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(Daily Mail)   'I am running away because you think I farted when I didn't'   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 6
    More: Amusing, god, matter of fact, baby brother  
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8418 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Feb 2014 at 3:19 AM (30 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
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2014-02-13 08:23:51 AM
2 votes:
CSB

I have two girls. They are currently 9 and 7. They fart at home, and they are not ashamed.
A couple years ago the oldest one asked me what to do if she had to fart at school.
I told her to blame it on a boy sitting next to her.
I got a note at the beginning of this year that she had been written up for bullying because she made fun of a boy who had passed gas in the classroom.
Appearantly he had run out of the classroom crying.
When I asked her what happened, she said she did what I'd told her to do.
She was ok though, because nobody believed him when he said "nuh uh! it was HER!"

/CSB
2014-02-13 05:19:31 AM
2 votes:

Solid State Vittles: I hope the kid that wrote the "denied it, supplied it" note referenced in the headline winds up being the guy that oozes  SBD's in long elevator rides as an adult.  If he's dressed professionally, you know, suit and tie or whatever, all the better, especially if he maybe gives a little squat and grimace while letting it fly.


I always wondered, what happens if you get stuck in an elevator for hours on end with a bunch of people, and someone really needs to shiat?

After much deliberation, I decided the most adult and mature course of action would be a "two handbag/briefcase system". Everyone puts their recording devices in bag and places it in the middle of the elevator. The persons then shiats in the other bag in one corner, whilst everyone crowds into the furthest corner, facing away.

That much seems common sense but what I can't figure out is; when you are shiatting, what if someone peeks and sees your boner?
2014-02-13 08:05:21 PM
1 votes:

eyemarten: zzrhardy: Solid State Vittles: I hope the kid that wrote the "denied it, supplied it" note referenced in the headline winds up being the guy that oozes  SBD's in long elevator rides as an adult.  If he's dressed professionally, you know, suit and tie or whatever, all the better, especially if he maybe gives a little squat and grimace while letting it fly.

I always wondered, what happens if you get stuck in an elevator for hours on end with a bunch of people, and someone really needs to shiat?

After much deliberation, I decided the most adult and mature course of action would be a "two handbag/briefcase system". Everyone puts their recording devices in bag and places it in the middle of the elevator. The persons then shiats in the other bag in one corner, whilst everyone crowds into the furthest corner, facing away.

That much seems common sense but what I can't figure out is; when you are shiatting, what if someone peeks and sees your boner?


Wait a minute.

Why does everyone seem to be glossing over the poop boner comment?

Am I to understand that Zzrhardy gets a boner when pooping?

W. T. F. ???


You mean, you wouldn't have a boner whilst crapping in an elevator that contains trapped people?

Your weird.
2014-02-13 03:27:44 AM
1 votes:

Solid State Vittles: I hope the kid that wrote the "denied it, supplied it" note referenced in the headline winds up being the guy that oozes  SBD's in long elevator rides as an adult.  If he's dressed professionally, you know, suit and tie or whatever, all the better, especially if he maybe gives a little squat and grimace while letting it fly.


The executives have every right to let you know where you stand with them when they ride in the elevator.  The best way is to look you straight in the eye, wordlessly staring as they lift their leg slightly and let out an audible and very noxious fart.  That is for you.  Appreciate it...love it.  Your bonus has arrived.

Now you know where you stand.  Isn't it courteous of them?
2014-02-13 03:02:13 AM
1 votes:
I hope the kid that wrote the "denied it, supplied it" note referenced in the headline winds up being the guy that oozes  SBD's in long elevator rides as an adult.  If he's dressed professionally, you know, suit and tie or whatever, all the better, especially if he maybe gives a little squat and grimace while letting it fly.
2014-02-13 12:23:31 AM
1 votes:
I am running away because of pixels.  I can tell.
 
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