If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Reuters)   Secret Service arrests hatchet-wielding, rifle-toting nutjob for planning to kill ex-President George W. Bush so he could have sex with Barbara Bush. Enjoy your nightmares, folks   (reuters.com) divider line 104
    More: Sick, Barbara Bush, George W. Bush, Secret Service, rifles, nightmares  
•       •       •

5091 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Feb 2014 at 2:01 AM (46 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



104 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2014-01-31 09:43:44 PM  
i1182.photobucket.com
 
2014-01-31 10:50:20 PM  
cdn.breitbart.com

This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT

a.abcnews.com
Barbara Bush, his mother
 
2014-01-31 11:07:20 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 475x355]

This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT

[a.abcnews.com image 850x478]
Barbara Bush, his mother


I never understood how those two could be twins. Their family tree must look like a freeway cloverleaf.
 
2014-01-31 11:26:38 PM  

UNAUTHORIZED FINGER: Bathia_Mapes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 475x355]

This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT

[a.abcnews.com image 850x478]
Barbara Bush, his mother

I never understood how those two could be twins. Their family tree must look like a freeway cloverleaf.


They're sororal twins (female version of fraternal twins). Fraternal/sororal twins are non-identical because they're from two eggs that are fertilized by two different sperm cells. Essentially they're two siblings who happen to be born at the same time.
 
2014-01-31 11:46:38 PM  

Bathia_Mapes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 475x355]

This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT

[a.abcnews.com image 850x478]
Barbara Bush, his mother


While I appreciate your clarification, I have to say you've deflated this thread before it ever got started

/it could have been glorious
 
2014-02-01 12:01:42 AM  
"Hey, so I just shot your dad and chopped him into tiny chunks. Want to grab a coffee or something?"
 
2014-02-01 12:02:37 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: Bathia_Mapes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 475x355]

This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT

[a.abcnews.com image 850x478]
Barbara Bush, his mother

While I appreciate your clarification, I have to say you've deflated this thread before it ever got started

/it could have been glorious


yes. but being saved the mental trauma of Barbara Bush the elder and sex in the same sentence is not a bad thing.
 
2014-02-01 12:10:35 AM  
It is a crime under federal law to threaten a current or former president.

While I know there's a federal statute specifically for threatening the president, it's also illegal to threaten to kill people in general.  It's just that they needed a federal law on the books so the Secret Service has reason to investigate each threat. Also, the president has his own police force to investigate each claim, which is why Gomer from down the street can keep threatening to hit you with a shovel and no one seems to do anything about it.
 
2014-02-01 12:11:30 AM  

Bathia_Mapes: Fraternal/sororal twins are non-identical because they're from two eggs that are fertilized by two different sperm cells. Essentially they're two siblings who happen to be born at the same time.


Yeah, I'm a fraternal twin.  We look very similar, but that's not always the case.  Looks to me like those two heavily favored each parent.
 
2014-02-01 12:14:27 AM  

Lsherm: Bathia_Mapes: Fraternal/sororal twins are non-identical because they're from two eggs that are fertilized by two different sperm cells. Essentially they're two siblings who happen to be born at the same time.

Yeah, I'm a fraternal twin.  We look very similar, but that's not always the case.  Looks to me like those two heavily favored each parent.


So you have an alt? :)
 
2014-02-01 12:16:50 AM  

UNAUTHORIZED FINGER: Lsherm: Bathia_Mapes: Fraternal/sororal twins are non-identical because they're from two eggs that are fertilized by two different sperm cells. Essentially they're two siblings who happen to be born at the same time.

Yeah, I'm a fraternal twin.  We look very similar, but that's not always the case.  Looks to me like those two heavily favored each parent.

So you have an alt? :)


A real life one.  Came in handy when my license was suspended when I was 17 for speeding.  Ohio had a law on the books that gave you 24 hours to provide a license if you were pulled over for a traffic infraction, so when they took mine, I borrowed his.  We didn't get pulled over during the suspension, but damn was it nice.

Of course, the 80's were a great time for a lot of things.
 
2014-02-01 12:35:25 AM  
I have it on good authority that that time GW "choked on a pretzel" he was actually banging Laura in the shower and slipped
 
2014-02-01 02:03:55 AM  
Definitely the craziest thing I've heard this week.
 
2014-02-01 02:05:24 AM  
On Fark, the senior Barbara is considered a "hottie"
 
2014-02-01 02:05:27 AM  
Barb Bush Sr drove home from the hospital with a terminal fetus (GW's brother) in a jar. True story.
 
2014-02-01 02:06:34 AM  

Bathia_Mapes: This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT


Barbara Bush, his mother


Why not both?

Ok I just threw up in my mouth saying that one
 
2014-02-01 02:07:11 AM  
"Admittedly, there is some inconsistency in the notion that the way to win Barbara Bush's affections is to kill her father"

Gee, ya think?
 
2014-02-01 02:07:21 AM  
Yet you can be not crazy, a retired general, threaten a coup on the white house and it's all good, right?
 
2014-02-01 02:07:28 AM  
His mother finally got him out of the house.
 
2014-02-01 02:08:25 AM  
 
2014-02-01 02:09:50 AM  

WI241TH: I have it on good authority that that time GW "choked on a pretzel" he was actually banging Laura in the shower and slipped


That's bad news...for Obama.
 
2014-02-01 02:10:15 AM  
Who is this Mr. Service and why does he want to have sex with Mrs. Bush?!!?
 
2014-02-01 02:11:02 AM  
The killer awoke before dawn, and he put his boots on..........
 
2014-02-01 02:12:13 AM  
Nutjob?
I guess Republicans really are the job creators.
 
2014-02-01 02:12:31 AM  

Begoggle: On Fark, the senior Barbara is considered a "hottie"


If it was Fark it'd be from the Daily Fail and she'd be called "Smokin' hot"
 
2014-02-01 02:12:52 AM  
oi60.tinypic.com
 
2014-02-01 02:13:59 AM  
""I'm going to work for George W. Bush and the Pentagon," the note said, according to the government. "I have to slay a dragon and then Barbara Bush is mine.""

Oh that Gandalf, always setting up adventures for the Hobbits.
 
2014-02-01 02:18:12 AM  
I remember one mental hospital patient got arrested for wanting to cut Bush's balls off.
 
2014-02-01 02:19:19 AM  

jso2897: The killer awoke before dawn, and he put his boots on..........


He went into the room where the president lived...
 
2014-02-01 02:24:25 AM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Barb Bush Sr drove home from the hospital with a terminal fetus (GW's brother) in a jar. True story.


I thought that was one of the Romney clan?
 
2014-02-01 02:26:10 AM  
I don't know.... maybe we should hear this guy out.
 
2014-02-01 02:26:27 AM  

UNAUTHORIZED FINGER: Bathia_Mapes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 475x355]

This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT

[a.abcnews.com image 850x478]
Barbara Bush, his mother

I never understood how those two could be twins. Their family tree must look like a freeway cloverleaf.


You don't really get that not all twins are of the same egg and sperm, right?
 
2014-02-01 02:28:11 AM  

Oldiron_79: Bathia_Mapes: This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT


Barbara Bush, his mother

Why not both?

Ok I just threw up in my mouth saying that one


Okay, now imagine former First Ladies Barbara Bush & Nancy Reagan singing the Divinyls song "I Touch Myself" to each other. :-D
 
2014-02-01 02:28:33 AM  

Bathia_Mapes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 475x355]

This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT

[a.abcnews.com image 850x478]
Barbara Bush, his mother


So, you're saying that Bush's mom is still available?
 
2014-02-01 02:29:47 AM  

fusillade762: Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Barb Bush Sr drove home from the hospital with a terminal fetus (GW's brother) in a jar. True story.

I thought that was one of the Romney clan?


I wouldn't be surprised if it was both
 
2014-02-01 02:30:13 AM  

Ed Grubermann: jso2897: The killer awoke before dawn, and he put his boots on..........

He went into the room where the president lived...


I mean, shiat, man - this whole story - not TOO Oedipal, eh? :D
 
2014-02-01 02:30:21 AM  

Bathia_Mapes: Oldiron_79: Bathia_Mapes: This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT


Barbara Bush, his mother

Why not both?

Ok I just threw up in my mouth saying that one

Okay, now imagine former First Ladies Barbara Bush & Nancy Reagan singing the Divinyls song "I Touch Myself" to each other. :-D


You just got that whole evil empress thing going tonight, don't you?

/that should be classified as mental torture
 
2014-02-01 02:33:40 AM  

Bathia_Mapes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 475x355]

This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT

[a.abcnews.com image 850x478]
Barbara Bush, his mother


Ooooh! That makes a lot more sense. I would totally dismember someone to hit that. It's kind of odd that she would be into that sort of thing, though. Normally chicks aren't into you cutting their dads to pieces.
 
2014-02-01 02:37:05 AM  
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-02-01 02:37:30 AM  

Bathia_Mapes: Oldiron_79: Bathia_Mapes: This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT


Barbara Bush, his mother

Why not both?

Ok I just threw up in my mouth saying that one

Okay, now imagine former First Ladies Barbara Bush & Nancy Reagan singing the Divinyls song "I Touch Myself" to each other. :-D


Oh. My. God.

Why?  o.O


Nightmares...
 
2014-02-01 02:42:38 AM  
Just to be fair, Grandma Bush was a hell of a looker in her youth.  Saw some TV special where H.W. was showing off the picture of her that he was carrying when his plane went down during the war or something like that.
 
2014-02-01 02:45:30 AM  

That Guy Jeff: Bathia_Mapes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 475x355]

This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT

[a.abcnews.com image 850x478]
Barbara Bush, his mother

Ooooh! That makes a lot more sense. I would totally dismember someone to hit that. It's kind of odd that she would be into that sort of thing, though. Normally chicks aren't into you cutting their dads to pieces.


cdn.crushable.com
 
2014-02-01 02:45:41 AM  

MaudlinMutantMollusk: You just got that whole evil empress thing going tonight, don't you?


:-D
 
2014-02-01 02:48:13 AM  

srhp29: UNAUTHORIZED FINGER: Bathia_Mapes: [cdn.breitbart.com image 475x355]

This Barbara Bush, George W Bush's daughter


NOT

[a.abcnews.com image 850x478]
Barbara Bush, his mother

I never understood how those two could be twins. Their family tree must look like a freeway cloverleaf.

You don't really get that not all twins are of the same egg and sperm, right?


Yes I get it. I was casting a joke upon barren ground.
 
2014-02-01 02:53:01 AM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: Barb Bush Sr drove home from the hospital with a terminal fetus (GW's brother) in a jar. True story.


And yet....

When she got home...
She noticed that the fetus was moving...
She suckled it on her bosom until it grew...

If you thought GWB was bad...

/coming to a theater near you
 
2014-02-01 02:53:09 AM  
Bathia_Mapes: Okay, now imagine former First Ladies Barbara Bush & Nancy Reagan singing the Divinyls song "I Touch Myself" to each other. :-D

Huh... thought I was all fapped out, but gave me my second wind.  I'll be in my presidential bunker.
 
2014-02-01 02:54:17 AM  
Maybe the guy didn't know you don't need dad's permission these days.
 
2014-02-01 02:54:19 AM  
At a preliminary hearing, Assistant U.S. Attorney Andrea Griswold told U.S. Magistrate Judge Henry Pitman the government believes Smith was referring to the former president's daughter and not Bush's mother, who shares the same name.

Citation needed. Lacks foundation.
 
2014-02-01 03:00:53 AM  
She looks way too much like her father. Too disturbing.
 
2014-02-01 03:08:56 AM  
i60.tinypic.com

But didn't he have one of those damn security badges? What a farce this will never make it to trial.

i61.tinypic.com
 
Displayed 50 of 104 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report