If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Short List)   The worst films to watch with your other half on Valentine's. Or best, if you want to dump them   (shortlist.com) divider line 81
    More: Advice, Kathleen Turner, bad movies, Fatal Attraction, Romancing the Stone, Manic Pixie Dream Girl, Clive Owen, Ryan Gosling, William Hurt  
•       •       •

5055 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 14 Feb 2014 at 9:12 AM (30 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



81 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2014-02-14 09:19:03 AM
The list fails without "The Human Centipede".
 
2014-02-14 09:25:16 AM
How about "The Crying Game" for a first date?

"Body Heat" seemed just like an Eighties'd-up 'Double Indemnity' or 'Postman Always Rings Twice' - can't remember, it's been awhile.  I just remember that it seemed like a hack copy of a decent old film.
 
2014-02-14 09:34:56 AM
List fails without Lawrence of Arabia

\200+ minutes long - not a single woman as dialog.
\\"Flamboyant" NTTAWWT
 
2014-02-14 09:35:54 AM
Every year we watch the same movie, Tommy.  Never fails to get us both in the mood
 
2014-02-14 09:36:33 AM
I bought Revolutionary Road for my wife just yesterday.  It's kind of a joke that it's a valentine's day present because of the story but we both love the movie.
 
2014-02-14 09:38:07 AM
Me: "Hey Honey?"
Her: "Yeah?"
Me: "Which of these movies do you want to watch tonight?"
 
2014-02-14 09:41:02 AM
I don't care about 2-9, although they seem legit, the list is validated by #1 alone.
 
2014-02-14 09:41:47 AM
"Your Friends and Neighbors" is a pretty good choice, too. Really, anything by Neil Labute.
 
2014-02-14 09:42:56 AM
"Ooh, Happiness, that sounds like a cheerful film, let's watch that"

/yeah, it didn't last long
 
2014-02-14 09:43:21 AM
war of the roses is one of my favorites.

that depends on what you put into the pate'.............WOOF
 
2014-02-14 09:47:40 AM
On my first date with what turned out to be the current spousal equivalent, I rented a few indie movies I had heard good things about but hadn't seen. We watched:

Spanking the Monkey
The House of Yes
Angels and Insects
The Sweet Hereafter

So, yeah.
 
2014-02-14 09:51:27 AM
The Cook, the Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover
 
2014-02-14 09:52:11 AM
The first movie the, now, wife and I saw was 'Face Off' or 'Men in Black' depending on which of us you ask. Tens of thousands of movies later, we're still going strong.
 
2014-02-14 09:54:55 AM

DammitIForgotMyLogin: "Ooh, Happiness, that sounds like a cheerful film, let's watch that"

/yeah, it didn't last long


Haha, came here to post Happiness. My college roommate used to watch that with new boyfriends, she said if they laughed at Dylan Baker mowing people down in the park, they were a keeper.
 
2014-02-14 09:56:27 AM
31.media.tumblr.com

Then give her a cake.
 
2014-02-14 09:58:39 AM
derekwinnert.com
 
2014-02-14 10:06:06 AM

Uzzah: On my first date with what turned out to be the current spousal equivalent, I rented a few indie movies I had heard good things about but hadn't seen. We watched:

Spanking the Monkey
The House of Yes
Angels and Insects
The Sweet Hereafter

So, yeah.


The Sweet Hereafter was pretty good.  Not a good date movie.
 
mhd
2014-02-14 10:10:01 AM
The Gor movies?

Any movie by Frank Miller?
 
2014-02-14 10:16:23 AM
Heh, my first date with my most recent GF constituted a movie marathon of "Kentucky Fried Movie," "Love at First Bite," and "Zorro the Gay Blade."

/and to think I actually got lucky that night too...
//She eventually went crazy, got obsessed with the show "Once Upon a Time," convinced herself that she is Rumplestiltskin and moved to AZ to live a deviant lifestyle with another weirdo who is convinced she is Belle.
 
2014-02-14 10:16:24 AM

Uzzah: On my first date with what turned out to be the current spousal equivalent, I rented a few indie movies I had heard good things about but hadn't seen. We watched:

Spanking the Monkey
The House of Yes
Angels and Insects
The Sweet Hereafter

So, yeah.


So did your sister spousal equivalent get the hint?
 
2014-02-14 10:21:39 AM

Uzzah: On my first date with what turned out to be the current spousal equivalent, I rented a few indie movies I had heard good things about but hadn't seen. We watched:

Spanking the Monkey
The House of Yes
Angels and Insects
The Sweet Hereafter

So, yeah.


You watched four movies on a first date? A single date?

Sheesh.
 
2014-02-14 10:23:45 AM
Hm. As a young teen our first "movie date" with this girl I'd been seeing was "Falling Down". I'm not sure how that came about to be the choice, anymore, I'd have to go see what else was playing when it was in theaters.

I may have had slightly different expectations about the content of the movie, this being well before Internet.

First "movie" with actual wife (when we were dating, we'd been friends for quite some time and had seen movies before) may have been Varsity Blues on cable.

As it turns out, neither of us has enough of a sweet tooth to really make the whipped cream thing work.
 
2014-02-14 10:27:11 AM
Kids - 1995

IMDB - A day in the life of a group of teens as they travel around New York City skating, drinking, smoking, and deflowering virgins.
 
2014-02-14 10:38:31 AM

Billy Liar: How about "The Crying Game" for a first date?

"Body Heat" seemed just like an Eighties'd-up 'Double Indemnity' or 'Postman Always Rings Twice' - can't remember, it's been awhile.  I just remember that it seemed like a hack copy of a decent old film.


A hack copy with a crazy hot Kathleen Turner. Doesn't belong on that list at all.
 
2014-02-14 10:55:13 AM
I was single on Valentine's Day once and I ended up watching "Rudy".

"Rudy" is of course an inspirational movie which shows people that with hard work and courage, a person can achieve any goal. Naturally my take away back then was "Rudy can play football for Notre Dame and become a farking sports legend and I can't even get a farking date"
 
2014-02-14 11:03:12 AM
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-02-14 11:03:15 AM

mhd: Any movie by Frank Miller?


Eh, Sin City wasn't that bad.

//Rosario Dawson in fishnets
 
2014-02-14 11:09:45 AM
This is going to sound odd... but from my experience, a REALLY good panty-dropper flick is...

American Beauty.

Funny, weird, amusing.... then you get hit in the end with this sense of 'you gotta live while you can!'

/Got laid SOOOO many times after that movie..
//Thanks Kevin Spacy
 
2014-02-14 11:10:48 AM

bad_blood: I bought Revolutionary Road for my wife just yesterday.  It's kind of a joke that it's a valentine's day present because of the story but we both love the movie.


i hated that movie. wanted to slit my wrists when i left the theater. i wanted to see gran torino but no...got overruled.

i will admit that it is terrificly acted, well written, beautifully shot, all of that good stuff... just a truly depressing story.
 
2014-02-14 11:13:52 AM
The Weather Man was a goodun.  An example of a solid Nic Cage performance.

www.underthegunreview.net

Funny and gut-punchy at times.
 
2014-02-14 11:21:29 AM

Cheron: Every year we watch the same movie, Tommy.  Never fails to get us both in the mood


My wife and I prefer "Tommy Boy"
 
2014-02-14 11:40:58 AM
Grave of the Fireflies.  That will kill the mood for the night, no question.
 
2014-02-14 11:43:39 AM
In the company of men.
The myth of the male orgasm.
 
2014-02-14 11:44:38 AM
img.fark.net

/I'm old school.
 
2014-02-14 11:48:14 AM
I saw American Me on a first date. If you've never seen it, it's chock full of prison rape, violence, more rape, prison riots, women smuggling drugs in their vajayjays, poop, and more rape. We dated for 2 years after that but I was never allowed to choose a movie again.

/did not get lucky that night
 
2014-02-14 11:51:00 AM
Kinda of related/CSB

Was going to go on a third date with a gal and I asked her what she wanted to do. She looooved Brad Pitt and really wanted to see his new movie, Se7en. I'd seen the ads and I tried to change her mind but she wouldn't listen. I kept asking if she was sure and she kept confirming that she wanted to see the movie.

Needless to say she wasn't too happy when we got out of the movie and couldn't believe that was Gwyneth Paltrow's head in the box.

/Didn't get any that night
//Took until the 5th date
 
2014-02-14 11:51:58 AM
On the first date we went to a double fature. Patch Adams and October Sky.

Patch Adams sucked and was depressing to boot. Thank god October Sky was a neat flick.
 
2014-02-14 11:54:49 AM
Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

Neither of us wanted anal after watching that.
 
2014-02-14 12:01:20 PM

State_College_Arsonist: Grave of the Fireflies.  That will kill the mood for the night, no question.


That was the only anime my wife has EVER liked.
 
2014-02-14 12:05:13 PM

pinchpoint: I saw American Me on a first date. If you've never seen it, it's chock full of prison rape, violence, more rape, prison riots, women smuggling drugs in their vajayjays, poop, and more rape. We dated for 2 years after that but I was never allowed to choose a movie again.

/did not get lucky that night


You said rape more than once.

3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-02-14 12:13:40 PM
I met a woman at a friend's party, we hit it off, I walked her to her car at the end of the evening and got her phone number. I called her a few days later to ask her out the upcoming weekend, she was adamant about seeing a movie premiering that weekend.

"What's Love Got To Do With It" is not an ideal first date movie, but would be a great Valentines day rental if you wanted to end a relationship.

About 20 minutes in, we were both squirming in our seats, not in a good way. Half way through, she reached over and took my hand. We laughed about it afterwards, and dated for a few months.
 
2014-02-14 12:15:20 PM

Porous Horace: In the company of men.


It's been a few years since I watched that movie.  That's the one with the contest and the deaf girl, correct?
 
2014-02-14 12:25:23 PM
1. A Clockwork Orange - 1971 - Stanley Kubrick
2. Alexandra's Project - 2003 - Rolf De Heer
3. A Serbian Film - 2011 - Srđan Spasojević
4. Aftermath - 1994 - Nacho Cerdà
5. American History X - 1998 - Tony Kaye
6. Anatomy of Hell - Catherine Breillat
7. Antichrist - 2009 - Lars von Trier
8. Audition - 1999 - Takashi Miike
9. August Underground - 2001 - Fred Vogel
10. A Zed + Two Noughts - Peter Greenaway
11. Bad Boy Bubby - 1993 - Rolf de Heer
12. Begotten - 1991 - E. Elias Merhige
13. Benny's Video - 1992 - Michael Haneke
14. Blood Feast - 1963 - Herschell Gordon Lewis
15. Blue Velvet - 1986 - David Lynch
16. Caché - 2005 - Michael Haneke
17. Calvaire - 2004 - Fabrice Du Welz
18. Cannibal Holocaust - 1980 - Ruggero Deodato
19. Cutting Moments - 1999 - Douglas Buck
20. Deadgirl - 2008 - Marcel Sarmiento + Gadi Harel
21. Deliverance - 1972 - John Boorman
22. Dream Lover - 1993 - Nicholas Kazan
23. Dumplings - 2004 - Fruit Chan
24. Ebola Syndrome - 1996 - Herman Yau
25. El Topo - 1970 - Alejandro Jodorowsky
26. Eraserhead - 1977 - David Lynch
27. Eyes Without A Face - 1960 - Georges Franju
28. Feed - 2005 - Brett Leonard
29. Flowers Of Flesh + Blood - 1985 - Hideshi Hino
30. Freaks - 1932 - Tod Browning
31. Funny Games - 1997 - Michael Haneke
32. Gozu - 2003 - Takashi Miike
33. Gummo - 1997 - Harmony Korine
34. Happiness - 1998 - Todd Solondz
35. Hard Candy - 2005 - David Slade
36. Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer - 1986 - John McNaughton
37. High Tension - 2003 - Alexandre Aja
38. Hostel - 2005 - Eli Roth
39. Ichi The Killer - 2001 - Takashi Miike
40. In A Glass Cage - 1987 - Agustí Villaronga
41. In My Skin - 2002 - Marina De Van
42. Innocence - 2004 - Lucile Hadzihalilovic
43. Inside - Alexandre Bustillo + Julien Maury
44. Intimacy - 2001 - Patrice Chéreau
45. Irréversible - 2002 - Vincent Cassel
46. I Spit On Your Grave - 1978 - Meir Zarchi
47. I Stand Alone - 1998 - Gaspar Noé
48. Johnny Got His Gun - 1971 - Dalton Trumbo
49. Ken Park - 2002 - Larry Clark + Edward Lachman
50. Kichiku - 1997u - Kazuyoshi Kumakiri
51. Kill List - 2012 - Ben Wheatley
52. King of the Ants - 2003 - Stuart Gordon
53. Man Bites Dog - 1992 - Rémy Belvaux + André Bonzel
54. Maniac - 1980 - William Lustig
55. Martyrs - 2008 - Pascal Laugier
56. Meet The Feebles - 1989 - Peter Jackson
57. Men Behind The Sun - 1988 - Tun Fei Mou (as T.F. Mous)
58. Murder-Set-Pieces - 2004 - Nick Palumbo
59. Natural Born Killers - 1994 - Oliver Stone
60. Nekromantik - 1987 - Jörg Buttgereit
61. Night + Fog - 1955 - Alain Resnais
62. Oldboy - 2003 - Chan-wook Park
63. Philosophy of a Knife - 2008 - Andrey Iskanov
64. Pink Flamingos - 1972 - John Waters
65. Repulsion - 1965 - Roman Polanski
66. Requiem For A Dream - 2000 - Darren Aronofsky
67. Ringu - 1998 - Hideo Nakata
68. Salò, or 120 Days Of Sodom - 1975 - Pier Palo Pasolini
69. Santa Sangre - 1989 - Alejandro Jodorowsky
70. Se72n - 1995 - David Fincher
71. Shivers (They Came From Within) - 1975 - David Cronenberg
72. Sombre - 1998 - Philippe Grandrieux
73. Straw Dogs - 1971 - Sam Peckinpah
74. Suicide Club - 2001 - Shion Sono
75. Sweet Movie - 1974 - Dusan Makavejev
76. Taxidermia - 2006 - György Pálfi
77. Teeth - 2007 - Mitchell Lichtenstein
78. Tetsuo: The Iron Man - 1989 - Shin'ya Tsukamoto
79. The Bunny Game - 2012 - Adam Rehmeler
80. The Cement Garden - 1993 - Andrew Birkin
81. The Doom Generation - 1995 - Gregg Araki
82. The Exorcist - 1973 - William Friedkin
83. The Idiots - 1998 - Lars Von Trier
84. The Girl Next Door - 2007 - Gregory Wilson
 
2014-02-14 12:31:41 PM
 
2014-02-14 12:39:20 PM
LOL....THIS!

/i should feel bad for this.."snerk"
 
2014-02-14 01:10:33 PM
Well don't rent "forgetting sarah marshall" if you're attempting to reconcile with an ex and there has been questions of infidelity during the times you were not together.
 
2014-02-14 01:12:29 PM

Chulainn: Well don't rent "forgetting sarah marshall" if you're attempting to reconcile with an ex and there has been questions of infidelity during the times you were not together.


How can there be infidelity when you're not together?

//On a break.
 
2014-02-14 01:17:35 PM

mjbok: Chulainn: Well don't rent "forgetting sarah marshall" if you're attempting to reconcile with an ex and there has been questions of infidelity during the times you were not together.

How can there be infidelity when you're not together?

//On a break.


akamai.paramountcomedy.com
 
2014-02-14 01:18:36 PM
ecx.images-amazon.com

really needs a fake romcom trailer
 
2014-02-14 01:29:09 PM

mjbok: How can there be infidelity when you're not together?


That's what I kept saying
Team Ross.
 
Displayed 50 of 81 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report