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(Golf.com)   Tiger Woods quits golf   (golf.com) divider line 40
    More: Unlikely, Tiger Woods, match play, Torrey Pines, wood finishing, The Players Championship, bogey, Doral, Caddyshack  
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3962 clicks; posted to Sports » on 03 Mar 2014 at 1:08 PM (37 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



40 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-03-03 01:10:04 PM  
He's just silly.
 
2014-03-03 01:20:13 PM  
At least he has the balls to admit it's over unlike Lance Armstrong
 
2014-03-03 01:22:14 PM  
The man is worth like $800 million dollars and bangs random hot blondes like they grow on trees

I think he can do whatever he wants now
 
2014-03-03 01:28:47 PM  
Cool.
Can we stop hearing about him now?
 
2014-03-03 01:31:02 PM  
I was surprised he went down like this on Sunday.

I was at the tournament on Saturday and he looked like he was poised to overtake Rory for the lead on Sunday if Rory peed down his leg.

I got it half right.
 
2014-03-03 01:35:06 PM  

Smeggy Smurf: At least he has the balls to admit it's over unlike Lance Armstrong

 
2014-03-03 01:58:28 PM  
No such luck.
 
2014-03-03 02:00:26 PM  
umm, he withdrew from one event due to back spasms.  He didn't quit golf subby.
 
2014-03-03 02:09:18 PM  
"Just Like Tiger Woods"

If you don't golf that's okay
You can be a tiger anyway
Laugh through your teeth when things gets tough
Or your balls are gonna wind up in the rough, yeah yeah

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods
Fertilize the ladies in the neighborhood
Get real rich and you will find
All the hot chicks will want to grind

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods
Grip that shaft like you know you should
Get a platinum card, it will be all good
The girls will want you just like Tiger Woods

Remember this when you're having fun
Three holes are better than a hole in one, yeah
If the word gets out don't be afraid
When a 9 iron's heading for your escalade, yeah yeah
If you wanna be like Tiger Woods
Filling all the divots in the neighbourhood
Don't think about those three foot putts
You cover your tracks when you're banging them sluts

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods
Text messages are never good
Nail a girl at the driving range
Your life will change, just like Tiger Woods

Have your best friend book all your flights
Tell your wife that you're golfing nights
Get a call girl and maybe just chill
Be willing to part with a hundred mil

Bang a new porn star every day
Tell your sponsors it will be okay
Surprise them all with an invitation
To a viewing of your first double penetration, yeah

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods
Poking all the holes in the neighborhood
Tell your wife how it's gonna be
Your driver is community property

If you wanna be like Tiger Woods

Become the king of your neighborhood
Like Steel Panther and Tiger Woods

Just like Tiger Woods, oh yeah yeah
 
2014-03-03 02:20:10 PM  
Tiger, no! You just walked away from a  guaranteed $12K even if you'd finished last! What were you thinking, you fool? You're never going to make it in golf if you're not willing to make a few sacrifices.

Don't come crying to me when you can't make the rent, you slacker.
 
2014-03-03 02:39:23 PM  
Tiger's only real concern is breaking Nicklaus's record.  I doubt if back problems will make him withdraw from a major tournament.
 
2014-03-03 02:52:23 PM  
Lower back issues are a motherfarker. I have something going on with mine and to try and stand up straight after doing something ordinary, like shaving, is a biatch. I should probably get that looked it. It has only been like this for a good 6 months.
 
2014-03-03 02:52:43 PM  
The end of that tournament more closely resembled the final lap at Darlington, metaphorically speaking.
 
2014-03-03 02:54:30 PM  
This is a physical, not a mental issue.  Some golfers acquire back issues.

See Couples, Fred.

yelmrog: Tiger's only real concern is breaking Nicklaus's record.  I doubt if back problems will make him withdraw from a major tournament.


Not on Sunday with a shot at the lead.  But there's no reason to risk injury for what is really a February tournament.  Most of America hasn't even brought their clubs out of the garage.
 
2014-03-03 03:13:03 PM  
Has anyone dropped out of more fields than Tiger?  It just seems like he has more than anyone but it could just be the media microscope...
 
2014-03-03 03:16:21 PM  
Bad knees. Bad back. Maybe he swings too hard.
 
2014-03-03 03:36:25 PM  
It is hard to think that he would pull out and not play as many holes as possible now that he is single.
 
2014-03-03 03:37:17 PM  

TheShavingofOccam123: Bad knees. Bad back. Maybe he swings too hard.


Maybe he put on too much damn muscle instead of working on his swing. He's a dumbass. I'm one of the bigger Tiger supporters on Fark, but I can't see him doing much of anything this year
 
2014-03-03 03:38:24 PM  

JusticeandIndependence: umm, he withdrew from one event due to back spasms.  He didn't quit golf subby.


He's withdrawn from 2 events now. Withdrawing after the cut is always a shiathead move.
 
2014-03-03 03:44:37 PM  

TheShavingofOccam123: Bad knees. Bad back. Maybe he swings too hard.


Let's leave his sex life out of this and stick to the golf talk.
 
2014-03-03 03:46:56 PM  

Primitive Screwhead: TheShavingofOccam123: Bad knees. Bad back. Maybe he swings too hard.

Let's leave his sex life out of this and stick to the golf talk.


Good idea. I don't like talking about my short game.
 
2014-03-03 03:55:52 PM  
The road to the Masters got off to a bumpy start Sunday for Tiger Woods when he withdrew from the Honda Classic with what he said was a lower back injury.

I'll give him this much... Playing golf with a bad back would not only be a royal biatch-kitty, it would fark up your entire swing. I don't really give two shiats about Tiger Woods, but I can totally buy this as a reason to quit playing for awhile, although the story doesn't imply that he's quitting for good...
 
2014-03-03 04:00:52 PM  
He's going to need a steroid injection.
 
2014-03-03 04:09:44 PM  
Rory learned a valuable lesson Sunday: when you're playing like crap and want to quit, remember that "back spasms"=GOOD but "wisdom teeth"=BAD.
 
2014-03-03 04:30:51 PM  

merfnablin: The man is worth like $800 million dollars and bangs random hot blondes like they grow on trees

I think he can do whatever he wants now


Anything he wants besides win major golf tournaments. Oh well he a bunch in years gone by. he can remember those until he qualifies for the Senior tour.I think he will set new records on the Senior tour.
 
2014-03-03 04:47:55 PM  
Did they just call off the rest of the tournament after Tiger withdrew? Because the sports reportrer didntt really mention other golfers except to say that Rory as leading when Tiger left.
 
2014-03-03 05:15:08 PM  

mikaloyd: Oh well he a bunch in years gone by.


He accidentally the whole thing?
 
2014-03-03 05:19:14 PM  

SirDigbyChickenCaesar: Has anyone dropped out of more fields than Tiger?  It just seems like he has more than anyone but it could just be the media microscope...


John Daly has quit around 20 times.
 
2014-03-03 05:21:06 PM  

AliceBToklasLives: This is a physical, not a mental issue.  Some golfers acquire back issues.

See Couples, Fred.

yelmrog: Tiger's only real concern is breaking Nicklaus's record.  I doubt if back problems will make him withdraw from a major tournament.

Not on Sunday with a shot at the lead.  But there's no reason to risk injury for what is really a February tournament.  Most of America hasn't even brought their clubs out of the garage.


Silly boy. If it's Sunday at a major   and he doesn't have the lead he ain't winning.

/at least so far
 
2014-03-03 05:21:58 PM  
PALM BEACH GARDENS, Fla. (AP) --- The road to the Masters got off to a bumpy start Sunday for Tiger Woods when he withdrew from the Honda Classic a scabby Denny's waitress with what he said was a lower back hang-down injury.
 
2014-03-03 05:35:18 PM  

fatalvenom: I was surprised he went down like this on Sunday.

I was at the tournament on Saturday and he looked like he was poised to overtake Rory for the lead on Sunday if Rory peed down his leg.

I got it half right.


Tiger ain't winning no major unless he's in the lead at the start of Sunday.
 
2014-03-03 05:42:01 PM  

sotua: fatalvenom: I was surprised he went down like this on Sunday.

I was at the tournament on Saturday and he looked like he was poised to overtake Rory for the lead on Sunday if Rory peed down his leg.

I got it half right.

Tiger ain't winning no major unless he's in the lead at the start of Sunday.


Honda Classic isn't a major.
 
2014-03-03 05:47:49 PM  

fatalvenom: sotua: fatalvenom: I was surprised he went down like this on Sunday.

I was at the tournament on Saturday and he looked like he was poised to overtake Rory for the lead on Sunday if Rory peed down his leg.

I got it half right.

Tiger ain't winning no major unless he's in the lead at the start of Sunday.

Honda Classic isn't a major.


Unless you're Tiger Woods and you leave with back pain.
Then it's a major fu(k-up.

/I'll be here all week
 
2014-03-03 05:58:10 PM  

Primitive Screwhead: fatalvenom: sotua: fatalvenom: I was surprised he went down like this on Sunday.

I was at the tournament on Saturday and he looked like he was poised to overtake Rory for the lead on Sunday if Rory peed down his leg.

I got it half right.

Tiger ain't winning no major unless he's in the lead at the start of Sunday.

Honda Classic isn't a major.

Unless you're Tiger Woods and you leave with back pain.
Then it's a major fu(k-up.

/I'll be here all week


It's just too easy for him to pull-out (no pun intended) of a tournament when he lives less than 10 miles from the course.

Hell I remember when he pulled out of Doral a year or two back and they had helicopters following his S-class Benz all the way up the Turnpike to Jupiter Island. That was an hour and a half ride. It was like a much less interesting OJ chase.
 
2014-03-03 06:15:42 PM  
If I was banging chicks in such quantity as him, I'd be having back spasms too.
 
2014-03-03 06:44:53 PM  

stevenvictx: If I was banging chicksLindsey Vonn in such quantity as him, I'd be having back spasms, hernias, dislocated bones, torn ACL/MCL, and severe dehydration too.


FTFM
blog.outdoornation.org
i2.cdn.turner.com
 
2014-03-03 07:26:02 PM  

soopey: stevenvictx: If I was banging chicksLindsey Vonn in such quantity as him, I'd be having back spasms, hernias, dislocated bones, torn ACL/MCL, and severe dehydration too.

FTFM
[blog.outdoornation.org image 600x800]
[i2.cdn.turner.com image 640x360]


Something about penalty strokes in the back nine?
 
2014-03-04 12:22:09 AM  

smerfnablin: The man is worth like $800 million dollars and bangs random hot blondes like they grow on trees

I think he can do whatever he wants now


This.
 
2014-03-04 07:05:46 AM  
There is such a thing as being in 'too good of shape' in golf.  He's bulked up like some steroid infused WWE clown.  Great for magazine covers, bad for golf. His swing is so farked up.  There is no fluidity to it.

He'll never catch Jack.
 
2014-03-04 10:23:56 AM  

Lt. Cheese Weasel: There is such a thing as being in 'too good of shape' in golf.  He's bulked up like some steroid infused WWE clown.  Great for magazine covers, bad for golf. His swing is so farked up.  There is no fluidity to it.

He'll never catch Jack.


I noticed that too. I remember seeing him when he started and he was just this skinny guy that had a great swing. It seems like after the bulk up it went to shiat.
 
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