If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(AZ Family)   If your 15-year-old son's room is a-rocking, don't come a-knocking. Unless you want to see a naked 34-year-old woman break her ankle jumping out of your son's second-story window   (azfamily.com) divider line 131
    More: Strange, Marana, San Tan Valley, bedroom window, Tim Gaffney  
•       •       •

20485 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Feb 2014 at 5:42 PM (45 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



131 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2014-02-11 06:40:21 PM  

Egalitarian: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.

She'll probably get stuck on the sex offender registry, for statutory rape of a minor. That's what I would do if I were the judge, 'cause fair's fair.

on a side-note, what is wrong with these adult women going after 15 year old boys?!? Ladies just go to a bar and snag an adult man, if you're that hard up.

\feminist


She wanted a 15-year-old boy who looks at her with bewilderment and treats their sex like its the best sec he's ever had, because face it its the only sex he has ever had. Young and wild is better than old and bitter any day.
 
2014-02-11 06:40:45 PM  

Egalitarian: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.

She'll probably get stuck on the sex offender registry, for statutory rape of a minor. That's what I would do if I were the judge, 'cause fair's fair.

on a side-note, what is wrong with these adult women going after 15 year old boys?!? Ladies just go to a bar and snag an adult man, if you're that hard up.

\feminist


It's the same reason people insist on buying a puppy, rather than adopting a shelter dog.  They want somebody they can train up and mold into their very own.
 
2014-02-11 06:42:13 PM  

23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.



Quite frankly I'm ok with this double standard. Has a dude ever really regretted and been traumatized by any sex, ever.
 
2014-02-11 06:42:38 PM  

lasercannon: Poor boy, however will he get over the trauma of being raped. We should make sure that this boy has the best psychiatrists to help him with his emotional problems and low self esteem as a result of this abuse


As he will suffer from this trauma for life, and he will be informed of this fact in the all of the followup therapy sessions.
 
2014-02-11 06:44:51 PM  

2wolves: The dirty thirties can be a wonderful time in a women's life.


No kidding.  Wifey is 33 and the times have been niiiiiiiiice for the past couple of years.

/cradle rob I did
 
2014-02-11 06:47:40 PM  
But soft, what leg through yonder window breaks?
It is the east, and Keri is on the run.
Arise, fair mum, and kill the envious moon,
Who is already sick and pale with grief
That thou, mom, art dat ass.
 
2014-02-11 06:51:25 PM  
Unless she's his teacher, she's got a lot of explaining to do.
 
2014-02-11 06:52:51 PM  
She looks like she has severe ankle pain in that mug shot.
 
2014-02-11 06:54:06 PM  

minuslars: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.


Quite frankly I'm ok with this double standard. Has a dude ever really regretted and been traumatized by any sex, ever.


Normally, I'm with you 100%.
But look at her picture, and tell me that isn't a sexual predator - they don't only come in "male", you know.
 
2014-02-11 06:55:04 PM  
CSB(?)

I was 16 working at Braum's and she was 23.  She told me she was 18 and, at 16, I would have stuck it in anything...hell, my dog was looking sexy at one point (no...I didn't).  Anyway, she came onto me, invited me back to her place and we had sex all night and then all the next day until I have a D&D/BBS gathering to get to.  She was my first.

Then I learned she was psycho.

During the course of our 14 month relationship (parents couldn't have cared less - fact,not emotional outpouring), she tried to have me have sex with her and her cousin (no...not hot), I caught her having sex with her best friend (female...hot as fark!), she introduced me to anal once and I didn't like it, watched porn together and so many other little things.

She and I were in bed when I heard the front door open and she started giggling.  "This should be fun," she said as she sat up.  Confused, of course, I asked her what's up and she told me, laughing the whole time, that her husband was back from overseas but "not to worry, he's got a broken foot so he can't catch you if you run!"

I jumped out that friggin' second story window and never looked back.
 
2014-02-11 06:56:45 PM  

minuslars: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.


Quite frankly I'm ok with this double standard. Has a dude ever really regretted and been traumatized by any sex, ever.


Yea,  probably a lot more often than you think.  A lot of times these situations come about from kids who are already a bit/lot messed up and this type of dysfunction is just an extension of that.

I'm not ok with a double standard but I am ok with minor/adult situations in some sort of family court so a judge(couselors etc) can decide if what the level of consent was and the mental state of those involved.  Arbitrary age limits is really stupid.
 
2014-02-11 07:00:09 PM  
Omar is not impressed.
 
2014-02-11 07:01:56 PM  

minuslars: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.


Quite frankly I'm ok with this double standard. Has a dude ever really regretted and been traumatized by any sex, ever.


Yes.
 
2014-02-11 07:05:26 PM  
Where is the petition to see her in full makeup and lingerie? I'm sorry but I can't judge her until I see that.
 
2014-02-11 07:06:16 PM  
Parkour!
 
2014-02-11 07:10:10 PM  
How come they didn't have second-story windows when I was 15?
 
2014-02-11 07:13:39 PM  
Heard Jammin' on the stereo...

assets-s3.rollingstone.com
 
2014-02-11 07:15:19 PM  

433: Was the mugshot camera two feet above her head?


Myspace angle.

/ didn't work
 
2014-02-11 07:19:56 PM  

IRQ12: minuslars: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.


Quite frankly I'm ok with this double standard. Has a dude ever really regretted and been traumatized by any sex, ever.

Yea,  probably a lot more often than you think.  A lot of times these situations come about from kids who are already a bit/lot messed up and this type of dysfunction is just an extension of that.

I'm not ok with a double standard but I am ok with minor/adult situations in some sort of family court so a judge(couselors etc) can decide if what the level of consent was and the mental state of those involved.  Arbitrary age limits is really stupid.


The ONLY standard that makes ANY sense is: Post Puberty - Anything Goes.

Yeah, if there's grass on the field, play ball.

Srsly. Maybe civil liability if a coercive power dynamic is present, but otherwise nature is as nature does. And it's not like this would benefit me at all. Not now anyway. But when I was in my teens, things...happened...a couple times with somewhat older and slightly youngers. Whatever. Once the hormones kick in, unless there's coercion, oh farking well. Deal with it. It's not like relationships magically become all easy at day 6206 of your life.
 
2014-02-11 07:20:58 PM  

skinink: "The teen said he and Gonzalez had sex twice that evening before his mother caught them in bed."
So, ten seconds of sex?


Ha, maybe the first time, but 15 minutes later, lasted for a good long time. (And that is what she said.)

The kid should have said "Mom, can't I masturbate without you bothering me? Are you some kind of pervert? Quit banging on my door."
 
2014-02-11 07:22:24 PM  

minuslars: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.


Quite frankly I'm ok with this double standard. Has a dude ever really regretted and been traumatized by any sex, ever.


Let me guess, you're a banjo player.
 
2014-02-11 07:22:52 PM  
She was in his room playing with his erector set. Not a single, a set.
 
2014-02-11 07:28:15 PM  

baconbeard: minuslars: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.


Quite frankly I'm ok with this double standard. Has a dude ever really regretted and been traumatized by any sex, ever.

Yes.


Whatevs. I'm late 30s and can be traumatized. Fact is, since I sprouted pubes, unless I'm coerced, it's my farking decision. So tough farking shiat you crypto-sex-facist.
 
2014-02-11 07:28:27 PM  
I approve.

Double standard? Yep!

*looks at picture*

Gah! I'm gonna guess the guy is no prize either though. When I was 15 I ha several friends my age who had slept with cute older women. Jealous to this day.
 
2014-02-11 07:32:16 PM  

WhoGAS: CSB(?)

I was 16 working at Braum's and she was 23.  She told me she was 18 and, at 16, I would have stuck it in anything...hell, my dog was looking sexy at one point (no...I didn't).  Anyway, she came onto me, invited me back to her place and we had sex all night and then all the next day until I have a D&D/BBS gathering to get to.  She was my first.

Then I learned she was psycho.

During the course of our 14 month relationship (parents couldn't have cared less - fact,not emotional outpouring), she tried to have me have sex with her and her cousin (no...not hot), I caught her having sex with her best friend (female...hot as fark!), she introduced me to anal once and I didn't like it, watched porn together and so many other little things.

She and I were in bed when I heard the front door open and she started giggling.  "This should be fun," she said as she sat up.  Confused, of course, I asked her what's up and she told me, laughing the whole time, that her husband was back from overseas but "not to worry, he's got a broken foot so he can't catch you if you run!"

I jumped out that friggin' second story window and never looked back.


Dear Penthouse Forum,

You're not going to believe this...

/do they still make Penthouse Forum? Who would read it?
 
2014-02-11 07:32:31 PM  
Thank you, God!
 
2014-02-11 07:35:24 PM  

minuslars: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.


Quite frankly I'm ok with this double standard. Has a dude ever really regretted and been traumatized by any sex, ever.


Incest, maybe situations when the male was really young, but a post-pubescent male, no std acquired and no pregnancy, regret can't be common.

Hell when I was 15 I thought about sex constantly and had the stamina to go twice a day every day of the week. Only problem was the only girl I knew how to get at the time was Rosy Palm.

If I knew then what I know now...
 
2014-02-11 07:37:17 PM  

WhoGAS: CSB(?)

I was 16 working at Braum's and she was 23.  She told me she was 18 and, at 16, I would have stuck it in anything...hell, my dog was looking sexy at one point (no...I didn't).  Anyway, she came onto me, invited me back to her place and we had sex all night and then all the next day until I have a D&D/BBS gathering to get to.  She was my first.

Then I learned she was psycho.

During the course of our 14 month relationship (parents couldn't have cared less - fact,not emotional outpouring), she tried to have me have sex with her and her cousin (no...not hot), I caught her having sex with her best friend (female...hot as fark!), she introduced me to anal once and I didn't like it, watched porn together and so many other little things.

She and I were in bed when I heard the front door open and she started giggling.  "This should be fun," she said as she sat up.  Confused, of course, I asked her what's up and she told me, laughing the whole time, that her husband was back from overseas but "not to worry, he's got a broken foot so he can't catch you if you run!"

I jumped out that friggin' second story window and never looked back.


fap fap fap
 
2014-02-11 07:38:08 PM  
And yet not one peep about having to swear under oath that you didn't reduce headcount due to OobamaCare.  At some point, wiberals need to be honest with themselves and this moran that THEY elected TWICE!!!!! Unfarking believable!!!

http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2014/02/11/thought-police-firms-must- s wear-obamacare-not-factor-in-firings/
 
2014-02-11 07:38:17 PM  

James10952001: I approve.


dl.dropboxusercontent.com

...We looking at the same picture here, or what?

/Thats a rough 34.
 
2014-02-11 07:39:38 PM  

way south: James10952001: I approve.

[dl.dropboxusercontent.com image 365x522]

...We looking at the same picture here, or what?

/Thats a rough Rule34.

 
2014-02-11 07:39:51 PM  

Nick Nostril: 433: Was the mugshot camera two feet above her head?

Myspace angle.

/ didn't work


I learned to avoid those real quick back when I first discovered online dating, when that went semi mainstream it was a godsend for socially awkward geek guys. We could finally get laid semi regularly.
 
2014-02-11 07:43:52 PM  

Serious Post on Serious Thread: IRQ12: minuslars: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.


Quite frankly I'm ok with this double standard. Has a dude ever really regretted and been traumatized by any sex, ever.

Yea,  probably a lot more often than you think.  A lot of times these situations come about from kids who are already a bit/lot messed up and this type of dysfunction is just an extension of that.

I'm not ok with a double standard but I am ok with minor/adult situations in some sort of family court so a judge(couselors etc) can decide if what the level of consent was and the mental state of those involved.  Arbitrary age limits is really stupid.

The ONLY standard that makes ANY sense is: Post Puberty - Anything Goes.

Yeah, if there's grass on the field, play ball.

Srsly. Maybe civil liability if a coercive power dynamic is present, but otherwise nature is as nature does. And it's not like this would benefit me at all. Not now anyway. But when I was in my teens, things...happened...a couple times with somewhat older and slightly youngers. Whatever. Once the hormones kick in, unless there's coercion, oh farking well. Deal with it. It's not like relationships magically become all easy at day 6206 of your life.


I've come to the conclusion that most people are technically sex offenders even though most never got caught. Isn't the average age of losing one's virginity in the mid teens in most developed nations? In a lot of states it's a crime if one is 17 and one is 18 and what teenager stops having sex the day their partner turns 18?
 
2014-02-11 07:50:52 PM  

way south: James10952001: I approve.



...We looking at the same picture here, or what?

/Thats a rough 34.


I typed the first part before looking at the picture.

Not my bag, but I've seen plenty of people willingly sleep with some naaaaaassty people. Ever seen Maury? I catch snippets of that once in a while and I'm usually like dude, you hooked up with *that*? And you admitted to it in TV?

*shrug* I wouldn't fark her with a stolen dick, but I have a hard time believing the guy wasn't willing. Hell when I was a horny teenager my standards may have sunk tat low if it meant getting laid.

Looking back, I don't regret a single lay I had. I do regret a number of missed opportunities though.
 
2014-02-11 07:51:04 PM  

brap: But soft, what leg through yonder window breaks?
It is the east, and Keri is on the run.
Arise, fair mum, and kill the envious moon,
Who is already sick and pale with grief
That thou, mom, art dat ass.


I award you all the internets.
 
2014-02-11 07:52:35 PM  
I see it in every one of these threads. People wondering why they had to bang a teen when all they had to do is go to any bar to find plenty of adults if she wanted to bang.

You don't get it do you?
It isn't just about the sex.

It is about the thrill of the forbidden.

It is about instant boners.

The fact that most people are in the best shape of their lives in their teens.

Of course, some of these predators are mental.

They can't have a relationship with adults.

They have <ISSUES>
 
2014-02-11 07:53:06 PM  
She probably has a lovely voice with smoking for 20 years straight.
 
2014-02-11 07:56:15 PM  

lasercannon: Poor boy, however will he get over the trauma of being raped. We should make sure that this boy has the best psychiatrists to help him with his emotional problems and low self esteem as a result of this abuse


s21.postimg.org
One of the best.
 
2014-02-11 07:58:46 PM  

WhoGAS: CSB(?)

I was 16 working at Braum's and she was 23.  She told me she was 18 and, at 16, I would have stuck it in anything...hell, my dog was looking sexy at one point (no...I didn't).  Anyway, she came onto me, invited me back to her place and we had sex all night and then all the next day until I have a D&D/BBS gathering to get to.  She was my first.

Then I learned she was psycho.

During the course of our 14 month relationship (parents couldn't have cared less - fact,not emotional outpouring), she tried to have me have sex with her and her cousin (no...not hot), I caught her having sex with her best friend (female...hot as fark!), she introduced me to anal once and I didn't like it, watched porn together and so many other little things.

She and I were in bed when I heard the front door open and she started giggling.  "This should be fun," she said as she sat up.  Confused, of course, I asked her what's up and she told me, laughing the whole time, that her husband was back from overseas but "not to worry, he's got a broken foot so he can't catch you if you run!"

I jumped out that friggin' second story window and never looked back.



Why didn't you like it? Did she go in dry?
 
2014-02-11 07:59:22 PM  

InterruptingQuirk: lasercannon: Poor boy, however will he get over the trauma of being raped. We should make sure that this boy has the best psychiatrists to help him with his emotional problems and low self esteem as a result of this abuse

As he will suffer from this trauma for life, and he will be informed of this fact in the all of the followup therapy sessions.


Yup.

How do you traumatize a kid?
Tell them repeatedly and with a lot of emotion that they're traumatized.
 
2014-02-11 07:59:48 PM  

Lord Farkwad: Why didn't you like it? Did she go in dry?


Nah.  Soap and water.

Figured if she wanted me to do her anally, it's just not fair to ask someone to do something you wouldn't do yourself.  Just respectful, ya see.
 
2014-02-11 08:03:10 PM  

The_Philosopher_King: I see it in every one of these threads. People wondering why they had to bang a teen when all they had to do is go to any bar to find plenty of adults if she wanted to bang.

You don't get it do you?
It isn't just about the sex.

It is about the thrill of the forbidden.

It is about instant boners.

The fact that most people are in the best shape of their lives in their teens.

Of course, some of these predators are mental.

They can't have a relationship with adults.

They have <ISSUES>


"That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age."

/ Too old to get away with that anymore even if I was single.

/ Still looks.
 
2014-02-11 08:05:01 PM  

James10952001:  Isn't the average age of losing one's virginity in the mid teens in most developed nations?


17 us/europe
18-19 asia
 
2014-02-11 08:11:05 PM  

Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: InterruptingQuirk: lasercannon: Poor boy, however will he get over the trauma of being raped. We should make sure that this boy has the best psychiatrists to help him with his emotional problems and low self esteem as a result of this abuse

As he will suffer from this trauma for life, and he will be informed of this fact in the all of the followup therapy sessions.

Yup.

How do you traumatize a kid?
Tell them repeatedly and with a lot of emotion that they're traumatized.


I submitted a story recently (that the mods promptly nuked) about a 16 yr old boy that was caught in bed with his teacher
. Poor bastard wasn't raised by American standards of prudery and was suicidal over the guilt of her going to jail. He was in love with her and traumatised by being told that he had been abused.
His adoptive mother was quoted as saying he just didn't understand how he had been taken advantage of, but someday he would understand.
In the meantime there were shrinks and social workers to f*ck him up morehelp him..
 
2014-02-11 08:13:26 PM  

JoieD'Zen: Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: InterruptingQuirk: lasercannon: Poor boy, however will he get over the trauma of being raped. We should make sure that this boy has the best psychiatrists to help him with his emotional problems and low self esteem as a result of this abuse

As he will suffer from this trauma for life, and he will be informed of this fact in the all of the followup therapy sessions.

Yup.

How do you traumatize a kid?
Tell them repeatedly and with a lot of emotion that they're traumatized.

I submitted a story recently (that the mods promptly nuked) about a 16 yr old boy that was caught in bed with his teacher
. Poor bastard wasn't raised by American standards of prudery and was suicidal over the guilt of her going to jail. He was in love with her and traumatised by being told that he had been abused.
His adoptive mother was quoted as saying he just didn't understand how he had been taken advantage of, but someday he would understand.
In the meantime there were shrinks and social workers to f*ck him up morehelp him..


I get the feeling a lot of farked up abused people go on to become shrinks, then project their own damage into others they consider abused. I have no data to back this up though so take it with a grain of salt.
 
2014-02-11 08:21:44 PM  
When and why did women jump on the pedo band wagon? Jebus jumping Christ, what could POSSIBLY be sexually enticing about a 15-year old?
 
2014-02-11 08:25:51 PM  

minuslars: 23FPB23: Sexual Misconduct with a Minor? Seems....reasonable, actually.

Why wasn't she charged with RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPE!

Oh I get it, wrong gender arrangement.


Quite frankly I'm ok with this double standard. Has a dude ever really regretted and been traumatized by any sex, ever.


Regretted, yes.  Traumatized no, but only because I'm STD free.  I know the stereotype of guys always wanting it and having no standards is funny and whatnot, hell I love cracking those jokes.  But this doesn't read like a joke.  Once you hit college and beyond, it's not particularly difficult to find someone willing to have sex with you, as long as you're not a jackass.  That's why I'm only a virgin online.
 
2014-02-11 08:32:20 PM  

Astorix: Why would a 34 year old want to bang a 15 year old?


Control
 
2014-02-11 08:32:56 PM  
James10952001:

I get the feeling a lot of farked up abused people go on to become shrinks, then project their own damage into others they consider abused. I have no data to back this up though so take it with a grain of salt.

My sister in law is a therapist (not a shrink), and she's one of the most farked up people I know.

I can't believe people go to her.  If they had any idea what a mess she is they'd go running for the hills.
 
2014-02-11 08:33:18 PM  

phenn: When and why did women jump on the pedo band wagon? Jebus jumping Christ, what could POSSIBLY be sexually enticing about a 15-year old?


What could possibly be enticing about all sorts of stuff that turns people on? Bandwagon? This stuff has been going in forever. The difference is technology we have today tends to leave a digital trail. This case is an exception, but most of the others you hear about were caught due to text messages and phone pics.
 
Displayed 50 of 131 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report