Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Mother Nature Network)   It's a question somebody should ask: "Does an octopus make a good pet?   (mnn.com) divider line 99
    More: Strange, octopus  
•       •       •

5027 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Feb 2014 at 1:47 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



99 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-02-20 12:15:04 PM  
No. They don't live very long. And they really know how to escape from tanks.
 
2014-02-20 12:35:27 PM  
I hear they can get attached to you.
 
2014-02-20 12:38:34 PM  
No, but it makes a great petter.
 
2014-02-20 01:48:19 PM  
Makes a great hat, though.
 
2014-02-20 01:49:04 PM  
No.  A meal?  Yes.
 
2014-02-20 01:50:45 PM  
Cuttlefish are more cuddly.
 
2014-02-20 01:51:38 PM  
oooooh... That's it! Stroke my hectocotylus, baby!
 
2014-02-20 01:53:06 PM  
your pet store does carry octopus food. it's called other fish
 
2014-02-20 01:53:49 PM  
Probably not. They'd make cool pets; but, you'd need to put bricks on the tank lid.
 
2014-02-20 01:53:52 PM  
You might think so, but they're smart and they have eight whirling legs sharp beaks.  One minute you're taking a pleasant stroll through the park.  The next, you're flat on your butt with two black eyes, a face full of ink and frayed leash in your hand, wondering why you got out of bed that morning.
 
2014-02-20 01:53:54 PM  
They make for a middling episode of Kenny vs Spenny.
 
2014-02-20 01:54:09 PM  
I had one years ago. Lots of extra work. Especially designing the tank to avoid escapes.

The supplier I used (this was in the 80's) once showed me an amazing video. He was losing fish. They were just disappearing. A camera he set up showed an octopus leaving a huge tank he was in, plopping to the floor, getting into another tank and having his "dinner", then going back to his origional tank. Just amazing.
 
2014-02-20 01:54:41 PM  

Lando Lincoln: No. They don't live very long. And they really know how to escape from tanks.


I talked to an aquarium keeper who said their octopus would climb out of his tank at night and eat his neighbors.

They solved it by putting Astroturf around his tank. Apparently they hate Astroturf.
 
2014-02-20 01:55:23 PM  
They make pretty good dads.

/not obscure
 
2014-02-20 01:55:34 PM  

Kanemano: your pet store does carry octopus food. it's called other fish


No wonder so much of Fark can't get laid.  The octopi are eating all the other fish in the sea
 
2014-02-20 01:55:37 PM  
Who's that man with the three piece suit?
Makin' a doll with a log and fruit
Who's that man with the eight strong legs?
Tried to make me breakfast but he broke my eggs
 
2014-02-20 01:58:54 PM  
No,

They don't.

Best case under perfect conditions, they only live 2 years.
 
2014-02-20 01:59:04 PM  
The fisherman's wife most certainly approves.
 
2014-02-20 02:00:29 PM  

dryknife: Cuttlefish are more cuddly.


I want some. They're like little Lovecraftian puppies.
 
2014-02-20 02:00:40 PM  
Depends if you're into that sort of thing and by that I mean tentacle porn.
 
2014-02-20 02:02:09 PM  
Nope, but they do make good calamari! I know people would have a problem with eating their pets after they die, but come on, this is the 21st century, folks!
 
2014-02-20 02:02:22 PM  
I have one I use to refill my fountain pen.

Neither of us likes the process.
 
2014-02-20 02:02:55 PM  
Octopodes.

Or if you like, octopuses
 
2014-02-20 02:03:06 PM  
Meanwhile, in Japan....
 
2014-02-20 02:03:13 PM  

kidsizedcoffin: Who's that man with the three piece suit?
Makin' a doll with a log and fruit
Who's that man with the eight strong legs?
Tried to make me breakfast but he broke my eggs


Great, now I'm singing it.
 
2014-02-20 02:04:41 PM  

AFJuvat1: No,

They don't.

Best case under perfect conditions, they only live 2 years.


That's why, even though I dive all the time and have the opportunity, I would never take one home as a pet.  I just grab a rock and club 'em to death right there in the ocean.  The funny part is when you get in a real solid whack right on top of the head, they're legs shoot straight out in all eight directions and they make a loud "DING!" sound just like one of those hammer swinging games at the carnival.
 
2014-02-20 02:05:40 PM  
Can I bring it on a plane as an assistance octopus?
 
2014-02-20 02:07:16 PM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-02-20 02:09:45 PM  
The Giant Pacific variety will douse you with water if it takes a dislike to you, and they've been known to single out particular individuals for this treatment.  Or maybe it's just octopus humor.  My guess is you're not thinking of one of those for pet material though--they're pretty hefty.
 
2014-02-20 02:11:14 PM  
'Pandora' - the large female octopus @ the Nat'l Zoo just died at age 5:
http://www.upi.com/blog/2014/02/13/National-Zoos-longest-living-giant - octopus-dies/4701392318183/
 
2014-02-20 02:14:09 PM  
Does an octopus make a good pet?

img.pandawhale.com
 
2014-02-20 02:14:41 PM  
It really is a shame how short their lives are, given how intelligent they are. They don't ship well either. I've heard survival rates of around one in twenty using the same method that most tropical fish are shipped. One of my local shops had blue ring octopus in once. About the size of a thumb, supposed to be poisonous (venomous?) enough to kill a person with one bite.
 
2014-02-20 02:14:51 PM  
Bela thought so.
media.screened.com
/much to his regret
 
2014-02-20 02:14:56 PM  
Fark, you disappoint me.  Now, I gotta go fetch the NOPE, NOPE, NOPE gif.
 
2014-02-20 02:15:38 PM  
I'm coming to the conclusion I need to stop eating them - they're so damn smart, it's almost  like eating a sentient being.....
 
2014-02-20 02:15:43 PM  
Despite being called an octopus on a couple first dates I really have no clue on this subject.
 
2014-02-20 02:16:30 PM  
Ian Flemming says "no".
 
2014-02-20 02:16:39 PM  

BetterMetalSnake: I have one I use to refill my fountain pen.

Neither of us likes the process.


I had an inkling that it would be onerous...

/seriously, thanks for the luls - I actually lol'd so now you've joined my fav list :)
 
2014-02-20 02:19:19 PM  

Louisiana_Sitar_Club: You might think so, but they're smart and they have eight whirling legs sharp beaks.  One minute you're taking a pleasant stroll through the park.  The next, you're flat on your butt with two black eyes, a face full of ink and frayed leash in your hand, wondering why you got out of bed that morning.


YOU

You need to come here and explain to the person in the office next to me why I laughed so hard I almost choked.
 
2014-02-20 02:20:15 PM  
Ghastly is distraught.
 
2014-02-20 02:22:25 PM  
Sure, until they learn to hack the electronic lock on their aquarium, steal your car keys and wallet and go on a beer run.
 
2014-02-20 02:27:32 PM  
According to some anime, they make good lovers.
 
2014-02-20 02:30:26 PM  
This reminds me of a news report given by the crack Eyewitness News team of Channel 10 WCAU Philadelphia one extremely slow news day.  The station was the lowest rated of the local broadcast stations and the reporting team had been the subject of a number of turnovers in personnel.  The news anchor this night was a pompous clown generally regarded as the dullest blade in the cutlery drawer.  He had turned over to a field reporter who was doing a remote report from the Camden Aquarium and the final shot had the reporter framed by an aquarium tank.  As he was wrapping up his report an octopus moves up to the aquarium glass as if it thought it could capture the reporter with one extremely long tentacles.  The reporter turned the broadcast back to the anchor, who turned to the weather girl sitting next to him and said: "Wow, did you see the size of that octopus's testicles?  They were huge."
 
2014-02-20 02:31:22 PM  
First thing I thought of:

1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-02-20 02:33:19 PM  
I'm going to go with no. They're extremely high maintenance and probably smarter than the person that bought them.
 
2014-02-20 02:33:59 PM  
ecx.images-amazon.com
 
2014-02-20 02:35:01 PM  
 
2014-02-20 02:36:33 PM  

BetterMetalSnake: I have one I use to refill my fountain pen.

Neither of us likes the process.


Nice.
 
2014-02-20 02:36:40 PM  
marinebio.org

Great pets. And they love to cuddle with you. That burning sensation spreading through your body? That's love.
 
2014-02-20 02:37:44 PM  
Lio says yes!

static.tvtropes.org
 
2014-02-20 02:38:00 PM  

miniflea: It really is a shame how short their lives are, given how intelligent they are. They don't ship well either. I've heard survival rates of around one in twenty using the same method that most tropical fish are shipped. One of my local shops had blue ring octopus in once. About the size of a thumb, supposed to be poisonous (venomous?) enough to kill a person with one bite.


Blue Ring Octopus  - just a little poisonous.
 
2014-02-20 02:39:23 PM  
 
2014-02-20 02:39:53 PM  

Dazrin: BetterMetalSnake: I have one I use to refill my fountain pen.

Neither of us likes the process.

Nice.


I also got a nice chuckle.
 
2014-02-20 02:41:15 PM  

Literally Addicted: miniflea: It really is a shame how short their lives are, given how intelligent they are. They don't ship well either. I've heard survival rates of around one in twenty using the same method that most tropical fish are shipped. One of my local shops had blue ring octopus in once. About the size of a thumb, supposed to be poisonous (venomous?) enough to kill a person with one bite.

Blue Ring Octopus  - just a little poisonous.


# 2 on my list of top 1,000 reasons to stay the fark out of the ocean.
 
2014-02-20 02:41:49 PM  
Last night PBS taught me that honey badgers are also not ideal pets, despite that they're cute.

rzss.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-02-20 02:42:53 PM  

Literally Addicted: miniflea: It really is a shame how short their lives are, given how intelligent they are. They don't ship well either. I've heard survival rates of around one in twenty using the same method that most tropical fish are shipped. One of my local shops had blue ring octopus in once. About the size of a thumb, supposed to be poisonous (venomous?) enough to kill a person with one bite.

Blue Ring Octopus  - just a little poisonous.


All Octopuses are a little bit poisonous. Blue-ringed octopuses are REALLY farkin poisonous.
 
2014-02-20 02:43:29 PM  

Ivo Shandor: dryknife: Cuttlefish are more cuddly.

I want some. They're like little Lovecraftian puppies.


I dunno. That uh...lady in Dagon was pretty hot. For a while anyway.
 
2014-02-20 02:45:08 PM  
4.bp.blogspot.com

I'd pet that octopus...

She was based on Lyndall Jarvis

lightingale.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-02-20 02:50:23 PM  
Do you have under a year to live? Then, sure.
 
2014-02-20 02:52:52 PM  

Gandalf_is_dead: Literally Addicted: miniflea: It really is a shame how short their lives are, given how intelligent they are. They don't ship well either. I've heard survival rates of around one in twenty using the same method that most tropical fish are shipped. One of my local shops had blue ring octopus in once. About the size of a thumb, supposed to be poisonous (venomous?) enough to kill a person with one bite.

Blue Ring Octopus  - just a little poisonous.

All Octopuses are a little bit poisonous. Blue-ringed octopuses are REALLY farkin poisonous.


Not only that, they are also venomous.
 
2014-02-20 02:54:48 PM  
Back in college, I had a buddy with a pet octopus in a tank in his room. Many was the night that a few of us would spark up the bong, get higher than Jesus and watch the "Brian's Octopus Kills Goldfish" show, usually with some trippy music going. Good times...

And yep, sure enough, it climbed out of its tank one day and died on the floor.  Show's over, folks.
 
2014-02-20 02:55:11 PM  
The cephalopod menace has gained access to the home of influential people.

"Iä! Iä! Cthulhu Fhtagn!"
 
2014-02-20 02:55:38 PM  

Valiente: Do you have under a year to live? Then, sure.


So I guess they'd make good pets for people that get bored quickly.
 
2014-02-20 03:00:12 PM  
I always kinda liked the Roger Dean - Gentle Giant one, despite the weird painted-over hidden images and the fact that it's actually an octopus/cuttlefish chimera.
4.bp.blogspot.com

But a pet?

Don't play with your food.

distilleryimage0.s3.amazonaws.com
 
2014-02-20 03:12:34 PM  

kidsizedcoffin: Who's that man with the three piece suit?
Makin' a doll with a log and fruit
Who's that man with the eight strong legs?
Tried to make me breakfast but he broke my eggs


Such a good game. Humming the song now. Thanks, Obama!

No really thanks.
 
2014-02-20 03:17:05 PM  
Suckers!
 
2014-02-20 03:17:12 PM  

cgraves67: According to some anime, they make good lovers.


So says the fisherman's wife.
 
2014-02-20 03:18:24 PM  

cwheelie: I'm coming to the conclusion I need to stop eating them - they're so damn smart, it's almost  like eating a sentient being.....


I stopped eating them years ago. A guy I worked with had several marine tanks set up in his office,
and at night, before I left, I would sit and stare at his octopus for an hour or so. If he was on the glass, he'd change texture and color to match my hand when I brought it near.

And that was when I stopped eating tako. Not nearly delicious enough to justify it.

Chickens on the other hand - I don't care if they can play chess I'm still eating the farkers.


TEAM MAMMAL!
 
2014-02-20 03:21:48 PM  

ristst: Despite being called an octopus on a couple first dates I really have no clue on this subject.

Prey4reign: [...] The reporter turned the broadcast back to the anchor, who turned to the weather girl sitting next to him and said: "Wow, did you see the size of that octopus's testicles?  They were huge."

i0.wp.com

 
2014-02-20 03:24:07 PM  

cherryl taggart: Fark, you disappoint me.  Now, I gotta go fetch the NOPE, NOPE, NOPE gif.


odorunara.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-02-20 03:31:02 PM  

MBooda: Don't play with your food.
[distilleryimage0.s3.amazonaws.com image 306x306]


A Fark oldie.  Also here.
 
2014-02-20 03:31:07 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-02-20 03:40:33 PM  

yequalsy:


That squid looks like the creature from The Oscar J Noodleman Television Network
 
2014-02-20 03:41:57 PM  

Literally Addicted: miniflea: It really is a shame how short their lives are, given how intelligent they are. They don't ship well either. I've heard survival rates of around one in twenty using the same method that most tropical fish are shipped. One of my local shops had blue ring octopus in once. About the size of a thumb, supposed to be poisonous (venomous?) enough to kill a person with one bite.

Blue Ring Octopus  - just a little poisonous.


Are they sold as pets?  The one I saw didn't have a price tag and I didn't ask the owner about it.  Wish I had.
 
2014-02-20 03:47:42 PM  
One of my buddies got into salt water for a while...he bought an octopus to put into one of the tanks.  It was so exciting to get it to the tank to release it!  And then to never see it again.

The guy the at the store was telling us that it used to get out and into the adjacent tanks to eat the fish.  Then it would go back to its tank and act all innocent.
 
2014-02-20 03:49:43 PM  

kling_klang_bed: Nope, but they do make good calamari! I know people would have a problem with eating their pets after they die, but come on, this is the 21st century, folks!



That's exactly why I keep chickens...they make great beef wellington

/You probably don't get it, but that's ok
 
2014-02-20 03:49:44 PM  
i think they're cool as shiat, but probably not a great pet. Leave it to the giant aquariums. They're (mostly) professionals.
 
2014-02-20 04:15:53 PM  
I don't feel too bad about eating them. They'd devour me in a heartbeat if they could.
 
2014-02-20 04:18:52 PM  
Pet...? No.

Lover...?

fc09.deviantart.net

Oh YES.
 
2014-02-20 04:26:07 PM  
Come on boy - shake..
Other paw
Other paw
Other paw
Other paw
Other paw
Other paw
Other paw
Good Boy!
 
2014-02-20 04:37:39 PM  

Lando Lincoln: I don't feel too bad about eating them. They'd devour me in a heartbeat if they could.


Exactly.  Turnabout is fair play with salt and a hot griddle
 
2014-02-20 04:44:09 PM  
CSB:  (I've told it here before, but it's funny enough to go for it again.)

I used to deliver tropical fish to pet stores.  There was this guy down in Maryland, with a rather sizable salt water section in his shop.  He was telling me one day that some of his most expensive fish are being stolen, and it's really pissing him off.  So, he sets up some video survelience to catch the bastard that is doing it.

The next week while I'm down there, he tells me what he found out.

"You see that octopus right there?  It's him!"
The octopus would sneak out of his tank in the middle of the night, catch whatever fish he could (no matter how expensive), eat it, and go back to his tank before opening.

Seriously...  I don't think there is any doubt that they are surpisingly intelligent animals.
 
2014-02-20 04:46:03 PM  

TheYeti: One of my buddies got into salt water for a while...he bought an octopus to put into one of the tanks.  It was so exciting to get it to the tank to release it!  And then to never see it again.

The guy the at the store was telling us that it used to get out and into the adjacent tanks to eat the fish.  Then it would go back to its tank and act all innocent.


OMG.  I feel like I just told that story.  I wonder if it's the same guy.  Was this about 20 years ago, near Crofton Maryland?
 
2014-02-20 04:48:50 PM  
durbnpoisn:

Seriously...  I don't think there is any doubt that they are surpisingly intelligent animals.

But they're lousy public speakers.

dummr.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-02-20 05:11:49 PM  

MBooda: Don't play with your food.


Anyone else needing bunk time after seeing that chick get face humped by the octo?
 
2014-02-20 05:18:52 PM  
 
2014-02-20 06:25:11 PM  

MythDragon: MBooda: Don't play with your food.

Anyone else needing bunk time after seeing that chick get face humped by the octo?


I take it you jerked off to Alien, right?
 
2014-02-20 06:25:12 PM  

cwheelie: I'm coming to the conclusion I need to stop eating them - they're so damn smart, it's almost  like eating a sentient being.....


They are considered pretty smart for a shellfish. But they aren't nearly as intelligent as the mammals most of us eat on a regular basis. I'd put them somewhere in the same class as a squirrel.
 
2014-02-20 06:38:03 PM  

Magnanimous_J: cwheelie: I'm coming to the conclusion I need to stop eating them - they're so damn smart, it's almost  like eating a sentient being.....

They are considered pretty smart for a shellfish. But they aren't nearly as intelligent as the mammals most of us eat on a regular basis. I'd put them somewhere in the same class as a squirrel.


I dunno.  I never heard of a squirrel solving puzzles or using tools.  On the other hand, the best response to the cephalopod menace is sushi and calamari.
 
2014-02-20 07:02:03 PM  

FarkinHostile: MythDragon: MBooda: Don't play with your food.

Anyone else needing bunk time after seeing that chick get face humped by the octo?

I take it you jerked off to Alien, right?


Absolutely not.

/no comment on hentai tentacle porn
 
2014-02-20 07:34:25 PM  
I've had a dream for several years now to one day obtain a pet California spotted octopus. I'm going to name him Edmund Fitzgerald. It's going to be completely awesome. I'll teach him tricks.
 
2014-02-20 07:38:35 PM  

MBooda: I always kinda liked the Roger Dean - Gentle Giant one, despite the weird painted-over hidden images and the fact that it's actually an octopus/cuttlefish chimera.


But a pet?

Don't play with your food.


You worry me, d00d.
 
2014-02-20 08:16:57 PM  

jayfurr: MBooda: I always kinda liked the Roger Dean - Gentle Giant one, despite the weird painted-over hidden images and the fact that it's actually an octopus/cuttlefish chimera.


But a pet?

Don't play with your food.

You worry me, d00d.


Heh, you know me better than that, Jay.

/how's Knoxville?
 
2014-02-20 09:40:00 PM  

Magnanimous_J: cwheelie: I'm coming to the conclusion I need to stop eating them - they're so damn smart, it's almost  like eating a sentient being.....

They are considered pretty smart for a shellfish. But they aren't nearly as intelligent as the mammals most of us eat on a regular basis. I'd put them somewhere in the same class as a squirrel.


Octopuses have the intellect of a small child.  Much smarter than a squirrel.
 
2014-02-20 09:56:59 PM  

MBooda: jayfurr: MBooda: I always kinda liked the Roger Dean - Gentle Giant one, despite the weird painted-over hidden images and the fact that it's actually an octopus/cuttlefish chimera.


But a pet?

Don't play with your food.

You worry me, d00d.

Heh, you know me better than that, Jay.

/how's Knoxville?


PARTY ALL THE TIME
 
2014-02-20 10:22:57 PM  
Pet?

Nope.

1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-02-21 01:37:24 AM  
I kept one in a tank when I was stationed in Jeddah. Every night he would head off looking for the sea and we would find him in the sink, on the floor, in the toilet etc. We put him back in the sea after a week.
 
2014-02-21 06:45:21 AM  

crumblecat: I kept one in a tank when I was stationed in Jeddah. Every night he would head off looking for the sea and we would find him in the sink, on the floor, in the toilet etc.


Holy Christ, I hope you didn't find him there the hard way.
 
2014-02-22 12:12:43 AM  
img.fark.net
 
Displayed 99 of 99 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report