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(Courier-Journal)   And Lo, Jesus said unto the Apostles: "Set upon them with the AK-47. Slay ye every last one of them, and I shall sort them out. So sayeth the Lord"   (courier-journal.com) divider line 94
    More: Scary, Christ, Kentucky, 2nd amendment, Outdoor Channel  
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10030 clicks; posted to Main » on 03 Mar 2014 at 12:54 PM (24 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



94 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-03-03 12:55:40 PM
Another Ukrainian story?

*click link*

Oh
 
2014-03-03 12:57:11 PM
I'd take a free AK, have you seen how much they go for nowadays?
 
2014-03-03 12:58:05 PM
If human history shows us anything, it's that religious fundamentalism and guns are always a great combination.
 
2014-03-03 12:58:17 PM
Subby makes Jesus sound like a pirate for a little bit.

/I bet Jesus woulda been an AWESOME pirate.
//pirate Jesus would plunder your soul
 
2014-03-03 12:58:58 PM
Good thing there's never been accidental discharge in a church
 
2014-03-03 01:00:02 PM

duffblue: I'd take a free AK, have you seen how much they go for nowadays?


This.
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2014-03-03 01:02:14 PM

lordjupiter: Good thing there's never been accidental discharge in a church


Is this a "sex in church" joke?
 
2014-03-03 01:02:49 PM
I'd take the free gun and send back pictures of it with its new stock/grips featuring, Baphomet, the Flying Spaghetti Monster or Ayat al-Kursi
 
2014-03-03 01:03:45 PM

Vodka Zombie: If human history shows us anything, it's that religious fundamentalism and guns are always a great combination.


Any -ism with guns is a sure-fire recipe for happy-happy-fun-time
 
2014-03-03 01:04:05 PM
On the plus side, there's a significant chance those guns will kill their white-trash red state owners.
 
2014-03-03 01:05:20 PM
They didn't mention the part, about you having to handle the snakes, before you get the AK.

/Always read the fine print.  Always!!
 
2014-03-03 01:06:18 PM
i61.tinypic.com

/oblig
 
2014-03-03 01:06:19 PM
It was sometime after 9/11 when patriotism and religion got in bed with each other.
And it has been downhill ever since.

Cuz we all know that Jesus carried an AK-47 to make his dick feel big and ready.
Right?
 
2014-03-03 01:07:17 PM
Would it be okay to use a Jesus poster as target practice?
 
2014-03-03 01:07:59 PM
Guns For God
Bullets For Buddha
Firearms For Flying Spaghetti Monster
Gats For Ganesha
Weapons For Westboro
 
2014-03-03 01:08:00 PM
What kind if church is this??? My Jesus would never use a commie gun designed by Nikolai HUSSEIN Kalashnikov!
 
2014-03-03 01:09:20 PM

the_end_is_rear: It was sometime after 9/11 when patriotism and religion got in bed with each other.
And it has been downhill ever since.

Cuz we all know that Jesus carried an AK-47 to make his dick feel big and ready.
Right?


This has been going on since the 50s, man, with the modern Republican party anyway.  Since forever otherwise.

i60.tinypic.com
 
2014-03-03 01:10:22 PM
Christ what assholes
 
2014-03-03 01:11:44 PM

JesusJuice: On the plus side, there's a significant chance those guns will kill their white-trash red state owners.


Doubtful.  a 17 HMR (as shown in TFA) is not exactly at the pinnacle of armor-piercing, assault-weaponing power.  Its a squirrel gun.
 
2014-03-03 01:12:00 PM

Carn: the_end_is_rear: It was sometime after 9/11 when patriotism and religion got in bed with each other.
And it has been downhill ever since.

Cuz we all know that Jesus carried an AK-47 to make his dick feel big and ready.
Right?

This has been going on since the 50s, man, with the modern Republican party anyway.  Since forever otherwise.

[i60.tinypic.com image 400x287]


Ahhhhh yikes. Too true.
I stand corrected.
 
2014-03-03 01:14:17 PM
Christianity: The only religion that will mold and modify itself as a marketing tactic in order to gain converts. For example: Christian Goth, Jews for Jesus, Christian Hardcore, and so on.

If honesty about your religious beliefs isn't palatable enough for another person to accept them as your own faith, that you have to modify your image or even your doctrine to get butts in the pews, then it isn't a religion at all but instead it's a fraud.
 
2014-03-03 01:14:19 PM
Damn...  All I ever got was a bible, a stale oyster cracker, and a shot glass of watered down grape juice...
 
2014-03-03 01:15:44 PM
the Kentucky Baptist Convention is leading "Second Amendment Celebrations,"

Because everybody knows the US constitution is a religious document worthy of religious celebrations.

/The US Bible belt: home of armed Christians.
 
2014-03-03 01:17:17 PM

DarkSoulNoHope: Christianity: The only religion that will mold and modify itself as a marketing tactic in order to gain converts. For example: Christian Goth, Jews for Jesus, Christian Hardcore, and so on.


Lol, No.
 
2014-03-03 01:17:28 PM
Kentucky? Should have just used cigarettes as an incentive. Everyone in the state smokes and theyre at least a little cheaper.
 
2014-03-03 01:17:53 PM
Christ died on a cross so his chosen people, the Americans, could have guns. After all, the Second Amendment was copied verbatim from the Gospel.
 
2014-03-03 01:19:26 PM

capt.hollister: /The US Bible belt: home of armed Christians.


Pretty sure they can be found all over the place.
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-03-03 01:19:45 PM
So the stupid trailer trash inbred wingnut evangelical cowards are using the promise of violence to lure in other stupid trailer trash inbred wingnut evangelical cowards? All that fear must come from being forever cursed with tiny little Republican penises.
 
2014-03-03 01:20:33 PM
If you need giveaways and tent events like a used car dealership, you probably have a pretty crappy god.
 
2014-03-03 01:22:44 PM

cubic_spleen: So the stupid trailer trash inbred wingnut evangelical cowards are using the promise of violence to lure in other stupid trailer trash inbred wingnut evangelical cowards? All that fear must come from being forever cursed with tiny little Republican penises.


That will just about fill out any gun-grabber bingo card all in two sentences.  Well done, sir.
 
2014-03-03 01:23:08 PM

Stop going to church for a few years and suddenly they start putting the fun back in fundamentalism.



/this might get me out of bed on Sundays.
/...well, maybe, cause I do love sleeping in more than slaying sinners.
 
2014-03-03 01:23:42 PM
I'd take a good blaster over some hokey religion any day.
 
2014-03-03 01:24:17 PM
John 18:

11
Jesus commanded Peter, "Take out your sword! I care not for the cup that my Father has prepared for me, so let us prepare to kick some ass.  Freedom!!!"

12Then the detachment of soldiers with its commander and the Jewish officials were slain by Jesus and His apostles. And there was celebration throughout the hearts of Jesus and his soldiers, as the hills of Gethsemane ran red with blood.
 
2014-03-03 01:24:19 PM

the_end_is_rear: Carn: the_end_is_rear: It was sometime after 9/11 when patriotism and religion got in bed with each other.
And it has been downhill ever since.

Cuz we all know that Jesus carried an AK-47 to make his dick feel big and ready.
Right?

This has been going on since the 50s, man, with the modern Republican party anyway.  Since forever otherwise.

[i60.tinypic.com image 400x287]

Ahhhhh yikes. Too true.
I stand corrected.


Yeah.  During the Cold War, religion was the thing most Americans glommed onto in order to separate themselves from those "godless commies."  And, for the most part, up until Reagan started his craven pandering to them, it had a somewhat distant relationship with our politicians.

Sadly, after 9/11, religion in America went from simply being something "patriotically correct" to becoming the foundation of our current wave of insane Nationalism and twisted sense of exceptionalism.

So, yeah.  You're partly right.
 
2014-03-03 01:28:48 PM
Looks like A&E has a new reality show. This one will be easier to name.
 
2014-03-03 01:29:38 PM
Consult the Book of Armaments!
 
2014-03-03 01:31:05 PM

the_end_is_rear: Carn: the_end_is_rear: It was sometime after 9/11 when patriotism and religion got in bed with each other.
And it has been downhill ever since.

Cuz we all know that Jesus carried an AK-47 to make his dick feel big and ready.
Right?

This has been going on since the 50s, man, with the modern Republican party anyway.  Since forever otherwise.

[i60.tinypic.com image 400x287]

Ahhhhh yikes. Too true.
I stand corrected.


No worries man, no demerits for being an optimist.
 
2014-03-03 01:32:24 PM
a personal relationship with Jesus Christ?

/i'm unclear on how this is possible
 
2014-03-03 01:33:33 PM

Carn: the_end_is_rear: It was sometime after 9/11 when patriotism and religion got in bed with each other.
And it has been downhill ever since.

Cuz we all know that Jesus carried an AK-47 to make his dick feel big and ready.
Right?

This has been going on since the 50s, man, with the modern Republican party anyway.  Since forever otherwise.

[i60.tinypic.com image 400x287]


...obviously a RINO

Goldwater was a role model for Ronald Reagan (who privately shared BG's opinion toward christian fundamentalists), suggested the use of nuclear weapons in Viet Nam, and uttered the famous "extremism in defense of liberty..." line.  Yet even he, "Mr Conservative," recognized that there was no place for zealots like these in government.
 
2014-03-03 01:35:15 PM

HeadLever: DarkSoulNoHope: Christianity: The only religion that will mold and modify itself as a marketing tactic in order to gain converts. For example: Christian Goth, Jews for Jesus, Christian Hardcore, and so on.

Lol, No.


So one nearly empty website supposedly "proves your point" while Christianity has been shown to use massive amounts of funding and people to attempt to convert people to it's religion. I think you're slipping in your troll tactics.

Here are some websites for you:

http://www.christiangoth.com/

http://www.jewsforjesus.org/

http://www.answering-islam.org/

This is the closest "Messianic Jewish Synagogue" to my town: www.bethzion.org

Hipster Christianity too thanks to the son of Tammy Faye and Jim Bakker: http://www.startribune.com/lifestyle/201789551.html

Christians do this to gain butts in pews, because they know their beliefs aren't palatable to anyone once that person thinks about it, so Christians instead try tricking people with commonalities and peer pressure because honesty doesn't fill the collection plate at the end of the service.
 
2014-03-03 01:35:16 PM

cubic_spleen: So the stupid trailer trash inbred wingnut evangelical cowards are using the promise of violence to lure in other stupid trailer trash inbred wingnut evangelical cowards? All that fear must come from being forever cursed with tiny little Republican penises.


Wow...who peepee'd in your granola yogurt this morning...

Your fear is showing. Time for a little meditation and perhaps some chai tea...

Kisses!
 
2014-03-03 01:41:15 PM

the_end_is_rear: It was sometime after 9/11 when patriotism and religion got in bed with each other.
And it has been downhill ever since.

Cuz we all know that Jesus carried an AK-47 to make his dick feel big and ready.
Right?


Ah, yes, the obligatory Markley's Law violation.  Congratulations on being so [sarcasm] edgy and original [/sarcasm].
 
2014-03-03 01:46:45 PM

duffblue: I'd take a free AK, have you seen how much they go for nowadays?


I kick myself for not buying one in college, when one of the local gunstores had them for $275 a piece.
 
2014-03-03 01:46:46 PM
FTFA: "In Louisville, he said, more than 500 people showed up on a snowy January day for a gun giveaway at Highview Baptist Church, and 61 made decisions to seek salvation."

I wonder how that compares to the conversion rate for those fancy breakfasts/receptions that timeshare places like to host for non-owner guests.
 
2014-03-03 01:47:39 PM

dpzum1: cubic_spleen: So the stupid trailer trash inbred wingnut evangelical cowards are using the promise of violence to lure in other stupid trailer trash inbred wingnut evangelical cowards? All that fear must come from being forever cursed with tiny little Republican penises.

Wow...who peepee'd in your granola yogurt this morning...

Your fear is showing. Time for a little meditation and perhaps some chai tea...

Kisses!


Republicans, sir. Republicans peepee'd in my granola yogurt. I must remember to stay away from the Depends changing stations at CPAC.
 
2014-03-03 01:53:42 PM

DarkSoulNoHope: So one nearly empty website supposedly "proves your point"


Yep.  It does prove that Christianity is not the "only" (notice the proper use of quotation marks here) religion that does this.  If you want more, you can go search yourself.  Here is another one to get your ball rolling:

jews for the preservation of firearms ownership
 
2014-03-03 01:55:29 PM

bugmn99: What kind if church is this??? My Jesus would never use a commie gun designed by Nikolai HUSSEIN Kalashnikov!


Ah, but Gospodin Kalashnikov was merely echoing the work of our Lord and Savior, John Moses Browning, who was a Mormon.
 
2014-03-03 01:55:59 PM

duffblue: I'd take a free AK, have you seen how much they go for nowadays?


Holy crap yes! AK-47 was only produced for 10 years! That's a rare bird!

Idiot journalists.

I want a Ruger Ranch rifle.

DA DA DA! DA DA DAH! DA DA DA DA DAH DA DA DA DA DA!

With a black van with a red stripe and a spoiler.
 
2014-03-03 01:56:29 PM

DarkSoulNoHope: so Christians instead try tricking people with commonalities and peer pressure because honesty doesn't fill the collection plate at the end of the service.


You point is pretty much bunk because you can replace that bolded word with just about any other religion (or political party, charitable organization, environmental movement, etc) and still have a point.

They are no way the "only" entity that does this.
 
2014-03-03 02:05:13 PM

HeadLever: DarkSoulNoHope: So one nearly empty website supposedly "proves your point"

Yep.  It does prove that Christianity is not the "only" (notice the proper use of quotation marks here) religion that does this.  If you want more, you can go search yourself.  Here is another one to get your ball rolling:

jews for the preservation of firearms ownership


Are Jews trying to convert firearms owners to Judaism with this group? No.

HeadLever: You point is pretty much bunk because you can replace that bolded word with just about any other religion (or political party, charitable organization, environmental movement, etc) and still have a point.

They are no way the "only" entity that does this.


I said "Religion" not "Entity". You're trying to find anyway to continue your troll tactics I see.
 
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