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(PennLive)   If you were going to buy a Martian crater like these people want to, what would you name it?   (pennlive.com) divider line 111
    More: Amusing, Martians, Martian crater, Punxsutawney  
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1630 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Mar 2014 at 4:52 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



111 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2014-03-03 01:14:23 PM  
Either Kenny's Rock or Dogma.
 
2014-03-03 01:15:44 PM  
Judge
 
2014-03-03 01:19:23 PM  
Frank
 
2014-03-03 01:20:32 PM  
I'm pretty sure you can call it anything you like, and that's without laying down a cent.
 
2014-03-03 01:22:36 PM  
Starting Wednesday, anybody with an Internet connection and a few dollars to spare can give a moniker to one of the Red Planet's 500,000 or so unnamed craters, as part of a mapping project run by the space-funding company Uwingu

Don't waste your money.  My site starts Friday, and naming rights are 50% lower than Uwingu.

We will not be undersold.
 
2014-03-03 01:25:00 PM  
Ray Bradbury
 
2014-03-03 01:37:00 PM  

Marcus Aurelius: Starting Wednesday, anybody with an Internet connection and a few dollars to spare can give a moniker to one of the Red Planet's 500,000 or so unnamed craters, as part of a mapping project run by the space-funding company Uwingu

Don't waste your money.  My site starts Friday, and naming rights are 50% lower than Uwingu.

We will not be undersold.


Will you let me pay you to name a star too? I've been saving up for a star.
 
2014-03-03 01:40:01 PM  

Bob Falfa: Marcus Aurelius: Starting Wednesday, anybody with an Internet connection and a few dollars to spare can give a moniker to one of the Red Planet's 500,000 or so unnamed craters, as part of a mapping project run by the space-funding company Uwingu

Don't waste your money.  My site starts Friday, and naming rights are 50% lower than Uwingu.

We will not be undersold.

Will you let me pay you to name a star too? I've been saving up for a star.


A star is a bit more expensive, because there's more overhead involved.
 
2014-03-03 01:49:14 PM  
Zodanga
 
2014-03-03 02:07:25 PM  
Kuato
 
FNG [TotalFark]
2014-03-03 02:13:45 PM  
Dig'Um
 
2014-03-03 02:15:52 PM  
Whoopie Goldbergs poophole 2
 
2014-03-03 03:40:19 PM  
Clearasil Failure.
 
2014-03-03 03:49:40 PM  
 Tim.
 
2014-03-03 04:53:37 PM  
Expensive
 
2014-03-03 04:53:57 PM  
Tara Reid
 
2014-03-03 04:55:01 PM  
Galt's Gulch
 
2014-03-03 04:55:26 PM  
Marvin
 
2014-03-03 04:55:29 PM  
Dickleshiats
 
2014-03-03 04:55:42 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: Ray Bradbury


Close.

Green Bluff.
 
2014-03-03 04:55:55 PM  
buy the deepest, widest one and name it Subby's Mom.

Duh.
 
2014-03-03 04:56:30 PM  
Titty Sprinkles.
 
2014-03-03 04:57:10 PM  
Betty White's Dusty Vagina
 
2014-03-03 04:57:13 PM  
Shiathead
 
2014-03-03 04:57:25 PM  
Next Stop, Uranus.
 
2014-03-03 04:58:02 PM  
UFIA
 
2014-03-03 04:58:38 PM  

Marcus Aurelius: I'm pretty sure you can call it anything you like, and that's without laying down a cent.


gifrific.com
 
2014-03-03 04:59:20 PM  
New Utah. See if we can't get them to spread out.
 
2014-03-03 04:59:38 PM  
Jebediah Kerman memorial impact zone.
 
2014-03-03 05:00:22 PM  
Krater

Misspelling makes it extreme
 
das
2014-03-03 05:00:43 PM  
Marvin
 
2014-03-03 05:01:35 PM  

Life_is_a_carnivore: Marvin


Thank you.
I was sure this would be the first.
 
2014-03-03 05:03:01 PM  
Grables Daughter
 
2014-03-03 05:03:02 PM  
Oatmeal?
i1.ytimg.com
 
2014-03-03 05:04:35 PM  
Weedlord Bonerhitler or in honor of your mother.
 
2014-03-03 05:04:56 PM  
Thomas Tusser crater.

Obscure?
 
2014-03-03 05:08:11 PM  
I'm not sure.  But I know what I'd name a mountain on Venus.
 
2014-03-03 05:08:30 PM  
I'd name it "You can't legitimately buy land on extra-terrestrial objects crater; and anybody who says different is selling snake oil".
 
2014-03-03 05:09:42 PM  

Life_is_a_carnivore: Marvin


Was going to say Marvin Gardens.
 
2014-03-03 05:09:53 PM  
MC-1
 
2014-03-03 05:10:05 PM  
"Florida"
 
2014-03-03 05:10:28 PM  
crater
 
2014-03-03 05:11:20 PM  
Fire Crotch II: Lindsay Lohan's Intergalactic Va-jay-jay of Doom
 
2014-03-03 05:11:45 PM  
Gale?
Refriger Crater Perry?
 
2014-03-03 05:12:16 PM  
Another vote for Marvin here
 
2014-03-03 05:12:22 PM  
Ummmmm, Jake....from State Farm.
 
2014-03-03 05:12:37 PM  
I will name him George, and I will hug him and pet him and squeeze him...
 
2014-03-03 05:13:06 PM  
Valentine Michael Smith
 
2014-03-03 05:15:50 PM  

macross87: I will name him George, and I will hug him and pet him and squeeze him...


And love him.. :)

that and the earth shattering kaboom disappointment are my favorite Marvin moments
 
2014-03-03 05:16:20 PM  
I would name mine "Joe Peanut is a farking idiot!"
 
2014-03-03 05:17:35 PM  

Mikey1969: Bathia_Mapes: Ray Bradbury

Close.

Green Bluff.


Father Stone
 
2014-03-03 05:17:55 PM  
If the moon was made of green cheese, would you eat it?
 
2014-03-03 05:19:34 PM  

Carn: If the moon was made of green cheese, would you eat it?


What about if it was made of spare ribs?
 
2014-03-03 05:21:07 PM  
CAN-D Crater
 
2014-03-03 05:22:08 PM  
Wrong hole

/There is no wrong hole.
 
2014-03-03 05:22:49 PM  

kaseyfarksdaladies: Wrong hole

/There is no wrong hole.


my hole is the wrong hole!
 
2014-03-03 05:23:47 PM  
Money Pit?
 
2014-03-03 05:23:57 PM  
Klatzyxamberjomberzooberangerongerunderandalasblapt.
 
2014-03-03 05:24:19 PM  
I shall name this crater "Mushroom Stamp"

Make of that what you will. :)
 
2014-03-03 05:24:32 PM  
Sasha Grey
 
2014-03-03 05:24:59 PM  
Brooklyn's Second Biggest Pothole
 
2014-03-03 05:25:07 PM  
Should we name it after a public figure, such as Linda Thompson or Joe Paterno?

Someone wants to name a crater "Sandusky's Enabler"?
 
2014-03-03 05:27:03 PM  
The Eve Plumb Memorial Martian Martian Martian Crater
 
2014-03-03 05:27:32 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: Ray Bradbury


so Much this.
 
2014-03-03 05:28:12 PM  

Cpl.D: Jebediah Kerman memorial impact zone.


id chip in a few bucks
 
2014-03-03 05:28:50 PM  

Carn: If the moon was made of green cheese, would you eat it?


i1.ytimg.com

I know I would.  It would be delicious!
 
2014-03-03 05:30:25 PM  
Spleesh, there's only one possible answer!

img.fark.net
 
2014-03-03 05:30:56 PM  

theorellior: Klatzyxamberjomberzooberangerongerunderandalasblapt.


OK, we'll call it Bill.
 
2014-03-03 05:32:11 PM  

Helen Mirren's Titties

 
2014-03-03 05:33:20 PM  
(My ex-Girlfriend's name here) Farkhole?
 
2014-03-03 05:37:29 PM  

Cpl.D: Jebediah Kerman memorial impact zone.


He died as he lived... traveling towards the ground at 4,000 m/s.

Jebediah Kerman, Thrill-Seeker
 
2014-03-03 05:40:13 PM  
Buttpipe Crater
 
2014-03-03 05:41:16 PM  
Your mom's butthole
 
2014-03-03 05:42:02 PM  
Barsoom
 
2014-03-03 05:42:32 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: Ray Bradbury


And we have a winner.
 
2014-03-03 05:43:13 PM  
Goatse Crater.
 
2014-03-03 05:48:26 PM  
Bob
 
2014-03-03 05:53:10 PM  
Cazzo, just like the Pope would want
 
2014-03-03 05:54:01 PM  
Are "POO" and "ASS" already taken?
 
2014-03-03 05:55:51 PM  

TheShavingofOccam123: The Eve Plumb Memorial Martian Martian Martian Crater


+10
 
2014-03-03 06:02:57 PM  

busy chillin': buy the deepest, widest one and name it Subby's Mom.

Duh.


In similar vein, I was thinking "Mater Tua".
 
2014-03-03 06:09:28 PM  
Kim Kardashian's Ass.

Similar in size and equally bumpy.
 
2014-03-03 06:15:14 PM  
Pockmark Point.
 
2014-03-03 06:15:43 PM  
Goatse?
 
2014-03-03 06:16:41 PM  
Crimea.
 
2014-03-03 06:17:52 PM  
No love for Ray Walston?
 
2014-03-03 06:18:27 PM  
John.

What?

You never heard of John Crater of Mars?
 
2014-03-03 06:26:38 PM  
Podkayne.

Willis.

('Valentine Michael Smith', 'Marvin', and 'Ray Walston' were already nominated, and 'J'onn J'onzz' is too lame.)

Hmmm...  How 'bout 'Grovers Mills'?  Then WE can invade THEM?

(Either way, if I'm buying a crater, I want the one with the Shadow Ship at the bottom...  Or do I?)
 
2014-03-03 06:30:08 PM  

Nicholas D. Wolfwood: 'J'onn J'onzz' is too lame.


You shut your mouth.
 
2014-03-03 06:30:44 PM  
I think it would be disrespectful to name it in anything other than the Martian language.
 
2014-03-03 06:31:26 PM  
Your Mom.
 
2014-03-03 06:33:56 PM  
HOME.
 
2014-03-03 06:40:31 PM  
The Martian Manhandler: You shut your mouth.

Hey, now!  I *like* Martian Manhunter!  Heck, I was reading him back when he was a backup feature, chasing 'The Idol Head of Diabolu' every month!  'Martian Manhunter' was a great name, and a great concept, but 'John Jones'?

It's just that back then, in the Julius Schwartz / Mort Weisinger era, DC's character naming was lame, and there's no other way to describe it.

'Matter Eater Lad', from the planet 'Bismoll'?

'Bouncing Boy'?  I rest my case.
 
2014-03-03 06:56:07 PM  
Courtney.
 
2014-03-03 07:03:37 PM  
Winston niles Rutherford
 
2014-03-03 07:19:25 PM  
Otisburg
 
2014-03-03 07:33:38 PM  

Torgo_of_Manos: Otisburg


Ms. Tessmacher!
 
2014-03-03 07:49:54 PM  
I'd get 2 and name them after my kids
 
2014-03-03 08:28:47 PM  

Iszael: I'd get 2 and name them after my kids


Jose and Jos-b?  Monique and Unique?
 
2014-03-03 08:38:47 PM  

4seasons85!: Bob


Dang it I wanted that one.
 
2014-03-03 08:44:48 PM  
ts4.explicit.bing.net
Bung Hole
 
2014-03-03 08:57:31 PM  
"Jebediah Kerman memorial impact zone."

I've got 2 permanent bases on the Mun and been to Minmus a couple times. Duna is a really Long way off though. I haven't even begun to try out how big of a ship it'll take to get there yet. That's a Scary long distance. Gives you an Appreciation of what the Real Rocket Scientists are doing. KSP has gotten me wrapped up in a game like I haven't been for Years! Loads of Fun and you Learn things too!

I looked at this Mars site last week, only $5 for a small crater. I might do it for myself and for a gal who's really into "The Big Bang Theory" a little while later just for the heck of it. I'd make some points with here for it for only 5 bucks, why not?
 
2014-03-03 08:57:43 PM  
"Jebediah Kerman memorial impact zone."

I've got 2 permanent bases on the Mun and been to Minmus a couple times. Duna is a really Long way off though. I haven't even begun to try out how big of a ship it'll take to get there yet. That's a Scary long distance. Gives you an Appreciation of what the Real Rocket Scientists are doing. KSP has gotten me wrapped up in a game like I haven't been for Years! Loads of Fun and you Learn things too!

I looked at this Mars site last week, only $5 for a small crater. I might do it for myself and for a gal who's really into "The Big Bang Theory" a little while later just for the heck of it. I'd make some points with her for it for only 5 bucks, why not?
 
2014-03-03 09:40:51 PM  
Steve.

I name a lot of things Steve.
 
2014-03-03 09:47:40 PM  

Lapdance: "Jebediah Kerman memorial impact zone."

I've got 2 permanent bases on the Mun and been to Minmus a couple times. Duna is a really Long way off though. I haven't even begun to try out how big of a ship it'll take to get there yet. That's a Scary long distance. Gives you an Appreciation of what the Real Rocket Scientists are doing. KSP has gotten me wrapped up in a game like I haven't been for Years! Loads of Fun and you Learn things too!

I looked at this Mars site last week, only $5 for a small crater. I might do it for myself and for a gal who's really into "The Big Bang Theory" a little while later just for the heck of it. I'd make some points with her for it for only 5 bucks, why not?


Nobody who actually eventually goes to mars will ever actually call these craters by their consumer-given names. They're not going to be mapped elsewhere with those names, they're not recognized by anybody but the people selling the "naming rights."

It's like someone selling you a cubic meter of air.

You could have had the exact same product for free. They're selling the ability to say "I paid $5 to name a crater Jim."

Just like the "Name a star!" bullshiat, nobody actually uses, knows, or cares about the names people gave to them through various star naming schemes.
 
2014-03-03 10:47:11 PM  

Lapdance: "Jebediah Kerman memorial impact zone."

I've got 2 permanent bases on the Mun and been to Minmus a couple times. Duna is a really Long way off though. I haven't even begun to try out how big of a ship it'll take to get there yet. That's a Scary long distance. Gives you an Appreciation of what the Real Rocket Scientists are doing. KSP has gotten me wrapped up in a game like I haven't been for Years! Loads of Fun and you Learn things too!

I looked at this Mars site last week, only $5 for a small crater. I might do it for myself and for a gal who's really into "The Big Bang Theory" a little while later just for the heck of it. I'd make some points with her for it for only 5 bucks, why not?


Duna?

i.imgur.com
Also, yeah.  Save your five bucks.  The IAU does the naming.  Even if you spent a hundred bucks naming a crater or star, that name will never show up on any map.  Because the company is not the IAU.  What you're actually getting is a fancy piece of paper in a frame that shows you spent five bucks on something.  That's about it.
 
2014-03-03 11:15:06 PM  
Subby's mom's cooter.
 
2014-03-04 01:28:22 AM  
Orifice Number One
 
2014-03-04 07:15:02 AM  
Curtains

"Someday this will all be yours."

"What? The curtains?"
 
2014-03-04 10:52:01 AM  

LowbrowDeluxe: I'm not sure.  But I know what I'd name a mountain on Venus.


Mons Veneris?
 
2014-03-04 01:30:38 PM  

The Martian Manhandler: No love for Ray Walston?


He was my favorite.
 
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