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(Plymouth Herald)   Cat disappears for three years, comes back fatter. Meat pie factory denies knowledge, or fattening cat up for new savoury filling   (plymouthherald.co.uk) divider line 46
    More: Unlikely, Johnny Knoxville, cats  
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4844 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Feb 2014 at 10:39 AM (22 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



46 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-02-05 09:23:15 AM
static2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2014-02-05 10:40:25 AM
Boomer lives!
 
2014-02-05 10:41:56 AM
The moggie - called Woosie...

Is this a Harry Potter story?
 
2014-02-05 10:44:26 AM
A man that has never had a pasty is a shameful man
 
2014-02-05 10:45:52 AM
Wait... pasty, like the things strippers sometimes wear on their nips?

That article says pasty, not pastry (which i had misread due in part to thinking how easy it would be for a cat to get fat in a pastry factory).  This gives a new meaning to "Ginsters pie and pasty plant." as the article calls the business.   Think about that, then look at the woman in the article's photo....

Eeeeeeww!!!!
 
2014-02-05 10:46:35 AM
King Robert:  I'm not feeling good.
Ned:  Cause we should not have eaten kitten meat.
Robert:  Poor babies.
 
2014-02-05 10:47:06 AM
"G-d that's good!"

www.aceshowbiz.com
 
2014-02-05 10:47:45 AM

Isn't it a dick move to not go to the vet ASAP and look for a microchip when you find a "stray" in today's world?

A spokesperson said: "As you would expect from a food manufacturer, we have very strict procedures to ensure that stray animals do not venture into the perimeter of our premises at any time.


i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-05 10:48:06 AM
Cats own the world.  Humans are just squatters that they tolerate for the food.
 
2014-02-05 10:49:02 AM
It was probably found and kept by a neighbor before escaping again and finding its way back.
 
2014-02-05 10:57:59 AM
Can we make this a fat cat thread please?
 
2014-02-05 10:59:07 AM
i280.photobucket.com
 
2014-02-05 11:04:02 AM
news.bbcimg.co.uk

Meow!
 
2014-02-05 11:06:42 AM
Appropriate at this time:   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oW9f04Dctz4
 
2014-02-05 11:09:21 AM

Barry Lyndon's Annuity Cheque: Boomer lives!


should have locked the damn gates.
 
2014-02-05 11:14:47 AM
Mmmmm...edible pasties, with a side of moggie.

Get on with your bad self Britain.
 
2014-02-05 11:15:20 AM
titbits and pasties.

Good times.
 
2014-02-05 11:16:28 AM
MY CAY DISAPPEARED THREE YEARS AGO AND NOW HE JUST CAME BACK!!!!! He is fatter now! And taller! And black instead of white! And has become a dog! Wait...
 
2014-02-05 11:19:42 AM

Hardy-r-r: [i280.photobucket.com image 850x812]


I have this cartoon on a mug! Love Kliban's cats!!
 
2014-02-05 11:21:54 AM
Cat roams as cats do, cat finds better place to live with lots of fattening food, cat decides to live there. Cat is found out and eventually sent home. Ladies and gentlemen, this is what we call the news.
 
2014-02-05 11:22:46 AM

IronJelly: Wait... pasty, like the things strippers sometimes wear on their nips?

That article says pasty, not pastry (which i had misread due in part to thinking how easy it would be for a cat to get fat in a pastry factory).  This gives a new meaning to "Ginsters pie and pasty plant." as the article calls the business.   Think about that, then look at the woman in the article's photo....

Eeeeeeww!!!!


http://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/158619/Why-it-s-a-Welsh-not-Cornish -p asty
 
2014-02-05 11:22:48 AM
There is enough English slang in that article that they made me forget what they were writing about.

Blimey!
 
2014-02-05 11:24:52 AM
"I was gobsmacked. We never expected to see him again, not after he'd been missing for three years."

Someone needs to smack her in the gob.  Damned pasty-eating British folk.
 
2014-02-05 11:29:37 AM
After watching "Chicken Run" with my brother and sister, we IMMEDIATELY ran out to the store to purchase and subsequently eat chicken pot pies. We found this hilarious.

/got nuthin'
 
2014-02-05 11:30:30 AM
Did they think he was a goner?
 
2014-02-05 11:38:08 AM

FullMetalPanda: Can we make this a fat cat thread please?


♫ The fat Cat knows he's a company man ♪

/possibly obscure.
 
2014-02-05 11:42:18 AM

IronJelly: Wait... pasty, like the things strippers sometimes wear on their nips?

That article says pasty, not pastry (which i had misread due in part to thinking how easy it would be for a cat to get fat in a pastry factory).  This gives a new meaning to "Ginsters pie and pasty plant." as the article calls the business.   Think about that, then look at the woman in the article's photo....

Eeeeeeww!!!!


A pasty is a Dutch pocket pie, usually with a savory filling.

Sorry for killing the joke.
 
2014-02-05 11:42:52 AM
Did someone say meat pie?

www.crazytownblog.com

/Try the priest
 
2014-02-05 11:43:30 AM

HeartBurnKid: IronJelly: Wait... pasty, like the things strippers sometimes wear on their nips?

That article says pasty, not pastry (which i had misread due in part to thinking how easy it would be for a cat to get fat in a pastry factory).  This gives a new meaning to "Ginsters pie and pasty plant." as the article calls the business.   Think about that, then look at the woman in the article's photo....

Eeeeeeww!!!!

A pasty is a Dutch pocket pie, usually with a savory filling.

Sorry for killing the joke.


Dutch? Dutch? Try Cornish.
 
2014-02-05 11:43:33 AM

HeartBurnKid: IronJelly: Wait... pasty, like the things strippers sometimes wear on their nips?

That article says pasty, not pastry (which i had misread due in part to thinking how easy it would be for a cat to get fat in a pastry factory).  This gives a new meaning to "Ginsters pie and pasty plant." as the article calls the business.   Think about that, then look at the woman in the article's photo....

Eeeeeeww!!!!

A pasty is a Dutch pocket pie, usually with a savory filling.

Sorry for killing the joke.


Excuse me, Welsh, not Dutch.

/need caffeine
 
2014-02-05 11:44:52 AM

HeartBurnKid: HeartBurnKid: IronJelly: Wait... pasty, like the things strippers sometimes wear on their nips?

That article says pasty, not pastry (which i had misread due in part to thinking how easy it would be for a cat to get fat in a pastry factory).  This gives a new meaning to "Ginsters pie and pasty plant." as the article calls the business.   Think about that, then look at the woman in the article's photo....

Eeeeeeww!!!!

A pasty is a Dutch pocket pie, usually with a savory filling.

Sorry for killing the joke.

Excuse me, Welsh, not Dutch.

/need caffeine


Ball two, high and out of the zone.
 
2014-02-05 11:48:22 AM
Someone needs to link Kevin Bloody Wilson's "That f*ckin cat's back"

/stoopid phone no good for linkies
 
2014-02-05 11:59:32 AM

There's Always A Bloody Ghost: IronJelly: Wait... pasty, like the things strippers sometimes wear on their nips?

That article says pasty, not pastry (which i had misread due in part to thinking how easy it would be for a cat to get fat in a pastry factory).  This gives a new meaning to "Ginsters pie and pasty plant." as the article calls the business.   Think about that, then look at the woman in the article's photo....

Eeeeeeww!!!!

http://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/158619/Why-it-s-a-Welsh-not-Cornish -p asty


I see this has been taken care of.  Very good then.

/Also, the pastry pasty is pronounced "pass-tee", not "pays-tee" like the things strippers wear on their nipples.

putitinyourface.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-02-05 12:09:54 PM

HortusMatris: There's Always A Bloody Ghost: IronJelly: Wait... pasty, like the things strippers sometimes wear on their nips?

That article says pasty, not pastry (which i had misread due in part to thinking how easy it would be for a cat to get fat in a pastry factory).  This gives a new meaning to "Ginsters pie and pasty plant." as the article calls the business.   Think about that, then look at the woman in the article's photo....

Eeeeeeww!!!!

http://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/158619/Why-it-s-a-Welsh-not-Cornish -p asty

I see this has been taken care of.  Very good then.

/Also, the pastry pasty is pronounced "pass-tee", not "pays-tee" like the things strippers wear on their nipples.

[putitinyourface.files.wordpress.com image 228x151]


The stripper one is also spelled "Pastie."  I just wanted to make an amusing comment.  Never heard of the meat pies (giggity) though.
 
2014-02-05 12:13:14 PM

mbillips: Did someone say meat pie?

[www.crazytownblog.com image 300x435]

/Try the priest


That was an awesome movie, but so SO gory...  Liked it anyway.
 
2014-02-05 12:17:19 PM

nullptr: Isn't it a dick move to not go to the vet ASAP and look for a microchip when you find a "stray" in today's world?

A spokesperson said: "As you would expect from a food manufacturer, we have very strict procedures to ensure that stray animals do not venture into the perimeter of our premises at any time.

[i.imgur.com image 300x292]


For a dog, yes.  For a cat.....it doesn't really like you anyway.  (not you, but you)
 
2014-02-05 12:38:06 PM
moggie??? wtf, England?!?

/it's like those English have a different word for everything
 
2014-02-05 12:41:19 PM
Speaking of animals that you really cannot catch running free in warehouse environments...

I used to work for a tropical fish wholesaler (kinda like a staging ground for pet stores.)
There were at least 2 turtles, some african frogs, and one very large tokay gecko running around in there.  No one could catch them.  They lived off of whatever fell out of, or escaped from, tanks in the warehouse.
The turtles were enormously fat slobs.
 
2014-02-05 12:41:19 PM

HortusMatris: There's Always A Bloody Ghost: IronJelly: Wait... pasty, like the things strippers sometimes wear on their nips?

That article says pasty, not pastry (which i had misread due in part to thinking how easy it would be for a cat to get fat in a pastry factory).  This gives a new meaning to "Ginsters pie and pasty plant." as the article calls the business.   Think about that, then look at the woman in the article's photo....

Eeeeeeww!!!!

http://www.express.co.uk/news/uk/158619/Why-it-s-a-Welsh-not-Cornish -p asty

I see this has been taken care of.  Very good then.

/Also, the pastry pasty is pronounced "pass-tee", not "pays-tee" like the things strippers wear on their nipples.


But do they do the nastee?
 
2014-02-05 12:43:56 PM

durbnpoisn: Speaking of animals that you really cannot catch running free in warehouse environments...

I used to work for a tropical fish wholesaler (kinda like a staging ground for pet stores.)
There were at least 2 turtles, some african frogs, and one very large tokay gecko running around in there.  No one could catch them.  They lived off of whatever fell out of, or escaped from, tanks in the warehouse.
The turtles were enormously fat slobs.


The guys that couldn't catch them must have been en too.
 
2014-02-05 12:49:30 PM

Fano: durbnpoisn: Speaking of animals that you really cannot catch running free in warehouse environments...

I used to work for a tropical fish wholesaler (kinda like a staging ground for pet stores.)
There were at least 2 turtles, some african frogs, and one very large tokay gecko running around in there.  No one could catch them.  They lived off of whatever fell out of, or escaped from, tanks in the warehouse.
The turtles were enormously fat slobs.

The guys that couldn't catch them must have been en too.


The problem was not that they were too fast, or anything hyper impossible like that.  It was because they were always in areas that were completely inaccessible to anything the size of a human.  You could see them.  You just couldn't get to them.
Well, except the gecko.  That thing would tear your arm off if you tried to get near it.
 
2014-02-05 01:00:34 PM
What a fat cat may look like:

i.imgur.com
 
2014-02-05 01:01:34 PM
i1.ytimg.com
 
2014-02-05 04:05:31 PM

reillan: [i1.ytimg.com image 480x360]


Les Miseranimals

/definitely
 
2014-02-05 05:29:17 PM
Came for the Sweeney Todd references, leaving as satisfied as if I tried the priest.

/Them pussycats is quick
 
2014-02-05 08:38:11 PM
Quick and dirty translation to English.

pasty = pot pie, folded in half
moggie = dimunitive form of mog, kittie
canny = shrewd
gobsmacked = dumbfounded
titbits = small snacks
Lord Muck = "being treated like a king"
lorry = tractor trailer
 
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