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(Daily Mail)   Warning: a nudist cruise may attract dangerous, violent perverts   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 70
    More: Obvious, Americans, Holland America, old charges, Vagina Monologues  
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10559 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Feb 2014 at 6:22 PM (43 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



70 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-02-19 05:00:29 PM  
Argh, we're flying the skull and crossboners.

Swab me poop deck.

Didn't read the article as it would probably depress me but wanted to let loose with random buttpiracy.
 
2014-02-19 05:05:36 PM  
I have never been on a cruise and have no particular desire to go on one. However, having seen many pictures of people who do go on cruises, I can say with almost 100 percent certainty that if I *were* to ever go on a cruise, it would not be a nudist cruise.
 
2014-02-19 05:12:23 PM  

Pocket Ninja: I have never been on a cruise and have no particular desire to go on one.


What put you off? The constant explosive human feces or the nightmare marriage of rape and death?
 
2014-02-19 05:17:44 PM  

sigdiamond2000: The constant explosive human feces or the nightmare marriage of rape and death?


The idea of being stuck on a freakin' boat for days at a time, surrounded by thousands of other people. The feces, rape, and death are simply additional nuances.
 
2014-02-19 05:48:18 PM  
His victim fought back, biting him, striking at his exposed genitals and using a corkscrew to try to stab him

Alabama Whitman approves.

Wait, the staff are all nude, too? How do you identify them, then?
 
2014-02-19 06:02:05 PM  
Creepy Cruise Commercial Theme Song Idea

Ooo-ee, ooo-ee baby
Ooo-ee, ooo-ee baby
Ooo-ee, ooo-ee baby

Be our guest you've got everything to lose
Won't you let us forcefully take you on a Semen Cruise.
 
2014-02-19 07:02:20 PM  
Types of Cruisers:

1) Newlywed
2) Nearly dead
3) Overfed

/only cruise ship joke I know
 
2014-02-19 07:03:28 PM  
 
2014-02-19 07:04:24 PM  
He raped her because he called him a son of a biatch?
I would hate to see what he would do after spending a weekend in New York.
 
2014-02-19 07:10:58 PM  

CipollinaFan: He raped her because he called him a son of a biatch?
I would hate to see what he would do after spending a weekend in New York.

 
2014-02-19 07:11:04 PM  

Pocket Ninja: sigdiamond2000: The constant explosive human feces or the nightmare marriage of rape and death?

The idea of being stuck on a freakin' boat for days at a time, surrounded by thousands of other people. The feces, rape, and death are simply additional nuances.


Cruises can be a useful and fun way to sample a geographic area. Instead of spending all your vacation time on one Caribbean island, you can visit half - a- dozen in the same time without having to unpack. The trick is to find ways to make a short day in each port meaningful and not allow yourself to be insulated in a prepackaged tourist bubble. Another benefit is you do all the traveling at night: each morning you wake up in a different port.

As with any travel, what you get out of a cruise depends on what you bring to it
 
2014-02-19 07:12:02 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-19 07:12:50 PM  

Pocket Ninja: sigdiamond2000: The constant explosive human feces or the nightmare marriage of rape and death?

The idea of being stuck on a freakin' boat for days at a time, surrounded by thousands of other people. The feces, rape, and death are simply additional nuances.


i wish to god i could be as eloquent as you. fark you.
 
2014-02-19 07:13:11 PM  
A rippin and a tearing.
viaurlnewsnetwork.com
A rippin and a tearing.
 
2014-02-19 07:15:12 PM  
i.imgur.com
I think women and seamen don't mix.
 
2014-02-19 07:16:46 PM  
media.animevice.com
 
2014-02-19 07:21:34 PM  

Pocket Ninja: I have never been on a cruise and have no particular desire to go on one. However, having seen many pictures of people who do go on cruises, I can say with almost 100 percent certainty that if I *were* to ever go on a cruise, it would not be a nudist cruise.


I'll defer to a professional photographer like Stealth Hippo for this
 
2014-02-19 07:22:08 PM  
I've been on two cruises (Alaskan and Bahamas)...thoughts:

- Cruise itself is boring as hell...there's only so much relaxing reading a book you can do until you're over it
- Excursions are great...except when you have to go outside of one block of tourist stuff in anything Caribbean.
- As a fatty...cruises are the best place I can go to feel thin. I'm a big boy but damn

And the bottom two make me never want to do a nudist cruise
- Way too many people in too small a space
- Cruise ships are floating petrie dishes...I got really sick (flu-like symptoms) on the Alaskan cruise and my friend got a really bad stomach bug on the Bahama one.  Just imagine if everyone's putting their naked arse on everything you're touching/sitting on
 
2014-02-19 07:23:12 PM  

sigdiamond2000: Pocket Ninja: I have never been on a cruise and have no particular desire to go on one.

What put you off? The constant explosive human feces or the nightmare marriage of rape and death?


Oh no, those are the plusses. It's the shuffleboard I can't stand.
 
2014-02-19 07:25:18 PM  
DetrimentalScience:

img.fark.net

pitchfork-cdn.s3.amazonaws.com

Is that a nice thing to do?  No, that's not a nice thing to do.  They work so hard too.
 
2014-02-19 07:30:52 PM  
Rum, sodomy and the lash?
 
2014-02-19 07:34:44 PM  

trappedspirit: Rum, sodomy and the lash?


yes, please.
 
2014-02-19 07:37:02 PM  
As far as the actual "insult" that started this whole mess, maybe she wasn't actually calling the steward a son of a biatch, but was just uttering an epithet.  Saying, : 'Wait a minute, son of a b****'."  could also be just another way of saying, "I'm not ready for you to be here."  I recommend that all future nude cruisers say instead, "wait a minute, oh fark!"  That can't be inferred as a direct insult, like the other phrase.

/I'm trying to be helpful
 
2014-02-19 07:37:27 PM  
I haven't known many nudists, but from those I do know, I suggest that going on a nudist cruise with intent to ogle will probably leave you disappointed if not horrified.
 
2014-02-19 07:37:37 PM  
Even bigger warning: a nudist cruise may attract nudists. Who will be nude!
 
2014-02-19 07:38:12 PM  

brap: Argh, we're flying the skull and crossboners.

Swab me poop deck.

Didn't read the article as it would probably depress me but wanted to let loose with random buttpiracy.


YAAAAAARRRRR!

Buccaneers In search of booty....
 
gja [TotalFark]
2014-02-19 07:38:13 PM  

K3rmy: Time for The Sailor Song!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qlti8Q-gU-Q


O....M....F.....G
How I  just laughed. It's a maritime themed rip-off of Barbie Girl.
 
2014-02-19 07:43:29 PM  

James10952001: I haven't known many nudists, but from those I do know, I suggest that going on a nudist cruise with intent to ogle will probably leave you disappointed if not horrified.


Nudists are a lot like lesbians; the reality is far different than the fantasy. Mostly a great disappointment.
 
2014-02-19 07:47:49 PM  
What an idiot.

He should do what others do - wait till night time, approach her from behind as she stares into the moonlit horizon, and tip her overboard.
It's that easy.
 
2014-02-19 07:51:49 PM  
I could never be a nudist.  No pockets for my keys, wallet, smokes, and lighter.
 
2014-02-19 07:51:50 PM  
Nude people on a ship manned by Muslim Indonesians: what could go wrong?


/On the open water, no one can claim legal jurisdiction for you
 
2014-02-19 07:55:45 PM  

ShivaHVishnu: As far as the actual "insult" that started this whole mess, maybe she wasn't actually calling the steward a son of a biatch, but was just uttering an epithet.


I thought the same thing. She was rude, sure, but I bet she wasn't expecting him to take the insult as a personal affront to his family. He's clearly a nut job but I wonder if he'll eventually realize how normal and non-derogatory her comment was within her own culture.
 
2014-02-19 07:57:47 PM  
www.politicalgraphics.org
Discuss.
 
2014-02-19 07:58:48 PM  

Rapmaster2000: I could never be a nudist.  No pockets for my keys, wallet, smokes, and lighter.


You have no imagination.
 
2014-02-19 07:58:51 PM  

BolshyGreatYarblocks: Nude people on a ship manned by Muslim Indonesians: what could go wrong?


THIS.

I'll stick to normal nudist resorts on land, manned by other harmless hippie nudists who get it.
 
2014-02-19 08:02:03 PM  

Pocket Ninja: I have never been on a cruise and have no particular desire to go on one. However, having seen many pictures of people who do go on cruises, I can say with almost 100 percent certainty that if I *were* to ever go on a cruise, it would not be a nudist cruise.


i.dailymail.co.uk

But this cruise is 'different'... look, they're all relatively young and fit and tan and happy (attractive), and it's not a complete sausage fest like Fark ... I'm sure that's what all Bare Necessities cruises are like... take off your clothes and live a little!!
 
2014-02-19 08:16:40 PM  
I've only been on one cruise. It was pretty meh. Unless you like to eat constantly (and I mean constantly).

The concept of seeing my fellow cruise mates naked, however, is the most horrific, disgusting thing I can think of. And I've once had to eat my way out of a pit of dead babies.
Some people are just meant to wear clothes. Lots and lots of clothes.
 
2014-02-19 08:22:30 PM  
Good god, as if cruises weren't already breeding grounds for virulent diseases...
 
2014-02-19 08:23:34 PM  

Sofa King Smart: Pocket Ninja: I have never been on a cruise and have no particular desire to go on one. However, having seen many pictures of people who do go on cruises, I can say with almost 100 percent certainty that if I *were* to ever go on a cruise, it would not be a nudist cruise.

[i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x278]

But this cruise is 'different'... look, they're all relatively young and fit and tan and happy (attractive), and it's not a complete sausage fest like Fark ... I'm sure that's what all Bare Necessities cruises are like... take off your clothes and live a little!!


Yeah just like the pics of the hot babes on the dating site ads!  What, you don't like hot babes?
 
2014-02-19 08:27:34 PM  

Pocket Ninja: I have never been on a cruise and have no particular desire to go on one. However, having seen many pictures of people who do go on cruises, I can say with almost 100 percent certainty that if I *were* to ever go on a cruise, it would not be a nudist cruise.


I'm pretty sure it follows the same path as nudist colonies and nude beaches.  It's never the people you  want to see naked.  Evar.
 
2014-02-19 08:30:22 PM  

gja: K3rmy: Time for The Sailor Song!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qlti8Q-gU-Q

O....M....F.....G
How I  just laughed. It's a maritime themed rip-off of Barbie Girl.


I would venture a guess at 75 percent "Barbie Girl" and 25 percent "In the Navy"

Everyone else - SING ALONG AT WORK!!
 
2014-02-19 08:40:07 PM  

Pocket Ninja: sigdiamond2000: The constant explosive human feces or the nightmare marriage of rape and death?

The idea of being stuck on a freakin' boat for days at a time, surrounded by thousands of other people. The feces, rape, and death are simply additional nuances.


David?

/kicks younger self for not taking a class of his while at ISU in the late 90s
 
2014-02-19 08:41:36 PM  

BorgiaGinz: Pocket Ninja: sigdiamond2000: The constant explosive human feces or the nightmare marriage of rape and death?

The idea of being stuck on a freakin' boat for days at a time, surrounded by thousands of other people. The feces, rape, and death are simply additional nuances.

Cruises can be a useful and fun way to sample a geographic area. Instead of spending all your vacation time on one Caribbean island, you can visit half - a- dozen in the same time without having to unpack. The trick is to find ways to make a short day in each port meaningful and not allow yourself to be insulated in a prepackaged tourist bubble. Another benefit is you do all the traveling at night: each morning you wake up in a different port.

As with any travel, what you get out of a cruise depends on what you bring to it


Yep.  It's like being in a small resort that goes places while you sleep.  A lot of places that sound great from a distance aren't so great up close.  Of the places I've seen briefly during cruses, I'd like to spend more time at about 1/4 of them.  I haven't  disliked any places yet but 8 hours or so was enough for most.  And now I've got a short list of places that I'd like to visit for a few weeks and I already know I'll enjoy spending time there.
 
2014-02-19 08:42:01 PM  
A floating box of rape??
 
2014-02-19 08:49:41 PM  

BorgiaGinz: As with any travel, what you get out of a cruise depends on what you bring to it


I'm pretty sure that if you get norovirus out of it, that's not a result of what you brought to it.

For most of my life I've had a sort-of-want desire to one day go on a cruise but given the costs and all of the media horror stories, I think I will probably end up never going on one. On paper I like the idea but in practice it doesn't seem all that great.
 
2014-02-19 08:53:49 PM  

Creoena: - Cruise ships are floating petrie dishes...I got really sick (flu-like symptoms) on the Alaskan cruise and my friend got a really bad stomach bug on the Bahama one. Just imagine if everyone's putting their naked arse on everything you're touching/sitting on


Nudists normally sit on towels, not bare on the seat.
 
2014-02-19 08:59:49 PM  
That's the crudest news.
 
2014-02-19 09:03:45 PM  

Loren: Creoena: - Cruise ships are floating petrie dishes...I got really sick (flu-like symptoms) on the Alaskan cruise and my friend got a really bad stomach bug on the Bahama one. Just imagine if everyone's putting their naked arse on everything you're touching/sitting on

Nudists normally sit on towels, not bare on the seat.


Personally I prefer to carry my towel around in the form of shorts. It's simpler than having to keep a towel on hand and spread it out before sitting.
 
2014-02-19 09:04:15 PM  
On a nude cruise if you follow people up the stairs, they all look alike.
 
2014-02-19 09:08:56 PM  

Breech Birth: On a nude cruise if you follow people up the stairs, they all look alike.


A few weeks at sea will do that to you, from what I'm told...................
 
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