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(The Weather Channel)   Al Gore hired Lord of the Rings director Peter Jackson to direct this winter's weather. How else do you explain why it's had five logical endings, yet it just keeps going   (weather.com) divider line 54
    More: Interesting, lotr, Al Gore, winter weather, executive directors  
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1921 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Mar 2014 at 1:12 PM (30 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-03-05 01:13:57 PM
Phil lied to us!!
 
2014-03-05 01:14:40 PM
If they had just gotten the warm weather from the fall and used it on the first day of cold, this winter would've been over before it started.
 
2014-03-05 01:16:37 PM
Just think... If winter would just listen to TWC, instead of ending seasonally, like it does pretty much every year, it would have been over in January, and we'd be listening to TWC lamenting how it's so farking hot on the east coast for March at this point.

Does ANYONE even watch their shiat ass network anymore?
 
2014-03-05 01:17:36 PM
Come on.. I mean its not like Jackson came up with the concept of multiple endings. It was like that in the damn book you philistines.
 
2014-03-05 01:17:59 PM
So, Winter Storm Sauron is on its way?

/DNRTFA
 
2014-03-05 01:21:35 PM
Remember when the web was something where you could read about something? Farking video links... O_o

/Page written in HML, because we took the "Text" out of HTML...
 
2014-03-05 01:21:54 PM
It's Chicago's 45th day of measurable snow of the season -- the most to occur through March 5 in 129 years of official snow records.

There have been 26 days where the low temperature has been zero or below, a new record. The previous record-holding season, 1884-85, had 25 subzero days and none right at zero.

Chicago's 73.4 inches of snow so far this season, which the weather service counts as autumn through spring, stands at the fourth-most since 1884. That's slightly less than during 1969-70, which saw 77 inches. The only two years above those were in 1977-78 at 82.3 inches, and in 1978-79 at 89.7 inches total.

However, the weather service predicts more snow will hit Chicago on Tuesday night and possibly over the weekend, Castro said. That could push the city's snowfall total into second place, Castro said.

static.someecards.com
 
2014-03-05 01:21:55 PM
I don't usually like to yell "get off my weather station", but this winter is neither historically bad or historically long. Prior to 1990, this would've been about every third winter, as I recall. But there's only been one or two for the last 25 years.

The most notable thing for me is the lack of a Great Lakes thaw, but even the lakes froze mostly over in 1993-4 or something. In the 19th century (clearly before my time), it did so pretty much every year.

What I will want to see is if this "big winter" is followed by a "big summer", as I see evidence that the climate change we are getting is swinging the pendulum a little farther each decade. The upside, of course, is that the precip. east of the Rockies has been decent enough to (hopefully) keep the soil moist and to stop drawing down the frickin' aquifers.
 
2014-03-05 01:22:17 PM
Any competent screenwriter will have multiple logical endings, so the film can still be finished and released in the event something unfortunate happens like the budget is cut or exhausted or one of the primary actors dies before the end of the production.
 
2014-03-05 01:26:08 PM
Because it was originally written by someone else, and Jackson had heard enough whiny crybaby shiat about the stuff he already cut out.
 
2014-03-05 01:26:41 PM
And why gore was replaced with a giant digital troll.
 
2014-03-05 01:27:06 PM
I thought it was Game of Thrones weather: Winter is coming. It might last a couple of months, it might last for 30 years. We are all going to face the Ice Zombies or whatever the hell those pallid ghouls are. If we don't kill each other first, of course. Game of Thrones. I haven't seen a single episode but I know all about it from web chatter and parodies.

Oh, well. The codl (AKA normal) winter weather we've been having in the East has skipped the West and the world is still warming all around us. Could be the warmest winter on record globally, for all that I have to wear my ski pants to work.

It hasn't really bothered me much. Weather is always farked up in Ottawa, Ontario. Cold beats the Hell out of heat or ice water slushies in my boots.

You see, this is the kind of thing which caused some people to switch from talking about global warming, which sounds benign, to climate change, which sounds a bit more dangerous. EXTREME WEATHER,  to quote the weather pron mongers. The weather is not necessarily getting warmer everywhere, all the time.  Just because Spring starts a couple of weeks earlier doesn't mean you won't get a killing frost late in the season. In fact, that sort of thing is not proof that climate change is a hoax--it's one of the ways that it hurts plants, animals, agriculture and business.

On the plus side, we should have a good year for killing off insect pests that with climate change threaten our forests, crops and safety.

I hope the bees are safe but I don't mind seeing all those Chinese insect pests killed off across Canada and the US, and I hope it slows down the killer bees, the killer ants, and whatever those spiders that killed William Shatner and his little town were.
 
2014-03-05 01:27:53 PM

Valiente: What I will want to see is if this "big winter" is followed by a "big summer", as I see evidence that the climate change we are getting is swinging the pendulum a little farther each decade. The upside, of course, is that the precip. east of the Rockies has been decent enough to (hopefully) keep the soil moist and to stop drawing down the frickin' aquifers.


Depends on where you live, I believe this may be an El Nino year.
 
2014-03-05 01:28:07 PM
Why are we bringing Al Gore into this?
 
2014-03-05 01:28:22 PM
Yes, subby, I am also terribly bored with this winter.
 
2014-03-05 01:28:46 PM

TheOriginalEd: Come on.. I mean its not like Jackson came up with the concept of multiple endings. It was like that in the damn book you philistines.


this
 
2014-03-05 01:30:43 PM

Muta: Why are we bringing Al Gore into this?


Because he came up with the entire theory of global warming, alone and by himself, with absolutely no help from anyone.  Just like he did with the Internets.

/TIWCAB
 
2014-03-05 01:32:36 PM
what kind of stupid headline is this?
 
2014-03-05 01:34:03 PM

Pants full of macaroni!!: Muta: Why are we bringing Al Gore into this?

Because he came up with the entire theory of global warming, alone and by himself, with absolutely no help from anyone.  Just like he did with the Internets.

/TIWCAB


Because he wants all our money.
 
2014-03-05 01:36:08 PM

Valiente: I don't usually like to yell "get off my weather station", but this winter is neither historically bad or historically long. Prior to 1990, this would've been about every third winter, as I recall. But there's only been one or two for the last 25 years.


False. At least in Chicago. Granted we're an outlier:

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-05 01:37:24 PM
Oh, an Al Gore joke.  How timely.
 
2014-03-05 01:38:40 PM

Andy Andy: Valiente: What I will want to see is if this "big winter" is followed by a "big summer", as I see evidence that the climate change we are getting is swinging the pendulum a little farther each decade. The upside, of course, is that the precip. east of the Rockies has been decent enough to (hopefully) keep the soil moist and to stop drawing down the frickin' aquifers.

Depends on where you live, I believe this may be an El Nino year.


Which might be good for the otherwise doomed Californian agriculture industry. Rain would help, and I believe the child brings it.
 
2014-03-05 01:39:15 PM
i257.photobucket.com
 
2014-03-05 01:40:11 PM
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
 
2014-03-05 01:40:13 PM
Andric


Oh, an Al Gore joke. How timely.

Funny, I've never seen you whine about Regan jokes and he's been dead longer than algore's been irrelevant.
 
2014-03-05 01:46:26 PM

chairmenmeow47: what kind of stupid headline is this?


I believe it's a Level 3.
 
2014-03-05 01:48:45 PM
Subby, have you read Tolkien's Lord of the Rings? Two thirds of the way through, they complete their task. Another third of the book is ... more endings.

And the first third? They walk, they talk, they walk they talk they walk. Walk walk walk, talk talk talk, it's the walky and talky show!
 
2014-03-05 01:51:54 PM
"Oh I'm so glad we have all this Global Warming," says the Neocon Jebus Lover in the cube directly behind me. " 'Cause if it weren't for Global Warming, I guess the temperatures would be minus 100 degrees and there would be 10 feet of snow on the ground. Good thing we have Global warming..."

/from a few weeks ago
//And I don't think he was saying this to anyone in particular.
 
2014-03-05 01:53:56 PM

Pants full of macaroni!!: Muta: Why are we bringing Al Gore into this?

Because he came up with the entire theory of global warming, alone and by himself, with absolutely no help from anyone.  Just like he did with the Internets.


Gore didn't win a Nobel Peace Prize for inventing the internets.
 
2014-03-05 02:08:27 PM

chairmenmeow47: what kind of stupid headline is this?


Well, it involves the most stupid and boring book ever written so it's the most stupid headline possible.
 
2014-03-05 02:11:21 PM
Excellent headline.
 
2014-03-05 02:19:18 PM

Harry Freakstorm: "Oh I'm so glad we have all this Global Warming," says the Neocon Jebus Lover in the cube directly behind me. " 'Cause if it weren't for Global Warming, I guess the temperatures would be minus 100 degrees and there would be 10 feet of snow on the ground. Good thing we have Global warming..."

/from a few weeks ago
//And I don't think he was saying this to anyone in particular.


Here's what you do when that happens. Google "current year" and "heatwave." You will inevitably find a place in the world with record highs and can send an article about it to him. Right now it's Australia. If you do it enough he might learn his lesson about local weather and climate.
 
2014-03-05 02:22:58 PM

OnlyM3: Andric


Oh, an Al Gore joke. How timely.
Funny, I've never seen you whine about Regan jokes and he's been dead longer than algore's been irrelevant.


1) When have you ever seen me whine about anything?   2) It's spelled "Reagan."
 
2014-03-05 02:24:16 PM

Valiente: Andy Andy: Valiente: What I will want to see is if this "big winter" is followed by a "big summer", as I see evidence that the climate change we are getting is swinging the pendulum a little farther each decade. The upside, of course, is that the precip. east of the Rockies has been decent enough to (hopefully) keep the soil moist and to stop drawing down the frickin' aquifers.

Depends on where you live, I believe this may be an El Nino year.

Which might be good for the otherwise doomed Californian agriculture industry. Rain would help, and I believe the child brings it.

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-03-05 02:24:56 PM

Andric: OnlyM3: Andric


Oh, an Al Gore joke. How timely.
Funny, I've never seen you whine about Regan jokes and he's been dead longer than algore's been irrelevant.

1) When have you ever seen me whine about anything?   2) It's spelled "Reagan."


He means "Don Regan".
 
2014-03-05 02:28:04 PM

StopLurkListen: Subby, have you read Tolkien's Lord of the Rings? Two thirds of the way through, they complete their task. Another third of the book is ... more endings.

And the first third? They walk, they talk, they walk they talk they walk. Walk walk walk, talk talk talk, it's the walky and talky show!


So we're saying we should have gotten Aaron Sorkin to do LoTR?
 
2014-03-05 02:29:26 PM

Andric: 2) It's spelled "Reagan."


About half the time when Reagan is mentioned on Fark, it gets spelled Regan.  I figure it's a Fark meme and let it go.
 
2014-03-05 02:31:30 PM

Pants full of macaroni!!: Andric: 2) It's spelled "Reagan."

About half the time when Reagan is mentioned on Fark, it gets spelled Regan.  I figure it's a Fark meme and let it go.


Possibly.  I'd just hate to see the guy lose his Reagan Fanclub card and decoder ring over a spelling error.
 
2014-03-05 03:10:50 PM

TheOriginalEd: Come on.. I mean its not like Jackson came up with the concept of multiple endings. It was like that in the damn book you philistines.


Hardly, he left the longest "ending" out, the Scouring of the Shire.  Not only that, but dumping that part (everyone agreed it was the first to go, followed shortly by Bombadil) meant that Aragorn and not Frodo would be the hero (we would see Aragorn crowned King, but not Frodo lead the hobbits* to victory).  This lead to watering down Aragorn (from Aragorn son of Arathorn, to Aragorn son of Hamlet), Faramir (Faramir and Eowyn appear to be Tolkien's favorite characters), and even Frodo (Frodo's betrayal of Sam in the movies is not only counter to the book, but the book goes to great pains to explain Frodo's actions).

Jackson needed to include at least one more ending, or pander to illiterates even more and gut it all.
 
2014-03-05 03:20:37 PM
yeah, well, we haven't been getting a whole lot of *snow*, but we sure have been getting a metric butt-ton of cold...

Car_Ramrod: Valiente: I don't usually like to yell "get off my weather station", but this winter is neither historically bad or historically long. Prior to 1990, this would've been about every third winter, as I recall. But there's only been one or two for the last 25 years.

False. At least in Chicago. Granted we're an outlier:

[img.fark.net image 850x656]


That handy-dandy chart would be more useful if it showed the deviation from average in those gray areas (the poles).  Coz, where the everloving f#*% is all this cold air coming from!??  Polar vortex?  I can understand more rain/snow if the ocean's warming (hydrological cycle), but what is this shiat?

Ok, now I'm just venting.  Maybe if I let off enough hot air, I won't freeze my balls off outside.

/last fall was also cold
//so was last summer
///f this s, Imma moving to one of those red areas
 
2014-03-05 03:27:37 PM

xanadian: I can understand more rain/snow if the ocean's warming (hydrological cycle), but what is this shiat?


Different wind patterns due to extensive summer melt of Arctic ice.
 
2014-03-05 03:32:02 PM

TheOriginalEd: Come on.. I mean its not like Jackson came up with the concept of multiple endings. It was like that in the damn book you philistines.


They left out the most important ending - the Scouring of the Shire
 
2014-03-05 03:37:00 PM

OnlyM3: algore


DRINK!
 
2014-03-05 03:51:25 PM
And every 20 minutes I end up in the middle of a half hour computer generated chase scene that looks like its been lifted from a videogame.

I'm racking my brains to think what they're going to turn into a CG chase scene in the final hobbit movie.
 
2014-03-05 04:10:06 PM
brian.carnell.com
 
2014-03-05 05:19:05 PM
I miss winter... I've been tempted to turn my AC almost every day since the end of January...
 
2014-03-05 05:24:29 PM

yakmans_dad: xanadian: I can understand more rain/snow if the ocean's warming (hydrological cycle), but what is this shiat?

Different wind patterns due to extensive summer melt of Arctic ice.


These exact same wind patterns happened in 1974 and were blamed on Global Cooling.

/Seriously
//They were
///Look it up
 
2014-03-05 05:27:49 PM

Muta: Why are we bringing Al Gore into this?


Because he controls the weather. He made an entire movie about it.
 
2014-03-05 05:30:16 PM

Romeo_Santana: Muta: Why are we bringing Al Gore into this?

Because he controls the weather. He made an entire movie about it.


No,
24.media.tumblr.com

controls the weather
 
2014-03-05 06:49:48 PM

Romeo_Santana: yakmans_dad: xanadian: I can understand more rain/snow if the ocean's warming (hydrological cycle), but what is this shiat?

Different wind patterns due to extensive summer melt of Arctic ice.

These exact same wind patterns happened in 1974 and were blamed on Global Cooling.

/Seriously
//They were
///Look it up


I was an adult in 1974. Winter that year wasn't just like this year at all.
 
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