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(Washington Post)   Dear Prudie: I'm a live-in nanny who works for this totally annoying couple, so I secretly made them drink toilet water. Now they're both sick. Should I feel bad?   (live.washingtonpost.com) divider line 178
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16597 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Feb 2014 at 2:10 PM (32 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-02-18 05:04:31 PM

Anne.Uumellmahaye: Can everybody chill out about the "men wear whatever they want in the comfort of their home" thing?

He was creepy. For many reasons. One example was that he only ever wore boxers, nothing else. Another example was that his kids didn't like him. I punctuated it by saying he was an insufferable douche. I was just relating a story about being a nanny, holy hell.


This is fark.  One of the fundamental tenets of fark is that we know more, based on a few lines or a paragraph, about a situation then the people who were actually there.  usually, this principle is applied by creating fantastic solutions or whimsical scenarios based on scant articles.
 
2014-02-18 05:06:56 PM

omeganuepsilon: Meh. I don't see any difference if it was later in the night. Get up annoyed at the squealing, yell at the kids, go back to bed.

Some people just don't care what other's see them in. Nothing creepy about that. Hell, on the random occasion someone walks in on me when I'm on the john, I laugh at their reactions(and give them hell the rest of the day as if I was offended, because ribbing people is fun!). I get dirty at work, I'm not ashamed to stop by the store and pick up milk or eggs on the way home. I get particularly filthy, and I strip down to boxers when I walk in the door. I don't flaunt my beer gut or anything, but it's just the thing to do because you don't want to get machine oil and grime on stuff because it never comes out of anything. Meh, whatever.

It may appear gross to an onlooker, but it is not innately creepy, it's utilitarian.

3pm though, everyone's gathered around the birthday cake waiting on the special girl to blow out the candles, that's a different story, and very creepy.

Of course, anything can be creepy with the wrong maneurisms or outright leering or something, but that's all also creepy fully clothed.


YOu really do not see the difference in how you approach an late teenage\early twenties male and how you approach a bunch of 8 and 9 year old girls?  You honestly think that going into a room full of 9 year old girls in your underwear is a acceptable.  Grab a robe, grab a blanket, only stick your head in, whatever.
 
2014-02-18 05:07:37 PM

Farce-Side: Peki: That last letter got me a little.

I hear that all the time. "There's so much help out there if you just ASK for it!"

No there isn't. And be prepared for everyone to judge you horribly just for asking, and a very long time before you can get anything that even remotely looks like  real help.

But I guess that's an irresponsible thing to say to someone who is considering suicide.

Kill yourself.


aw, did his mostly true sentiment of the reality of not being wealthy in america cause you to lash out in anger to avoid sympathy... again?
 
2014-02-18 05:08:09 PM

MycroftHolmes: omeganuepsilon: Meh. I don't see any difference if it was later in the night. Get up annoyed at the squealing, yell at the kids, go back to bed.

Some people just don't care what other's see them in. Nothing creepy about that. Hell, on the random occasion someone walks in on me when I'm on the john, I laugh at their reactions(and give them hell the rest of the day as if I was offended, because ribbing people is fun!). I get dirty at work, I'm not ashamed to stop by the store and pick up milk or eggs on the way home. I get particularly filthy, and I strip down to boxers when I walk in the door. I don't flaunt my beer gut or anything, but it's just the thing to do because you don't want to get machine oil and grime on stuff because it never comes out of anything. Meh, whatever.

It may appear gross to an onlooker, but it is not innately creepy, it's utilitarian.

3pm though, everyone's gathered around the birthday cake waiting on the special girl to blow out the candles, that's a different story, and very creepy.

Of course, anything can be creepy with the wrong maneurisms or outright leering or something, but that's all also creepy fully clothed.

YOu really do not see the difference in how you approach an late teenage\early twenties male and how you approach a bunch of 8 and 9 year old girls?  You honestly think that going into a room full of 9 year old girls in your underwear is a acceptable.  Grab a robe, grab a blanket, only stick your head in, whatever.


So you must never go to the beach huh?
 
2014-02-18 05:13:45 PM

Egoy3k: Before I respond I'd like to say that I was pretty harsh in my post and I regretted it after clicking add comment.

What i mean is that he probably got straight out of bed, threw on the shirt in concession to there being guests and told you to quiet down.  I'm not sure though, maybe he was a complete pedo but it seems to me that most of the creepy vibes people get about dads are because of the constant fear mongering in the media. As an uncle with a young niece I've gotten the looks and the double checks enough that I know exactly what some people think when they see a man and a child together and it disgusts me whenever time with my niece is ruined by idiots.

I was bringing my niece home from soccer practice once and my brother called me and asked me if I would take her for supper because he was late leaving work and wouldn't be home until after supper time.  Being the completely terrible role model that I am I took her to McDonald's.  So we got our meals and drove to a rest stop to eat.  The next thing I know I'm explaining to a police officer who I am and what I am doing with this girl while another officer is terrifying my niece and asking her questions.  Some busybody at the rest stop had hear my niece call me by my first name and called the cops because I clearly wasn't her father. Which is why I reacted poorly to the post.  People assuming that male interactions with children are inappropriate is not good and isn't going to lead to good things.


I don't think he was anything more than a cold, awkward guy who just didn't have the first clue of how to interact with kids (which was weird because he had a few). And the reality of the situation was most likely exactly as you described. When I say I was creeped out, I don't mean I started crying, or I went home and told my mom that my friend's dad was wandering around in his undies. There was no aftermath. It was just a weird moment that I still remember 20 years later.

The media fear mongering thing is a separate and very real issue that I worry about a lot about. There's a line between fighting for equality and rights and vilifying half the human race and it should be pretty damn broad and obvious but somehow people manage to miss it completely.
 
2014-02-18 05:16:02 PM

Egoy3k: MycroftHolmes: omeganuepsilon: Meh. I don't see any difference if it was later in the night. Get up annoyed at the squealing, yell at the kids, go back to bed.

Some people just don't care what other's see them in. Nothing creepy about that. Hell, on the random occasion someone walks in on me when I'm on the john, I laugh at their reactions(and give them hell the rest of the day as if I was offended, because ribbing people is fun!). I get dirty at work, I'm not ashamed to stop by the store and pick up milk or eggs on the way home. I get particularly filthy, and I strip down to boxers when I walk in the door. I don't flaunt my beer gut or anything, but it's just the thing to do because you don't want to get machine oil and grime on stuff because it never comes out of anything. Meh, whatever.

It may appear gross to an onlooker, but it is not innately creepy, it's utilitarian.

3pm though, everyone's gathered around the birthday cake waiting on the special girl to blow out the candles, that's a different story, and very creepy.

Of course, anything can be creepy with the wrong maneurisms or outright leering or something, but that's all also creepy fully clothed.

YOu really do not see the difference in how you approach an late teenage\early twenties male and how you approach a bunch of 8 and 9 year old girls?  You honestly think that going into a room full of 9 year old girls in your underwear is a acceptable.  Grab a robe, grab a blanket, only stick your head in, whatever.

So you must never go to the beach huh?


Yep, I do.  And I would find a guy in a speedo approaching a bunch of 8 year old girls a little questionable too.

And no, underwear!=swimsuits.  Swimsuits are meant to be outer wear, underwear is not.  There is both a functional difference in the garments, as well as a context.
 
2014-02-18 05:16:45 PM

Egoy3k: the_vicious_fez: I was about 7 or 8 years old at a sleepover (all girls) and at some point that night my friend's dad wandered in to ask us to keep it down. He was in a shirt and a pair of obviously well-aged tighty whities. It was horrifying, and creepy as fark

Did he touch you? Did he ask you to touch him? Did he take photos of you? Did he expose himself to you? No?  Then the only person being anything was you being a drama queen.


No, I have 3 daughters, and if any other kids are at the house you put on shorts, period.
 
2014-02-18 05:22:17 PM
Egoy3k:

So you must never go to the beach huh?

Context is important here. I don't see a lot of guys walking down the street in speedos and being that I don't live near a beach, if I did I'd be anywhere from vaguely amused to somewhat alarmed, depending on what else he had with him, his general mannerisms, the time of day, etc.

Pirsig said it best: 'There is only one kind of person, Phædrus said, who accepts or rejects the mythos in which he lives. And the definition of that person, when he has rejected the mythos, Phædrus said, is "insane." To go outside the mythos is to become insane.'

I'm not saying anyone who colors outside the lines of propriety is insane. Pirsig is, but I think even he would agree that degree matters. However, those who choose to reject the trappings of society incur a price, and that price might be weird looks or suspicion, depending on which rules they choose to break.

I'm not trolling. I'm just trying to explain a very complicated thought process over a low bandwidth medium to a bunch of people I've never met. It's not going to work and I know it's not going to work because, once again, we don't share context and context is important, but fark it I'll try anyway.
 
2014-02-18 05:23:52 PM
Many, MANY guys don't own or would never wear a bathrobe. Hugh Hefner was known for always wearing his velour one. And anyhow, the arbitrary definition of "creepy" we seem  to be pushing close to "hang this person that I don't like because I project my issues onto him, which is good enough to begin speculating what awful things he must do, just because I was bitten by a retarded spider and got off kilter senses. Now excuse me while I drink this margarita this handsome charming fellow at the bar just brought me."
 
2014-02-18 05:27:28 PM

the_vicious_fez: those who choose to reject the trappings of society incur a price


Society ends at the threshold. Enter a home? Expect nudity.
 
2014-02-18 05:28:17 PM

Fano: Many, MANY guys don't own or would never wear a bathrobe. Hugh Hefner was known for always wearing his velour one. And anyhow, the arbitrary definition of "creepy" we seem  to be pushing close to "hang this person that I don't like because I project my issues onto him, which is good enough to begin speculating what awful things he must do, just because I was bitten by a retarded spider and got off kilter senses. Now excuse me while I drink this margarita this handsome charming fellow at the bar just brought me."


Every guy I know has a bathrobe, a pair of sweatpants, a pair of pajama bottoms, or a pair of gym shorts that can be slipped on very easily.  I know of no one that does not have a garment of some sort that could not be easily put on.
 
2014-02-18 05:29:03 PM

Fano: Many, MANY guys don't own or would never wear a bathrobe. Hugh Hefner was known for always wearing his velour one. And anyhow, the arbitrary definition of "creepy" we seem  to be pushing close to "hang this person that I don't like because I project my issues onto him, which is good enough to begin speculating what awful things he must do, just because I was bitten by a retarded spider and got off kilter senses. Now excuse me while I drink this margarita this handsome charming fellow at the bar just brought me."


I was 8. I didn't have issues. I wasn't subjected to media scare tactics. My parents were wonderful people. I was never abused as a child. But it was a weird moment and it made me uncomfortable. Then. I want to stress this. This isn't me reflecting back over two decades and deciding in retrospect that I was uncomfortable. This was what I felt at the time.I can't precisely explain why, but that's the way it was, and I'll thank you not to go around victim-blaming 8 year olds.
 
2014-02-18 05:30:07 PM
Some years ago I worked as a handyman for a very nice, reasonably wealthy lady. She had a dalmation that drank from the toilet. One fine day her kid said the dog was drinking from the toilet and added "I hope it was flushed this time".

/and a good time was had by all
 
2014-02-18 05:31:46 PM

the_vicious_fez: Fano: Many, MANY guys don't own or would never wear a bathrobe. Hugh Hefner was known for always wearing his velour one. And anyhow, the arbitrary definition of "creepy" we seem  to be pushing close to "hang this person that I don't like because I project my issues onto him, which is good enough to begin speculating what awful things he must do, just because I was bitten by a retarded spider and got off kilter senses. Now excuse me while I drink this margarita this handsome charming fellow at the bar just brought me."

I was 8. I didn't have issues. I wasn't subjected to media scare tactics. My parents were wonderful people. I was never abused as a child. But it was a weird moment and it made me uncomfortable. Then. I want to stress this. This isn't me reflecting back over two decades and deciding in retrospect that I was uncomfortable. This was what I felt at the time.I can't precisely explain why, but that's the way it was, and I'll thank you not to go around victim-blaming 8 year olds.


And I realized just after posting that "victim-blaming" is really not the phrase I wanted there. I wasn't a victim. But it was weird.
 
2014-02-18 05:32:43 PM

endmile: Why is this being linked to on Washington Post? They just reprint Prudie from Slate. What happened to linking to the original content?


WaPo owns Slate and they're desperate for clicks.
 
2014-02-18 05:36:32 PM

the_vicious_fez: the_vicious_fez: Fano: Many, MANY guys don't own or would never wear a bathrobe. Hugh Hefner was known for always wearing his velour one. And anyhow, the arbitrary definition of "creepy" we seem  to be pushing close to "hang this person that I don't like because I project my issues onto him, which is good enough to begin speculating what awful things he must do, just because I was bitten by a retarded spider and got off kilter senses. Now excuse me while I drink this margarita this handsome charming fellow at the bar just brought me."

I was 8. I didn't have issues. I wasn't subjected to media scare tactics. My parents were wonderful people. I was never abused as a child. But it was a weird moment and it made me uncomfortable. Then. I want to stress this. This isn't me reflecting back over two decades and deciding in retrospect that I was uncomfortable. This was what I felt at the time.I can't precisely explain why, but that's the way it was, and I'll thank you not to go around victim-blaming 8 year olds.

And I realized just after posting that "victim-blaming" is really not the phrase I wanted there. I wasn't a victim. But it was weird.


I thought your post was reasonable in the first place. It's the adults that I'm aiming this more for.
 
2014-02-18 05:40:04 PM

Fano: I thought your post was reasonable in the first place. It's the adults that I'm aiming this more for.


My bad. Carry on.
 
2014-02-18 05:45:12 PM

Egoy3k: I was bringing my niece home from soccer practice once and my brother called me and asked me if I would take her for supper because he was late leaving work and wouldn't be home until after supper time. Being the completely terrible role model that I am I took her to McDonald's.


I love my oldest niece, who was born when I was 20, and take some credit for helping to raise her. When she got too big/heavy to carry around on my shoulders I was kind of disappointed. We'd go to the park, to neighborhood pool, I'd take her with me when I had to go shopping (and buy her candy she wasn't supposed to have, of course), and so on. My attitude was more or less non-authoritarian (you can't let a 6 year old do everything she wants) and it was pretty clear to anybody who paid attention that I wasn't her father (or at least not a traditional one), but this was the late '80s so it predated the whole "OMG! PEDOPHILE!" thing.

If anyone asked or showed curiosity I'd tell 'em "my sister's kid, I'm free day care," but mostly nobody seemed that worried about it: old ladies thought it was cute (and would guess "Your niece?"), women around my age would flirt a little (and seemed to want reassurance that I wasn't her divorced father), and nobody marched up and demanded an explanation or called the frigging cops. It wasn't such a big deal that a grown man and little girl could enjoy each other's company without the man bossing the kid around all the time.

These days I'd want a signed and notarized letter from my sister explaining the relationship and giving her cell phone number in case the cops just had to interrupt her at work. "So she's sitting on my lap in the park feeding me a popsickle. Get your mind out of the gutter!"

By the way, she grew up to be hottie (at least by Fark standards) but her gorgeous, smart, sort-of sophisticated & very well-formed girlfriend is more my type. Dammit. "Dear Prudie: I finally met the woman of my dreams but she's marrying my niece. Why is life so UNFAIR?"
 
2014-02-18 05:45:18 PM

the_vicious_fez: That's what bathrobes are for.


As any alert farker can tell you, there's another excellent reason for guys to wear a bathrobe around the house.

static3.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-02-18 05:46:25 PM

MBooda: the_vicious_fez: That's what bathrobes are for.

As any alert farker can tell you, there's another excellent reason for guys to wear a bathrobe around the house.

[static3.wikia.nocookie.net image 300x430]


Actually, the lesson there is "NO SLATTED CHAIRS"
 
2014-02-18 05:49:09 PM
s1.dmcdn.net
 
2014-02-18 05:52:38 PM

MycroftHolmes: And no, underwear!=swimsuits. Swimsuits are meant to be outer wear, underwear is not. There is both a functional difference in the garments, as well as a context.


And underwear hides more skin. And a hot young woman can walk around on the beach wearing a mostly imaginary thong and a tiny bikini top and it's perfectly okay: if you ogle her or talk to her you're obviously a creepy rapoid lecher because this isn't a strip bar you pervert.
 
2014-02-18 05:58:44 PM

doglover: the_vicious_fez: those who choose to reject the trappings of society incur a price

Society ends at the threshold. Enter a home? Expect nudity.


Come in my home? Either wear a hazmat suit or figure that "living in a dumpster" ain't killed me yet.

And don't object if you see me in an Eeyore costume with a vodka bottle up my butt. Especially now that you've been warned.
 
2014-02-18 06:05:33 PM

the_vicious_fez: MycroftHolmes: MycroftHolmes: durbnpoisn: Anne.Uumellmahaye: I was a live-in nanny in college. The dad was an insufferable douche who would walk around in only boxers from the time he came home from work till the time he left again in the morning.

I used to want to tell him, there's a reason your children are all huddled at my door waiting for me to wake up and let them in first thing in the morning. You are creepy. Even your offspring sense it.

That reminds me of a story...

We used to all hang out in this one guy's basement.  You know, late night beer parties and such.  More than a few times, I'd go by the kitchen on my way out and find the stepfather standing at the fridge in his underwear.  One time I actually said to him, "dude...  Really?"  His response was, "It's my house. I can do what I want."

Okay, fine.  Be that as it may.  But you should consider having some respect for your guests.

You weren't a guest.  And he was sending a pretty clear message about what he thought about you.  You were just too dumb to get the message.

Sorry, that should have read 'you weren't his guest'.

I was about 7 or 8 years old at a sleepover (all girls) and at some point that night my friend's dad wandered in to ask us to keep it down. He was in a shirt and a pair of obviously well-aged tighty whities. It was horrifying, and creepy as fark.

/actually, that guy in general was creepy as fark. Never liked him.


Yeah, that isn't right. I don't even hang out in underwear in front of my step kids and they are effectively family.
 
2014-02-18 06:05:39 PM

the_vicious_fez: Fano: I thought your post was reasonable in the first place. It's the adults that I'm aiming this more for.

My bad. Carry on.


Sorry. I guess my post meandered a little. I just wanted to remind people that pedos/rapists/perverts can be perfectly charming and respectable, and that some people marked as "creeps" can be harmless normals with mediocre/poor social skills with little awareness of what their behavior looks like to others. Combine that with being unattractive or unpleasant, and you have a witch hunt in the making. I just know that I have had drama queen friends that magnify some people's weird habits into full fledged assumptions.

On point again, the person in Prudie's column is a horrid human being.
 
2014-02-18 06:06:50 PM
the_vicious_fez:

I'll thank you not to go around victim-blaming 8 year olds.

You weren't victimized. You'd been victimizing him or he wouldn't have had to stomp in there in the middle of the night to you kids to pipe down.

"Victimized" is when he comes in naked with handcuffs and ball gags and announces it's Party Time.
 
2014-02-18 06:10:34 PM

The One True TheDavid: the_vicious_fez:

I'll thank you not to go around victim-blaming 8 year olds.

You weren't victimized. You'd been victimizing him or he wouldn't have had to stomp in there in the middle of the night to tell you kids to pipe down.

"Victimized" is when he comes in naked with handcuffs and ball gags and announces it's Party Time.


FTFM. And I've got to learn how to use that vertical line.
 
2014-02-18 06:14:00 PM
This sounds like a good springboard for a weird update on the old "Who would you marry/f*ck/kill?" question.

You're a live-in nanny for a celebrity couple. Out of these choices, who would you keep working for, who would you have a threesome with, and who would you poison? Your choices are Will and Jada Smith, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, and Kanye West and Kim Kardashian.
 
2014-02-18 06:20:24 PM

EdgeRunner: This sounds like a good springboard for a weird update on the old "Who would you marry/f*ck/kill?" question.

You're a live-in nanny for a celebrity couple. Out of these choices, who would you keep working for, who would you have a threesome with, and who would you poison? Your choices are Will and Jada Smith, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, and Kanye West and Kim Kardashian.


I'd kill Kayne and kidnap Kim.
 
2014-02-18 06:20:25 PM
I posit that if you're a dude that's so self-conscious about bundling up your junk under multiple layers when interacting with kids in your house, then  you'rethe one that's sexualizing the interaction, not the people walking around their own house in boxers. Seriously, I was born in Germany and raised by German parents and whenever I tell my American friends that I've seen both my mom and dad naked countless times, I get surprised responses, as if there's nothing more shocking and unusual than parents and their kids seeing each other naked.
 
2014-02-18 06:23:34 PM
i.imgur.com

/everybody does it
 
2014-02-18 06:24:47 PM

MycroftHolmes: omeganuepsilon: Meh. I don't see any difference if it was later in the night. Get up annoyed at the squealing, yell at the kids, go back to bed.

Some people just don't care what other's see them in. Nothing creepy about that. Hell, on the random occasion someone walks in on me when I'm on the john, I laugh at their reactions(and give them hell the rest of the day as if I was offended, because ribbing people is fun!). I get dirty at work, I'm not ashamed to stop by the store and pick up milk or eggs on the way home. I get particularly filthy, and I strip down to boxers when I walk in the door. I don't flaunt my beer gut or anything, but it's just the thing to do because you don't want to get machine oil and grime on stuff because it never comes out of anything. Meh, whatever.

It may appear gross to an onlooker, but it is not innately creepy, it's utilitarian.

3pm though, everyone's gathered around the birthday cake waiting on the special girl to blow out the candles, that's a different story, and very creepy.

Of course, anything can be creepy with the wrong maneurisms or outright leering or something, but that's all also creepy fully clothed.

YOu really do not see the difference in how you approach an late teenage\early twenties male and how you approach a bunch of 8 and 9 year old girls?  You honestly think that going into a room full of 9 year old girls in your underwear is a acceptable.  Grab a robe, grab a blanket, only stick your head in, whatever.


Or just do what I did when the girls had sleepovers. Yell "Shut the fark Up!" I was always fully clothed, but I never censored my mouth. I'm sure some kids went home complaining about that.
 
2014-02-18 06:25:17 PM
Jees-
I was going to comment about the nanny and her felonious assault of her employers, but you all just want to talk about underpants and pedo's.
 
2014-02-18 06:25:44 PM

mantabulous: I posit that if you're a dude that's so self-conscious about bundling up your junk under multiple layers when interacting with kids in your house, then  you'rethe one that's sexualizing the interaction, not the people walking around their own house in boxers. Seriously, I was born in Germany and raised by German parents and whenever I tell my American friends that I've seen both my mom and dad naked countless times, I get surprised responses, as if there's nothing more shocking and unusual than parents and their kids seeing each other naked.


Context matters.  In a culture where that type of exposure is the norm, it is not outside of the norm.  When it isn't the norm, it is abnormal.  I know this comment sounds stupid, but it is because I am having to state the terribly obvious.
 
2014-02-18 06:26:19 PM

MycroftHolmes: Fano: Many, MANY guys don't own or would never wear a bathrobe. Hugh Hefner was known for always wearing his velour one. And anyhow, the arbitrary definition of "creepy" we seem  to be pushing close to "hang this person that I don't like because I project my issues onto him, which is good enough to begin speculating what awful things he must do, just because I was bitten by a retarded spider and got off kilter senses. Now excuse me while I drink this margarita this handsome charming fellow at the bar just brought me."

Every guy I know has a bathrobe, a pair of sweatpants, a pair of pajama bottoms, or a pair of gym shorts that can be slipped on very easily.  I know of no one that does not have a garment of some sort that could not be easily put on.


Please tell us what the functional difference between a pair of gym shorts and a pair of boxer shorts is.  If someone of any age or sex sleeps at my house they run the risk encountering me in my shorts on my way to the piss parlor at 2 AM.

While it isn't my thing I am also aware of many cultures that don't really concern themselves with non sexual nudity so I have a really hard time understanding how non-sexual non-nudity is such an issue in ours.  If I have guests of any age would I wear my old boxers with the button that doesn't always stay buttoned? No. Would I go hunting in the dark or turn on a light to wake up my wife just to find a different pair of shorts that covers me no more than my boxers? No.
 
2014-02-18 06:29:20 PM

durbnpoisn: Anne.Uumellmahaye: I was a live-in nanny in college. The dad was an insufferable douche who would walk around in only boxers from the time he came home from work till the time he left again in the morning.

I used to want to tell him, there's a reason your children are all huddled at my door waiting for me to wake up and let them in first thing in the morning. You are creepy. Even your offspring sense it.

That reminds me of a story...

We used to all hang out in this one guy's basement.  You know, late night beer parties and such.  More than a few times, I'd go by the kitchen on my way out and find the stepfather standing at the fridge in his underwear.  One time I actually said to him, "dude...  Really?"  His response was, "It's my house. I can do what I want."

Okay, fine.  Be that as it may.  But you should consider having some respect for your guests.


I told my roomate to stop banging dudes in the living room or I would come out of my room naked and ask if I could tag in.
 
2014-02-18 06:30:35 PM

EdgeRunner: This sounds like a good springboard for a weird update on the old "Who would you marry/f*ck/kill?" question.

You're a live-in nanny for a celebrity couple. Out of these choices, who would you keep working for, who would you have a threesome with, and who would you poison? Your choices are Will and Jada Smith, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, and Kanye West and Kim Kardashian.


I guess I'd take the threesome with Kim and Jada. Will and Brad seem cool to work for, but I'm willing to work for Jolie, too. Poison for KW. That work?
 
2014-02-18 06:39:14 PM

Egoy3k: MycroftHolmes: Fano: Many, MANY guys don't own or would never wear a bathrobe. Hugh Hefner was known for always wearing his velour one. And anyhow, the arbitrary definition of "creepy" we seem  to be pushing close to "hang this person that I don't like because I project my issues onto him, which is good enough to begin speculating what awful things he must do, just because I was bitten by a retarded spider and got off kilter senses. Now excuse me while I drink this margarita this handsome charming fellow at the bar just brought me."

Every guy I know has a bathrobe, a pair of sweatpants, a pair of pajama bottoms, or a pair of gym shorts that can be slipped on very easily.  I know of no one that does not have a garment of some sort that could not be easily put on.

Please tell us what the functional difference between a pair of gym shorts and a pair of boxer shorts is.  If someone of any age or sex sleeps at my house they run the risk encountering me in my shorts on my way to the piss parlor at 2 AM.

While it isn't my thing I am also aware of many cultures that don't really concern themselves with non sexual nudity so I have a really hard time understanding how non-sexual non-nudity is such an issue in ours.  If I have guests of any age would I wear my old boxers with the button that doesn't always stay buttoned? No. Would I go hunting in the dark or turn on a light to wake up my wife just to find a different pair of shorts that covers me no more than my boxers? No.


I'm hoping for some unironic biatching about puritan americans
 
2014-02-18 06:41:29 PM
LOL. And you people biatch and moan about nipplegate. YOU are the reason crap like that happens, you farking prudes.
 
2014-02-18 06:51:40 PM
Yes, and if they die, you could be on the hook for involuntary manslaughter. Now don't you feel stupid?
 
2014-02-18 07:05:59 PM
Well, if it weren't for the Dad's hiden-nanny-toilet-cam, he would have drunk that toilet water. As it is, he's too busy watching the nanny MAKE water. So no harm, no foul (odor).
 
2014-02-18 07:11:56 PM
Egoy3k:If I have guests of any age would I wear my old boxers with the button that doesn't always stay buttoned? No. Would I go hunting in the dark or turn on a light to wake up my wife just to find a different pair of shorts that covers me no more than my boxers? No.

I have a possibly unreasonable dislike towards briefs. Boxers I'm fine with, and it could be because I've just never seen really worn out boxers. But there's something about cotton briefs that makes them look dingy and ratty the second they come out of the bag and they never fit right and things only go downhill from there. Also, they tend to display everything in the least flattering way.

Which isn't to say that I want to dictate people's underwear choices. But boxers seem more presentable somehow. I dunno. I'm weird.
 
2014-02-18 07:17:00 PM
Dear Prudie,

I committed a crime, possibly a felony, against my employer, and then I provided enough information in a public forum to identify myself. Should I simply end my life, or await my inevitable arrest?

Signed, an idiot.
 
2014-02-18 07:32:06 PM

the_vicious_fez: Spirit Hammer: the_vicious_fez: Egoy3k: the_vicious_fez: I was about 7 or 8 years old at a sleepover (all girls) and at some point that night my friend's dad wandered in to ask us to keep it down. He was in a shirt and a pair of obviously well-aged tighty whities. It was horrifying, and creepy as fark

Did he touch you? Did he ask you to touch him? Did he take photos of you? Did he expose himself to you? No?  Then the only person being anything was you being a drama queen.

It was a room full of 8 year old girls, it was late, it was dark, and he just gave off bad vibes constantly. I'm not saying it was flat out wrong, I'm just saying I, as an 8 year old who didn't know this guy well, was weirded out. My parents never walked around in their undies in my house. That's what bathrobes are for.

If I have to get up in the middle of the night to tell a gaggle of giggly girls to STFU, it's doubtful that I would stop for a robe.

Your choice. But for the sake of the hypothetical 8 year old girls, wear boxers, not briefs


nope.... still can't win because then  Anne.Uumellmahaye would be offended.
 
2014-02-18 07:32:07 PM

the_vicious_fez: Context is important here. I don't see a lot of guys walking down the street in speedos and being that I don't live near a beach, if I did I'd be anywhere from vaguely amused to somewhat alarmed, depending on what else he had with him, his general mannerisms, the time of day, etc.


So is it O.K. for the neighbor lady to weed and mow the grass in a bikini?  Why not a guy in a speedo?

/there is one near me that does, damn near wrecked my car the one day.
 
2014-02-18 07:41:39 PM
She should do nothing and they should count themselves lucky there children are not dead
 
2014-02-18 07:52:59 PM

Egoy3k: the_vicious_fez: Egoy3k: the_vicious_fez: I was about 7 or 8 years old at a sleepover (all girls) and at some point that night my friend's dad wandered in to ask us to keep it down. He was in a shirt and a pair of obviously well-aged tighty whities. It was horrifying, and creepy as fark

Did he touch you? Did he ask you to touch him? Did he take photos of you? Did he expose himself to you? No?  Then the only person being anything was you being a drama queen.

It was a room full of 8 year old girls, it was late, it was dark, and he just gave off bad vibes constantly. I'm not saying it was flat out wrong, I'm just saying I, as an 8 year old who didn't know this guy well, was weirded out. My parents never walked around in their undies in my house. That's what bathrobes are for.

Before I respond I'd like to say that I was pretty harsh in my post and I regretted it after clicking add comment.

What i mean is that he probably got straight out of bed, threw on the shirt in concession to there being guests and told you to quiet down.  I'm not sure though, maybe he was a complete pedo but it seems to me that most of the creepy vibes people get about dads are because of the constant fear mongering in the media. As an uncle with a young niece I've gotten the looks and the double checks enough that I know exactly what some people think when they see a man and a child together and it disgusts me whenever time with my niece is ruined by idiots.

I was bringing my niece home from soccer practice once and my brother called me and asked me if I would take her for supper because he was late leaving work and wouldn't be home until after supper time.  Being the completely terrible role model that I am I took her to McDonald's.  So we got our meals and drove to a rest stop to eat.  The next thing I know I'm explaining to a police officer who I am and what I am doing with this girl while another officer is terrifying my niece and asking her questions.  Some busybody at the rest stop had ...


On the flip side, the only guy who ever made me sufficiently uncomfortable as a kid that I kept my distance turned out to be a legit pedophile who was molesting his step daughter and the foster kids. If it's the kid feeling weirded out and uncomfortable, you should listen to them.
 
2014-02-18 07:59:20 PM

MycroftHolmes: Egoy3k: MycroftHolmes: omeganuepsilon: Meh. I don't see any difference if it was later in the night. Get up annoyed at the squealing, yell at the kids, go back to bed.

Some people just don't care what other's see them in. Nothing creepy about that. Hell, on the random occasion someone walks in on me when I'm on the john, I laugh at their reactions(and give them hell the rest of the day as if I was offended, because ribbing people is fun!). I get dirty at work, I'm not ashamed to stop by the store and pick up milk or eggs on the way home. I get particularly filthy, and I strip down to boxers when I walk in the door. I don't flaunt my beer gut or anything, but it's just the thing to do because you don't want to get machine oil and grime on stuff because it never comes out of anything. Meh, whatever.

It may appear gross to an onlooker, but it is not innately creepy, it's utilitarian.

3pm though, everyone's gathered around the birthday cake waiting on the special girl to blow out the candles, that's a different story, and very creepy.

Of course, anything can be creepy with the wrong maneurisms or outright leering or something, but that's all also creepy fully clothed.

YOu really do not see the difference in how you approach an late teenage\early twenties male and how you approach a bunch of 8 and 9 year old girls?  You honestly think that going into a room full of 9 year old girls in your underwear is a acceptable.  Grab a robe, grab a blanket, only stick your head in, whatever.

So you must never go to the beach huh?

Yep, I do.  And I would find a guy in a speedo approaching a bunch of 8 year old girls a little questionable too.

And no, underwear!=swimsuits.  Swimsuits are meant to be outer wear, underwear is not.  There is both a functional difference in the garments, as well as a context.


I don't really see much difference. Doesn't matter what the intent of the garment is, skin is skin.

I don't want to see a fat hairy guy in boxers or tighty whities any more than I want to see him in swim trunks or a speedo which is not at all for either. I'm not going to be terribly offended by it though.
 
2014-02-18 07:59:47 PM
rynthetyn: On the flip side, the only guy who ever made me sufficiently uncomfortable as a kid that I kept my distance turned out to be a legit pedophile who was molesting his step daughter and the foster kids. If it's the kid feeling weirded out and uncomfortable, you should listen to them.

I can mostly agree with this. Kids are surprisingly good judges of character most of the time. They are also much more easily manipulated by adults and the media.  I agree with you that if a child feels uncomfortable you should be wary but they aren't infallible. Just like an unconcerned kid isn't a sign of complete trustworthiness either.
 
2014-02-18 08:03:53 PM

MycroftHolmes: Fano: Many, MANY guys don't own or would never wear a bathrobe. Hugh Hefner was known for always wearing his velour one. And anyhow, the arbitrary definition of "creepy" we seem  to be pushing close to "hang this person that I don't like because I project my issues onto him, which is good enough to begin speculating what awful things he must do, just because I was bitten by a retarded spider and got off kilter senses. Now excuse me while I drink this margarita this handsome charming fellow at the bar just brought me."

Every guy I know has a bathrobe, a pair of sweatpants, a pair of pajama bottoms, or a pair of gym shorts that can be slipped on very easily.  I know of no one that does not have a garment of some sort that could not be easily put on.


I have a pair of pajama pants but I'm not going to bother fishing them out to put them on in the middle of the night in my own house to tell someone to keep it down.

If the sight of me in a pair of boxers is that offensive, please don't come to my house. It's not like I'm sitting around the dinner table in my underwear. It's perfectly legal for a man to walk down the street in nothing but boxers. Trashy yes, but legal, even if children are present.
 
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