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(Daily Star)   A pig like that, you don't eat all at once   (dailystar.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Interesting  
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8312 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Feb 2014 at 9:36 PM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



37 Comments     (+0 »)
 
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-02-18 05:35:23 PM  
Obligatory

i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-18 09:03:24 PM  
A travelling salesman drove past a farm one day and noticed a pig with one wooden leg. He didn't think much of it until a week later, driving by the same farm, the pig had two wooden legs. The third week, the pig had three wooden legs, and finally, after seeing the pig the fourth week with four wooden legs, he had to stop to inquire about it.

He tracked down the farmer and asked him about the strange sight. The farmer told him, "Well, that's the greatest pig alive. About a month ago, he saved my wife and kids and me from our burning house by waking us up in the middle of the night just in time to escape without any harm!"

The salesman continue to prod the farmer about the pig's wooden legs. "Well," the farmer replied, "this pig is just like one of the family. He's a really great pig. A couple of weeks ago, our youngest boy fell in the creek, and this truly wonderful pig fished him out just in time to save him from drowning! He's one really great pig!"

The salesman, starting to lose his patience, again inquired about the wooden legs, to which the farmer replied, "Last week, I fell off my horse and my foot got caught up in the stirrup. This great pig ran along side of the horse and me and untangled me and truly saved my life. What a great pig - the greatest pig in the world!!"

Losing his patience, the salesman finally shouted, "All right already, That's enough! He's a really great pig - a REALLY great pig! But what about his wooden legs?!"

To which the farmer replied, "Well now, a great pig like that - you don't eat him all at once!"

/Prairie Home Companion
 
2014-02-18 09:25:48 PM  
No mention of the horrendous environmental pollution that probably caused the defect.

My wife's former roommate from China would always wash vegetables, especially lettuce and cabbage, with dish soap after she brought it home to get rid of pesticide residue. It was a habit she brought over from China to Seattle with her.
 
2014-02-18 09:41:08 PM  
www.vegetarianfriends.net
 
2014-02-18 09:43:38 PM  
Photos provided by Caters.

Nummy.
 
2014-02-18 09:49:11 PM  
Some Pig.
 
2014-02-18 09:52:02 PM  
4.bp.blogspot.com

THIS is a pig you don't eat all at once.

/drool
 
2014-02-18 09:53:33 PM  
Though you damn well try!
 
2014-02-18 09:56:06 PM  
A pig like that you sell tickets for as long as you can. Then you make bacon.
 
2014-02-18 10:02:15 PM  
It's nice to know that terms like 'mad skills' are approved journalistic language.
 
2014-02-18 10:09:43 PM  
A pig like that
deformed from Mother,
Forget that pig
And find another
One with legs behind
Stick to the pork rinds
A pig like that
Will give you sorrow
You'll eat another pig tomorrow
One that's not maligned
No regrets when you have dined
 
2014-02-18 10:12:24 PM  
He can make it on his own!
 
2014-02-18 10:22:28 PM  
All around a pigs ass is pork bur I still like a good bacon sandwich
 
2014-02-18 10:25:51 PM  
Thats some pig

Homer Zuckermman
 
2014-02-18 10:33:09 PM  
Seeing that makes me kinda wish I didn't eat meat.
 
2014-02-18 10:34:53 PM  
FTFA:  A PIG born with just two legs has stunned its owners by learning to walk on his single pair of trotters.

i759.photobucket.com
 
2014-02-18 10:35:51 PM  

Candygram4Mongo: A travelling salesman drove past a farm one day and noticed a pig with one wooden leg. He didn't think much of it until a week later, driving by the same farm, the pig had two wooden legs. The third week, the pig had three wooden legs, and finally, after seeing the pig the fourth week with four wooden legs, he had to stop to inquire about it.

He tracked down the farmer and asked him about the strange sight. The farmer told him, "Well, that's the greatest pig alive. About a month ago, he saved my wife and kids and me from our burning house by waking us up in the middle of the night just in time to escape without any harm!"

The salesman continue to prod the farmer about the pig's wooden legs. "Well," the farmer replied, "this pig is just like one of the family. He's a really great pig. A couple of weeks ago, our youngest boy fell in the creek, and this truly wonderful pig fished him out just in time to save him from drowning! He's one really great pig!"

The salesman, starting to lose his patience, again inquired about the wooden legs, to which the farmer replied, "Last week, I fell off my horse and my foot got caught up in the stirrup. This great pig ran along side of the horse and me and untangled me and truly saved my life. What a great pig - the greatest pig in the world!!"

Losing his patience, the salesman finally shouted, "All right already, That's enough! He's a really great pig - a REALLY great pig! But what about his wooden legs?!"

To which the farmer replied, "Well now, a great pig like that - you don't eat him all at once!"

/Prairie Home Companion


I wonder who originally came up with this joke? I'm pretty sure I saw Pete Barbutti tell it on Johnny Carson (that's what we hipsters used to call The Tonight Show back in the day) long before PHC.
 
2014-02-18 10:44:21 PM  
Ms Duan, owner of the pig said: "I noticed that there was something weird about the pig when it was being breast fed by it's mother.
"So I took a closer look and noticed he didn't have any back legs. That's when I came up with this wonderful new marketing scheme..."


growingupnatural.com
 
2014-02-18 10:45:37 PM  

Buttle not Tuttle: He can make it on his own!


www.digitaltrends.com
 
2014-02-18 10:48:28 PM  
For some reason that is my favorite joke ever.
 
2014-02-18 11:08:33 PM  

phlegmmo: Obligatory


God help me, I giggle every time I see that.
 
2014-02-18 11:08:57 PM  
Didn't need that many shots of the quivering underbelly.
 
2014-02-18 11:11:01 PM  

AverageAmericanGuy: No mention of the horrendous environmental pollution that probably caused the defect.

My wife's former roommate from China would always wash vegetables, especially lettuce and cabbage, with dish soap after she brought it home to get rid of pesticide residue. It was a habit she brought over from China to Seattle with her.


Dish soap?  Uggh...I suppose a little soap residue beats DDT.
 
2014-02-18 11:14:05 PM  

phlegmmo: Obligatory


What the everlovin'........I'm mesmerized.......
 
2014-02-18 11:45:19 PM  
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-02-18 11:45:24 PM  
...and with a girl like that, you know you should be glad...
 
2014-02-19 12:12:41 AM  
www.sott.net
 
2014-02-19 12:29:29 AM  
ABQGOD: ...and with a girl love like that, you know you should be glad...

ftfy
 
2014-02-19 04:24:41 AM  
Well, they are smarter than dogs so it's no surprise.

Lean pork exists, in the wild, numbers in the millions in TX alone. And they will kill you and eat you given the chance. They can also jump fences.
 
2014-02-19 04:52:16 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: No mention of the horrendous environmental pollution that probably caused the defect.

My wife's former roommate from China would always wash vegetables, especially lettuce and cabbage, with dish soap after she brought it home to get rid of pesticide residue. It was a habit she brought over from China to Seattle with her.


Sigh, it's not for pesticide residue. It's for food borne diseases like worm eggs and food-poisoning bacteria. There are worse things than pesticide residue.

In fact, Chinese will never eat their vegetables raw. They will cook the lettuce and you will never get someone from China to enjoy a salad.
 
2014-02-19 09:27:34 AM  
Reminds me of that critter from Galaxy Quest.
 
2014-02-19 10:07:05 AM  

mr0x: AverageAmericanGuy: No mention of the horrendous environmental pollution that probably caused the defect.

My wife's former roommate from China would always wash vegetables, especially lettuce and cabbage, with dish soap after she brought it home to get rid of pesticide residue. It was a habit she brought over from China to Seattle with her.

Sigh, it's not for pesticide residue. It's for food borne diseases like worm eggs and food-poisoning bacteria. There are worse things than pesticide residue.

In fact, Chinese will never eat their vegetables raw. They will cook the lettuce and you will never get someone from China to enjoy a salad.


And fecal matter. And urine.

Where do you think people who harvest food go to the bathroom, in all countries?
Not everyone "steps away".
 
2014-02-19 11:12:10 AM  
Ugh, I don't want to look up it's anus all the time.  instead of making it work to be normal, use it's celebrity money to get two wheels stapled to it's sides, so it can move without it's nose getting full of dirt.
 
2014-02-19 11:37:03 AM  

IronJelly: Ugh, I don't want to look up it's anus all the time.  instead of making it work to be normal, use it's celebrity money to get two wheels stapled to it's sides, so it can move without it's nose getting full of dirt.


Four apostrophes too many.
 
2014-02-19 12:15:54 PM  

bring to a festering boil: IronJelly: Ugh, I don't want to look up it's anus all the time.  instead of making it work to be normal, use it's celebrity money to get two wheels stapled to it's sides, so it can move without it's nose getting full of dirt.

Four apostrophes too many.


that's what you take away from my suggestion to staple it?  i need to work on my trolling.
 
2014-02-19 04:31:09 PM  
"I noticed that there was something weird about the pig when it was being breast fed by it's mother"

So even professionals can't spell.
 
2014-02-19 11:04:19 PM  
s.mlkshk.com
 
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