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(Yahoo)   The 5 least intelligent dog breeds. Your dog wants, um uh hmm   (shine.yahoo.com) divider line 130
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17082 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Feb 2014 at 8:34 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2014-02-02 10:22:12 AM  

CheetahOlivetti: neongoats: CheetahOlivetti: I have a chihuahua/yellow lab mix. Size of a chihuahua and personality of a lab. I'm really glad it's not the other way around.

Seriously? Was the mom a lab or a chi? What kind of acrobatics were involved in creating that litter?


Dunno, but I'm sure it was hilarious. We got her from a shelter. Chihuahua face with a heavier body and very obvious labrador coat. She's a cuddler, and she loves everyone she meets.


That's great. My sister has a yellow lab and he would be hilarious if he was chi sized, the big goof.
 
2014-02-02 10:22:25 AM  
Came for Fred and the Snowman. Leaving disappointed.
 
2014-02-02 10:23:25 AM  
Brawno?
 
2014-02-02 10:24:11 AM  
A million years ago, some guy kept an Irish Setter in his dorm and, sadistically, tossed it lit firecrackers. So, any breed that would chase a 2nd lit firecracker (much less more of them) is impossibly stupid.

/never saw it myself
//could be urban legend

My list would include Jack Russell's. If only for the one who bit my Border Collie. We were out in a little boulevard grass area waiting for Nature to call (my dog was leashed and I had a pooper scooper), when a car pulled up, a back door opened, and out came a Jack Russell all by its lonesome. The dog simply walked up to mine, without either provocation or agonistic behavior, and battened itself to her cheek like a ramora on a shark. My dog didn't respond in kind, but just looked at me like Patience on a Plinth, the other dog dangling from its face.

I knew what to do and lightly toed the little blister in the short-breads. That prompted an open window in the car and an apology(!) which was unique among aggressive dog owners in my experience. She called to her mutt to return, and they fled the scene.

Apparently Jack Russell's have some kind of extra-aggressive training they undergo for that chase-the-fox-tail race they run.
 
2014-02-02 10:41:32 AM  
I adopted a small (adult wt. = 36 lbs) beagle/hound mix from a rescue service.  Incredible athlete who can easily run down a scampering squirrel, although he won't harm them.  I think he just laughs to himself after he scares the squirrel poop out of them as they escape.

I have plenty of experience with dogs, but while training this one as a pup, I couldn't shake the feeling that he was training me, as well.  It all resolved nicely, but I would not argue with anyone who might suggest that he is smarter than me.

/named him "Elvis"
 
2014-02-02 11:01:14 AM  

Fritriac: The most stupid dog i've ever met was a boxer. His specific "superpowers" included running through narrow doors with a way too large branch (or a similar object), drinking every drop of beer he was able to find and fall asleep, belching and farting, in the oddest places (including a freshly excavated grave) and puke on his owners lap.


In my neighborhood, when I was a kid, there was a family that was wealthier than everybody else.  They had a multiple lot property, with a large fenced in yard.  In the yard roamed, King the boxer.  As you walked down the sidewalk, King would hurl himself against the fence, in an awesome display of ferocity.  All the kids were afraid of King.  One night, the family was gone, leaving only the elderly grandfather and King at home.  2 or 3 guys did a targeted home invasion.  They tied the grandfather to a chair and were roughing him up,to get him to tell them where the valuables were.  While they were doing this, King was sitting nearby, being petted by one of the robbers.  The grandfather survived the ordeal and the next morning, King was king no more.

/CSB: When I was younger, this family's father owned a auto dealership, that the Outfit wanted to take over.  The father didn't want to sell, so the mob guys set off a "surprise package" in front of the house, one morning.  The father became one of the first strip mall developers in the area, soon after that.
 
2014-02-02 11:05:36 AM  
Norma the basset hound is not dumb. She has an attitude and really doesn't give a damn about what you want her to do. It seems to me that if a dog can analyze a command and say "fark it", that requires intelligence.
 
2014-02-02 11:07:09 AM  
In my limited experience, you can get a dud, even out of a breed that is not supposed to be stupid. Our papillon has to be the dumbest dog ever. She barely understands "sit". She has no reasoning skills whatsoever. Once she lost her ball under a blanket on the couch, and she just looked at us wondering where it had gone. Another time, I threw her ball in the back yard and it bounded through a small space between a rake and the fence. She couldn't get through that space, and never thought that she could just walk around the rake to get the ball.

On the plus side, she is a very happy, non-neurotic, friendly little dog. As far as she is concerned, life is excellent. People drop food from the counter, she gets scratches, she gets cookies and treats, everybody loves her, so don't worry, be happy!

Now, our Shepherd cross, on the other hand is far too smart and neurotic for his own (and our) good. He has a long memory, and is sneaky enough to go do something later when you are not watching, and smart enough to figure out new ways to get into things you wanted him out of.  He lets the Papillon think she is boss, but really, he is the boss, probably of all of us. A bit fear aggressive, unfortunately, but he loves his pack of people and dog, and nothing bad will ever happen to them.
 
2014-02-02 11:10:43 AM  
My dog Badger is some sort of terrier mix, and is by far the dumbest dog I have ever had. If he gets upset he makes hilarious tauntaun sounds. Love him!


i1058.photobucket.com
 
2014-02-02 11:14:34 AM  
Mine is just part basset hound. The selective deafness thing isn't a joke, but it's hilarious when she barks and surprises herself-- like she opened her mouth and some other, bigger dog barked.
 
2014-02-02 11:30:11 AM  
I wouldn't call Irish Setters dumb. Crazy, yes, but not dumb.
 
2014-02-02 11:43:25 AM  

EvilEgg: I have a basset hound, it's not they're stupid, it's that they just don't care.

/ or he could just be stupid.


I have a basset hound and last month I was sick with a nasty stomach virus. As I was laying on the floor of my bathroom because I couldn't get too far from the toilet to either throw up or have diarrhea, my little girl (60 pounds) laid there with me whining because she knew something was wrong. Or she just may have been hungry but I think bassets care.

But they are so stupid.
 
2014-02-02 11:50:26 AM  

jbc: Irish setters are not dumb. They are batcrap insane, but not dumb.


Bermuda59: I wouldn't call Irish Setters dumb. Crazy, yes, but not dumb.


I dunno. My cousins had several setters when I was growing up. The last two they had (before they moved on to labradors) managed to get a face full of porcupine quills on two separate occasions. Most other creatures learn to leave porkies alone pretty quickly, which makes me think these guys weren't the brightest of dogs.

I'm very surprised dalmations didn't make the list. I knew a guy who lost two of them because they jumped off his yacht. One drowned (it took the leap when he wasn't looking and he sailed off without it); to make sure that didn't happen again, he kept the second on a leash, and apparently it hanged itself by jumping over the edge anyhow. I don't know if you should blame the dogs or the owner in that case.
 
2014-02-02 11:56:59 AM  

Bermuda59: I wouldn't call Irish Setters dumb. Crazy, yes, but not dumb.


Well, they put the part Irish in them, so what did they think was going to happen.
 
2014-02-02 12:09:34 PM  
Awesome. I have a chihuahua (wife's choice) and just adopted a pug (again, her choice).

1 & 2 do infact = DERP


/I hate dealing with the training phases
 
2014-02-02 12:19:58 PM  
Do the dumb dogs want "stake"?
 
2014-02-02 12:25:26 PM  
I have a chihuahua and he's awesome the only real secret to chihuahuas is to treat them like dogs and not toys or fashion accessories. There is no dog more loyal than a chihuahua I'd bet any money that if somebody did break into my house my chihuahua would go down fighting while my German shepherd tried to get the burglar to reach him down the Milk Bones.
 
2014-02-02 12:27:39 PM  
I have a rescue dog from the S.P.C.A. and am not sure what breed she is. She loves the water.
img.fark.net
 
2014-02-02 12:29:59 PM  
I was a bit bummed when I discovered that greyhounds are dumb.
I still want one. Or more.
 
2014-02-02 12:34:31 PM  
Kind of a dumb article.  I have a part Chihuahua little mutt in our home pack, and he's a clever little weasel.  So I followed the link to learn more about the breed, and the link called them "highly intelligent."

I have to assume the article was written by a robot that didn't care about consistency.
 
2014-02-02 12:37:17 PM  

Fritriac: The most stupid dog i've ever met was a boxer. His specific "superpowers" included running through narrow doors with a way too large branch (or a similar object), drinking every drop of beer he was able to find and fall asleep, belching and farting, in the oddest places (including a freshly excavated grave) and puke on his owners lap.


Our boxer, despite living in the house for years and having an established routine, ran right through a closed glass patio door one day.  He didn't even slow down, glass shards everywhere, how he didn't cut himself to ribbons I will never know.  It was like he didn't see it and worse didn't even realize he had done it.  He then turned around and sat down amidst the glass wreckage, panting and smiling, waiting for his usual treat for coming in the house.

Cute, strong, and about as sharp as a bag of wet hair.
 
2014-02-02 12:40:23 PM  
I dont think bassets are dumb, I think they are just cute enough to get away with disregarding your commands.
 
2014-02-02 12:46:33 PM  

EvilEgg: I have a basset hound, it's not they're stupid, it's that they just don't care.

/ or he could just be stupid.


Lazy, kinda dumb, but we still like her.

imageshack.com
 
2014-02-02 01:07:56 PM  
My husky/border collie/chow mix is crazy smart, and a total conspiracy theorist. She connects the strangest events -- got freaked out by a motorboat's wake passing on a river once in Louisiana, and now absolutely refuses to get close to the ocean because of the waves. Is highly suspicious of guys in hats and sunglasses. Expects me to howl with her whenever she hears coyotes (not so much conspiracy theorist there, but it always cracks me up). Glares at me when I offer her water after short walks, because she connects it to me telling her to get back in the car in the middle of long road trips when she still wants to run around and sniff stuff. Being on a leash when meeting other dogs = other dog is evil and she has to turn into a raving Cujo-sounding maniac; being off leash when meeting other dogs = other dog is cool new buddy.

Love her to bits, but she's a nut. I'm pretty sure she believes in black helicopters and chem-trails.
 
2014-02-02 01:37:26 PM  
We have a border collie mix and a GSD mix. I don't think the collie got the collie brains.

Our shepherd did get the smarts; he dug out of the backyard once and opened the gate latch to let himself back in.
 
2014-02-02 01:37:58 PM  
I don't know if Chihuahuas deserve to be on the dumb list, but much like Pit Bulls they seem to attract people that really shouldn't be owning a dog. "He's so small, he doesn't need training!" They are far and away the least socialized breed I've ever encountered, as a whole.

Spaniels and Greyhounds are the dumbest, IMO.
 
2014-02-02 01:40:05 PM  

gordian: My husky/border collie/chow mix is crazy smart, and a total conspiracy theorist. She connects the strangest events -- got freaked out by a motorboat's wake passing on a river once in Louisiana, and now absolutely refuses to get close to the ocean because of the waves. Is highly suspicious of guys in hats and sunglasses. Expects me to howl with her whenever she hears coyotes (not so much conspiracy theorist there, but it always cracks me up). Glares at me when I offer her water after short walks, because she connects it to me telling her to get back in the car in the middle of long road trips when she still wants to run around and sniff stuff. Being on a leash when meeting other dogs = other dog is evil and she has to turn into a raving Cujo-sounding maniac; being off leash when meeting other dogs = other dog is cool new buddy.

Love her to bits, but she's a nut. I'm pretty sure she believes in black helicopters and chem-trails.


Sounds like mine. my BiL who lives with us is a really ditzy cook, to the point where she now gets scared when anyone turns on the stove, because she's connected that the stove = smoke alarm.
 
2014-02-02 01:43:12 PM  
I've got a Plott Hound that's just as stupid as a bag of hair.

But then my Aussie/Heeler mix is disturbingly intelligent (like pulling cabinet drawers out to different lengths and using them as a stepladder... and then pushing them back in after she's gotten treats out of an upper cabinet)

My daughter's Husky makes them both look stoopid. I think that dog is plotting some sort of takeover.
 
2014-02-02 01:44:13 PM  
scontent-a-ord.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2014-02-02 01:45:25 PM  
At the pet clinic I work at we joke that the smart dogs are the ones that put up the most fight when coming in the door! I personally have everything from Chihuahuas to German shepherds and my shepherd was the smartest dog I've ever seen, by far. I'd brag, but this is the internet so nobody would believe me anyway :-\
 
2014-02-02 01:48:42 PM  

I don't care if they are dumb. Just look at that face!



i274.photobucket.com

/ Have 3 Bassets. I just LOVE them
 
2014-02-02 01:53:36 PM  
My girlfriend has a Bedlington terrier. It's a stupid, weird-looking, inbred dog. Pic not of hers

ashcrofterriers.com


Typical visit to her place:

OMG STRANGER! Bark bark bark bark bark bark bark

a little while later: hey guy, I'll lie down on your lap for a while and please pet me

*sudden realization*

Wait a minute -- OMG STRANGER! bark bark bark bark bark bark bark

5 minutes later....

hey guy, I'll lie down on your lap for a while and please pet me

*sudden realization*

Wait a minute -- OMG STRANGER! bark bark bark bark bark bark bark

5 minutes later ....

hey guy, I'll lie down on your lap for a while and please pet me

Wait a minute -- OMG STRANGER! bark bark bark bark bark bark bark

repeat all day
 
2014-02-02 02:01:14 PM  

I. R. Rottweiler: My dog Badger is some sort of terrier mix, and is by far the dumbest dog I have ever had. If he gets upset he makes hilarious tauntaun sounds. Love him!


[i1058.photobucket.com image 453x604]


Looks like Peanut, god rest his soul.  Dumb as rocks, which he like to eat.  Also liked to sleep under cars, which I'm sure you can figure out the rest.
 
2014-02-02 02:02:59 PM  

Porous Horace: I was a bit bummed when I discovered that greyhounds are dumb.
I still want one. Or more.


A friend of ours had a greyhound rescue dog.  We went to her farm once and met her greyhound and two other dogs. It was a hot day and the greyhound was taunting the other two -- a Belgian police dog and ???, The greyhound had a rope toy that it would place near the other two and when they would try to get it, the greyhound would effortlessly snatch it away. Then, a few second later would put it near them again. This went on for around 10 minutes. The greyhound may have been dumb but it had a great sense of humor.
 
2014-02-02 02:04:09 PM  

Tax Boy: My girlfriend has a Bedlington terrier. It's a stupid, weird-looking, inbred dog. Pic not of hers

[ashcrofterriers.com image 504x374]


Typical visit to her place:

OMG STRANGER! Bark bark bark bark bark bark bark

a little while later: hey guy, I'll lie down on your lap for a while and please pet me

*sudden realization*

Wait a minute -- OMG STRANGER! bark bark bark bark bark bark bark

5 minutes later....

hey guy, I'll lie down on your lap for a while and please pet me

*sudden realization*

Wait a minute -- OMG STRANGER! bark bark bark bark bark bark bark

5 minutes later ....

hey guy, I'll lie down on your lap for a while and please pet me

Wait a minute -- OMG STRANGER! bark bark bark bark bark bark bark

repeat all day

There's a bit of ambiguity here..

 
2014-02-02 02:07:42 PM  

Krymson Tyde: EvilEgg: The basset hound also got laziest, so my dog is stupid and lazy. I bet if he could buy his own beer he would fit in here.

I have a good friend who had a pair of bassets that were possibly the laziest dogs I've ever known. Except...he lived next to a cow pasture and as soon as he let them outside the male would sprint to the closest pile of Coe shiat he could find. Once arriving at his destination he would, not quite roll do much as dive, back first, into the often still warm shiat.
But other than that he was the type of dog that would howl because he was laying on his nuts, but wouldn't move because it took too much effort.


I'm choking!
 
2014-02-02 02:08:17 PM  
One of the big problems with pugs is stubborness. They're notorious among groomers for not putting up with having their feet handled. 

The other problem of course is idiots who think giving their pug all the food it wants makes their cute little baby happy. It doesn't, it makes them a suffering, obese tub of lard. For god's sake, keep your pug on a diet. They should have a narrow waist like my Dixie pug up there.
 
2014-02-02 02:20:03 PM  

Churchill2004: One of the big problems with pugs is stubborness. They're notorious among groomers for not putting up with having their feet handled. 

The other problem of course is idiots who think giving their pug all the food it wants makes their cute little baby happy. It doesn't, it makes them a suffering, obese tub of lard. For god's sake, keep your pug on a diet. They should have a narrow waist like my Dixie pug up there.


Very nice waistline on ur pug. I hold the dogs for the vet to examine at work, he also trims toenails and draws blood, and some of the hardest dogs to hold are fat pigs with no necks! No matter how much we tell ppl not to over feed their dogs, or how bad it is for the dogs health, it's always the same, "but look at that face, how can I say no"
 
2014-02-02 02:21:26 PM  

haolegirl: Churchill2004: One of the big problems with pugs is stubborness. They're notorious among groomers for not putting up with having their feet handled. 

The other problem of course is idiots who think giving their pug all the food it wants makes their cute little baby happy. It doesn't, it makes them a suffering, obese tub of lard. For god's sake, keep your pug on a diet. They should have a narrow waist like my Dixie pug up there.

Very nice waistline on ur pug. I hold the dogs for the vet to examine at work, he also trims toenails and draws blood, and some of the hardest dogs to hold are fat pigs with no necks! No matter how much we tell ppl not to over feed their dogs, or how bad it is for the dogs health, it's always the same, "but look at that face, how can I say no"


*pugs... I ment pugs, but pigs works too I guess
 
2014-02-02 02:27:11 PM  
Boxer/chihuahua mix named Bitsy.  She's three years old now and still can't figure out how to knock over an upside-down cup to get a treat.

scontent-b-ord.xx.fbcdn.net
 
2014-02-02 02:29:15 PM  

IExpectAKill: Boxer/chihuahua mix


Wait, what?

Which was the mom?
 
2014-02-02 02:36:41 PM  
pictures.picpedia.com
 
2014-02-02 02:38:55 PM  

Yankees Team Gynecologist: IExpectAKill: Boxer/chihuahua mix

Wait, what?

Which was the mom?


Unless you've seen a chihuahua running around with a gaping hole, I'm going to guess the boxer was the mama.
www.thecomedynet.com
 
2014-02-02 02:41:41 PM  

Ow! That was my feelings!: I don't know if Chihuahuas deserve to be on the dumb list, but much like Pit Bulls they seem to attract people that really shouldn't be owning a dog. "He's so small, he doesn't need training!" They are far and away the least socialized breed I've ever encountered, as a whole.

Spaniels and Greyhounds are the dumbest, IMO.


My Cocker is pretty dumb, My English Springer is pretty smart. Dalmations are very dumb.
 
2014-02-02 02:48:02 PM  

Churchill2004: One of the big problems with pugs is stubborness. They're notorious among groomers for not putting up with having their feet handled.

The other problem of course is idiots who think giving their pug all the food it wants makes their cute little baby happy. It doesn't, it makes them a suffering, obese tub of lard. For god's sake, keep your pug on a diet. They should have a narrow waist like my Dixie pug up there.


My Mom's ex-bf has a black pug. If anything keeps that dog thin, it's that 1. he's not neutered (ex-bf didn't want to do that to him) and B. he gets walked 3 miles to work every day. His coat color is also very slimming.

/the pug's not dumb, just not very smart
 
2014-02-02 02:50:52 PM  
Still not sure where Shar-Peis should be on that list, if at all.

My dog is smart enough to stop and think things through before doing. She's also dumb enough to eat three feet of paper towel, and run face first into a chain link fence.

/It was a delicate thing, pulling three feet of paper towel out of my dog's ass.
//She got a good roto-rootering for it, anyways...
 
2014-02-02 03:28:27 PM  

A_bomb37: I had a Shiba Inu whom I couldnt tell if he was dumb or a genius. He was very person-like.  Also kind of a jack ass.

He got loose from the backyard one day when I was 14 or so, and I spent nearly an hour chasing him with a big grin on his face. When he finally got tired, he stopped about 20 feet in front of me and just stared me down...

and then jumped in a puddle and waited for me to go get him.


Wow

Much Chase

Very Run
 
2014-02-02 03:38:35 PM  
Sounds like mine. my BiL who lives with us is a really ditzy cook, to the point where she now gets scared when anyone turns on the stove, because she's connected that the stove = smoke alarm.

Ha! Love it.
 
2014-02-02 03:45:47 PM  

haolegirl: At the pet clinic I work at we joke that the smart dogs are the ones that put up the most fight when coming in the door! I personally have everything from Chihuahuas to German shepherds and my shepherd was the smartest dog I've ever seen, by far. I'd brag, but this is the internet so nobody would believe me anyway :-\


My god, German Shepherds are smart.  Scary smart.  Problem solving smart.  When he was a puppy, my shepherd would sit and stare at a problem, like a toy under an overturned clothes basket, and just look at it.  Then after about a minute, he would nose the basket over the edge of the stairs until the toy dropped out the bottom and reach over and grab it.  No flurry of activity or panic.  Just look, analyse, and solve.

If they had thumbs and speech, we would be in serious trouble.
 
2014-02-02 03:54:05 PM  

Prank Call of Cthulhu: Poodles aren't on the list? Really?

[Checks the link in TFA for the five smartest dogs.]

Poodles are smart?

[24.media.tumblr.com image 479x361]


Poodles were originally bred to be hunting dogs.

God news for you all. These intelligence ratings are based on how quickly a dog can learn a command and how many times you need to repeat a command to get a response. A "smart" dog is one that learns quickly and responds quickly. A "dumb" dog is one that learns slowly and needs to have a command repeated multiple times.
 
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