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(Bleacher Report)   Hulk Hogan will be your host for Wrestlemania this year because FARK YOU that's why   (bleacherreport.com ) divider line
    More: Interesting, Hulk Hogan, WWE, WWE Hall of Fame, WWE Network  
•       •       •

506 clicks; posted to Sports » on 22 Feb 2014 at 9:54 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



49 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2014-02-22 09:14:18 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-22 09:23:24 AM  
Lame headline, Subby. Got to get a "brother" in there somewhere.
 
2014-02-22 09:45:02 AM  
i1182.photobucket.com
 
2014-02-22 09:53:27 AM  
Captain Steroid:

Yes, but Anime Punk took his PokeBall and went home.
 
2014-02-22 10:10:40 AM  
When he's dead, do you think they'll sign him to a new 5 year deal with a couple of guaranteed title runs for the corpse?

They could staple it to his waist.
 
2014-02-22 10:16:25 AM  

b.vimeocdn.com


This is it, man!  The time of total destruction has finally come.  Pearl Harbor may be long passed, but that won't stop this Yellow Bomber from comin' back to the WWE, brother!  All you little Hulkamaniacs out there who are now in your late-thirties: Put down your wives, say your prayers, take your once-a-day men's multivitamin specially formulated for people over the age of 45, and come take a ride on a pair of twenty-four-inch pythons as we take the new generation down a notch!  That means you, John "John" Cena!  That means you, Randy Orton!  That means you, Ronda Rousey!  You think your armbars and your Mount Fiji Death Pinch can stop me, but I've only lost one fight to a woman in the last ten years, and that was my ex-wife!  And I heard about a guy named Daniel Bryan!  Well, I beat The Undertaker, so what chance you got when I decide to bury you, man?  The last time I was supposed to fight someone under 115 pounds, I trapped him in a box, shipped him standard delivery, and they never heard from Billy Kidman again!  So get ready for the sixteenth coming of Hulk Hogan, man!  And that's all I got to say, because I'm running out of breath.  So whatcha gonna do, when Hulk Hogan and his one-loss record against women runs wild on YOU???
 
2014-02-22 10:20:02 AM  
you are all assholes and none of you have seen actual wrestling.
 
2014-02-22 10:25:27 AM  

soakitincider: you are all assholes and none of you have seen actual wrestling.


Is it still real to you?
 
2014-02-22 10:26:27 AM  

soakitincider: you are all assholes and none of you have seen actual wrestling.


No, but I have seen a few seconds of gay porn, so I figure I've got the gist of it.
 
2014-02-22 10:27:05 AM  

soakitincider: you are all assholes and none of you have seen actual wrestling.


NERD ALERT!
 
2014-02-22 10:28:52 AM  

soakitincider: you are all assholes and none of you have seen actual wrestling.


Did they take your jorb?

southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com
 
2014-02-22 10:32:48 AM  
So I am guessing he's broke or the ex wife is sucking the money out of his bank accounts again.
 
2014-02-22 10:37:13 AM  

Misconduc: So I am guessing he's broke or the ex wife is sucking the money out of his bank accounts again.


Actually the current roster sans a few can't draw a fly to shiat so vince needs him to sell wrestlemania and the network, which is fine by me BTW
 
2014-02-22 10:37:53 AM  
It's the perfect job for him.
 
2014-02-22 10:40:05 AM  
jorbs are real
 
2014-02-22 10:43:02 AM  
Does this mean he's coming our with a new line of meat shoes?
 
2014-02-22 10:45:28 AM  

machoprogrammer: soakitincider: you are all assholes and none of you have seen actual wrestling.

Did they take your jorb?

[southparkstudios.mtvnimages.com image 480x360]


wrasslin' is only for the most extreme, coolest guys ever.
 
2014-02-22 11:08:35 AM  
Well, at least now we know who's going to get the title after Bautista's run...

In the meantime, Vince commands us to enjoy the nWo as the tag team champs following the transition from the New Age Outlaws
 
2014-02-22 11:12:35 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-22 11:16:01 AM  
static.fjcdn.com
 
2014-02-22 11:51:29 AM  
This will put a lot of butts in the seats.
 
2014-02-22 11:53:32 AM  

jdjoker: This will put a lot of butts in the seats.


Vince said the same about Batista, only difference is this time he's right
 
2014-02-22 12:16:45 PM  

But Wait There's More: [i.imgur.com image 250x167]


Brother brother brother brother BROTHER BROTHER!
 
2014-02-22 12:18:09 PM  
Please tell me there'll be an Iron Sheik run-in?

Or at least a live feed to the asylum as the Ultimate Warrior writes out storylines in his own feces.
 
2014-02-22 12:18:53 PM  

Misconduc: So I am guessing he's broke or the ex wife is sucking the money out of his bank accounts again.

So I am guessing he's broke or the and Bubba's ex wife is sucking the money Hulkamania out of his bank accounts12 inch Python again.


 FTFY.......BROTHER!
 
2014-02-22 12:26:21 PM  

Mike_LowELL: [b.vimeocdn.com image 640x480]
This is it, man!  The time of total destruction has finally come.  Pearl Harbor may be long passed, but that won't stop this Yellow Bomber from comin' back to the WWE, brother!  All you little Hulkamaniacs out there who are now in your late-thirties: Put down your wives, say your prayers, take your once-a-day men's multivitamin specially formulated for people over the age of 45, and come take a ride on a pair of twenty-four-inch pythons as we take the new generation down a notch!  That means you, John "John" Cena!  That means you, Randy Orton!  That means you, Ronda Rousey!  You think your armbars and your Mount Fiji Death Pinch can stop me, but I've only lost one fight to a woman in the last ten years, and that was my ex-wife!  And I heard about a guy named Daniel Bryan!  Well, I beat The Undertaker, so what chance you got when I decide to bury you, man?  The last time I was supposed to fight someone under 115 pounds, I trapped him in a box, shipped him standard delivery, and they never heard from Billy Kidman again!  So get ready for the sixteenth coming of Hulk Hogan, man!  And that's all I got to say, because I'm running out of breath.  So whatcha gonna do, when Hulk Hogan and his one-loss record against women runs wild on YOU???


I'll just put this here because FNB nailed the response to this over a month ago... or did the Warrior channel himself through FNB?
 
2014-02-22 01:08:03 PM  

natural316: jdjoker: This will put a lot of butts in the seats.

Vince said the same about Batista, only difference is this time he's right


I'm still not sure if I meant it sarcastically or not.  You mentioned how a good portion of the current roster doesn't draw, and from the last few months the remedy seems to be turning back the clock - rehashing feuds from 10 years ago, re-creating stables from 15 years ago, and now bringing back the face of the company from 20-25 years ago.

The consensus I've seen in the threads here is that Creative doesn't really have a direction with the newer talent, so to me this looks like a surrender.  They know all the old angles and (hopefully) how and why they worked, so they're going to run them out there again for the current audience - with the exact same cast - and hope to turn a bunch of smarks back into marks.

Or maybe I found the Warrior's stash of crazy pills.
 
2014-02-22 01:30:47 PM  

Mike_LowELL:     And that's all I got to say, because I'm running out of breath.


Thanks for this one line.  It made the rant for me.

One of the things I've noticed as a long time wrestling fan is the habit of people to say that no one on the roster is a draw except a couple of top people and that no one gives a shiat about the mid-card.  Then 10, 20 years later they're all over themselves to talk about how awesome their favorite mid-carders were.

Yeah, one or two guys can draw money.  But a solid, well developed card draws more.
 
2014-02-22 01:43:21 PM  
Well that was something out of Days of Thunder.
 
2014-02-22 01:45:28 PM  
jdjoker:

The consensus I've seen in the threads here is that Creative doesn't really have a direction with the newer talent, so to me this looks like a surrender.  They know all the old angles and (hopefully) how and why they worked, so they're going to run them out there again for the current audience - with the exact same cast - and hope to turn a bunch of smarks back into marks.

Or maybe I found the Warrior's stash of crazy pills.


Actually that's pretty dead bang on, because Creative is made up of Aitches and a squad of tv writers.  There are no bookers in WWE anymore and no long term storylines.  Creative is literally writing for the next week and nothing else, hell they still don't have Mania fleshed out yet.  The rehashing of old angles is simply because they don't have time to come up with new ones.
 
2014-02-22 01:48:50 PM  
So Hogan ends the Wyatt fun or Cena?
 
2014-02-22 02:16:00 PM  
static.fjcdn.com

CM Punk is crying at the outrage, brother.
 
2014-02-22 03:08:29 PM  

Gunderson: [static.fjcdn.com image 450x303]

CM Punk is crying at the outrage, brother.


I want Punk to troll everyone in the end. Just wait until they need him back, and make as much money as a part timer who gets to highlight WM next year as he would have made working this whole year.
 
2014-02-22 03:26:32 PM  

TheManofPA: So Hogan ends the Wyatt fun or Cena?


I hope that wwe just pretends that the Wyatts screwing cena at the rumble never happened and it gets swept under the rug because I have no interest in seeing that match at mania
 
2014-02-22 03:28:37 PM  
well it should be more entertaining than when the Rock did it

/Rock seems like a cool guy, but that was a painful WM to watch
 
2014-02-22 03:39:06 PM  

Flappyhead: jdjoker:

The consensus I've seen in the threads here is that Creative doesn't really have a direction with the newer talent, so to me this looks like a surrender.  They know all the old angles and (hopefully) how and why they worked, so they're going to run them out there again for the current audience - with the exact same cast - and hope to turn a bunch of smarks back into marks.

Or maybe I found the Warrior's stash of crazy pills.

Actually that's pretty dead bang on, because Creative is made up of Aitches and a squad of tv writers.  There are no bookers in WWE anymore and no long term storylines.  Creative is literally writing for the next week and nothing else, hell they still don't have Mania fleshed out yet.  The rehashing of old angles is simply because they don't have time to come up with new ones.


I pretty much gave up watching wrestling in the 90s, Stone Cold, Macho Man, Rich Flair, The Rock, Hart gang, Michaels, etc

I loved the 80s and 90s characters, few weeks ago I turned on some Raw or whatever, and I couldn't stand 15 minutes of it. I thought there was a lack of charcters and storyline.

/Hacksaw Jim Duggin HOOO!
 
2014-02-22 04:10:42 PM  

natural316: TheManofPA: So Hogan ends the Wyatt fun or Cena?

I hope that wwe just pretends that the Wyatts screwing cena at the rumble never happened and it gets swept under the rug because I have no interest in seeing that match at mania


That's because you're not Vince.
 
2014-02-22 05:50:07 PM  

Tenor Reaper: well it should be more entertaining than when the Rock did it

/Rock seems like a cool guy, but that was a painful WM to watch


My thoughts exactly. By far the worst Mania I have seen live. Maybe some of the older ones I have seen replays of could have been worse but having not seen the buildup or story lines leading up to them I can't really say.

Thankfully the Raw show the next night made up for a lot!
 
2014-02-22 06:54:41 PM  
farking hell...

I was all but set on going to Wrestlemania this year, but then they started dicking around with Daniel Bryan and a lot of stuff just started turning to crap, so I changed my mind and decided to stay home.  Even when the possibility of a ticket came up, Batista vs. Orton plus the lack of Punk kept me from wanting to spend my money.

I want to look like an idiot for changing my mind and staying home, but WWE seems to be deadset on making me feel like a genius for saving all that money.
 
2014-02-22 06:55:15 PM  

ShiningWizard: Tenor Reaper: well it should be more entertaining than when the Rock did it

/Rock seems like a cool guy, but that was a painful WM to watch

My thoughts exactly. By far the worst Mania I have seen live. Maybe some of the older ones I have seen replays of could have been worse but having not seen the buildup or story lines leading up to them I can't really say.

Thankfully the Raw show the next night made up for a lot!


The Raw crowd the night after was the greatest crowd ever
 
2014-02-22 08:00:00 PM  
i176.photobucket.com
 
2014-02-22 08:08:54 PM  
Canadian Lurker:

Mmm... Wendi Richter.
 
2014-02-22 08:46:10 PM  
Could be worse - he could be in a match...
 
2014-02-22 09:58:14 PM  
It's the greatest night in the history of our sport!
 
2014-02-22 10:05:14 PM  

machoprogrammer: ShiningWizard: Tenor Reaper: well it should be more entertaining than when the Rock did it

/Rock seems like a cool guy, but that was a painful WM to watch

My thoughts exactly. By far the worst Mania I have seen live. Maybe some of the older ones I have seen replays of could have been worse but having not seen the buildup or story lines leading up to them I can't really say.

Thankfully the Raw show the next night made up for a lot!

The Raw crowd the night after was the greatest crowd ever


As only Jersey can provide XD
 
2014-02-22 11:51:00 PM  

IAmTheTagTeamChampions: Could be worse - he could be in a match...


b.vimeocdn.com
 
2014-02-23 08:43:19 AM  
WHATCHA GONNA WHEN THE POWER OF A 60 YEAR OLD CRIPPLE HOBBLES MILD ON YOU?!!!!!/sadly, this is the kind of train wreck that makes me want to watch again//issues, I has them
 
2014-02-23 09:41:56 AM  

pestluvr: WHATCHA GONNA WHEN THE POWER OF A 60 YEAR OLD CRIPPLE HOBBLES MILD ON YOU?!!!!!/sadly, this is the kind of train wreck that makes me want to watch again//issues, I has them


You just want to see Hulk come crashing down, and hurt inside.
 
2014-02-23 09:56:18 AM  
I have no issue with this. They're launching a Network, it's the 30th anniversary of Wrestlemania. It is Hulk Hogan in the WWE after all.

The only person I'm not big on returning is Batista. He pretty much did all he could do last time he was here, not sure where they're going with it.

Curious to see what happens to the Shield/Wyatt Family tonight. They have done a good job building this up.
 
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