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(WWSB ABC 7)   Grandma complains that her little snowflake is being publicly shamed at school by not getting the same reward that other students earned   (mysuncoast.com) divider line 82
    More: Florida, elementary schools, positive reinforcement, grandmother  
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11080 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Feb 2014 at 1:37 AM (40 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-02-11 11:54:53 PM  
"Rewarding" them by allowing them to not wear uniforms acknowledges that the students hate wearing uniforms.

And as a result they have a small minority of students wearing uniforms while no one else is wearing them, a situation that would be cited as disruptive if the situation were reversed.

Everything about this story is stupid.
 
2014-02-12 01:41:02 AM  
www.blogcdn.com
 
2014-02-12 01:44:19 AM  

fusillade762: "Rewarding" them by allowing them to not wear uniforms acknowledges that the students hate wearing uniforms.


Yep...

You sent them to a school that has uniforms in the first place. Deal with it.
 
2014-02-12 01:48:23 AM  
Have we reached the point where it is not only acceptable but responsible behavior to slap the shiat out of parents who act like this?
 
2014-02-12 01:49:53 AM  
Just give her a sash that says "I didn't meet the requirements but I got the same reward as you anyway because my gramdma complained" and let her wear it over her street clothes. Problem solved.
 
2014-02-12 01:50:30 AM  

maram500: Have we reached the point where it is not only acceptable but responsible behavior to slap the shiat out of parents who act like this?


If by "slap" you mean "punch in the genitals repeatedly, until they can no longer produce offspring", I'm with you.
 
2014-02-12 01:52:19 AM  
And no hot lunch either.

Cheese sandwich for you!
 
2014-02-12 01:52:44 AM  
I remember getting an award for not getting written up all year. Now THAT was goddamn embarrassing.
 
2014-02-12 01:57:12 AM  
In the school I went to, poor attendance and grades resulted in mandatory after school study sessions. This made sense because the extra forced study time helped improve grades. Students with good grades had more free time. It was a reward system that made sense. I can understand where the school is coming from with this reward system, but since it doesn't actually relate to behavior that relates to performance, it's not going to be very effective.
 
2014-02-12 01:57:38 AM  

squirrelflavoredyogurt: maram500: Have we reached the point where it is not only acceptable but responsible behavior to slap the shiat out of parents who act like this?

If by "slap" you mean "punch in the genitals repeatedly, until they can no longer produce offspring", I'm with you.


Use a 4x4 wrapped in rusty barbed wire and you've got my vote.
/I know parents like this, they're farking enabling morans.
//but my snowflake is special!!!
 
2014-02-12 01:57:40 AM  

squirrelflavoredyogurt: maram500: Have we reached the point where it is not only acceptable but responsible behavior to slap the shiat out of parents who act like this?

If by "slap" you mean "punch in the genitals repeatedly, until they can no longer produce offspring", I'm with you.


It's a grandmother, so "slapping until her eyeballs fall out" might be an alternative.
 
2014-02-12 01:58:33 AM  

Zarquon's Flat Tire: I remember getting an award for not getting written up all year. Now THAT was goddamn embarrassing.


I remember the kid who was the only student in High School to have never missed a day of school for any reason, and got a certificate for it. While everyone else was puzzled at the idea of someone never missing a day of school from their Freshmen year to their Senior year, I kind of wondered if he was going to grow up to be Bruce Willis from Unbreakable.
 
2014-02-12 02:00:03 AM  
First, yes, she is being shamed. Imagine you are an adult (presumably you are) an adult workplace, and you are forced to strip out of your clothes and given a uniform to wear unlike all other employees because of poor performance. It is a type of psychological abuse.

Second, a child isn't a "snowflake" because she has an advocate for her welfare in life. Would it be better if no one in her life cared that she was crying at school?

Third, this school is farking nuts. This reminds me of those idiot parents in waiting rooms who ask their kids to do 10 million things while sitting perfectly still and yell at the kid for not doing the 10 million things perfectly.

The school should be happy that this kid finally showed up! Showing up for school and "having good work habits" are 100% the domain of a parent when a kid is 6 years old. They should spend more time figuring out why the parent can't get the kid to school rather than playing these stupid games about which clothes to wear on which day and who gets to wear what! That's like the parent with 10 million rules in the waiting room. Why are they even in school? I wish I could fly these morons to Sweden and show them a day in the life of a Swedish elementary school. They are farking humanistic! It is so easy to be a good parent/teacher/caregiver, and yet people fark it up all the time!
 
2014-02-12 02:00:28 AM  
Why do Kindergartners have a uniform policy?  There are only three reasons to have uniforms.  First, it let's you keep out gang clothing, without having to nitpick what is and isn't gang attire.  Are the five year old kids in this school part of a gang?

Second, to get people to confirm to an ideal of modesty.  You know, so the students are not dressing too sexy, and causing other students to have impure thoughts.  While the value of such moral thinking is questionable, what should not be, is that you don't really have to worry about rug rats trying to turn each other on.  If you do worry about kindergartners being sexy, then you are probably the one with the problem.

Finally, you are trying to get everyone to confirm, so that you can reduce bullying, by making it less obvious whose families have more money and/or style, then anyone else.  Do five year old kids talk smack about the kid wearing the fake Levi's?
 
2014-02-12 02:00:32 AM  
Soooo...  Let's just throw it all to the breeze and stop teaching kids that there are repercussions for their actions early in life.  Just let them do whatever they like and reward them the same as the kids that work for it.  I'm sure that will teach them all a really great lesson about how life really works and encourage them to work harder.
 
2014-02-12 02:02:28 AM  

ThunderChicken: Soooo...  Let's just throw it all to the breeze and stop teaching kids that there are repercussions for their actions early in life.  Just let them do whatever they like and reward them the same as the kids that work for it.  I'm sure that will teach them all a really great lesson about how life really works and encourage them to work harder.


Honestly, I think school uniforms are a stupid practice and contribute nothing to the education experience, learning or anything at all and they suppress individuality. Every day should be no uniform day.
 
2014-02-12 02:03:17 AM  

Some Coke Drinking Guy: Why do Kindergartners have a uniform policy?  There are only three reasons to have uniforms.  First, it let's you keep out gang clothing, without having to nitpick what is and isn't gang attire.  Are the five year old kids in this school part of a gang?


2.bp.blogspot.com
4.bp.blogspot.com
www.nydailynews.com
llwproductions.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-02-12 02:05:12 AM  

ThunderChicken: Soooo...  Let's just throw it all to the breeze and stop teaching kids that there are repercussions for their actions early in life.  Just let them do whatever they like and reward them the same as the kids that work for it.  I'm sure that will teach them all a really great lesson about how life really works and encourage them to work harder.


That's been the hippie mantra since the '60s, if it feels good, do it!
/that shiat isn't working very well is it?
 
2014-02-12 02:07:26 AM  

Massively Multiplayer Addict: Every day should be no uniform day.


But...but... then how are the plebes on the street supposed to know that I'm dropping 20K a year to send my snowflake to private school?

/and it's not "psychological abuse" FFS.  If you didn't measure up, you didn't measure up.  Our company just had a DR test last month and those who responded within the test window at head office got to wear jeans all week.  Those who didn't, didn't.  Buck up and respond quicker next time guys.
 
2014-02-12 02:07:28 AM  

Massively Multiplayer Addict: ThunderChicken: Soooo...  Let's just throw it all to the breeze and stop teaching kids that there are repercussions for their actions early in life.  Just let them do whatever they like and reward them the same as the kids that work for it.  I'm sure that will teach them all a really great lesson about how life really works and encourage them to work harder.

Honestly, I think school uniforms are a stupid practice and contribute nothing to the education experience, learning or anything at all and they suppress individuality. Every day should be no uniform day.


You must live in a location where there are no gang problems, and/or where girls (or boys) showing up dressed like the hooker on the corner is not an issue. At the school where I mediate, uniforms are a dire necessity, as it keeps the local gangbangers from having a reason to open fire on the kids when they walk home from school.

That said, it's really a case-by-case basis. Some schools don't have a need for uniforms, and there's probably no reason to force kids to buy the sweatshop gear in tacky school colors just because the PTA feels it would be good for them.
 
2014-02-12 02:10:12 AM  
They are farking SIX and you have stupid reward schemes for attendance and shiat like that?

People are farking nuts.
 
2014-02-12 02:11:21 AM  

barc0001: Our company just had a DR test last month and those who responded within the test window at head office got to wear jeans all week.


How very soul crushing.
 
2014-02-12 02:31:35 AM  

swingerofbirches: Second, a child isn't a "snowflake" because she has an advocate for her welfare in life. Would it be better if no one in her life cared that she was crying at school?


She's 6.  Without her stupid grandmother, she would have forgotten about this by now but since grandmother is making a huge deal out of it, she'll never forget the time she was "humiliated" by facing some consequences even if those seem a bit unfair.
 
2014-02-12 02:32:00 AM  
I'm with the snowflake on this one. It's one thing to reward/punish students based for things nominally within a student's control, but attendance among kindergartners generally isn't within their control. You shouldn't "blame" 6-year-olds who have chronic diseases or catch contagious diseases that cause absences, or have parent(s)/guardian(s) who fails to get them to school on time for whatever reason. It would be different if they were addressing unexcused absences or tardiness which were the child's fault, as happens much more commonly with older students. But this just sounds messed up.
 
2014-02-12 02:40:34 AM  

T Baggins: I'm with the snowflake on this one. It's one thing to reward/punish students based for things nominally within a student's control, but attendance among kindergartners generally isn't within their control. You shouldn't "blame" 6-year-olds who have chronic diseases or catch contagious diseases that cause absences, or have parent(s)/guardian(s) who fails to get them to school on time for whatever reason. It would be different if they were addressing unexcused absences or tardiness which were the child's fault, as happens much more commonly with older students. But this just sounds messed up.


Except that "blaming" students would mean something like keeping the non-perfect attendae students in at recess or the like.

The elementary school my mother works at (and that my nieces attend...yes on special permission) does stuff like this. Conduct, attendance, reading beyond what is required, et cetera--all those will get special rewards, and parents don't biatch and moan. (Well, 99.9999% of parents don't complain. One did, but that's because she is a biatchy asshole.)

What the school in the story is saying is "Good job! Now see what being dedicated to what you're doing will get you? Reflect on this as you grow up."
 
2014-02-12 02:43:45 AM  

ladyfortuna: fusillade762: "Rewarding" them by allowing them to not wear uniforms acknowledges that the students hate wearing uniforms.

Yep...

You sent them to a school that has uniforms in the first place. Deal with it.


It's a public school, so not usually much choice on where they go.
 
2014-02-12 02:44:28 AM  
Oops, too late. grandma has already reproduced. By fission, like all bacteria.
 
2014-02-12 02:44:42 AM  
What I'd be curious to know is if the parents knew ahead of time that the kid didn't qualify for the reward and sent her in regular clothes anyhow. If they did know then they set her up for any humiliation she felt. If they didn't know then that is some piss poor communication going on by the school, the parents or both.
 
2014-02-12 02:57:45 AM  
Really? Kindergarten uniforms? That's just strange. Uniforms start to make sense when you get to an age where fashion can cause socioeconomic stratification.

And stay away from plaid schoolgirl skirts in highschool. That's just being kinky.
 
2014-02-12 03:07:25 AM  

maram500: T Baggins: I'm with the snowflake on this one. It's one thing to reward/punish students based for things nominally within a student's control, but attendance among kindergartners generally isn't within their control. You shouldn't "blame" 6-year-olds who have chronic diseases or catch contagious diseases that cause absences, or have parent(s)/guardian(s) who fails to get them to school on time for whatever reason. It would be different if they were addressing unexcused absences or tardiness which were the child's fault, as happens much more commonly with older students. But this just sounds messed up.

Except that "blaming" students would mean something like keeping the non-perfect attendae students in at recess or the like.

The elementary school my mother works at (and that my nieces attend...yes on special permission) does stuff like this. Conduct, attendance, reading beyond what is required, et cetera--all those will get special rewards, and parents don't biatch and moan. (Well, 99.9999% of parents don't complain. One did, but that's because she is a biatchy asshole.)

What the school in the story is saying is "Good job! Now see what being dedicated to what you're doing will get you? Reflect on this as you grow up."


Students have control over conduct and reading, and I have no quibble about behavior modification regarding them. Student's do not generally have control over attendance at age 6. Viewing it as punishment or reward is fairly arbitrary; the superintendent said "it's not an ostracizing situation," but as the grandmother said, if you're one of 20% of the class who is forced to wear a uniform, that does seem designed to make you stand out.

As a personal anecdote, I had the shiat kicked out of me at school when I was i the first grade; fractured ribs, ruptured kidney, lots of missed school. How would you square that with the idea of making me dress differently from the majority of students? There are many horrible reasons kids miss school, and for many kids, missing school is its own punishment.
 
2014-02-12 03:11:01 AM  

punkwrestler: ladyfortuna: fusillade762: "Rewarding" them by allowing them to not wear uniforms acknowledges that the students hate wearing uniforms.

Yep...

You sent them to a school that has uniforms in the first place. Deal with it.

It's a public school, so not usually much choice on where they go.


Fine... you chose to move to a school district that has uniforms. Better?

/parents chose where to live based on schools
//no uniforms, yet I grew up to wear the camo...
 
2014-02-12 03:28:15 AM  

fusillade762: "Rewarding" them by allowing them to not wear uniforms acknowledges that the students hate wearing uniforms.

And as a result they have a small minority of students wearing uniforms while no one else is wearing them, a situation that would be cited as disruptive if the situation were reversed.

Everything about this story is stupid.


Yes its because parents can't be trusted now to dress their kids correctly, a school near us had to have monitors for how short girls skirts/shorts were the past few years. Moronic parents were sending kids to school in what was basically underwear. They had teachers sitting at the doors measuring every girl and turning them to the office to wait for clothes or patents to come get them.

Bottom line is that if parents were on top of it to start with uniforms wouldn't be needed and if this little shiat was made to show up and do their work then they could have worn normal clothes.
 
2014-02-12 03:31:15 AM  

Some Coke Drinking Guy: Why do Kindergartners have a uniform policy?  There are only three reasons to have uniforms.  First, it let's you keep out gang clothing, without having to nitpick what is and isn't gang attire.  Are the five year old kids in this school part of a gang?

Second, to get people to confirm to an ideal of modesty.  You know, so the students are not dressing too sexy, and causing other students to have impure thoughts.  While the value of such moral thinking is questionable, what should not be, is that you don't really have to worry about rug rats trying to turn each other on.  If you do worry about kindergartners being sexy, then you are probably the one with the problem.

Finally, you are trying to get everyone to confirm, so that you can reduce bullying, by making it less obvious whose families have more money and/or style, then anyone else.  Do five year old kids talk smack about the kid wearing the fake Levi's?


Conform...
 
2014-02-12 03:41:29 AM  
Reminds me of the "Let them walk" controversy we had about 5 or 10 years ago, in the Chicagoland southern suburbs.  It involved parents upset that their kids would not be allowed to participate in the graduation ceremony, simply because they hadn't met the requirements for actual graduation.  The parents felt that the school administrators should "Let them walk", with robes and mortar board, and receive a piece of paper on stage, no matter whether they were getting a diploma or not, so that the child and family could celebrate, just like everyone else, and nobody would feel left out.  The take away is, now a days, actually accomplishing something is irrelevant, it's being part of the farking show that's important.  Oh yeah, and morons beget morons.
 
2014-02-12 04:07:02 AM  

wildcardjack: Really? Kindergarten uniforms? That's just strange. Uniforms start to make sense when you get to an age where fashion can cause socioeconomic stratification.

And stay away from plaid schoolgirl skirts in highschool. That's just being kinky.


My wife still has all her plaid schoolgirl uniforms from HS. AND they still fit.

/the skirts at the same HS these days are a good 3-4 inches shorter.
 
2014-02-12 04:08:06 AM  

maram500: T Baggins: I'm with the snowflake on this one. It's one thing to reward/punish students based for things nominally within a student's control, but attendance among kindergartners generally isn't within their control. You shouldn't "blame" 6-year-olds who have chronic diseases or catch contagious diseases that cause absences, or have parent(s)/guardian(s) who fails to get them to school on time for whatever reason. It would be different if they were addressing unexcused absences or tardiness which were the child's fault, as happens much more commonly with older students. But this just sounds messed up.

Except that "blaming" students would mean something like keeping the non-perfect attendae students in at recess or the like.

The elementary school my mother works at (and that my nieces attend...yes on special permission) does stuff like this. Conduct, attendance, reading beyond what is required, et cetera--all those will get special rewards, and parents don't biatch and moan. (Well, 99.9999% of parents don't complain. One did, but that's because she is a biatchy asshole.)

What the school in the story is saying is "Good job! Now see what being dedicated to what you're doing will get you? Reflect on this as you grow up."


Precisely. Not being rewarded does not equate being punished. Good grief. Some 6 years old got rewarded for something that is has been encouraged and, well, rewarded since school has been around -- good attendance. Back in the day, the reward was a certificate. Not getting a certificate didn't mean a child was being punished for less than good attendence. It meant he didn't earn the certificate. Better luck next time.
 
2014-02-12 04:09:54 AM  

swingerofbirches: First, yes, she is being shamed. Imagine you are an adult (presumably you are) an adult workplace, and you are forced to strip out of your clothes and given a uniform to wear unlike all other employees because of poor performance. It is a type of psychological abuse.

Second, a child isn't a "snowflake" because she has an advocate for her welfare in life. Would it be better if no one in her life cared that she was crying at school?

Third, this school is farking nuts. This reminds me of those idiot parents in waiting rooms who ask their kids to do 10 million things while sitting perfectly still and yell at the kid for not doing the 10 million things perfectly.

The school should be happy that this kid finally showed up! Showing up for school and "having good work habits" are 100% the domain of a parent when a kid is 6 years old. They should spend more time figuring out why the parent can't get the kid to school rather than playing these stupid games about which clothes to wear on which day and who gets to wear what! That's like the parent with 10 million rules in the waiting room. Why are they even in school? I wish I could fly these morons to Sweden and show them a day in the life of a Swedish elementary school. They are farking humanistic! It is so easy to be a good parent/teacher/caregiver, and yet people fark it up all the time!


So... the parents don't have to follow the rules? They are the ones who caused the girl to not be allowed to participate in the reward. They are the ones that sent the girl to school in regular clothes, knowing she had to be in uniform. Yet it is the school's fault?
 
2014-02-12 04:37:52 AM  

JSam21: swingerofbirches: First, yes, she is being shamed. Imagine you are an adult (presumably you are) an adult workplace, and you are forced to strip out of your clothes and given a uniform to wear unlike all other employees because of poor performance. It is a type of psychological abuse.

Second, a child isn't a "snowflake" because she has an advocate for her welfare in life. Would it be better if no one in her life cared that she was crying at school?

Third, this school is farking nuts. This reminds me of those idiot parents in waiting rooms who ask their kids to do 10 million things while sitting perfectly still and yell at the kid for not doing the 10 million things perfectly.

The school should be happy that this kid finally showed up! Showing up for school and "having good work habits" are 100% the domain of a parent when a kid is 6 years old. They should spend more time figuring out why the parent can't get the kid to school rather than playing these stupid games about which clothes to wear on which day and who gets to wear what! That's like the parent with 10 million rules in the waiting room. Why are they even in school? I wish I could fly these morons to Sweden and show them a day in the life of a Swedish elementary school. They are farking humanistic! It is so easy to be a good parent/teacher/caregiver, and yet people fark it up all the time!

So... the parents don't have to follow the rules? They are the ones who caused the girl to not be allowed to participate in the reward. They are the ones that sent the girl to school in regular clothes, knowing she had to be in uniform. Yet it is the school's fault?


For real.  Grandma should blame herself for 1. making her grand kid late enough times she didn't get an out of uniform day and 2. disregarding #1 and making the kid have to go to the office and change and be *traumatized*.

Everything in that article is grandma's fault (assuming there is no mom in this situation, which I got the impression there isn't).
 
2014-02-12 05:03:23 AM  

ThunderChicken: Soooo...  Let's just throw it all to the breeze and stop teaching kids that there are repercussions for their actions early in life.  Just let them do whatever they like and reward them the same as the kids that work for it.  I'm sure that will teach them all a really great lesson about how life really works and encourage them to work harder.


You know, every generation thinks the generation that comes after it is lazy and needs to get off their lawn, etc. But I have seen some truly horrifying things with the children my nephew goes to school with, not just special snowflakism, but things that you'd think would be really basic like parents not potty training them and letting them wear pull ups waaaaaaay past when they should unless they had a medical problem. I mean what the hell. There's got to be some kind of breaking point where can't let your kids be any less capable and responsible for anything without serious societal consequences. I feel bad for those kids, and to be fair, it's not their fault, it's their stupid ass parents who can't raise them properly. They are going to be farked when they grow up.
 
2014-02-12 05:24:53 AM  
The real question about Tuttle Elementary is whether or not their ducts are in order.
 
2014-02-12 05:29:37 AM  

NickelP: Everything in that article is grandma's fault (assuming there is no mom in this situation, which I got the impression there isn't).


I have a feeling that there is a mom but she's not around, most likely because she was raised by someone like grandma who has no parenting skills whatsoever.
 
2014-02-12 05:52:25 AM  
What I don't get is if uniforms are a positive thing, how can not wearing one be a positive reward?
Also, for children that age, attendance and tardiness are never their fault.  Rewarding or punishing someone for the behavior of someone else is never useful.
 
2014-02-12 05:53:03 AM  
www.dhresource.com

What's all this about school uniforms?
 
2014-02-12 06:00:36 AM  
Sure is a sensitive bunch in this thread today.  I was the kid in middle and high school that voted for uniforms.  I was poor and cut grass for my clothes money so going to uniforms would have saved me some significant money.  It's just clothes people.


Hopefully this tragic and traumatic event will motivate the grandmother to wake up 10 minutes early....oh the horrors of having to wear a uniform on non-uniform day!!!
 
2014-02-12 06:16:28 AM  
Okay, so we've heard from the FARKers who are just too goddamned tough because they didn't need parents and left home at three to be raised by a pack of wolves, and THAT is how parenting should be done, but I have to agree that in this instance, this is a bad policy. If the kid has attendance issues at that age, it's probably her parents' fault.
 
2014-02-12 06:22:48 AM  
This isn't the same thing as demanding a participation trophy. This is a parent outraged that their kid is being forced to wear a gold star. Which we all know hasn't turned out badly before
 
2014-02-12 06:24:15 AM  
And this thread is yet another confirmation for the reasoning behind "zero tolerance" policies and one-size-fits-all rules and regulations:  It's because no action by the administration, positive or negative will be regarded as the "correct" action by everyone that we get stupid (but "fair") implementations of policy.  There is basically nothing a school can do that wont get SOMEONE's panties in a bunch - the only real question is how far down the scale the response by the parent will be.

You put up with this same shiat year in and year out, a dozen phone calls every day about "WHY?!?!?"  Eventually all "celebrations" are cancelled because you can't leave someone out but others object to the inclusion for kids who didnt "earn" it..  All punishments become automatic for a given infraction because you can't play "favorites" or treat situation A different from situation B.  "We" basically have asked for the system we've gotten.

/a six year old is not
responsible for absences
 
2014-02-12 06:26:42 AM  
I was late all the time all through school because of narcolepsy that didn't get diagnosed until 4 years after graduating high school. My mom would dump water on my face, take all the blankets, scream, probably even slapped me some. Even took me in and had the principal and several other important people lecture me on the importance of being on time.

fark the school. If you want to encourage good attendance, find out why kids are missing. Trying to shame them only makes things worse.

Remember sobbing so hard I couldn't breathe on the way to school because I was so tired. I was seeing a shiatty doctor who called me a hypochondriac and my mother was just focused on the fact that I might get her in trouble.
 
2014-02-12 06:58:47 AM  
This is a dumb policy, butunless the kid has soem seriosu issues it is brought to a head because of bad parenting.
 
2014-02-12 07:07:32 AM  
Yeah.  Meanwhile in China and Japan......
 
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