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(Huffington Post)   'Try Not Having Kids' Parody Video is sure to start a healthy free exchange of ideas   (huffingtonpost.com) divider line 78
    More: Amusing, parody  
•       •       •

4554 clicks; posted to Video » on 04 Feb 2014 at 2:03 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



78 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-02-04 01:56:52 PM  
I don't see what anyone on either side of the fence could find particularly objectionable about this video.
 
2014-02-04 02:15:47 PM  
Truth hurts.
 
2014-02-04 02:22:17 PM  
I have kids and thought it was funny. Who gets butthurt by parody videos?
 
2014-02-04 02:41:32 PM  

Surly U. Jest: I have kids and thought it was funny. Who gets butthurt by parody videos?


people with no sense of humor or people who think they are real and not satire.
 
2014-02-04 02:57:06 PM  
It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.
 
2014-02-04 02:59:51 PM  
5/10 sorta funny.

/too many farkin people in the world.   it's a good alternative.
 
2014-02-04 03:01:44 PM  
I saw a sappy facebook photopost that said something like 'you can't make a healthy child without a mother' or some sappy crap like that. so I responded.

'You also need a mother-farker'
 
2014-02-04 03:02:43 PM  

Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.


My favorite comment is the one accusing the childless of being selfish for not having kids and perpetuating their genes.  Because _that_ makes sense.
 
2014-02-04 03:03:16 PM  
www.hecklerspray.com
"If I don't have kids, how am I supposed to find someone to have sex with?"
 
2014-02-04 03:04:50 PM  
I'm on the fence.

On the one hand, I think the world would be a better place if about 80% of Americans didn't reproduce.

On the other hand, I naively believe that I will be able to collect Social Security benefits when I retire in 20 years, as long as everyone keeps having kids.
 
2014-02-04 03:10:22 PM  

Surly U. Jest: I have kids and thought it was funny. Who gets butthurt by parody videos?


People who suspect their happiness at having kids is actually chemically enforced by the body, and that they actually regret having the little shiats.
 
2014-02-04 03:12:44 PM  
Heck, if there's anything wrong with the video, its they didn't sell the job/benefits of not having kids enough and spent too much time dwelling on the negatives.
 
2014-02-04 03:19:12 PM  

ShawnDoc: Heck, if there's anything wrong with the video, its they didn't sell the job/benefits of not having kids enough and spent too much time dwelling on the negatives.


They were doing a parody of those "lifestyle" drug ads on TV. Those commercials always spend a solid hilarious minute of juxtaposing a long list of grievous, blood curdling side effects with happy music and happy images of people enjoying life.

It wouldn't have been a proper parody otherwise.
 
2014-02-04 03:24:48 PM  

lewismarktwo: Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.

My favorite comment is the one accusing the childless of being selfish for not having kids and perpetuating their genes.  Because _that_ makes sense.


I have been accused of that to my face.  seriously.  More than once.
 
2014-02-04 03:25:00 PM  
Most people that have kids probably shouldn't have.
 
2014-02-04 03:27:17 PM  

sigdiamond2000: I don't see what anyone on either side of the fence could find particularly objectionable about this video.


The seriously religious and the defensive unhappy parent? Lots of folks seem to have an issue with childfree by choice couples.
 
2014-02-04 03:28:03 PM  

vudukungfu: Most people that have kids probably shouldn't have.


THIS.

Sums it up perfectly.
 
2014-02-04 03:29:28 PM  

lewismarktwo: accusing the childless of being selfish for not having kids


Paying school taxes since 1975 as a childless adult.
Putting generations of thankless buttwipes through school.
 
2014-02-04 03:40:03 PM  
I am 37 years old, married and without children...

Sorry everyone with kids, it really is as good as you think it might be. It really is.

The only problem I have found so far is, I have turned into that creepy guy at the bar that is too old to be there. So, I no longer go :(
 
2014-02-04 03:42:08 PM  

Perlin Noise:  I have turned into that creepy guy at the bar that is too old to be there. So, I no longer go :(


51,single, no kids, female...I definitely do not go to bars.....
 
2014-02-04 03:46:03 PM  

Perlin Noise: The only problem I have found so far is, I have turned into that creepy guy at the bar that is too old to be there. So, I no longer go :(


If its any consolation, before you used to be the creepy younger guy.

26 year old male here who doesn't plan on having kids. In my humble, logical, trying-not-to-be-smug opinion, there are are simply too many people on this planet and not enough resources.

That being said, I wouldn't rule out adoption as an option at some point, maybe when I hit early 30s.
 
2014-02-04 03:51:34 PM  

Satan's Bunny Slippers: lewismarktwo: Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.

My favorite comment is the one accusing the childless of being selfish for not having kids and perpetuating their genes.  Because _that_ makes sense.

I have been accused of that to my face.  seriously.  More than once.


Same. And a female friend of mine has gotten the 'but if you don't have babies you'll never truly know what love is!' more than once.
 
2014-02-04 03:53:39 PM  
imgs.xkcd.com
 
2014-02-04 03:59:26 PM  
 
2014-02-04 03:59:32 PM  

Arachnophobe: Satan's Bunny Slippers: lewismarktwo: Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.

My favorite comment is the one accusing the childless of being selfish for not having kids and perpetuating their genes.  Because _that_ makes sense.

I have been accused of that to my face.  seriously.  More than once.

Same. And a female friend of mine has gotten the 'but if you don't have babies you'll never truly know what love is!' more than once.


The wife and I just talked about this tonight. If two people really love each other the type of love they have is... different than the love one has for their kids. So I think your friends are full of shiat and potentially in crappy marriages/relationships.

/2 awesome kids
//the coolest wife (I mean, she's paid for TF for like 4 years running now)
//don't judge
 
2014-02-04 04:06:32 PM  

Baron Krelve: If its any consolation, before you used to be the creepy younger guy.


It's true. I admit it.

quixotando.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-02-04 04:10:03 PM  

MelGoesOnTour: vudukungfu: Most people that have kids probably shouldn't have.

THIS.

Sums it up perfectly.



That's... racist?
 
2014-02-04 04:13:22 PM  
Clevon approves.
 
2014-02-04 04:23:28 PM  
 
2014-02-04 04:31:05 PM  

sigdiamond2000: I don't see what anyone on either side of the fence could find particularly objectionable about this video.


I find this part to be:

"Are you beginning to feel pressure from others to have children of your own? Do you find you are not yet ready to obliterate any chance you have left to enjoy life to its fullest? Then try Not Having Kids!"

I enjoy life just fine with kids. I personally feel someone has to be functionally retarded not to understand how to have kids and not be a miserable piece of shiat all of the time. Since this is the speed of the average anti-kid argument(I.e. If you have kids, your life is a worthless pile of suckage, because I can go to a bar!), I feel no need to watch the video, since they made their usual lame farking argument in the description.

But that's just me, maybe I'm just that much better at things than the average anti-kid farker?
 
2014-02-04 04:31:35 PM  

Smokey the Bare:
The wife and I just talked about this tonight. If two people really love each other the type of love they have is... different than the love one has for their kids. So I think your friends are full of shiat and potentially in crappy marriages/relationships.

/2 awesome kids
//the coolest wife (I mean, she's paid for TF for like 4 years running now)
//don't judge


It was one of her coworkers, and if I recall, you're right about the crappy marriage part.
 
2014-02-04 04:33:36 PM  

Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.


Nobody cares if you have kids it's the farking "You have no life if you have kids, and I'm so happy that I don't that I am going to tell you over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over how farking HAPPY I am and how worthless YOU are." shiat over and over and over and over and over that irritates people. Jesus, these anti kid people are trying REALLY hard to convince us all how farking happy they are, maybe they're trying TOO hard?

Don't insult me and I don't farking care if you have kids.
 
2014-02-04 04:37:51 PM  

Mikey1969: sigdiamond2000: I don't see what anyone on either side of the fence could find particularly objectionable about this video.

I find this part to be:

"Are you beginning to feel pressure from others to have children of your own? Do you find you are not yet ready to obliterate any chance you have left to enjoy life to its fullest? Then try Not Having Kids!"

I enjoy life just fine with kids. I personally feel someone has to be functionally retarded not to understand how to have kids and not be a miserable piece of shiat all of the time. Since this is the speed of the average anti-kid argument(I.e. If you have kids, your life is a worthless pile of suckage, because I can go to a bar!), I feel no need to watch the video, since they made their usual lame farking argument in the description.

But that's just me, maybe I'm just that much better at things than the average anti-kid farker?


You sound pretty mad, bro.  lol 'anti-kid'.
 
2014-02-04 04:43:33 PM  

lewismarktwo: lol 'anti-kid'.


You're right, the "SO Goddam happy to not have kids, I think I'm going to shiat myself" crowd NEVER uses asshole terms like "Crotch Fruit" or "Carpet Rat" to define kids. They are the bastion of sweetness.

Jesus, at least ADMIT the obvious.
 
2014-02-04 04:55:11 PM  

Mikey1969: lewismarktwo: lol 'anti-kid'.

You're right, the "SO Goddam happy to not have kids, I think I'm going to shiat myself" crowd NEVER uses asshole terms like "Crotch Fruit" or "Carpet Rat" to define kids. They are the bastion of sweetness.

Jesus, at least ADMIT the obvious.


www.reactionface.info
 
2014-02-04 04:59:16 PM  

Mikey1969: lewismarktwo: lol 'anti-kid'.

You're right, the "SO Goddam happy to not have kids, I think I'm going to shiat myself" crowd NEVER uses asshole terms like "Crotch Fruit" or "Carpet Rat" to define kids. They are the bastion of sweetness.

Jesus, at least ADMIT the obvious.


cdn.uproxx.com
 
2014-02-04 05:00:46 PM  
Well, my son will be turning a year old in just under a month.  Easily the best thing to ever happen to me.  Heading home to hug him now.  You're right though, I CAN'T go to the bar tonight.  Darn.
 
2014-02-04 05:09:41 PM  
Say, can anyone do a bitter and resentful parody video about living alone and getting sick and tired of your friends posting about their significant others having fun together, how they live and work together a a cohesive unit, how they pay less taxes, how they spend less of their time doing laundry, dishes, shopping, fixing dinner, making more money, pooling resources, sharing bills, helping each other through difficult times, raising a family, caring for each other in poor health...
 
2014-02-04 05:19:02 PM  
Married to my HS sweetheart. Been together 26 years, married for 17 and we mutually decided long ago that kids weren't for us. We're still deeply in love and thoroughly enjoy spending time together.The way I look at it, we married EACH OTHER. Because we really, really dig each other. We didn't marry a kid. We didn't enter a relationship as a conduit to children. And we pretty much keep that to ourselves, i.e. don't throw it in other's faces.

But you would not beLIEVE the shiat my wife especially has to go through. The comments, even from peripheral people (the guy who owns our local Greek joint lambasted my wife for not having children, reminding her that when she's old, she'll be "lonely and unhappy"- WTF?!1) are downright vile.

But it all smooths out when my wife and I fly to Cabo twice a year with 2 small carry-on pieces and nothing else. Because we can.

Sorry- was that "smug"?

Listen- not having kids does NOT necessarily = "going to a bar" as some parents above have pointed out. What it means is that I can. At any time I want. WIthout calling a "sitter". It's called "freedom". I can go to a bar. Or go for a run. Or bang one out on my couch. Or book a vacation somewhere other than Disney.
 
2014-02-04 05:20:32 PM  

Mikey1969: You're right, the "SO Goddam happy to not have kids, I think I'm going to shiat myself" crowd NEVER uses asshole terms like "Crotch Fruit" or "Carpet Rat" to define kids. They are the bastion of sweetness.


Oh, terms.  I use those (and worse) as someone who'd really like to have kids, but almost certainly won't get to. My sister uses those (and worse) and she has several kids that she likes pretty well.  Meh.
 
2014-02-04 05:27:01 PM  

Mikey1969: Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.

Nobody cares if you have kids it's the farking "You have no life if you have kids, and I'm so happy that I don't that I am going to tell you over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over how farking HAPPY I am and how worthless YOU are." shiat over and over and over and over and over that irritates people. Jesus, these anti kid people are trying REALLY hard to convince us all how farking happy they are, maybe they're trying TOO hard?

Don't insult me and I don't farking care if you have kids.


That is patently false, angry dude. The minimal amount of douchey breeder comments you have to endure is nothing like the avalanche of snide "you'll never be happy/you're probably gay crap" folks that don't want kids have to deal with every day. Your over the top reaction is typical and makes my point for me.
 
2014-02-04 05:39:06 PM  
I have kids. It works for me. If someone else doesn't want them, that's great for them.

The people who tell others how they should live should STFU.

/watching them get good at skiing has been a joy this year
//teaching the son to play rugby will be awesome
 
2014-02-04 05:49:22 PM  

andrewagill: Say, can anyone do a bitter and resentful parody video about living alone and getting sick and tired of your friends posting about their significant others having fun together, how they live and work together a a cohesive unit, how they pay less taxes, how they spend less of their time doing laundry, dishes, shopping, fixing dinner, making more money, pooling resources, sharing bills, helping each other through difficult times, raising a family, caring for each other in poor health...


Really, those two together?
 
2014-02-04 05:56:27 PM  

Ow! That was my feelings!: Mikey1969: Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.

Nobody cares if you have kids it's the farking "You have no life if you have kids, and I'm so happy that I don't that I am going to tell you over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over how farking HAPPY I am and how worthless YOU are." shiat over and over and over and over and over that irritates people. Jesus, these anti kid people are trying REALLY hard to convince us all how farking happy they are, maybe they're trying TOO hard?

Don't insult me and I don't farking care if you have kids.

That is patently false, angry dude. The minimal amount of douchey breeder comments you have to endure is nothing like the avalanche of snide "you'll never be happy/you're probably gay crap" folks that don't want kids have to deal with every day. Your over the top reaction is typical and makes my point for me.


How strange that nor only have I never said it, but I've never heard anyone else say it.

But maybe I hang out with a better class of people than you guys?
 
2014-02-04 06:03:51 PM  

Mikey1969: Ow! That was my feelings!: Mikey1969: Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.

Nobody cares if you have kids it's the farking "You have no life if you have kids, and I'm so happy that I don't that I am going to tell you over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over how farking HAPPY I am and how worthless YOU are." shiat over and over and over and over and over that irritates people. Jesus, these anti kid people are trying REALLY hard to convince us all how farking happy they are, maybe they're trying TOO hard?

Don't insult me and I don't farking care if you have kids.

That is patently false, angry dude. The minimal amount of douchey breeder comments you have to endure is nothing like the avalanche of snide "you'll never be happy/you're probably gay crap" folks that don't want kids have to deal with every day. Your over the top reaction is typical and makes my point for me.

How strange that nor only have I never said it, but I've never heard anyone else say it.

But maybe I hang out with a better class of people than you guys?


If you have kids and always wanted them, it's hardly surprising you haven't heard any comments. And you don't get to choose your relatives.
 
2014-02-04 06:37:40 PM  
I have kids, and I have no problem with people who choose not to have any.

My God, I am such a good person.
 
2014-02-04 06:38:06 PM  

Ow! That was my feelings!: Mikey1969: Ow! That was my feelings!: Mikey1969: Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.

Nobody cares if you have kids it's the farking "You have no life if you have kids, and I'm so happy that I don't that I am going to tell you over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over how farking HAPPY I am and how worthless YOU are." shiat over and over and over and over and over that irritates people. Jesus, these anti kid people are trying REALLY hard to convince us all how farking happy they are, maybe they're trying TOO hard?

Don't insult me and I don't farking care if you have kids.

That is patently false, angry dude. The minimal amount of douchey breeder comments you have to endure is nothing like the avalanche of snide "you'll never be happy/you're probably gay crap" folks that don't want kids have to deal with every day. Your over the top reaction is typical and makes my point for me.

How strange that nor only have I never said it, but I've never heard anyone else say it.

But maybe I hang out with a better class of people than you guys?

If you have kids and always wanted them, it's hardly surprising you haven't heard any comments. And you don't get to choose your relatives.


Actually, I inherited stepsons when I was about 30 and didn't have my own daughter until 38, so no, I didn't "Always want" kids.

As for your family, I fail to see why that is the fault of people who have kids, but whatever...
 
2014-02-04 06:46:32 PM  

Mikey1969: Ow! That was my feelings!: Mikey1969: Ow! That was my feelings!: Mikey1969: Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.

Nobody cares if you have kids it's the farking "You have no life if you have kids, and I'm so happy that I don't that I am going to tell you over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over how farking HAPPY I am and how worthless YOU are." shiat over and over and over and over and over that irritates people. Jesus, these anti kid people are trying REALLY hard to convince us all how farking happy they are, maybe they're trying TOO hard?

Don't insult me and I don't farking care if you have kids.

That is patently false, angry dude. The minimal amount of douchey breeder comments you have to endure is nothing like the avalanche of snide "you'll never be happy/you're probably gay crap" folks that don't want kids have to deal with every day. Your over the top reaction is typical and makes my point for me.

How strange that nor only have I never said it, but I've never heard anyone else say it.

But maybe I hang out with a better class of people than you guys?

If you have kids and always wanted them, it's hardly surprising you haven't heard any comments. And you don't get to choose your relatives.

Actually, I inherited stepsons when I was about 30 and didn't have my own daughter until 38, so no, I didn't "Always want" kids.

As for your family, I fail to see why that is the fault of people who have kids, but whatever...


My family is not the fault of people with kids, just an example of the outrage at my lack of children. I haven't said a thing about parents, just taking issue with your over the top anger at a farking parity and your false assertion that nobody cares if someone doesn't have kids. It really does matter to a lot of folks, whether you believe it or not.
 
2014-02-04 07:51:48 PM  

ThatGuyFromTheInternet: andrewagill: Say, can anyone do a bitter and resentful parody video about living alone and getting sick and tired of your friends posting about their significant others having fun together, how they live and work together a a cohesive unit, how they pay less taxes, how they spend less of their time doing laundry, dishes, shopping, fixing dinner, making more money, pooling resources, sharing bills, helping each other through difficult times, raising a family, caring for each other in poor health...

Really, those two together?


Yup.  Economies of scale.  A family might spend more time doing laundry but each person in that family will wind up spending less time because you can do it once for everyone.

/Okay, maybe laundry wasn't the best answer.  It's probably more accurate for DINK families.
 
2014-02-04 08:31:56 PM  

Ow! That was my feelings!: Mikey1969: Satan's Bunny Slippers: It took a suprisingly short amount of time in the comments for the "OMG how can anyone NOT want kids?" crowd to show up and start accusing the "smug childless" of being a little TOO happy.

christ, why anyone would care if I had kids or not, unless it required them to fark me I'll never know.

Nobody cares if you have kids it's the farking "You have no life if you have kids, and I'm so happy that I don't that I am going to tell you over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over how farking HAPPY I am and how worthless YOU are." shiat over and over and over and over and over that irritates people. Jesus, these anti kid people are trying REALLY hard to convince us all how farking happy they are, maybe they're trying TOO hard?

Don't insult me and I don't farking care if you have kids.

That is patently false, angry dude. The minimal amount of douchey breeder comments you have to endure is nothing like the avalanche of snide "you'll never be happy/you're probably gay crap" folks that don't want kids have to deal with every day. Your over the top reaction is typical and makes my point for me.


Is that cross extra heavy?

/an avalanche of snide comments every day? Who the fark do you interact with on a daily basis that cares that much about whether you have kids? Or is this one of those things where by "avalanche of snide comments" you mean "someone said something mean to me on Facebook about it once and I never got over it"?
 
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