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(Tampa Bay Online)   Military nears holy grail: Pizza that lasts years   (tbo.com) divider line 49
    More: Cool, MREs, Engineering Center, food science, force multipliers  
•       •       •

3216 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Feb 2014 at 1:44 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



49 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-02-14 08:51:11 AM  
What's cool is that the soldiers' bodies won't decompose when they die.
 
2014-02-14 09:58:14 AM  
It already does that, just check the back of my fridge
 
2014-02-14 10:28:48 AM  
Well that sounds... delicious
 
2014-02-14 12:19:22 PM  
I thought Little Caesars did that years ago.
 
2014-02-14 12:47:56 PM  
"It pretty much tastes just like a typical pan pizza that you would make at home and take out of the oven or the toaster oven," she said.

Great- all soldiers need is to be distracted by pizza arguing on the battlefield.
 
2014-02-14 01:04:11 PM  
And, MOMs!
You can reuse the cardboard box to have your kid shipped back home!

Be the first one on your block!
 
2014-02-14 01:31:43 PM  

OregonVet: "It pretty much tastes just like a typical pan pizza that you would make at home and take out of the oven or the toaster oven," she said.

Great- all soldiers need is to be distracted by pizza arguing on the battlefield.


Who the hell is gonna have room in their pack for a full slice of New York style ketchup-cardboard?
 
2014-02-14 01:47:05 PM  

Saborlas: OregonVet: "It pretty much tastes just like a typical pan pizza that you would make at home and take out of the oven or the toaster oven," she said.

Great- all soldiers need is to be distracted by pizza arguing on the battlefield.

Who the hell is gonna have room in their pack for a full slice of New York style ketchup-cardboard?


Who the hell is gonna have room for a slice (chunk?) of Chicago-style bread, sauce and cheese casserole ?
 
2014-02-14 01:48:59 PM  
Eh, I suppose it couldn't be worse than the vegetarian omelet MRE though it looks like it would be pretty close.
 
2014-02-14 01:49:12 PM  

markfara: What's cool is that the soldiers' bodies won't decompose when they die.


They will rise up and crave brains.

api.ning.com
 
2014-02-14 01:51:38 PM  
But... who NEEDS a pizza to last years? I mean, it's never around for that long.
 
2014-02-14 01:51:53 PM  
Notice it's not 4 inches thick like that shiat from Chicago.

THANKS OBAMA
 
2014-02-14 01:56:30 PM  
Pffffft. McDonalds has been doing this for years.
 
2014-02-14 01:57:47 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-14 01:58:48 PM  
They crossed a Twinkie with a pizza?
 
2014-02-14 01:59:08 PM  
siliconangle.com
 
2014-02-14 01:59:24 PM  

Saborlas: OregonVet: "It pretty much tastes just like a typical pan pizza that you would make at home and take out of the oven or the toaster oven," she said.

Great- all soldiers need is to be distracted by pizza arguing on the battlefield.

Who the hell is gonna have room in their pack for a full slice of New York style ketchup-cardboard?


They'll lose the will to fight, if that's what they're going to get.  Of course, they could "allow" the enemy to capture that shiat, but, that might be considered a war crime. They would be begging for a drone strike.
 
2014-02-14 02:01:40 PM  
images.huffingtonpost.com
 
2014-02-14 02:07:13 PM  
I'll stick with humectant free pizza.
 
2014-02-14 02:09:19 PM  
I thouht the holy grail would be a all inclusive food with a perfect balance of everything you need to lead a healthy life, but looks feels and tastes just like bacon.
 
2014-02-14 02:14:11 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: I thought Little Caesars did that years ago.


Came to say this. Seriously.
 
2014-02-14 02:24:25 PM  

sjmcc13: I thouht the holy grail would be a all inclusive food with a perfect balance of everything you need to lead a healthy life, but looks feels and tastes just like bacon.


Some day.  Some day.
 
2014-02-14 02:42:28 PM  
They have figured out to weaponize pizza!!
 
2014-02-14 03:08:37 PM  
Won't last too long once this guys finds it:

whyareyousofat.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-02-14 03:13:37 PM  
Will it cause "a flatulence symphony in my tent all night"? http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/crime/meals-ready-excrete
 
2014-02-14 03:15:27 PM  

FirstNationalBastard: I thought Little Caesars did that years ago.


Get out of my head
 
2014-02-14 03:26:40 PM  

Madaynun: They crossed a Twinkie with a pizza?


Came here to say "Stolen Hostess Tech", glad to see Ur poost
 
2014-02-14 03:37:36 PM  
Yay chemicals!!!


Don't they also add some nice 'spices' into their MREs to stop you up, and to keep your little friend down?

You can keep better guard when you arent crappin or jackin
 
2014-02-14 03:43:13 PM  
When that hits the open market, college breakfast will never be the same. Well, *taste* the same.
 
2014-02-14 03:45:58 PM  
They used dominos top secret cardboard crust?
 
2014-02-14 04:08:13 PM  
Any bachelor will tell you that the 3 year old slice found under the cushions is edible too.
 
2014-02-14 04:15:46 PM  

Slypork: Any bachelor will tell you that the 3 year old slice found under the cushions is edible too.


As a bachelor, I'm calling this one bullshiat.  Anyone knows you can't dry age pizza under cushions, it has to be in the open air.
 
2014-02-14 04:19:16 PM  

toraque: Slypork: Any bachelor will tell you that the 3 year old slice found under the cushions is edible too.

As a bachelor, I'm calling this one bullshiat.  Anyone knows you can't dry age pizza under cushions, it has to be in the open air.


Sprinkle some of last night's beer on it (make sure you grabbed the can without the cigarette butts), nuke it for a couple seconds and you've got a hell of a breakfast.
 
2014-02-14 04:25:22 PM  
We had to fit three MRE'S in our MOLLE along with other requisite items before deployment, if the pizza goes in there, then, yeah you can carry an eternal pizza along with 90 pounds of other shiat.
 
2014-02-14 04:46:45 PM  
Hey look, the pizza is slightly larger than the desiccant package.
 
2014-02-14 05:35:39 PM  
I predict fratricide between soldiers from Chicago and soldiers from New York.
 
2014-02-14 05:49:58 PM  
Dan Nattress, agreed the pizza deserves a thumbs up. "It tastes pretty much what you would get from a pizza parlor," he said.


Obviously has never eaten sober at a "pizza parlor".
 
2014-02-14 06:25:50 PM  

SpaceBison: Eh, I suppose it couldn't be worse than the vegetarian omelet MRE though it looks like it would be pretty close.


You should have tried the Canadian version of that. It had peas in it and eventually turned the whole thing green. Absolutely horrendous.
 
2014-02-14 06:59:22 PM  
"It tastes pretty much what you would get from a pizza parlor an elementary-school cafeteria," he said.

FTFH
 
2014-02-14 07:41:07 PM  
C-rats, while somewhat awkward to carry were usually edible.
On a plus side, if you had the time and wanted to heat them a pot/helmet of hot water would do the trick.
You could also use the hot water for your coffee or hot chocolate.
Or you could use the little paraffin pellet butterfly stove to heat the can's.

Enter the MRE. When we were first issued the original types of MRE's we knew we were in trouble. They came in a shiat brown bag.

Unlike the C-rats, to heat the first generation MRE's you used the hot water pot, but because of the protective coatings on the packages, you had to throw that water out and boil some more for the hot drinks. I understand that there is a small heater available now that forgoes the use of water,

The original MRE's serving portions were such that it usually took 2 packs to fill you up. The later generations have bigger servings.

C-rats had what was basically a hard tack type bread or cracker that tasted reasonably good and would survive most anything.
MRE's tried using regular saltine's which died the first time your ruck took any kind of jolt.
The freeze dried fruit was ....different.

The common consensus formed by my unit concerning the first generation MRE's?

What's the difference between an MRE and starving to death?
Starving doesn't leave a bad taste in your mouth.
 
2014-02-14 08:30:01 PM  

sambluesnark: C-rats, while somewhat awkward to carry were usually edible.
On a plus side, if you had the time and wanted to heat them a pot/helmet of hot water would do the trick.
You could also use the hot water for your coffee or hot chocolate.
Or you could use the little paraffin pellet butterfly stove to heat the can's.

Enter the MRE. When we were first issued the original types of MRE's we knew we were in trouble. They came in a shiat brown bag.

Unlike the C-rats, to heat the first generation MRE's you used the hot water pot, but because of the protective coatings on the packages, you had to throw that water out and boil some more for the hot drinks. I understand that there is a small heater available now that forgoes the use of water,

The original MRE's serving portions were such that it usually took 2 packs to fill you up. The later generations have bigger servings.

C-rats had what was basically a hard tack type bread or cracker that tasted reasonably good and would survive most anything.
MRE's tried using regular saltine's which died the first time your ruck took any kind of jolt.
The freeze dried fruit was ....different.

The common consensus formed by my unit concerning the first generation MRE's?

What's the difference between an MRE and starving to death?
Starving doesn't leave a bad taste in your mouth.


Having tried both C rations and MREs, I thought the MREs were far better.  Now, the first MREs I tried had the heater pack, I think it was sometime in the late '80s.
 
2014-02-14 10:00:29 PM  
Why not just put the dough and other ingredients in two separate pouches to be combined before eating?
 
2014-02-14 10:40:41 PM  

DarkVader: sambluesnark: C-rats, while somewhat awkward to carry were usually edible.
On a plus side, if you had the time and wanted to heat them a pot/helmet of hot water would do the trick.
You could also use the hot water for your coffee or hot chocolate.
Or you could use the little paraffin pellet butterfly stove to heat the can's.

Enter the MRE. When we were first issued the original types of MRE's we knew we were in trouble. They came in a shiat brown bag.

Unlike the C-rats, to heat the first generation MRE's you used the hot water pot, but because of the protective coatings on the packages, you had to throw that water out and boil some more for the hot drinks. I understand that there is a small heater available now that forgoes the use of water,

The original MRE's serving portions were such that it usually took 2 packs to fill you up. The later generations have bigger servings.

C-rats had what was basically a hard tack type bread or cracker that tasted reasonably good and would survive most anything.
MRE's tried using regular saltine's which died the first time your ruck took any kind of jolt.
The freeze dried fruit was ....different.

The common consensus formed by my unit concerning the first generation MRE's?

What's the difference between an MRE and starving to death?
Starving doesn't leave a bad taste in your mouth.

Having tried both C rations and MREs, I thought the MREs were far better.  Now, the first MREs I tried had the heater pack, I think it was sometime in the late '80s.


If your MRE's came in the dark (shiat) brown pouch, that was the first generation and while there may have been one, I don't remember a heater.
The later one's with the light green pouch did have a heater.

Did you ever encounter the "T-Pack" meals? Trays like the family size servings in the grocery freezers.
Designed to be heat and eat for an entire unit. So many troops gets you so many trays. Meats, veggies, anything that needed to be hot. All you need is a hot water bath.
Weren't bad, but when Logistics screws up and all you get is lasagna for breakfast for a week; you're glad when the supply train catches up with you.
 
2014-02-14 10:50:25 PM  

Nasty Celt: Why not just put the dough and other ingredients in two separate pouches to be combined before eating?


Classic matzo?
 
2014-02-14 10:51:17 PM  

cretinbob: [siliconangle.com image 300x302]


Your post reminded me.
There was a First Sgt. or Sgt Major that retired and used his pension to open a pizza joint just outside a major base, can't remember if it was Riley or Hood.
He had a deal with Base Command.
As long as there was not an active tactical exercise in progress, a unit in the field could radio Range Control, have them call the pizza shop and place an order.
He would deliver to a 6 digit grid coordinate as long as it was on a hard or improved road. For safety reasons his drivers couldn't enter the tactical training areas.
 
2014-02-14 11:54:16 PM  

sambluesnark: C-rats, while somewhat awkward to carry were usually edible.
On a plus side, if you had the time and wanted to heat them a pot/helmet of hot water would do the trick.
You could also use the hot water for your coffee or hot chocolate.
Or you could use the little paraffin pellet butterfly stove to heat the can's.

Enter the MRE. When we were first issued the original types of MRE's we knew we were in trouble. They came in a shiat brown bag.

Unlike the C-rats, to heat the first generation MRE's you used the hot water pot, but because of the protective coatings on the packages, you had to throw that water out and boil some more for the hot drinks. I understand that there is a small heater available now that forgoes the use of water,

The original MRE's serving portions were such that it usually took 2 packs to fill you up. The later generations have bigger servings.

C-rats had what was basically a hard tack type bread or cracker that tasted reasonably good and would survive most anything.
MRE's tried using regular saltine's which died the first time your ruck took any kind of jolt.
The freeze dried fruit was ....different.

The common consensus formed by my unit concerning the first generation MRE's?

What's the difference between an MRE and starving to death?
Starving doesn't leave a bad taste in your mouth.


It's been over 40 years now, but, the only C-ration that I remember liking was beans and meatballs.  Of course, later that night I was jet propelled.  I was long gone before MRE's, so I have no experience with those.  The C-rations from my era are probably still good, if they were stored properly.
 
2014-02-15 12:21:58 AM  

zimbomba63: sambluesnark: C-rats, while somewhat awkward to carry were usually edible.
On a plus side, if you had the time and wanted to heat them a pot/helmet of hot water would do the trick.
You could also use the hot water for your coffee or hot chocolate.
Or you could use the little paraffin pellet butterfly stove to heat the can's.

Enter the MRE. When we were first issued the original types of MRE's we knew we were in trouble. They came in a shiat brown bag.

Unlike the C-rats, to heat the first generation MRE's you used the hot water pot, but because of the protective coatings on the packages, you had to throw that water out and boil some more for the hot drinks. I understand that there is a small heater available now that forgoes the use of water,

The original MRE's serving portions were such that it usually took 2 packs to fill you up. The later generations have bigger servings.

C-rats had what was basically a hard tack type bread or cracker that tasted reasonably good and would survive most anything.
MRE's tried using regular saltine's which died the first time your ruck took any kind of jolt.
The freeze dried fruit was ....different.

The common consensus formed by my unit concerning the first generation MRE's?

What's the difference between an MRE and starving to death?
Starving doesn't leave a bad taste in your mouth.

It's been over 40 years now, but, the only C-ration that I remember liking was beans and meatballs.  Of course, later that night I was jet propelled.  I was long gone before MRE's, so I have no experience with those.  The C-rations from my era are probably still good, if they were stored properly.


I found that if you got it warm enough the ham and eggs weren't bad. The stews could be hot or cold and still reasonably decent. The "beans and m@@@@@f**+r's" were horrible no matter what.
The cheese, bread/cracker's, coffee and chocolate were much better than the one's from the MRE's that I had.

I believe that the shelf life of C-rats is approximately 2 to 3 times that of an Original Twinkie
 
2014-02-15 01:06:18 AM  

Nasty Celt: Why not just put the dough and other ingredients in two separate pouches to be combined before eating?


It just seems to be an easy solution to the soggy dough problem. You could even boil them in the bags to heat them as long as all moisture is removed from the dough section. Make it more of a cracker than standard pizza dough. Another option is to just boil the toppings.
 
2014-02-15 02:41:24 AM  

Saborlas: Who the hell is gonna have room in their pack for a full slice of New York style ketchup-cardboard?


grinding_journalist: Who the hell is gonna have room for a slice (chunk?) of Chicago-style bread, sauce and cheese casserole ?


That took 10 posts? Man you guys are slow.
 
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