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(BBC)   South Korea would like the world to know THAT IT IS DEVELOPING CYBER WEAPONS TO ATTACK THE NORTH, and why is everyone facepalming?   (bbc.co.uk) divider line 66
    More: Fail, South Korean, Stuxnet, isotope separation, University of Surrey, Iranian nuclear, computer security, Yonhap, North Koreans  
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5417 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Feb 2014 at 9:57 AM (25 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-02-21 09:23:46 AM
I hope their cyberweapons work on typewriters.
 
2014-02-21 09:31:24 AM
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-02-21 10:00:27 AM
I think we should handle NK with the most ridiculous Onionesque propaganda possible.
 
2014-02-21 10:01:18 AM
I stopped reading after the first line
 
2014-02-21 10:02:05 AM
It's not a blackout, it is the Glorious Leader's ingenious countermeasures to the puny cyberwarfare efforts of the running dogs in the south.
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2014-02-21 10:02:18 AM

naughtyrev: I hope their cyberweapons work on typewriters.


No doubt.  I think the most affective weapon against the north at this point would be create a trail of goldfish crackers through the DMZ.
 
2014-02-21 10:02:49 AM
2kcamilla.weebly.com
 
2014-02-21 10:06:09 AM
Why is this such a bad idea?  Just because NK isn't on the internet doesn't mean that a cyberweapon wouldn't work.  As I recall the US/Israel got Stuxnet on the Iranian centrifuge computers via a thumb drive someone carried in there.  There's no reason to think that SK couldn't bribe an NK nuclear scientist (and you could probably get one of them to turn traitor in exchange for a few square meals) to do something similar.

Besides, that idiotic homegrown OS the Norks use is probably at least 10 years out of date, security-wise.
 
2014-02-21 10:06:15 AM
Cyberweapons?

2.bp.blogspot.com
"EXCELLENT!"
 
2014-02-21 10:12:08 AM
dl.dropboxusercontent.com
 
2014-02-21 10:12:39 AM
Because it's just as smart to announce you're developing covert weapons against your enemy.
 
2014-02-21 10:13:20 AM
Where are they going to find that much Vespene gas, though?
 
2014-02-21 10:15:57 AM

DubtodaIll: Because it's just as smart to announce you're developing covert weapons against your enemy.


If your enemy is the embodiment of paranoia, it kind of is.  Now Kim Jong-Un will probably start getting suspicious about which one of his scientists is going to sneak the cyberweapon in.  Being who he is, Kim will thus have all of his nuclear scientists shot, setting the NK nuke program back decades.  And the best part is that SK didn't even create a cyber weapon---all they had to do was write a press release.
 
2014-02-21 10:16:39 AM
That should be about as effective as attempting to cripple Mississippi by taking away their toothbrushes and books.
 
2014-02-21 10:16:44 AM

doglover:


NK dildos?
 
2014-02-21 10:20:24 AM

HMS_Blinkin: DubtodaIll: Because it's just as smart to announce you're developing covert weapons against your enemy.

If your enemy is the embodiment of paranoia, it kind of is.  Now Kim Jong-Un will probably start getting suspicious about which one of his scientists is going to sneak the cyberweapon in.  Being who he is, Kim will thus have all of his nuclear scientists shot, setting the NK nuke program back decades.  And the best part is that SK didn't even create a cyber weapon---all they had to do was write a press release.


Way to let the cat out of the bag.
 
2014-02-21 10:22:26 AM

DubtodaIll: HMS_Blinkin: DubtodaIll: Because it's just as smart to announce you're developing covert weapons against your enemy.

If your enemy is the embodiment of paranoia, it kind of is.  Now Kim Jong-Un will probably start getting suspicious about which one of his scientists is going to sneak the cyberweapon in.  Being who he is, Kim will thus have all of his nuclear scientists shot, setting the NK nuke program back decades.  And the best part is that SK didn't even create a cyber weapon---all they had to do was write a press release.

Way to let the cat out of the bag.


Or is that what we WANT KIM JONG-UN TO THINK?????
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2014-02-21 10:23:58 AM

packman_jon: Cyberweapons?

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 640x480]
"EXCELLENT!"


That cyberman looks like he's  been calling for Mr. O'Rourke.  Has he been hanging out with Bender?
 
2014-02-21 10:27:38 AM

doglover: [upload.wikimedia.org image 850x413]


If they're going to be developing/creating some NOS EL34s, 12AX7s or 12AU7s I would not be mad.

/amp tubes
 
2014-02-21 10:28:13 AM
I'm glad to see someone finally discovered how to rootkit a turnip.
 
2014-02-21 10:31:13 AM

doglover: [upload.wikimedia.org image 850x413]


I....I know and have worked with at least 3 of those.

/the terrible memories.
 
2014-02-21 10:31:59 AM

HMS_Blinkin: DubtodaIll: HMS_Blinkin: DubtodaIll: Because it's just as smart to announce you're developing covert weapons against your enemy.

If your enemy is the embodiment of paranoia, it kind of is.  Now Kim Jong-Un will probably start getting suspicious about which one of his scientists is going to sneak the cyberweapon in.  Being who he is, Kim will thus have all of his nuclear scientists shot, setting the NK nuke program back decades.  And the best part is that SK didn't even create a cyber weapon---all they had to do was write a press release.

Way to let the cat out of the bag.

Or is that what we WANT KIM JONG-UN TO THINK?????


Double bluff.  It's an X-K-Red 27 technique.
 
2014-02-21 10:32:21 AM
Cyberwarfare and cyberterrorism are things charlatans wanting your money go on and on about. Meaningless buzzwords.
 
2014-02-21 10:37:43 AM

vpb: packman_jon: Cyberweapons?

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 640x480]
"EXCELLENT!"

That cyberman looks like he's  been calling for Mr. O'Rourke.  Has he been hanging out with Bender?


Ha!  FWIW the Cyberleader is saying "Destroy them!  Destroy them, AT. ONCE."

/yes I have had sex
 
2014-02-21 10:38:06 AM

What_do_you_want_now: doglover: [upload.wikimedia.org image 850x413]

I....I know and have worked with at least 3 of those.

/the terrible memories.


Don't knock tubes.  For certain applications, they are better than transistors.

Right now, I'm transmitting on 21.078 MHz using a 12BY7A driver tube to a pair of 6146B finals.

/Trying to get TI3VLM in Iceland on JT9 mode.
 
2014-02-21 10:38:59 AM

dittybopper: What_do_you_want_now: doglover: [upload.wikimedia.org image 850x413]

I....I know and have worked with at least 3 of those.

/the terrible memories.

Don't knock tubes.  For certain applications, they are better than transistors.

Right now, I'm transmitting on 21.078 MHz using a 12BY7A driver tube to a pair of 6146B finals.

/Trying to get TI3VLM in Iceland Costa Rica on JT9 mode.


And he answered my first call.
 
2014-02-21 10:42:18 AM

dittybopper: dittybopper: What_do_you_want_now: doglover: [upload.wikimedia.org image 850x413]

I....I know and have worked with at least 3 of those.

/the terrible memories.

Don't knock tubes.  For certain applications, they are better than transistors.

Right now, I'm transmitting on 21.078 MHz using a 12BY7A driver tube to a pair of 6146B finals.

/Trying to get TI3VLM in Iceland Costa Rica on JT9 mode.

And he answered my first call.


Except that it was HA8ZI in Hungary.
 
2014-02-21 10:42:25 AM

HMS_Blinkin: Why is this such a bad idea?  Just because NK isn't on the internet doesn't mean that a cyberweapon wouldn't work.  As I recall the US/Israel got Stuxnet on the Iranian centrifuge computers via a thumb drive someone carried in there.  There's no reason to think that SK couldn't bribe an NK nuclear scientist (and you could probably get one of them to turn traitor in exchange for a few square meals) to do something similar.

Besides, that idiotic homegrown OS the Norks use is probably at least 10 years out of date, security-wise.



There's questionable wisdom in announcing a plan to attack someone when they're pointing enough artillery at you to level the city around you before you can reach your limo and leave for your winter home.
 
2014-02-21 10:47:02 AM
They finally deploying the michalangelo virus?
 
2014-02-21 10:51:24 AM
But first they must construct additional pylons.
 
2014-02-21 10:52:16 AM

Molavian: Where are they going to find that much Vespene gas, though?


*shakes tiny fist*
 
2014-02-21 10:55:26 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-21 11:00:16 AM

HMS_Blinkin: DubtodaIll: Because it's just as smart to announce you're developing covert weapons against your enemy.

If your enemy is the embodiment of paranoia, it kind of is.  Now Kim Jong-Un will probably start getting suspicious about which one of his scientists is going to sneak the cyberweapon in.  Being who he is, Kim will thus have all of his nuclear scientists shot, setting the NK nuke program back decades.  And the best part is that SK didn't even create a cyber weapon---all they had to do was write a press release.


Even better, is that it will make the DPRK extremely wary of using computers for any kind of national emergency.

That will make them much slower to react to ROK/US moves, and less able to quickly digest and process intelligence information.
 
d23 [TotalFark]
2014-02-21 11:03:10 AM
really.. the worst thing could happen here is that Kim Jong-un will be unable to get pron for a couple of days.  That might cause a national emergency, though...
 
2014-02-21 11:05:24 AM

HMS_Blinkin: DubtodaIll: Because it's just as smart to announce you're developing covert weapons against your enemy.

If your enemy is the embodiment of paranoia, it kind of is.  Now Kim Jong-Un will probably start getting suspicious about which one of his scientists is going to sneak the cyberweapon in.  Being who he is, Kim will thus have all of his nuclear scientists shot, setting the NK nuke program back decades.  And the best part is that SK didn't even create a cyber weapon---all they had to do was write a press release.


Nah. He'll just update he version of Norton antivirus on their Windows 95 computers.
 
2014-02-21 11:09:22 AM

HMS_Blinkin: DubtodaIll: Because it's just as smart to announce you're developing covert weapons against your enemy.

If your enemy is the embodiment of paranoia, it kind of is.  Now Kim Jong-Un will probably start getting suspicious about which one of his scientists is going to sneak the cyberweapon in.  Being who he is, Kim will thus have all of his nuclear scientists shot, setting the NK nuke program back decades.  And the best part is that SK didn't even create a cyber weapon---all they had to do was write a press release.


As if the imperial dogs could somehow crack glorious Red Star OS, which incidentally is now ripping off OS X:
www.technobuffalo.com
 
2014-02-21 11:18:49 AM

IndyMBA: doglover: [upload.wikimedia.org image 850x413]

If they're going to be developing/creating some NOS EL34s, 12AX7s or 12AU7s I would not be mad.

/amp tubes


What? No 6L6's or 6V6's?  Not to mention maybe a 5U4 rectifier for some sweet sag...
 
2014-02-21 11:20:08 AM
i61.tinypic.com
 
2014-02-21 11:35:12 AM

packman_jon: vpb: packman_jon: Cyberweapons?

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 640x480]
"EXCELLENT!"

That cyberman looks like he's  been calling for Mr. O'Rourke.  Has he been hanging out with Bender?

Ha!  FWIW the Cyberleader is saying "Destroy them!  Destroy them, AT. ONCE."

/yes I have had sex


If one Korea wins are they  declared Cyber king?
content.boomerangbooks.com.au
 
2014-02-21 11:38:50 AM
Step 1) Create anti-NK rootworms.
Step 2) Covertly build millions of power plants in NK .
Step 3) Special forces infiltrate the country with 500, 000 stealth phone poles and high tension power pylons and install them at night.
Step 4) Strategic airlift missions drop thousands of transformer substations at key points.
...and so forth, all the way up to step 5857, in which NK has electricity and is ready to be infiltrated by fiberoptic raiders.....
 
2014-02-21 11:47:49 AM

naughtyrev: I hope their cyberweapons work on typewriters.


North Korea has universities teaching computer science, a thriving programming outsourcing sector and its own Linux distribution. They have built a working nuclear bomb and placed a satellite in orbit, neither of which is easily done using typewriters alone.

That doesn't make the rulers there nice people, but it does make attempts to portray the whole country as a bunch of unsophisticated peasants look a bit silly.
 
2014-02-21 12:23:50 PM
ts1.mm.bing.net
 
2014-02-21 12:35:09 PM
Supposedly when an IAEA team was allowed to visit a NK uranium enrichment facility, they were surprised to find brand new, state-of-the-art control room, most likely delivered by our BFF China. That NK couldn't build a pocket calculator by themselves doesn't mean they don't own any military high tech.
 
2014-02-21 12:38:40 PM

naughtyrev: I hope their cyberweapons work on typewriters.


Why?
 
2014-02-21 12:45:14 PM

HMS_Blinkin: Why is this such a bad idea?  Just because NK isn't on the internet doesn't mean that a cyberweapon wouldn't work.  As I recall the US/Israel got Stuxnet on the Iranian centrifuge computers via a thumb drive someone carried in there.  There's no reason to think that SK couldn't bribe an NK nuclear scientist (and you could probably get one of them to turn traitor in exchange for a few square meals) to do something similar.

Besides, that idiotic homegrown OS the Norks use is probably at least 10 years out of date, security-wise.


I don't think Linux is idiotic, especially not for a country like North Korea.

And it's obviously completely up to date, as they're actively reskinning it (besides them just needing use to the same updates that everyone else who uses Linux has access too).

---

Everyone in the middle class and up does have thumbdrives, there's a huge piracy thing with swapping movies going on there. So that's a nice attack vector.

Telling the Norks that you are actually going to attack them, and the targets will be sounds stupid though.
 
2014-02-21 12:47:08 PM

generallyso: HMS_Blinkin: Why is this such a bad idea?  Just because NK isn't on the internet doesn't mean that a cyberweapon wouldn't work.  As I recall the US/Israel got Stuxnet on the Iranian centrifuge computers via a thumb drive someone carried in there.  There's no reason to think that SK couldn't bribe an NK nuclear scientist (and you could probably get one of them to turn traitor in exchange for a few square meals) to do something similar.

Besides, that idiotic homegrown OS the Norks use is probably at least 10 years out of date, security-wise.


There's questionable wisdom in announcing a plan to attack someone when they're pointing enough artillery at you to level the city around you before you can reach your limo and leave for your winter home.


I think OP was going for something like they don't have computers or something, which is so stupid it's not even funny in a sarcastic way.
 
2014-02-21 12:50:42 PM
In America , its called a wire cutter!
 
2014-02-21 01:07:17 PM

packman_jon: Cyberweapons?

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 640x480]
"EXCELLENT!"


Little do they know that North Korea has been stockpiling gold for decades now, just for this contingency.
 
2014-02-21 01:08:08 PM

packman_jon: vpb: packman_jon: Cyberweapons?

[2.bp.blogspot.com image 640x480]
"EXCELLENT!"

That cyberman looks like he's  been calling for Mr. O'Rourke.  Has he been hanging out with Bender?

Ha!  FWIW the Cyberleader is saying "Destroy them!  Destroy them, AT. ONCE."

/yes I have had sex


With a real person?
 
2014-02-21 01:08:33 PM
v4s.yimg.com

s2.yimg.com

I have been in computer labs in Chongjin, Pyongyang and a few other cities. Not as funny as you think.
 
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