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(BBC)   Uncle Sam needs YOU to eat this invasive carp out of existence   (bbc.co.uk) divider line 98
    More: Interesting, Chicago, Uncle Sam, Asian carps, Asian, Southern United States  
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7329 clicks; posted to Main » on 18 Feb 2014 at 7:05 AM (36 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-02-18 08:38:14 AM  

mutterfark: doglover: mutterfark: Can't we just send in snakeheads to kill the Asian carp? Not sure where to find snakehead-eating gorillafish, but you know the rest.

[4.bp.blogspot.com image 458x454]

LOL, but will they die in winter? ;)


No. But they're 'murican so it should work itself out.
 
2014-02-18 08:46:21 AM  

bizzwire: How about the world's biggest ball of gefilte fish?

/or is that pike?


Fark that shiat.  That shiat is horrible.  First time I met the wife's grandparents was for Passover dinner.  Wanting to impress them, I ate some.  The amount of work it took to not spit it out was real.
 
2014-02-18 08:47:11 AM  
www.hiroshima-navi.or.jp

One thing's for sure: they can't win a championship.
 
2014-02-18 08:50:44 AM  

abhorrent1: No Time To Explain: but are they tasty?

Sure/ If you like the taste of mud and pollution.


Asian Carp are actually very low in mercury and very high in omega 3s. They are filter feeders, so they eat the phytoplankton of the lake and not the crap off the bottom.

Supposedly they taste pretty good, but I have never had one. If they get in the great lakes, though, the whole eastern lakeshore in Wisconsin will have huge economic disasters since they get a lot of their revenue from fishing.
 
2014-02-18 08:54:46 AM  
Where else can you find fertilizer that will load itself into the boat?
 
2014-02-18 08:57:13 AM  

gfid: darkjezter: /Carp are trash fish.

You know what else is considered garbage fish?

Catfish and who doesn't love some good catfish?

Rename it Asian Catfish, tell people it's endangered, but invasive so any protections it may have had is waived and people will fish it to extinction.


Lionfish in the Caribbean.is another invasive fish which is so out-of-place that the only way to control it would be to turn it into a food fad.


What's not to like? It's frilly and poisonous!


upload.wikimedia.org

 
2014-02-18 08:58:53 AM  
Granny's carp recipe:
*nail the carp to a hunk of rail-road tie
*pop into 500 F degree oven
*let cook for about seven hours
*remove from oven
*take fish off
*eat the rail-road tie
 
2014-02-18 09:00:30 AM  
So far, he is the only person in the whole of Chicago selling carp burgers.

My dyslexic friend tells me that they're available at McDonalds and Burger King, too.
 
2014-02-18 09:02:39 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-18 09:04:21 AM  

No Time To Explain: but are they tasty?

/never had, north of the border and thankfully/unfortunately those fish aren't in my area
//I would so love to go water ski net-fishing for these things


No . They are not .
 
2014-02-18 09:04:23 AM  

yakmans_dad: gfid: darkjezter: /Carp are trash fish.

You know what else is considered garbage fish?

Catfish and who doesn't love some good catfish?

Rename it Asian Catfish, tell people it's endangered, but invasive so any protections it may have had is waived and people will fish it to extinction.

Lionfish in the Caribbean.is another invasive fish which is so out-of-place that the only way to control it would be to turn it into a food fad.
What's not to like? It's frilly and poisonous!
[upload.wikimedia.org image 250x250]


-I've read a handful of articles from people who tried lionfish, and they all claimed it was quite tasty.  I'd give it a shot.  Butterfish, though...
 
2014-02-18 09:05:53 AM  
If humans won't eat it I'm sure cats will. And turn the remainder of the carcasses into bone meal. If the US can fish other species to the point of extinction I'm sure they can do it for this fish.
 
2014-02-18 09:11:39 AM  
It's best canned. No need to remove the bones when you can it. Most people will confuse it with salmon when it's served. Just remember it must be canned in a pressure cooker. Never can fish or meats in a water bath. Also to insure safety never larger then pint jars.
 
2014-02-18 09:14:29 AM  
Man... fark Chicago. You're a bunch of douchebags, and everybody that lives in SW Michigan pretty much hates you guys. You can't drive, your accent is annoying, you can't drive, you're douchebags, I hate how you drive on the highway, you're rude, and you're a bunch of self-important twats that drive like idiots. The only thing we enjoy about Chicago is the money you idiots bring to our local businesses, but that's only in the summer. Stop being a bunch of idiot-driving-self-important-rude-twat-douchebags, and get the canals blocked. fark your "cheap, efficient" lake shipping because, for once, I'd like someone down there to think of someone ELSE and say "HEY! WAITASECOND GUISE! Maybe we shouldn't be OK with the destruction of the ecosystem of 20% of the worlds fresh water when this douchefish invades it, and ruins a massive tourism based economy."  Yes, I'm sorry that it's going to have negative consequences for your city, but this is a lot more important than your cheap and efficient shipping. You know why "eat it out of existence" wasn't mentioned by the Army Corps of Engineers?

BECAUSE IT WON'T WORK.

/Douchebags
//You drive like douchebags
///fark you guys
 
2014-02-18 09:15:57 AM  
Carp = buglemouth bass
 
2014-02-18 09:17:47 AM  
Libs are missing an excellent opportunity to create jobs and save tax dollars. Hire the unemployed and teach them how to fish, clean and package these things. Cut back on the foodstamp payouts by supplying free fish.
People will feel good because they're working, the taker class will have no choice but to eat healthier and dems can use this in the 2014 elections. Because nobody is buying the, "don't look at the obamacare folly, it's all about global warming/cooling uh climate change" trick.
 
2014-02-18 09:19:16 AM  

Launch Code: Libs are missing an excellent opportunity to create jobs and save tax dollars. Hire the unemployed and teach them how to fish, clean and package these things. Cut back on the foodstamp payouts by supplying free fish.
People will feel good because they're working, the taker class will have no choice but to eat healthier and dems can use this in the 2014 elections. Because nobody is buying the, "don't look at the obamacare folly, it's all about global warming/cooling uh climate change" trick.


That was dumber than mine, dude. C'mon. You're better than me. Sack up.
 
2014-02-18 09:19:41 AM  

SomeoneDumb: I didn't think Americans ate much fish. I thought we were more slabs of dead cow people, with the occasional pig thrown in.


If it doesn't fly, and it doesn't move too fast, we eat it.  Unless it's a vegetable.
 
2014-02-18 09:21:51 AM  
Ikam

(I'm always surprised when I someone tells me they don't eat fish, and then I ask where they are from, and it is always some place like Iowa or Kansas).

West coast and Hawaii. Hate seafood.
 
2014-02-18 09:32:04 AM  

vudukungfu: Mr Fucik's carp burgers tasted like

I read that as Mr. Farkit's crap burgers.
Pass.


That's Mr DICK Farkit, if you please. Porn king and fish monger, but I repeat myself.
 
2014-02-18 09:48:45 AM  
Tell the Chinese that's it's an aphrodisiac. They'll be extinct in 5 years.
Problem solved.
 
2014-02-18 09:50:58 AM  

Nadie_AZ: ChrisDe: SomeoneDumb: I didn't think Americans ate much fish. I thought we were more slabs of dead cow people, with the occasional pig thrown in.

Americans eat a lot of everything.

Except bugs. And Asian carp. Apparently.


You eat more bugs than you know.....all grain food has bugs or bug parts or bug eggs in it....think about that when you eat your next bowl of cereal.
 
2014-02-18 09:53:03 AM  

Mr. Right: First, they're going to have to come up with a better name, a la the name change from Patagonian toothfish to Chilean Sea Bass.  If the chef can throw in a "wild caught" on the menu, those carp will be on the Endangered Species list in a month.


Lake Trout. It's the Baltimore way.
 
2014-02-18 09:56:03 AM  
Put these on boats to catch the carp when they jump:
upload.wikimedia.org
Have a few boats in a row....when the carp the first boats misses eats the chunks they get scooped up by the next boat....and so on....chop the farkers up.
 
2014-02-18 10:17:04 AM  
local environmental campaigner, Michael Beecham [...]: "I've gone down the river and had these fish jump up and hit me in the face. It is a big problem for our natural species," he said.


I wasn't aware that the native fish were able to feel sympathy for a human assaulted by the Asians.
 
2014-02-18 10:20:44 AM  

Mid_mo_mad_man: It's best canned. No need to remove the bones when you can it. Most people will confuse it with salmon when it's served. Just remember it must be canned in a pressure cooker. Never can fish or meats in a water bath. Also to insure safety never larger then pint jars.


Last food industry study I read indicated approx 40% of fish served is carp mislabled as something the consumer "likes".
Profit can solve this.
 
2014-02-18 10:42:35 AM  

phamwaa: IT'S CLOBBERIN' TIME!
[media.mlive.com image 840x519]



Turn the guy with the stick into John Belushi with a katana, and exchange the guy driving the boat with Buck Henry.

"Fresh From the River Samurai Sushi!"
 
2014-02-18 11:08:30 AM  
Anybody remember shmoos?
Fish that jump in the boat is getting pretty close.
 
2014-02-18 11:22:54 AM  
Carp are not in any way tastey. Like catfish they are best battered, highly seasoned, and fried. That can make anything palatable and there is a lot of useful protein and fat in carp.
 
2014-02-18 11:27:30 AM  

madgonad: Carp are not in any way tastey. Like catfish they are best battered, highly seasoned, and fried. That can make anything palatable and there is a lot of useful protein and fat in carp.


I suggest McDonald's be enlisted to make Carp McNuggets. We'd be out of carp in no time.
 
2014-02-18 11:29:11 AM  

mutterfark: Can't we just send in snakeheads to kill the Asian carp? Not sure where to find snakehead-eating gorillafish, but you know the rest.


Came for "Bart the Mother" reference. You know the rest.
 
2014-02-18 11:39:31 AM  
The government subsidizes the carp out of maize.

I've always thought it rediculous we subsidize unhealthy crap instead of healthier fruits veggies (if we must subsidize at all 'for green zones').

Take some of the unhealthy maize subsidy money and subsidise carp fishing instead.

Has to be healthier than maize... or the meat from animals it is fed to. I'm sure 'free' enterprise can then turn a cheap commodity into omething useful.
 
2014-02-18 12:03:06 PM  
Just introduce crocodiles to the river system during the summer months, problem solved.
 
2014-02-18 12:22:49 PM  
Cant we just put a bounty on them and grind them up into fertilizer if they taste nasty. I saw a bit on these fish on the travel cahnnel a bunch of boats headed down the river and since the fish jump when they get spooked, they just jumped into the boats.
 
2014-02-18 12:45:25 PM  
Top o' the food chain, ma!
 
2014-02-18 12:50:03 PM  
ts3.mm.bing.net
two words Dynamite Fishing.
 
2014-02-18 12:53:24 PM  
I wonder why no engineer has developed a boat with plexiglass shields and a bunch of nets around the edge of the boat to direct the fish into the nets as they jump out of the water.
 
2014-02-18 01:17:16 PM  
Why do poeple have to eat them?  Why not put them into a can of Friskys?

img.fark.net
 
2014-02-18 02:00:11 PM  
places4.assets.gotime.com
 
2014-02-18 03:17:11 PM  

groppet: Cant we just put a bounty on them and grind them up into fertilizer if they taste nasty. I saw a bit on these fish on the travel cahnnel a bunch of boats headed down the river and since the fish jump when they get spooked, they just jumped into the boats.


hmmmmm... easy business?  Rig up some nets on the front of boats, zip up and down the mississippi or whatever other waters these are in, and then go turn em into blood/bone meal.  Sounds like a pretty damn good idea to me.
 
2014-02-18 03:20:46 PM  

Witty Comment: everybody that lives in SW Michigan pretty much hates you guys


You'd just best watch your mouth, or else we'll go to the Indiana dunes on the weekends and then SW Michigan will go bankrupt.
 
2014-02-18 03:26:20 PM  

Launch Code: Libs are missing an excellent opportunity to create jobs and save tax dollars. Hire the unemployed and teach them how to fish, clean and package these things. Cut back on the foodstamp payouts by supplying free fish.
People will feel good because they're working, the taker class will have no choice but to eat healthier and dems can use this in the 2014 elections. Because nobody is buying the, "don't look at the obamacare folly, it's all about global warming/cooling uh climate change" trick.


It's a nice thought, but it's tough to put a hook on some phytoplankton bait.

Let's just tell the Tea Baggers that they're Mexican fish, and they'll be all over that.
 
2014-02-18 03:49:09 PM  
Perhaps Calumet Fisheries can find a way to make them tasty.
 
2014-02-18 05:07:56 PM  

ChrisDe: abhorrent1: No Time To Explain: but are they tasty?

Sure If you like the taste of mud and pollution.

You'd better stay away from the tilapia.


Nah. I only eat tilapia that raised in farms in crystal clear water high in the Alps by monks. Or that's just what they tell me and it's actually just perch caught in the polluted harbors along lake michigan. Either way..
 
2014-02-18 05:27:19 PM  
Chicago is not going to block up the canal. The fish are going to make it into the Great Lakes. Sorry, guys. It's going to happen. Figure out a plan B.

Even if Chicago did block up the canal, some jackass would catch some carp and release them into Lake Michigan anyway. Why? Just to be a jackass.
 
2014-02-18 08:33:16 PM  

Maud Dib: Tell the Chinese that's it's an aphrodisiac. They'll be extinct in 5 years.
Problem solved.


Glad this is covered. We may have to glue a giant horn on their foreheads though.
 
2014-02-18 09:04:16 PM  

morg: Maud Dib: Tell the Chinese that's it's an aphrodisiac. They'll be extinct in 5 years.
Problem solved.

Glad this is covered. We may have to glue a giant horn on their foreheads though.


Or tell 'em that's what makes black bear gall bladders magical and paws so tasty...
 
2014-02-19 07:05:50 AM  
We all know what vegans generally think of killing animals for their meat, but does anyone know what vegans think of eating meat from an animal that wasn't killed for its meat, in this case, because it was an invasive species?
 
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