years and she's gunna be a heffer. I bet she's 275-300 by the time she's mid 40s, especially if she has a few kids.

Yeah, I'm not sure if you realize this, but I'm fairly certain he was being sarcastic. The pics he posted were of her looking pretty in the face and not focusing on the tig ol bitties. Of course you could be posting sarcastically as well and I'm just not picking up on it.


Still, he's not wrong. Kate Upton looks soft with no muscle tone. She's young, that's why she is relatively thin. When she hits about 27 it's going to be really hard for her to keep the weight and shape (with her square torso and hips) to a point where she is conventionally attractive.
 
2014-03-05 04:38:23 PM  

ReapTheChaos: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

This.

Not only that, but give her 20 years and she's gunna be a heffer. I bet she's 275-300 by the time she's mid 40s, especially if she has a few kids.


People's bodies may change as they age, in the future, therefore they are not attractive now, when they are young.
 
2014-03-05 04:42:38 PM  
ok, here we go:

img.fark.net

img.fark.net

img.fark.net

img.fark.net

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-05 04:42:46 PM  
Still trying to figure it out...

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-05 04:43:56 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-03-05 04:44:30 PM  
It's not the boobs, it's that she almost always wears awful, poorly fitting bras and bikinis that let them flop and bounce around so that you think one is just about to fall out, even in still pictures. Believe me, she knows exactly what she's doing.
 
2014-03-05 04:50:17 PM  

Splish: It's not the boobs, it's that she almost always wears awful, poorly fitting bras and bikinis that let them flop and bounce around so that you think one is just about to fall out, even in still pictures. Believe me, she knows exactly what she's doing.


Theiss Theory of Titillation: "The degree to which a costume is considered sexy is directly dependent upon how accident-prone it appears to be."

William Ware Theiss, costume designer for the original Star Trek
 
2014-03-05 04:50:19 PM  

Splish: It's not the boobs, it's that she almost always wears awful, poorly fitting bras and bikinis that let them flop and bounce around so that you think one is just about to fall out, even in still pictures. Believe me, she knows exactly what she's doing.

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-05 04:51:06 PM  
How does her mole move from one side of her lip to the other throughout the pictures?
 
2014-03-05 04:51:43 PM  
It's a plot!

OK, two plots.

OK, two massive tracts of land.
www.intriguing.com
 
2014-03-05 04:51:47 PM  
She is pretty, she has a nice face, a good body, and some great breasts.

She also has a smile on her face and always seems to be having a good time, and is fine with being silly. She's also willing to be featured in stupid, over the top, advertisements (Carls JR?) and goofy pseudo science life tits in space. Overall, she's pretty and seems fun. What's not to like? It's better than the typical fashion model who has a raging hatred for all things nerd.
 
2014-03-05 04:53:46 PM  

dryknife: How does her mole move from one side of her lip to the other throughout the pictures?


Same way they do in your yard:  rugged determination.
 
2014-03-05 04:54:49 PM  

dryknife: How does her mole move from one side of her lip to the other throughout the pictures?


Wait a minute, I have been looking at these pictures for a while and I haven't seen a single face. Are you sure you aren't mistaken?
 
2014-03-05 04:54:55 PM  

drjekel_mrhyde: As a ass man, i never seen the big deal with her. Now I know.


Yeah, it does appear that somebody stole her hips and ass.
 
2014-03-05 04:56:46 PM  

dryknife: How does her mole move from one side of her lip to the other throughout the pictures?


It isn't real: it is shopped.
 
2014-03-05 04:56:53 PM  
fta: there have been some rumors that the other models resent her for monopolizing the spotlight.
NSS.
And we might get a ca ca ca ca ca catfight out of the deal.
 
2014-03-05 04:58:43 PM  
I read this yesterday, and this is the part that still sticks with me most:
She told Elle last year that the experience of being on the SI cover was not validating, but horrifying: "I felt terrible about myself for a solid month. Every single guy I met was either married or about to be married, and I felt like I was their bachelor present or something. I'm not a toy, I'm a human. I'm not here to be used. I am a grown woman, and you need to figure your shiat out."

That right there tells us she doesn't really understand what she does for a living and where her money comes from.  "I get paid for how I look" is where her mind stops.  Stupid selfish models.  Has one, just one ever said, "Thanks for jerking off to me?"
 
2014-03-05 05:00:57 PM  

Splish: It's not the boobs, it's that she almost always wears awful, poorly fitting bras and bikinis that let them flop and bounce around so that you think one is just about to fall out, even in still pictures. Believe me, she knows exactly what she's doing.


i78.photobucket.com

Lucille and Cool Hand Luke agree with your assessment.
 
2014-03-05 05:02:49 PM  
I think she's so popular because she has 'a girl next door' looks, with a fantastic body. 

She looks accessible, kinda like Jennifer Lawrence does.

Pretty but not gorgeous.
 
2014-03-05 05:07:23 PM  

ReapTheChaos: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

This.

Not only that, but give her 20 years and she's gunna be a heffer. I bet she's 275-300 by the time she's mid 40s, especially if she has a few kids.


I am sure that 25 years from now, somewhere there will be a guy who will rightfully claim "I banged a young Kate Upton."  And he will rightfully be a hero.

Jerry Brown is Jerry Brown, but he did get with a young Linda Ronstadt.  Give the man his props.
 
2014-03-05 05:08:38 PM  

phimuskapsi: I think she's so popular because she has 'a girl next door' looks, with a fantastic body. 

She looks accessible, kinda like Jennifer Lawrence does.

Pretty but not gorgeous.


Precisely what the author said.  Kate is the girl next in just about every sense, and it just makes her even hotter.
 
2014-03-05 05:12:57 PM  
I'm a leg/ass man, but i think she's fantastic.... so although her boobs are great, but there's more to it than that.   I don't even go for blondes, but she is top notch.....

I think it has something to do with that she walks a fine line between innocence and class, verses being an all-out sex kitten...
 
2014-03-05 05:20:23 PM  

Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.


Exactly.  If you can focus it past her boobs (it's not easy), she's got a beautiful face and ass.
 
2014-03-05 05:22:02 PM  
posing gamely with the other models to quash the rumors that they have beef

Oh she beefs all right...


Valiente: She's cute and in the same continuum of "actually brunettes" as Denise Richards and that slightly chimp-faced

img.fark.net

Upton's the youngest and sports the biggest cup size, but they are all of a type. Heart-shaped face, pert-nosed, thick-browed, full-lipped, nice rack, carpets don't match curtains.

Not that there's anything...etc.


Billie Piper?
 
2014-03-05 05:22:46 PM  
media2.giphy.com
 
2014-03-05 05:33:44 PM  
Upton's boobs are tremendous.  Top-notch.

But I'm more of an hourglass figure guy, and her stomach does nothing for me.  Kinda thick through the middle with no shape.  And although she's very pretty, she's in the third quartile for models.

Like Jennifer Lawrence, she has an approachable down-to-Earth personality, and personality goes a long way.  (just read that in Samuel L. Jackson's voice)
 
2014-03-05 05:39:04 PM  

Banned on the Run: Upton's boobs are tremendous.  Top-notch.

But I'm more of an hourglass figure guy, and her stomach does nothing for me.  Kinda thick through the middle with no shape.  And although she's very pretty, she's in the third quartile for models.

Like Jennifer Lawrence, she has an approachable down-to-Earth personality, and personality goes a long way.  (just read that in Samuel L. Jackson's voice)


Sounds better in Morgan Freeman's voice, and even better in Jennifer Lawrence's voice.
 
2014-03-05 05:43:43 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: Really that's all that is interesting about her.




But that's enough


Oh I don't know... I also find her pussy pretty interesting and tasty I'll bet.
 
2014-03-05 05:49:03 PM  
Billie Piper?


NO. fark that living wolvertoon
 
2014-03-05 05:54:41 PM  
Epic boobs, cute face. I think she's over-rated, but that's just me. If she put on a little muscle and lost a few pounds of fat she'd be completely slammin' in my book
 
2014-03-05 06:04:58 PM  

Dr Jack Badofsky: Banned on the Run: Upton's boobs are tremendous.  Top-notch.

But I'm more of an hourglass figure guy, and her stomach does nothing for me.  Kinda thick through the middle with no shape.  And although she's very pretty, she's in the third quartile for models.

Like Jennifer Lawrence, she has an approachable down-to-Earth personality, and personality goes a long way.  (just read that in Samuel L. Jackson's voice)

Sounds better in Morgan Freeman's voice, and even better in Jennifer Lawrence's voice.


Now I'm trying to imagine Jennifer Lawrence saying "Titty sprinkles".
 
2014-03-05 06:08:36 PM  

fusillade762: Now I'm trying to imagine Jennifer Lawrence saying "Titty sprinkles".


img.fark.net
 
2014-03-05 06:22:28 PM  
"I didn't want to be the one to tell him, but with those narrow hips, that girl couldn't have more than 6 or 7 children!"
 
2014-03-05 06:23:35 PM  
Although Kate Upton is still a far cry from the models used in Dove's "Real Beauty" campaign and its ilk, she is much closer to them than any major supermodel in years if not decades, yet is still widely acknowledged as being mind-shatteringly attractive.

Baby steps.
 
2014-03-05 06:26:13 PM  

ReapTheChaos: Not only that, but give her 20 years and she's gunna be a heffer. I bet she's 275-300 by the time she's mid 40s, especially if she has a few kids.


That's what I love about fapping to a picture of a 21-year-old. I get older, she stays the same age.
 
2014-03-05 06:37:43 PM  
I think that there should be a new rule on Fark that when you diss a girl who has made millions for being pretty that they should have to put a pic of them along with pics of every girl they have dated.

//She's Canadian, you wouldn't know her.
 
2014-03-05 06:43:24 PM  
It's times like this when I think of the sage words of Joe Walsh... (might be NSFW)

Uh Huh
I like big tits
You see 'em on the street
Left and right
I like big tits...(that's right!)
I try to look away but I can't resist
Every time I try to call it quits
Hear come some tits, uh huh, thats a big 10-4

Uh huh
I like big tits
Tits
Well they come in twos
Hard to choose
Your favorite tit

Uh huh
I like tits for dinner, or a noontime snack
I like tits for lunch (a big tit attack!)
I like tits for breakfast
Eggs Benedict tits
What it is tits what it is
They're where it's at
Tits
They give me shivers when they bounce around
Puckered up or hanging on the ground
I like big tits

Uh huh
Tits...says it all for me
Tits

us.cdn281.fansshare.com

The wisdom of the ages...
 
2014-03-05 07:19:48 PM  
and just because....

i216.photobucket.com


This pic oozes the personality that makes her more popular than what looks alone get her
i216.photobucket.com
 
2014-03-05 07:46:23 PM  

dryknife: How does her mole move from one side of her lip to the other throughout the pictures?


i.imgur.com
What mole?
 
2014-03-05 07:51:20 PM  

Banned on the Run: and just because....

[i216.photobucket.com image 500x720]


This pic oozes the personality that makes her more popular than what looks alone get her
[i216.photobucket.com image 500x281]


No, that's just your spooge.

I think any "personality" you infer from her pictures is all in your head. (I mean, your imagination.)
 
2014-03-05 07:55:22 PM  

foo monkey: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

Exactly.  If you can focus it past her boobs (it's not easy), she's got a beautiful face and ass.


l1.yimg.com

www.hecklerspray.com

?? ...If you say so.

I think it's the makeup and Photoshop you're admiring.
 
2014-03-05 07:59:44 PM  

Millennium: Although Kate Upton is still a far cry from the models used in Dove's "Real Beauty" campaign and its ilk, she is much closer to them than any major supermodel in years if not decades, yet is still widely acknowledged as being mind-shatteringly attractive.

Baby steps.


My understanding is that the fashion industry used women like this for a long time. Till it got tired of the focus and attention being on the tits, and not the cloth, so it switched to a much more austere look for 'catwalk perfect', which led to the long running walking coat rack model type.
 
2014-03-05 08:14:08 PM  

Nix Nightbird: foo monkey: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

Exactly.  If you can focus it past her boobs (it's not easy), she's got a beautiful face and ass.

[l1.yimg.com image 600x429]

[www.hecklerspray.com image 386x382]

?? ...If you say so.

I think it's the makeup and Photoshop you're admiring.


That's what I was trying to point out earlier, but people here at Fark don't want to hear anything bad about her. She's not ugly or anything and she's not really fat, yet. Give her time though, she has "fat tub O lard" written all over her. I'd bet the only thing keeping her in the shape she's in now is her busy lifestyle and schedule. When she slows down, especially if she has a kid or two, she's going to balloon out in a hurry.
 
2014-03-05 08:28:30 PM  
She just looks so soft.  Plus she has pretty eyes to look into when you are on top of her.
 
2014-03-05 08:51:28 PM  

ReapTheChaos: Nix Nightbird: foo monkey: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

Exactly.  If you can focus it past her boobs (it's not easy), she's got a beautiful face and ass.

[l1.yimg.com image 600x429]

[www.hecklerspray.com image 386x382]

?? ...If you say so.

I think it's the makeup and Photoshop you're admiring.

That's what I was trying to point out earlier, but people here at Fark don't want to hear anything bad about her. She's not ugly or anything and she's not really fat, yet. Give her time though, she has "fat tub O lard" written all over her. I'd bet the only thing keeping her in the shape she's in now is her busy lifestyle and schedule. When she slows down, especially if she has a kid or two, she's going to balloon out in a hurry.


Whatever. I saw Jessica Simpson at LAX when she was farking (relatively) huge and she was still smoking hot.
 
2014-03-05 08:55:59 PM  

LonMead: It's times like this when I think of the sage words of Joe Walsh... (might be NSFW)

Uh Huh
I like big tits
You see 'em on the street
Left and right
I like big tits...(that's right!)
I try to look away but I can't resist
Every time I try to call it quits
Hear come some tits, uh huh, thats a big 10-4

Uh huh
I like big tits
Tits
Well they come in twos
Hard to choose
Your favorite tit

Uh huh
I like tits for dinner, or a noontime snack
I like tits for lunch (a big tit attack!)
I like tits for breakfast
Eggs Benedict tits
What it is tits what it is
They're where it's at
Tits
They give me shivers when they bounce around
Puckered up or hanging on the ground
I like big tits

Uh huh
Tits...says it all for me
Tits



The wisdom of the ages...


I'm more about Carlin out of one of the Seven Words bits (don't remember which album it was).

Wow! And tits doesn't even belong on the list, ya know? It's such a friendly sounding word. Sounds like a nickname right? Hey Tits, come here man. It's Tits. Hey Tits meet Toots. Tits Toots, Toots Tits man. Sounds like a snack doesn't it? Yes, I know it is...Right. And I don't mean your sexist snack, I mean New Nabisco Tits. New Cheese Tits. Corn Tits and Pizza Tits and Sesame Tits and Onion Tits. Tater tits! Yeah, bet you can't eat just one, right? That's true, I usually switch off. But I mean that word does not belong on the list.
 
2014-03-05 09:02:25 PM  
"I'm a normal, red-blooded American man. I like to look at naked women. I love breasts, any kind. I love 'em! Boobs, bazooms, balloons, bags, bazongas. The bigger, the better. Nipples like udders, nipples like saucers, big pale rosy-brown nipples. Little bitty baby nipples. Real or fake, what's the difference? I like tits. Who's kidding who? Tits are great!"

Greg Kinnear as Bob Crane, Auto Focus (2002)
 
2014-03-05 09:04:47 PM  

just_intonation: LonMead: It's times like this when I think of the sage words of Joe Walsh... (might be NSFW)

Uh Huh
I like big tits
You see 'em on the street
Left and right
I like big tits...(that's right!)
I try to look away but I can't resist
Every time I try to call it quits
Hear come some tits, uh huh, thats a big 10-4

Uh huh
I like big tits
Tits
Well they come in twos
Hard to choose
Your favorite tit

Uh huh
I like tits for dinner, or a noontime snack
I like tits for lunch (a big tit attack!)
I like tits for breakfast
Eggs Benedict tits
What it is tits what it is
They're where it's at
Tits
They give me shivers when they bounce around
Puckered up or hanging on the ground
I like big tits

Uh huh
Tits...says it all for me
Tits

The wisdom of the ages...

I'm more about Carlin out of one of the Seven Words bits (don't remember which album it was).

Wow! And tits doesn't even belong on the list, ya know? It's such a friendly sounding word. Sounds like a nickname right? Hey Tits, come here man. It's Tits. Hey Tits meet Toots. Tits Toots, Toots Tits man. Sounds like a snack doesn't it? Yes, I know it is...Right. And I don't mean your sexist snack, I mean New Nabisco Tits. New Cheese Tits. Corn Tits and Pizza Tits and Sesame Tits and Onion Tits. Tater tits! Yeah, bet you can't eat just one, right? That's true, I usually switch off. But I mean that word does not belong on the list.


Class Clown, I had that on vinyl once upon a time. I think it used to belong to one of my uncles. I still remember playing that thing and using my boombox to record it onto a cassette so I could play it at a friends house for him.
 
2014-03-05 09:05:03 PM  

foo monkey: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

Exactly.  If you can focus it past her boobs (it's not easy), she's got a beautiful face and ass.


Ok, I'm confused. You say 'exactly' but then seemingly contradict Wellon Dowd
 
2014-03-05 09:07:35 PM  

softshoes: dryknife: How does her mole move from one side of her lip to the other throughout the pictures?

[i.imgur.com image 500x275]
What mole?


HA! Good ref!
 
2014-03-05 09:17:56 PM  

fusillade762: posing gamely with the other models to quash the rumors that they have beef

Oh she beefs all right...


Valiente: She's cute and in the same continuum of "actually brunettes" as Denise Richards and that slightly chimp-faced

[img.fark.net image 850x531]

Upton's the youngest and sports the biggest cup size, but they are all of a type. Heart-shaped face, pert-nosed, thick-browed, full-lipped, nice rack, carpets don't match curtains.

Not that there's anything...etc.

Billie Piper?


Yes. Preview would be my friend, and the phone rang.
 
2014-03-05 09:18:28 PM  

softshoes: dryknife: How does her mole move from one side of her lip to the other throughout the pictures?

[i.imgur.com image 500x275]
What mole?


www.wearysloth.com

I have a MOLE?
 
2014-03-05 09:38:17 PM  

fusillade762: posing gamely with the other models to quash the rumors that they have beef

Oh she beefs all right...


Valiente: She's cute and in the same continuum of "actually brunettes" as Denise Richards and that slightly chimp-faced

[img.fark.net image 850x531]

Upton's the youngest and sports the biggest cup size, but they are all of a type. Heart-shaped face, pert-nosed, thick-browed, full-lipped, nice rack, carpets don't match curtains.

Not that there's anything...etc.

Billie Piper?


Pipe er? I'd do more 'an that mate
 
2014-03-05 09:39:26 PM  

just_intonation: softshoes: dryknife: How does her mole move from one side of her lip to the other throughout the pictures?

[i.imgur.com image 500x275]
What mole?

[www.wearysloth.com image 319x240]

I have a MOLE?


img.fark.netimg.fark.net

Buck Melanoma, Moley Russell's wart. Not her wart, not her wart. I'm... I'm the wart. She's my tumor. My... my growth. My... uh, my pimple. I'm Uncle Wart. Just old Buckwart Russell. That's what they call me, or Melanoma Head. They'll call me that. "Melanoma Head's coming!" I'm her uncle! Maisy Russell's uncle!
 
2014-03-05 09:56:21 PM  
The obvious answer is her amazing boobs

Sorry to be pedantic here, but she does not have amazing boobs. Amazing boobs should make you think, "Oh my God, look at those boobs! How do they do that?"

Her boobs are large.
 
2014-03-05 10:25:39 PM  

John Buck 41: foo monkey: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

Exactly.  If you can focus it past her boobs (it's not easy), she's got a beautiful face and ass.

Ok, I'm confused. You say 'exactly' but then seemingly contradict Wellon Dowd


I don't think you understood Wellon's fundamental point.

/or am I three deep into snark and I'M the one who's lost
 
2014-03-05 10:41:49 PM  

macadamnut: The obvious answer is her amazing boobs

Sorry to be pedantic here, but she does not have amazing boobs. Amazing boobs should make you think, "Oh my God, look at those boobs! How do they do that?"

Her boobs are large.


Nobody tell macadamnut about how misused "literally" and "irony" have become.

i.imgur.com

 
2014-03-05 10:45:55 PM  

dryknife: How does her mole move from one side of her lip to the other throughout the pictures?


Not moved, just shooped out.

/not that I noticed the first time around
 
2014-03-05 11:16:53 PM  

100 Watt Walrus: Nobody tell macadamnut about how misused "literally" and "irony" have become.


I just think boobs should be properly defined.
 
2014-03-05 11:19:37 PM  

Thank You Black Jesus!: ReapTheChaos: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

This.

Not only that, but give her 20 years and she's gunna be a heffer. I bet she's 275-300 by the time she's mid 40s, especially if she has a few kids.

I am sure that 25 years from now, somewhere there will be a guy who will rightfully claim "I banged a young Kate Upton."  And he will rightfully be a hero.

Jerry Brown is Jerry Brown, but he did get with a young Linda Ronstadt.  Give the man his props.


Justin Verlander is currently on round 2. Considering the options of a Justin Verlander that means one or both of the following:

* She's *that* good
* Her baggage is limited enough that someone would be willing come back for Round 2, knowing what they'd be in for
 
2014-03-05 11:37:23 PM  

Stratohead: Billie Piper?


NO. fark that living wolvertoon Bad Wolf


FTFY
 
2014-03-06 12:31:33 AM  

macadamnut: 100 Watt Walrus: Nobody tell macadamnut about how misused "literally" and "irony" have become.

I just think boobs should be properly defined.


Ahh, well that's perfectly understandable. Would you accept "spectacular"? Because I'd go with "spectacular."
 
2014-03-06 01:51:47 AM  
a.gifb.in
 
2014-03-06 03:59:11 AM  
I still think she needs a few more years to reach her potential.
 
2014-03-06 05:04:42 AM  
It would have been nice if her headlights came with a trunk to match, but who am I to complain about the boot on a Testarossa?
 
2014-03-06 06:36:05 AM  

kroonermanblack: She is pretty, she has a nice face, a good body, and some great breasts.

She also has a smile on her face and always seems to be having a good time, and is fine with being silly. She's also willing to be featured in stupid, over the top, advertisements (Carls JR?) and goofy pseudo science life tits in space. Overall, she's pretty and seems fun. What's not to like? It's better than the typical fashion model who has a raging hatred for all things nerd.


Haven't you heard?  She has a "weird torso", and it's just possible that she might gain weight in the future, therefore she is completely unattractive and way below our standards.
 
2014-03-06 08:04:20 AM  
Boob mark
 
2014-03-06 08:23:30 AM  
She's cute and seems to have a great attitude.  Attractive in the way Jennifer Lawrence is, since someone mentioned her..

I don't think KU will age well though, the way some get by on baby fat being cute. She looks as if the moment her skin starts to sag, it's going to sag further than most.  Already, while she looks great and jiggles in a bra, the breasts seem like they'd pancake out and go to her navel if left unsupported.  Not being mean or judgemental, mind you, just a discussion of structure.  Her body composition just doesn't have that firmness that is more classically/universally hot.

 Not sure about JL, she's still very young and seems more firm.

JL's future isn't based on being a fashion model though, so she won't catch flak for it like Upton will.
 
2014-03-06 08:55:13 AM  
Once again this tread proves that on the internet no matter how obvious you make it that you are being sarcastic, someone is going to take you seriously.
 
2014-03-06 09:33:52 AM  

ReapTheChaos: Nix Nightbird: foo monkey: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

Exactly.  If you can focus it past her boobs (it's not easy), she's got a beautiful face and ass.

[l1.yimg.com image 600x429]

[www.hecklerspray.com image 386x382]

?? ...If you say so.

I think it's the makeup and Photoshop you're admiring.

That's what I was trying to point out earlier, but people here at Fark don't want to hear anything bad about her. She's not ugly or anything and she's not really fat, yet. Give her time though, she has "fat tub O lard" written all over her. I'd bet the only thing keeping her in the shape she's in now is her busy lifestyle and schedule. When she slows down, especially if she has a kid or two, she's going to balloon out in a hurry.


Who gives a shiat? My dong isn't trying to predict the future.
 
2014-03-06 09:39:02 AM  

100 Watt Walrus: macadamnut: 100 Watt Walrus: Nobody tell macadamnut about how misused "literally" and "irony" have become.

I just think boobs should be properly defined.

Ahh, well that's perfectly understandable. Would you accept "spectacular"? Because I'd go with "spectacular."



Definitely, real and spectacular. For "amazing" you gotta pass the pencil test.
 
2014-03-06 09:57:25 AM  

Valiente: She's cute and in the same continuum of "actually brunettes" as Denise Richards and that slightly chimp-faced

[us.cdn001.fansshare.com image 760x570][cdn1.ouchpress.com image 850x531]
[stuffpoint.com image 850x850]

Upton's the youngest and sports the biggest cup size, but they are all of a type. Heart-shaped face, pert-nosed, thick-browed, full-lipped, nice rack, carpets don't match curtains.

Not that there's anything...etc.


amount of this post being read = 0%, (especially that part at the bottom).
 
2014-03-06 10:14:20 AM  

nocturnal001: ReapTheChaos: Nix Nightbird: foo monkey: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

Exactly.  If you can focus it past her boobs (it's not easy), she's got a beautiful face and ass.

[l1.yimg.com image 600x429]

[www.hecklerspray.com image 386x382]

?? ...If you say so.

I think it's the makeup and Photoshop you're admiring.

That's what I was trying to point out earlier, but people here at Fark don't want to hear anything bad about her. She's not ugly or anything and she's not really fat, yet. Give her time though, she has "fat tub O lard" written all over her. I'd bet the only thing keeping her in the shape she's in now is her busy lifestyle and schedule. When she slows down, especially if she has a kid or two, she's going to balloon out in a hurry.

Who gives a shiat? My dong isn't trying to predict the future.


Yo, I be crystal ballin'
 
2014-03-06 10:14:52 AM  

TotallyHeadless: Kate Upton looks soft with no muscle tone. She's young, that's why she is relatively thin. When she hits about 27 it's going to be really hard for her to keep the weight and shape (with her square torso and hips) to a point where she is conventionally attractive.


She's got plenty of money.  She won't have to work daily as regular folks do, so she'll have plenty of time to hire a personal trainer and work out.  Unless she just says fuggit and lets herself go....kinda like Jennifer Lien.

i1168.photobucket.com
 
2014-03-06 10:40:45 AM  

ristst: TotallyHeadless: Kate Upton looks soft with no muscle tone. She's young, that's why she is relatively thin. When she hits about 27 it's going to be really hard for her to keep the weight and shape (with her square torso and hips) to a point where she is conventionally attractive.

She's got plenty of money.  She won't have to work daily as regular folks do, so she'll have plenty of time to hire a personal trainer and work out.  Unless she just says fuggit and lets herself go....kinda like Jennifer Lien.

[i1168.photobucket.com image 549x373]


Wow! I am happy I never googled her after the show ended. What a waste, she was so cute.

Kate does have really nice boobs, a bit big for my own tastes but not a deal breaker. I mean that as if I met a woman I had a chance with that had boobs that big. I am an A, B, kind of C type of guy. I like them small and perky, they tend to stay that way much longer on smaller breasts.
 
2014-03-06 10:56:07 AM  

Valiente: nocturnal001: ReapTheChaos: Nix Nightbird: foo monkey: Wellon Dowd: If it weren't for her big ole titties, nobody would give her a second glance.

Exactly.  If you can focus it past her boobs (it's not easy), she's got a beautiful face and ass.

[l1.yimg.com image 600x429]

[www.hecklerspray.com image 386x382]

?? ...If you say so.

I think it's the makeup and Photoshop you're admiring.

That's what I was trying to point out earlier, but people here at Fark don't want to hear anything bad about her. She's not ugly or anything and she's not really fat, yet. Give her time though, she has "fat tub O lard" written all over her. I'd bet the only thing keeping her in the shape she's in now is her busy lifestyle and schedule. When she slows down, especially if she has a kid or two, she's going to balloon out in a hurry.

Who gives a shiat? My dong isn't trying to predict the future.

Yo, I be crystal ballin'


I'm more of a palm reader myself...
 
2014-03-06 11:07:08 AM  

macadamnut: 100 Watt Walrus: macadamnut: 100 Watt Walrus: Nobody tell macadamnut about how misused "literally" and "irony" have become.

I just think boobs should be properly defined.

Ahh, well that's perfectly understandable. Would you accept "spectacular"? Because I'd go with "spectacular."


Definitely, real and spectacular. For "amazing" you gotta pass the pencil test.


I would say great, super, fine.(in no particular order)

Spectacular and Amazing should both be on the other side of the pencil test. with something more common just shy of the pencil.  Awesome, fantastic, superb.

So, now I've interested myself(easy to do when I take a snow day from work and am sitting around bored), I'm going to give it a shot.
(mournful tits to bad implants, even those that pass the pencil test are not to be considered, the list is based on the premise is that those under review are mostly aesthetically pleasing, have no objective flaws, scars, stretch marks like a water mellon, disfigurement, shrivelled granny boobs, etc...(good implants in pretty breasts is a subjective flaw, since we're discussing things that none of us will ever touch, it's more about grading visual appeal))

Fine(as in just fine, those'll do)?
Nice(can encompass "cute" to "Niiiice")
Great
Fine(as in that is one Fine set of)?
Fantastic
Awesome
And now the terms only for those that pass the pencil test.
Superb
Amazing
Spectacular

As you get towards the bottom of the list, they sort of have to be big. Awe, amazement, spectacle, these all denote something that's beyond expectation, something out of the ordinary)  But the top of the list can be any size really.  But you can have a small-medium "Superb"(which are more likely to pass the pencil test).  Awesome can account for bigger, firm, well shaped, but does technically hold a pencil up.  That's the Venn diagram overlap.

/thoughts?
 
2014-03-06 01:12:48 PM  

omeganuepsilon: macadamnut: 100 Watt Walrus: macadamnut: 100 Watt Walrus: Nobody tell macadamnut about how misused "literally" and "irony" have become.

I just think boobs should be properly defined.

Ahh, well that's perfectly understandable. Would you accept "spectacular"? Because I'd go with "spectacular."


Definitely, real and spectacular. For "amazing" you gotta pass the pencil test.

I would say great, super, fine.(in no particular order)

Spectacular and Amazing should both be on the other side of the pencil test. with something more common just shy of the pencil.  Awesome, fantastic, superb.

So, now I've interested myself(easy to do when I take a snow day from work and am sitting around bored), I'm going to give it a shot.
(mournful tits to bad implants, even those that pass the pencil test are not to be considered, the list is based on the premise is that those under review are mostly aesthetically pleasing, have no objective flaws, scars, stretch marks like a water mellon, disfigurement, shrivelled granny boobs, etc...(good implants in pretty breasts is a subjective flaw, since we're discussing things that none of us will ever touch, it's more about grading visual appeal))

Fine(as in just fine, those'll do)?
Nice(can encompass "cute" to "Niiiice")
Great
Fine(as in that is one Fine set of)?
Fantastic
Awesome
And now the terms only for those that pass the pencil test.
Superb
Amazing
Spectacular

As you get towards the bottom of the list, they sort of have to be big. Awe, amazement, spectacle, these all denote something that's beyond expectation, something out of the ordinary)  But the top of the list can be any size really.  But you can have a small-medium "Superb"(which are more likely to pass the pencil test).  Awesome can account for bigger, firm, well shaped, but does technically hold a pencil up.  That's the Venn diagram overlap.

/thoughts?



You are using the wrong brain.
 
2014-03-06 01:16:06 PM  

omeganuepsilon: macadamnut: 100 Watt Walrus: macadamnut: 100 Watt Walrus: Nobody tell macadamnut about how misused "literally" and "irony" have become.

I just think boobs should be properly defined.

Ahh, well that's perfectly understandable. Would you accept "spectacular"? Because I'd go with "spectacular."


Definitely, real and spectacular. For "amazing" you gotta pass the pencil test.

I would say great, super, fine.(in no particular order)

Spectacular and Amazing should both be on the other side of the pencil test. with something more common just shy of the pencil.  Awesome, fantastic, superb.

So, now I've interested myself(easy to do when I take a snow day from work and am sitting around bored), I'm going to give it a shot.
(mournful tits to bad implants, even those that pass the pencil test are not to be considered, the list is based on the premise is that those under review are mostly aesthetically pleasing, have no objective flaws, scars, stretch marks like a water mellon, disfigurement, shrivelled granny boobs, etc...(good implants in pretty breasts is a subjective flaw, since we're discussing things that none of us will ever touch, it's more about grading visual appeal))

Fine(as in just fine, those'll do)?
Nice(can encompass "cute" to "Niiiice")
Great
Fine(as in that is one Fine set of)?
Fantastic
Awesome
And now the terms only for those that pass the pencil test.
Superb
Amazing
Spectacular

As you get towards the bottom of the list, they sort of have to be big. Awe, amazement, spectacle, these all denote something that's beyond expectation, something out of the ordinary)  But the top of the list can be any size really.  But you can have a small-medium "Superb"(which are more likely to pass the pencil test).  Awesome can account for bigger, firm, well shaped, but does technically hold a pencil up.  That's the Venn diagram overlap.

/thoughts?


files.abovetopsecret.com
 
2014-03-06 01:53:58 PM  
macadamnut: Fascinating

[files.abovetopsecret.com image 280x240]

That will never do.  Mournful can be fascinating, you know, like a trainwreck.
 
2014-03-06 02:32:06 PM  

ristst: TotallyHeadless: Kate Upton looks soft with no muscle tone. She's young, that's why she is relatively thin. When she hits about 27 it's going to be really hard for her to keep the weight and shape (with her square torso and hips) to a point where she is conventionally attractive.

She's got plenty of money.  She won't have to work daily as regular folks do, so she'll have plenty of time to hire a personal trainer and work out.  Unless she just says fuggit and lets herself go....kinda like Jennifer Lien.

[i1168.photobucket.com image 549x373]


Dayum.  That doesn't even look like the same person.
 
2014-03-06 06:24:11 PM  
Probably not a book mark
 
2014-03-06 07:14:37 PM  
Bookmark This!
/every relevant post ITT
//some (a few) that aren't relevant to my interests
///no text only posts
 
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