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(Mental Healthy)   'Compulsion Orgasmic' is a condition characterized by the near-constant desire to achieve orgasm - Also known as being a guy   (mentalhealthy.co.uk) divider line 44
    More: Interesting, Woman wins, psychological pain, orgasms  
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3319 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Feb 2014 at 7:05 AM (25 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



44 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-02-05 06:34:29 AM
All jokes aside, a court really approved this? Since when does the employer not have the right to set and enforce basic policy?

I realize this happened in another country, but to tell a company they have to allow an employee to engage in sexually explicit behavior, is just...wtf.
 
2014-02-05 06:45:54 AM
She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.
 
2014-02-05 07:22:14 AM

EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.


Yes it will, carpal tunnel... I mean it's a repetitive task right?  Next she'll probably demand a helper monkey or dog to lick her off since she can't do it herself.
 
2014-02-05 07:23:31 AM

strangeluck: All jokes aside, a court really approved this? Since when does the employer not have the right to set and enforce basic policy?

I realize this happened in another country, but to tell a company they have to allow an employee to engage in sexually explicit behavior, is just...wtf.


Because Fairness.  We're all the same, remember?
 
2014-02-05 07:23:53 AM

EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.


No, but they will have to pay for all the porn she's allowed to watch.

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?

i109.photobucket.com

/well, if a considerable quantity of alcohol is involved, I might
 
2014-02-05 07:24:06 AM
Pics or it didn't happen
 
2014-02-05 07:24:46 AM

EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.


Masturbation is a gateway. Next thing she'll be doing is having sex with her coworkers every 2 hours for 15 minutes.
 
2014-02-05 07:26:20 AM
There are probably lots of men with this exact issue, but since they only need 30 seconds every two hours, the impact on productivity is less.
 
2014-02-05 07:26:53 AM
I just spent like $900 signing up to every online dating site I could find and searching for "compulsion orgasmic."

What a waste of time. Online dating is bullsh*t.
 
2014-02-05 07:30:35 AM

TinyFist: I just spent like $900 signing up to every online dating site I could find and searching for "compulsion orgasmic."

What a waste of time. Online dating is bullsh*t.


That's because they're too busy masturbating to date.
 
2014-02-05 07:33:06 AM
Old news is old.

KStDrew: Who's gonna bang this?


At closing time, just about anyone.
 
2014-02-05 07:33:33 AM

TinyFist: I just spent like $900 signing up to every online dating site I could find and searching for "compulsion orgasmic."

What a waste of time. Online dating is bullsh*t.


What feeling compelled might look like (NSFW)
 
2014-02-05 07:33:48 AM

KStDrew: EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.

No, but they will have to pay for all the porn she's allowed to watch.

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?

[i109.photobucket.com image 400x232]

/well, if a considerable quantity of alcohol is involved, I might


That picture doesn't show if her knees are too sharp or not...
 
2014-02-05 07:33:59 AM
KStDrew:

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?

i290.photobucket.com
 
2014-02-05 07:36:11 AM

KStDrew: EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.

No, but they will have to pay for all the porn she's allowed to watch.

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?



/well, if a considerable quantity of alcohol is involved, I might


GAH
 
2014-02-05 07:43:06 AM

UNC_Samurai: TinyFist: I just spent like $900 signing up to every online dating site I could find and searching for "compulsion orgasmic."

What a waste of time. Online dating is bullsh*t.

What feeling compelled might look like (NSFW)


That... that seems like the worst possible way anyone could ever surf porn in the history of forever.

*tiny tab*

*clicks tab*

opens one pic.

"NICE!"

"okay,now back up one page..."

Scroll down,

*clicks tab*

Opens one pic...

This is f*cking retarded.

THAT'S A BAD Samuria!!! BAD!!!

*Swats  Samuria with a rolled up newspaper*
 
2014-02-05 07:45:06 AM

KStDrew: EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.

No, but they will have to pay for all the porn she's allowed to watch.

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?

[i109.photobucket.com image 400x232]

/well, if a considerable quantity of alcohol is involved, I might


She's not THAT bad looking.
 
2014-02-05 07:45:57 AM
This story just goes to show how hypersexualized Americans are today and why I refuse to pay for this woman's birth control.
Next thing the court is going to garnish my wages to pay for her dirty lifestyle and force me to pay back child support.  This is the fault of Liberals!
 
2014-02-05 07:47:19 AM
It doesn't surprise me that this is a woman in her 30s. Those dirty thirties are a fun time!
 
2014-02-05 07:47:36 AM

TinyFist: UNC_Samurai: TinyFist: I just spent like $900 signing up to every online dating site I could find and searching for "compulsion orgasmic."

What a waste of time. Online dating is bullsh*t.

What feeling compelled might look like (NSFW)

That... that seems like the worst possible way anyone could ever surf porn in the history of forever.

*tiny tab*

*clicks tab*

opens one pic.

"NICE!"

"okay,now back up one page..."

Scroll down,

*clicks tab*

Opens one pic...

This is f*cking retarded.

THAT'S A BAD Samuria!!! BAD!!!

*Swats  Samuria with a rolled up newspaper*


Dammit, I forget that not everyone has RES installed. There's a handy "open all images" button that opens them on the page.

/they're also almost all imgur links, which means you don't have to worry about your malware detectors going crazy
 
2014-02-05 07:48:02 AM

fredbox: KStDrew:

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?

[i290.photobucket.com image 608x480]


Really? You're gonna use that for this? Damn. We can do the limbo with how low you've set the bar.
 
2014-02-05 08:03:27 AM

swahnhennessy: fredbox: KStDrew:

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?

[i290.photobucket.com image 608x480]

Really? You're gonna use that for this? Damn. We can do the limbo with how low you've set the bar.


I thought it was an appropriate use.  She was certainly bangable.
 
2014-02-05 08:06:20 AM

EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.


Wait until the tea party finds out that masturbation breaks are part of Obamacare.
 
2014-02-05 08:10:15 AM
I saw Compulsion Orgasmic open for The Talking Heads in Leeds back in '95.
 
2014-02-05 08:12:48 AM
 
2014-02-05 08:14:54 AM

swahnhennessy: fredbox: KStDrew:

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?

[i290.photobucket.com image 608x480]

Really? You're gonna use that for this? Damn. We can do the limbo with how low you've set the bar.


I see you posted this about 26 minutes ago. Any line for the treadmill?
 
2014-02-05 08:18:01 AM
Well it would be faster for her to just bang all the guys in the office instead.
 
2014-02-05 08:21:25 AM

Thisbymaster: Well it would be faster for her to just bang all the guys in the office instead.


Sadly it didn't work for her:

[very NSFW] http://news.bme.com/2006/10/28/michelle-the-pass-around-girl-the-publ i shers-ring/
 
2014-02-05 08:52:08 AM
Or as Farkers call it: a typical Wednesday.

BRB
 
2014-02-05 09:35:10 AM
How did Fark mods let slip an ancient hoax that Huff reported three years ago?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/05/16/ana-catarian-bezerra-legall y- masturbate-at-work_n_862452.html
 
2014-02-05 09:44:26 AM

KStDrew: EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

/well, if a considerable quantity of alcohol is involved, I might


First:
3.bp.blogspot.com

Second, line starts on the left:
www.themeparkreview.com
 
2014-02-05 10:54:28 AM
Thank goodness my wife is safe from this terrible illness.
 
2014-02-05 11:07:40 AM
I take it hand sanitizer frequents that office
 
2014-02-05 11:15:02 AM
Just give her some vibrating panties, she can get off when ever she wants without touching her twat.
 
2014-02-05 11:50:17 AM

lake_huron: There are probably lots of men with this exact issue, but since they only need 30 seconds every two hours, the impact on productivity is less.


You're forgetting clean up time and the increased costs in tissues and hand lotion.
 
2014-02-05 12:17:27 PM

KyDave: Thank goodness my wife is safe from this terrible illness.


I was going to say, doctors should prescribe her a husband. That'll kill her desire pretty quickly.
 
2014-02-05 12:59:50 PM

Keeve: KyDave: Thank goodness my wife is safe from this terrible illness.

I was going to say, doctors should prescribe her a husband. That'll kill her desire pretty quickly.


Marriage: the Cure for Sextm
 
2014-02-05 03:04:47 PM

Skleenar: This story just goes to show how hypersexualized Americans are today and why I refuse to pay for this woman's birth control.
Next thing the court is going to garnish my wages to pay for her dirty lifestyle and force me to pay back child support.  This is the fault of Liberals!


This is an old story from Brazil and in a Brizillian court, so your comment seem, I don't know, kind of silly. Link from 2011: Ana Catarian Bezerra, Brazilian Woman, Legally Entitled To Masturbate At Work.
 
2014-02-05 03:14:14 PM

FullMetalPanda: EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.

Yes it will, carpal tunnel... I mean it's a repetitive task right?  Next she'll probably demand a helper monkey or dog to lick her off since she can't do it herself.


Just hook up a web cam to her computer.
set to PPV.
Proffit.
 
2014-02-05 04:15:19 PM

KStDrew: EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.

No, but they will have to pay for all the porn she's allowed to watch.

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?



/well, if a considerable quantity of alcohol is involved, I might


Here's some wise advice from a guy who learned the hard way:
.
A girl who has a healthy sex drive, even if she's a 4, is worth WAAY MORE than a girl who takes an hour of prep and is an 8.
.
Way more.
 
2014-02-05 04:28:31 PM

Colin O'Scopy: KStDrew: EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.

No, but they will have to pay for all the porn she's allowed to watch.

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?

/well, if a considerable quantity of alcohol is involved, I might

Here's some wise advice from a guy who learned the hard way:
.
A girl who has a healthy sex drive, even if she's a 4, is worth WAAY MORE than a girl who takes an hour of prep and is an 8.
.
Way more.


You tell em!

Als, I can only imagine her description of symptoms being the exact same as a guy explaining it to his teen girlfriend.
 
2014-02-05 05:08:36 PM
4 times a day at work?

I could handle that, so to speak.
 
2014-02-05 08:56:42 PM

KStDrew: EvilEgg: She is said to need to masturbate for at least fifteen minutes every two hours.

If the smokers can take this much time off, why not her? They have their addictions, she has hers. And hers won't cost the company in increased insurance premiums.

No, but they will have to pay for all the porn she's allowed to watch.

Seriously, she has no other chance but to masturbate. Who's gonna bang this?

[i109.photobucket.com image 400x232]

/well, if a considerable quantity of alcohol is involved, I might


confusedDog.jpg
 
2014-02-06 05:30:13 PM

Colin O'Scopy: A girl who has a healthy sex drive, even if she's a 4, is worth WAAY MORE than a girl who takes an hour of prep and is an 8.


The real solution is two 4s.
 
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