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(TMZ)   TV pastor bitten by venomous snake. This is not a repeat from Genesis   (tmz.com) divider line 111
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2986 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 16 Feb 2014 at 12:52 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



111 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-02-16 12:01:49 PM  
Christ, what an idiot.
 
2014-02-16 12:14:16 PM  
Didn't I see this on an episode of Justified?  Didn't work out well for that guy, either.

/wants to be Raylan Givens when I grow up
 
2014-02-16 12:15:21 PM  
the Bible says a poisonous snakebite will not harm them as long as they are anointed by God's power.

Everyone who has been anointed by God's power take one step forward not so fast Pastor.
 
2014-02-16 12:20:05 PM  
I never worry when I'm bitten by a poisonous snake, unless said snake is also venomous.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2014-02-16 12:21:16 PM  
He must have had an impure thought.
 
2014-02-16 12:26:22 PM  
He may not have believed in evilution, but evilution believed in him.
 
2014-02-16 12:38:01 PM  
*snicker*

show me: Christ, what an idiot.

 
2014-02-16 01:00:02 PM  
www.trilobite.org
 
2014-02-16 01:00:37 PM  
So, now that it is clear that (a) being anointed by God does not stop you from dying if a snake bites you or (b) that this guy was not anointed by God, what do the people who were following him do? Either he was completely incorrect, or a false prophet.  Neither is good, so what do they do and where do they go?
 
2014-02-16 01:01:32 PM  

swaniefrmreddeer: He may not have believed in evilution, but evilution believed in him.


Too late, he's already procreated. But his son may follow in his footsteps.
 
2014-02-16 01:01:42 PM  
And The Lord said, "TLC reality shows are blessed in my eyes, but appeareth not on the Nat Geo Channel, for it is an abomination."
2 TVGuide 8:13-14
 
2014-02-16 01:02:00 PM  
Dead.

And no, they don't pray to the snakes.
 
2014-02-16 01:02:44 PM  
So the hubris of thinking God would make you immune to the rules of the universe if you run a sincere enough fan club caught up with him. Eh.
 
2014-02-16 01:03:05 PM  

Gecko Gingrich: I never worry when I'm bitten by a poisonous snake, unless said snake is also venomous.


crow202.org
 
2014-02-16 01:03:33 PM  
"Sometimes, they make it too damn easy for me."
www.macroevolution.net
 
2014-02-16 01:04:11 PM  
fark with the bull you get the horns . . . Or something like that
 
2014-02-16 01:04:30 PM  
2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-02-16 01:05:07 PM  
Stupid should hurt, and really, really stupid should really really hurt.
 
2014-02-16 01:05:39 PM  
Well, I guess he...

*Puts on sunglasses*

Wasn't too charming.

YEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHH!!!
 
2014-02-16 01:06:06 PM  
I vas drivink my car once and vas bitten by a vindshield viper.
 
2014-02-16 01:07:34 PM  
2.bp.blogspot.com
HA HAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
 
2014-02-16 01:12:33 PM  
media.moddb.com
 
2014-02-16 01:13:59 PM  
Seen in the vicinity.
www.chocolateboxwriters.com
 
2014-02-16 01:16:55 PM  
Gotcha

i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-16 01:17:06 PM  
And I'm sure his congregation will be on the doorstep of the church again next Sunday repeating cycle of stupidity.
 
2014-02-16 01:20:23 PM  

RodneyToady: And The Lord said, "TLC reality shows are blessed in my eyes, but appeareth not on the Nat Geo Channel, for it is an abomination."
2 TVGuide 8:13-14


7:13-14 Central
 
2014-02-16 01:27:41 PM  
I'm sorry he's dead, I guess. I'm more sorry that no one in his congregation will learn anything from this.
 
2014-02-16 01:28:06 PM  

Barfmaker: the Bible says a poisonous snakebite will not harm them as long as they are anointed by God's power.

Everyone who has been anointed by God's power take one step forward not so fast Pastor.


Clearly he's in hell now.  Satan is sticking him in the ass with his pitchfork.

/ "pitchfork" is a euphemism for "penis"
 
2014-02-16 01:28:30 PM  
Jerk Jesus for the win.

"Yeah Dude, fondle that serpent. It's totally safe."
 
2014-02-16 01:29:46 PM  
Well, bye.
 
2014-02-16 01:31:08 PM  
"A funny thing to do is, if you're out hiking and your friend gets bitten by a poisonous snake, tell him you're going to go for help, then go about ten feet and pretend that *you* got bit by a snake. Then start an argument with him about who's going to go get help. A lot of guys will start crying. That's why it makes you feel good when you tell them it was just a joke." - Jack Handey
 
2014-02-16 01:31:15 PM  
Then, verily, did I send Steve Irwin as a warning unto you, and you did not heed my message.
img.fark.net
 
2014-02-16 01:33:13 PM  
What a nut.

Now if you will excuse me, I am going to drink some strychnine from a Mason jar.
 
2014-02-16 01:34:04 PM  
Didn't we have this exact same situation like 2 weeks ago?

At this pace maybe they'll go extinct.

/who am I kidding? As long as there's money to be made we'll always have snake charming preachers.
 
2014-02-16 01:38:25 PM  

cygnusx13: /who am I kidding? As long as there's money to be made we'll always have snake charming preachers.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZna1zkWUF8
 
2014-02-16 01:40:01 PM  
Not that any of you will find this surprising, but snake handling is indeed a uniquely American form of Christianity:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snake_handling
 
2014-02-16 01:42:10 PM  

contrapunctus: Not that any of you will find this surprising, but snake handling is indeed a uniquely American form of Christianity:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snake_handling


I've been under the impression that Fark was the center of snake handling as a religion

/if you know what I mean
 
2014-02-16 01:48:37 PM  
Unless he died from eating the snake or rubbing it on his skin, the snake isn't "poisonous", it's venomous.
 
2014-02-16 01:48:53 PM  

styckx: And I'm sure his congregation will be on the doorstep of the church again next Sunday repeating cycle of stupidity.


He was SO holy that Jesus rewarded him by taking him to heaven! Pass the strychnine.
 
2014-02-16 01:50:18 PM  
If only....
ivarfjeld.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-02-16 01:52:06 PM  
Whew! Thank god, nothing of value was lost.
 
2014-02-16 01:54:58 PM  

BunkyBrewman: Didn't I see this on an episode of Justified?  Didn't work out well for that guy, either.

/wants to be Raylan Givens when I grow up


I want to DO Raylan Givens.
 
2014-02-16 01:56:37 PM  

show me: Christ, what an idiot.


Jesus, what a laugh. Practically a miracle, if miracles were utterly predictable outcomes of stupid behaviours instead of "magic to a retard".
 
2014-02-16 01:57:13 PM  
Damn, guys, there's some comedy gold in this thread.

I haven't laughed this hard all week.
 
2014-02-16 01:59:53 PM  
I'm not excusing ignorance by any means here, but I think it's important to keep in mind where these types of churches are located.  Parts of Appalachia redefine the word 'poverty'.  There are are backwood areas of this country that are damn near indistinguishable from 1890.

There are a few documentaries on YouTube about the snake handling churches, and the areas they're located in.  It's really no different from inner city dysfunction; once a way of life becomes normalized, the cycle starts and it's hard to break out of.

If you haven't seen this yet, I highly suggest watching it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9wyOJ4di0g
 
2014-02-16 02:03:09 PM  

Bslim: Whew! Thank god, nothing of value was lost.


That poor snake will be put down because of the retard. We could have made antivenom, given educational lessons, performed research on the snake, so yea buddy, we lost something important.

Hate it when arseholes cost the life of an animal that was doing nothing more than what it is supposed to do.
 
2014-02-16 02:03:39 PM  
Humanity simultaneusly rid itself of a reality tv scumbag/religious parasite. There just might be a god.
 
2014-02-16 02:08:52 PM  
community.us.playstation.com
 
2014-02-16 02:09:49 PM  
If Adam & Eve were both white, where did black people come from?

i0.kym-cdn.com
 
2014-02-16 02:12:10 PM  
In the words of natural born killers : "Look, B**ch, you knew i was a snake"
 
2014-02-16 02:19:33 PM  

serpent_sky: So, now that it is clear that (a) being anointed by God does not stop you from dying if a snake bites you or (b) that this guy was not anointed by God, what do the people who were following him do? Either he was completely incorrect, or a false prophet.  Neither is good, so what do they do and where do they go?


thechive.files.wordpress.com

If you drink the Kool-Aid, I can't help you nor is it in my interest or the interest of our shared species to do so. Buh-bye.
 
2014-02-16 02:27:30 PM  

Valiente: If you drink the Kool-Aid, I can't help you nor is it in my interest or the interest of our shared species to do so. Buh-bye.


I'm honestly just curious. Being that I am not into snake handling, or religion, and have a basic enough understanding of science and how snake venom works, I'm not a likely candidate for following someone like him. I'm just wondering what happens to the people who follow someone like this - either everything they believe(d) is/was wrong, or the person they followed was wrong.

In fairness to the people who "drank the Kool-Aid" were manipulated by someone who (while stupid) had the charisma to make them believe in this stuff, and in him.  You have to feel bad for them.
 
2014-02-16 02:30:17 PM  

serpent_sky: So, now that it is clear that (a) being anointed by God does not stop you from dying if a snake bites you or (b) that this guy was not anointed by God, what do the people who were following him do? Either he was completely incorrect, or a false prophet.  Neither is good, so what do they do and where do they go?



They'll use the same cop-out answer that allows this man to remain anointed by God and the philosophy of their sect to remain intact... "It was God's plan"
 
2014-02-16 02:36:13 PM  
blog.chron.com
 
2014-02-16 02:36:34 PM  

OOBE Juan Kenobi: If Adam & Eve were both white, where did black people come from?

[i0.kym-cdn.com image 400x400]


Nod.
 
2014-02-16 02:36:58 PM  
First of all, the name is "Plissken".
And no one has ever put a Genesis CD on repeat.
 
2014-02-16 02:40:21 PM  

RodneyToady: And The Lord said, "TLC reality shows are blessed in my eyes, but appeareth not on the Nat Geo Channel, for it is an abomination."
2 TVGuide 8:13-14


Thankfully, I switched to an easy-care mechanical keyboard this year...because I have to clean hot cocoa out of it now.
 
2014-02-16 02:40:58 PM  

OOBE Juan Kenobi: If Adam & Eve were both white, where did black people come from?

Tower of Babel. Any fundie segregationist will tell you.

 
2014-02-16 02:54:06 PM  
FTFA: The show's website explains the Pastor and his followers believe the Bible says a poisonous snakebite will not harm them as long as they are anointed by God's power.

So, if you are a member of this church, how can you see this death and not see it as incontrovertible evidence that god's power is a myth???
 
2014-02-16 02:57:41 PM  

Farking Canuck: FTFA: The show's website explains the Pastor and his followers believe the Bible says a poisonous snakebite will not harm them as long as they are anointed by God's power.

So, if you are a member of this church, how can you see this death and not see it as incontrovertible evidence that god's power is a myth???


He was a sinful sinner who lost the blessing of God because of his sinful ways. If he had been more devout this wouldn't have happened. He was a bad man and God smote him down.
 
mhd
2014-02-16 02:58:54 PM  
Obviously the snake had to many hit dice to be controlled by the Snake Charm spell.
 
2014-02-16 03:00:42 PM  
Matthew 4:7 biatches
 
2014-02-16 03:04:07 PM  

MechaPyx: Farking Canuck: FTFA: The show's website explains the Pastor and his followers believe the Bible says a poisonous snakebite will not harm them as long as they are anointed by God's power.

So, if you are a member of this church, how can you see this death and not see it as incontrovertible evidence that god's power is a myth???

He was a sinful sinner who lost the blessing of God because of his sinful ways. If he had been more devout this wouldn't have happened. He was a bad man and God smote him down.


Smitten with smut, smarmy minister smote. Smart.
 
2014-02-16 03:10:02 PM  
"I was born a snake handler, and I'll die a snake handler."

i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-16 03:13:24 PM  

contrapunctus: Not that any of you will find this surprising, but snake handling is indeed a uniquely American form of Christianity:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Snake_handling


So is Mormonism, but at least their religious practices don't have the byproduct of torturing and killing innocent snakes.

/sucks for this guy's family, but dollars to donuts says they'll keep on practicing snake handling "in his memory"
 
2014-02-16 03:22:07 PM  

AeAe: Barfmaker: the Bible says a poisonous snakebite will not harm them as long as they are anointed by God's power.

Everyone who has been anointed by God's power take one step forward not so fast Pastor.

Clearly he's in hell now.  Satan is sticking him in the ass with his pitchfork.

/ "pitchfork" is a euphemism for "penis"

Valiente: serpent_sky: So, now that it is clear that (a) being anointed by God does not stop you from dying if a snake bites you or (b) that this guy was not anointed by God, what do the people who were following him do? Either he was completely incorrect, or a false prophet.  Neither is good, so what do they do and where do they go?

[G.A.F.-O-Meter image 400x310]

If you drink the Kool-Aid, I can't help you nor is it in my interest or the interest of our shared species to do so. Buh-bye.

Actually, the Bible says no such thing about that promise being limited to the anointed of God. What it says (direct from the mouth of the Resurrected Lord Jesus Christ Himself, 100% red ink in a Red Letter Edition) is that among the signs that shall follow them that believe is that they shall take up serpents without harm, and that if they drink any deadly thing, it shall not hurt them (Mark 16:17-18). It wasn't just limited to those who were anointed.

Those who aren't KJV Onlyists have an "out" here: the last ½ of the last chapter of The Gospel According to Saint Mark is widely acknowledged by scholars to have been added on by someone else, not written by Mark (the Koine Greek language style changes abruptly and drastically). The actual end of the Gospel of Mark is rather abrupt, ending at Mark 16:8 with the women not reporting the Resurrection to the Apostles as the angel commanded them because they were afraid, so apparently there was more in the original but it has long since been lost. The oldest extant manuscripts lack anything after that. Others add a short ending which basically goes, "But they reported briefly to Peter and those with him all that they had been told. And after this, Jesus himself sent out by means of them, from east to west, the sacred and imperishable proclamation of eternal salvation." The longer ending can't be found in any source older than the second century BCE.

KJV Onlyists (and especially Ruckmanites) can't use this excuse, though.


limeyfellow: Bslim: Whew! Thank god, nothing of value was lost.

That poor snake will be put down because of the retard. We could have made antivenom, given educational lessons, performed research on the snake, so yea buddy, we lost something important.

Hate it when arseholes cost the life of an animal that was doing nothing more than what it is supposed to do.

Like Mary the elephant in last night's thread?
 
2014-02-16 03:24:03 PM  

OOBE Juan Kenobi: If Adam & Eve were both white, where did black people come from?

[i0.kym-cdn.com image 400x400]


Noah's bastard son Ham.

/That's what they really believe. The subtext is that he was cursed, if you know what I mean.
 
2014-02-16 03:25:17 PM  
My aunt in Monroe, Louisiana, decided to go off her Parkinson's meds bc some kooky preacher punched her forehead, told her she didn't need them anymore.  Now she's paralyzed for a month at least.
 
2014-02-16 03:33:21 PM  

serpent_sky: Valiente: If you drink the Kool-Aid, I can't help you nor is it in my interest or the interest of our shared species to do so. Buh-bye.

I'm honestly just curious. Being that I am not into snake handling, or religion, and have a basic enough understanding of science and how snake venom works, I'm not a likely candidate for following someone like him. I'm just wondering what happens to the people who follow someone like this - either everything they believe(d) is/was wrong, or the person they followed was wrong.

In fairness to the people who "drank the Kool-Aid" were manipulated by someone who (while stupid) had the charisma to make them believe in this stuff, and in him.  You have to feel bad for them.


While in some senses, we are just big old meat robots, I do subscribe to the notion of free will. If you, of your own free will, subscribe to belief systems clearly involving the surrendering of that free will, or critical reasoning or discernment, if you prefer, to authority figures in a system based on magical fables, no...I don't feel bad for their outcome.

I feel badly for their children who don't get a choice about being born to credulous dupes. I honestly feel that the more credulous dupes who are forced to experience some shadowy enlightenment about their assumptions, the better. Like, for instance, the Phelps clan's apostates. Good for them.

If credulous dupes do not wise up, then I wish them a Waco and good night.
 
2014-02-16 03:35:08 PM  

saymayne: My aunt in Monroe, Louisiana, decided to go off her Parkinson's meds bc some kooky preacher punched her forehead, told her she didn't need them anymore.  Now she's paralyzed for a month at least.


And is her faith still like a rock? Dumb?
 
2014-02-16 03:43:15 PM  

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: OOBE Juan Kenobi: If Adam & Eve were both white, where did black people come from?

Tower of Babel. Any fundie segregationist will tell you.


So did white people walk in, and then walk out Chinese, or was God still pimping Adam for cloning purposes?
 
2014-02-16 03:45:16 PM  
How is this any different than Dale Earnhart dying in a NASCAR race, snowboarders being killed in an avalanche, a police officer dying in the line of duty or Sonny Bono crashing into a tree?  They all died doing something they believed in and/or they enjoyed.
 
2014-02-16 03:53:50 PM  

Hollie Maea: OOBE Juan Kenobi: If Adam & Eve were both white, where did black people come from?

[i0.kym-cdn.com image 400x400]

Noah's bastard son Ham.

/That's what they really believe. The subtext is that he was cursed, if you know what I mean.


So Ham sodomizes Noah for getting drunk, Canaan gets cursed for no reason, and out pops Eskimos, blacks, Asians & Mexicans. Looks like a great setup for a sequel to 'Noah'. Hopefully Darren Aronofsky will be directing.
 
2014-02-16 04:18:31 PM  

contrapunctus: I'm not excusing ignorance by any means here, but I think it's important to keep in mind where these types of churches are located. Parts of Appalachia redefine the word 'poverty'. There are are backwood areas of this country that are damn near indistinguishable from 1890.


Lol I live in southeast Kentucky in a town with at least one snake handling church. The normal people around here know not to pick up farking snakes and they know to go to a hospital if they do get bitten by a snake.
 
2014-02-16 04:25:22 PM  
Thanks, gay marriage.
 
2014-02-16 04:25:37 PM  

contrapunctus: I'm not excusing ignorance by any means here, but I think it's important to keep in mind where these types of churches are located.  Parts of Appalachia redefine the word 'poverty'.  There are are backwood areas of this country that are damn near indistinguishable from 1890.

There are a few documentaries on YouTube about the snake handling churches, and the areas they're located in.  It's really no different from inner city dysfunction; once a way of life becomes normalized, the cycle starts and it's hard to break out of.

If you haven't seen this yet, I highly suggest watching it:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z9wyOJ4di0g


I've got a lot more respect for the snake-handlers than the money-grubber megachurch people.
 
2014-02-16 05:07:04 PM  
Apparently he wasn't "anointed by god."
Or, that whole religious thing is just bullshiat.
All of the above? + he's just a dumbass.
 
2014-02-16 05:09:25 PM  
So, he's Hisssssssssssssssssssstory
 
2014-02-16 05:23:39 PM  
Sooooo...what happened to the snake?
 
2014-02-16 05:24:57 PM  

AbuHashish: So, he's Hisssssssssssssssssssstory


The whole congregation is rattled.
 
2014-02-16 05:42:20 PM  

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: Dead.

And no, they don't pray to the snakes.


I'm glad someone other than me caught that. FAIL tag gets shared by the journalist.
 
2014-02-16 05:47:05 PM  

serpent_sky: So, now that it is clear that (a) being anointed by God does not stop you from dying if a snake bites you or (b) that this guy was not anointed by God, what do the people who were following him do? Either he was completely incorrect, or a false prophet.  Neither is good, so what do they do and where do they go?


You forgot:

(c) God is testing their faith, in which case they need to continue in the same direction.
 
2014-02-16 05:52:10 PM  

digistil: serpent_sky: So, now that it is clear that (a) being anointed by God does not stop you from dying if a snake bites you or (b) that this guy was not anointed by God, what do the people who were following him do? Either he was completely incorrect, or a false prophet.  Neither is good, so what do they do and where do they go?

You forgot:

(c) God is testing their faith, in which case they need to continue in the same direction.


Good answer, Good answer!
fontanalib.files.wordpress.com
Survey says!
img.fark.net
 
2014-02-16 06:03:47 PM  

OOBE Juan Kenobi: Hollie Maea: OOBE Juan Kenobi: If Adam & Eve were both white, where did black people come from?

[i0.kym-cdn.com image 400x400]

Noah's bastard son Ham.

/That's what they really believe. The subtext is that he was cursed, if you know what I mean.

So Ham sodomizes Noah for getting drunk, Canaan gets cursed for no reason, and out pops Eskimos, blacks, Asians & Mexicans. Looks like a great setup for a sequel to 'Noah'. Hopefully Darren Aronofsky will be directing.


Nope, just blacks.  When they wrote the bible, the only people they could think of were middle easterners, Greeks, and northern Africans.
 
2014-02-16 06:18:23 PM  

ZAZ: He must have had an impure thought.


He would have to have a thought first.

Evidence is minimal
 
2014-02-16 06:20:19 PM  

Lee451: How is this any different than Dale Earnhart dying in a NASCAR race, snowboarders being killed in an avalanche, a police officer dying in the line of duty or Sonny Bono crashing into a tree?  They all died doing something they believed in and/or they enjoyed.


Presumably, the people in your examples were aware of the risks of what they were doing and chose to accept those risks.  These snake handlers don't believe they are at risk.
 
2014-02-16 07:00:14 PM  

Valiente: AbuHashish: So, he's Hisssssssssssssssssssstory

The whole congregation is rattled.


Reality bites.
 
2014-02-16 07:02:27 PM  

Hollie Maea: OOBE Juan Kenobi: Hollie Maea: OOBE Juan Kenobi: If Adam & Eve were both white, where did black people come from?

[i0.kym-cdn.com image 400x400]

Noah's bastard son Ham.

/That's what they really believe. The subtext is that he was cursed, if you know what I mean.

So Ham sodomizes Noah for getting drunk, Canaan gets cursed for no reason, and out pops Eskimos, blacks, Asians & Mexicans. Looks like a great setup for a sequel to 'Noah'. Hopefully Darren Aronofsky will be directing.

Nope, just blacks.  When they wrote the bible, the only people they could think of were middle easterners, Greeks, and northern Africans.


I thought the Russians wrote the bible. This isn't making much sense...

trinities.org
 
2014-02-16 07:24:22 PM  

buckler: Unless he died from eating the snake or rubbing it on his skin, the snake isn't "poisonous", it's venomous.


img.fark.net
Begs to differ.
 
2014-02-16 07:45:36 PM  
25.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-02-16 07:58:50 PM  
I'm itching to know how the Holy Church of Handling Venomous Serpents will spin this one. Was the pastor sliding into sin and lost his belief? Was he struck down by Satan? Was he lured from the path of righteousness by all those big National Geographic $$$? I can't wait for Season Three!
 
2014-02-16 08:20:34 PM  
Poor snake.  Probably had a bad taste in it's mouth the rest of the day....
 
2014-02-16 08:27:48 PM  
Can we start giving guns to ducks now?
 
2014-02-16 08:43:59 PM  
The spin will be two-fold. A) God is testing the faith of the parishioners , and B) God wanted to reward the pastor so he called him to heaven.
 
2014-02-16 08:48:42 PM  

Steve Zodiac: The spin will be two-fold. A) God is testing the faith of the parishioners , and B) God wanted to reward the pastor so he called him to heaven.


IT'S A WIN WIN!
 
2014-02-16 09:36:12 PM  

Unscratchable_Itch: Steve Zodiac: The spin will be two-fold. A) God is testing the faith of the parishioners , and B) God wanted to reward the pastor so he called him to heaven.

IT'S A WIN WIN!


Just once I wish that being called to heaven didn't involve run of the mill dying.  The person dies, a thunderous voice is heard announcing " Well done my faithful servant", and then a beam of light, of an indescribable color shines on the person who rises, smiles to those around him, and then melds with the light and disappears. All of which IS captured on the many cameras, including Nat Geo's and any cell phone cameras around. THINK what that type of display would do to boost the already faithful and also how it would convert the lost souls following false religions?
 
2014-02-16 09:50:22 PM  
Don't mourn for him.  Obviously his faith wasn't strong enough.  That's why he was bitten, and that's why he died.
 
2014-02-16 10:24:00 PM  

Lee451: How is this any different than Dale Earnhart dying in a NASCAR race, snowboarders being killed in an avalanche, a police officer dying in the line of duty or Sonny Bono crashing into a tree?  They all died doing something they believed in and/or they enjoyed.


Let us know when Dale Earnhart ever stopped using a helmet, crash harness, and other safety gear because he decided to pray instead.
 
2014-02-16 11:23:46 PM  
Snakes are not poisonous. Snakes are venomous.
 
2014-02-16 11:34:05 PM  
This helps explain why those of us up North shake our heads and chuckle at Southerners.
 
2014-02-17 12:43:43 AM  

nharrisphoto: Seen in the vicinity.


Thank you! That was a awesome scene
 
2014-02-17 01:14:32 AM  
"Sorry to interrupt this discussion, but has anyone seen my snake?"

secularright.org
 
2014-02-17 01:53:56 AM  

TerminalEchoes: Snakes are not poisonous. Snakes are venomous.


I always wondered about this. If I ate a rattlesnake's venom glands, would I be poisoned, envenomated, or neither?
 
2014-02-17 01:55:03 AM  
Why the hell is this on Nat Geo?

First of all, snakes are venomous, not poisonous. Goddamn idiot journalists.

Second of all, snake handling churches will mistreat their animals. There was a story recently on fark about this.

The euthanized snakes were "highly suspected of being infected with the same pathogens that have proven fatal for the other 39 snakes brought to us ... this is due to the overcrowded conditions they were being kept in, prior to their arrival at Knoxville Zoo," the zoo's Michael Ogle said.

 Yeah, okay they're diamondbacks and so on but the animals do not deserve this treatment and frankly someone dying of this practice feels like karma.

/poor critters
 
2014-02-17 02:00:56 AM  
Same guy was bitten previously and let his finger literally rot off. Nutball fanatic.
 
2014-02-17 05:18:08 AM  

TerminalEchoes: Snakes are not poisonous. Snakes are venomous.


We know. And we really don't care.
 
2014-02-17 09:48:59 AM  

Gyrfalcon: And we really don't care.


Speak for yourself.
 
2014-02-17 10:05:29 AM  
There's a biblical lesson in this.  Do not put the LORD to the test.
 
2014-02-17 10:39:42 AM  

gnosis301: There's a biblical lesson in this.  Do not put the LORD to the test.


Exactly. Magic is not real and you will die.

Actually. I've changed my mind. if you feel magic is real, put your life at risk and have faith that magic will save you.
 
2014-02-17 10:17:31 PM  
The Lord works in mysterious ways....Darwinism on the other hand is pretty direct.
img.fark.net
 
2014-02-18 12:10:27 AM  
When you're getting bitten by a snake that can kill you with whatever liquid is in it's body, whether the snake is 'poisonous' or 'venomous' is pretty much irrelevant.

But have fun, you snake aficionados.
 
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