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(Telegraph)   Lorde doesn't like the lecherous gaze of the music industry on her nubile, taut, firm body   (telegraph.co.uk ) divider line
    More: Obvious, Grammys, North Shore, manufacturing  
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9902 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 30 Jan 2014 at 10:15 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



154 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-01-30 09:38:57 AM  
She needs a little smack on the bum.
 
2014-01-30 09:50:46 AM  
Is there another Lorde that I haven't heard of, because the one I've seen is a borderline chubby, forgettable-looking teen, albeit one with a great voice and talent.
 
2014-01-30 09:56:48 AM  

Timmy the Tumor: borderline chubby, forgettable-looking teen,


static.tumblr.com
 
2014-01-30 10:00:37 AM  

DarkJohnson: Timmy the Tumor: borderline chubby, forgettable-looking teen,

[static.tumblr.com image 381x578]


was that before or after this


www.eonline.com
 
mhd
2014-01-30 10:17:41 AM  
Wat?
i.imgur.com
 
2014-01-30 10:20:55 AM  
What's that word for when you complain about something that doesn't actually exist?
 
2014-01-30 10:21:09 AM  
a song about feeling alienated from the luxury lifestyle promoted by popular culture.
The artist, who hails from Auckland's affluent North Shore


Hrm

Maybe don't do magazine covers and attend awards shows if you don't like this end of the industry. Plenty of dives to play in.
 
2014-01-30 10:21:12 AM  
Shut up and go back to sleep on your pile of hundred dollar bills and everything will be all right.
 
2014-01-30 10:21:59 AM  
Awww, look! The singing jailbait thought we cared about its thoughts! How adorbs!
 
2014-01-30 10:22:04 AM  
Who?
 
2014-01-30 10:22:46 AM  

Timmy the Tumor: DarkJohnson: Timmy the Tumor: borderline chubby, forgettable-looking teen,

[static.tumblr.com image 381x578]

was that before or after this


[www.eonline.com image 634x1024]


You realize that's what a normal person is supposed to look like, right? Are normal people no longer attractive?
 
2014-01-30 10:24:05 AM  

Cthulhu_is_my_homeboy: Who?


Your mamma.
 
2014-01-30 10:26:17 AM  
She's math class pretty.
 
2014-01-30 10:26:23 AM  

baconbeard: What's that word for when you complain about something that doesn't actually exist?


FarkForums?
 
2014-01-30 10:27:36 AM  

Timmy the Tumor: Is there another Lorde that I haven't heard of, because the one I've seen is a borderline chubby, forgettable-looking teen, albeit one with a great voice and talent.


Without professional makeup, wardrobe, and digital alterations, 99.999% of all humans are forgettable-looking.
 
2014-01-30 10:34:38 AM  

someonelse: Timmy the Tumor: Is there another Lorde that I haven't heard of, because the one I've seen is a borderline chubby, forgettable-looking teen, albeit one with a great voice and talent.

Without professional makeup, wardrobe, and digital alterations, 99.999% of all humans are forgettable-looking.


I know I am.

As for you white knights, Lorde probably isn't going to sleep with you, no matter how you defend her.
 
2014-01-30 10:37:09 AM  

Timmy the Tumor: Is there another Lorde that I haven't heard of, because the one I've seen is a borderline chubby, forgettable-looking teen, albeit one with a great voice and talent.


She's become somewhat willowy and is doing a Goth thing these days.
 
2014-01-30 10:37:23 AM  

Cthulhu_is_my_homeboy: Who?


To the gossip sites. You have to read all of them in reverse alphabetical order now. Not for not knowing who she is (I'd never heard of her until yesterday) but for using that stupid meme.
 
2014-01-30 10:42:56 AM  
You should talk to Fiona Apple about that angle before you buy into it, sweetie.
 
2014-01-30 10:44:34 AM  
She's 17.
 
2014-01-30 10:46:55 AM  

verbaltoxin: She's 17.


So? That's when they are at their most nubile, taut, and firm.
 
2014-01-30 10:47:19 AM  
Shut up and dance, monkey.  All we want is to be entertained, so just put on the funny hat and hold out the tin cup.

Seriously--who takes the opinions of celebrities for more than what they're worth?  We all have the same cross section of opinions, except they have microphones.  And celebrities are almost always undereducated twits.

www.hawtcelebs.com
 
2014-01-30 10:47:58 AM  

Fubini: Timmy the Tumor: DarkJohnson: Timmy the Tumor: borderline chubby, forgettable-looking teen,

[static.tumblr.com image 381x578]

was that before or after this


[www.eonline.com image 634x1024]

You realize that's what a normal person is supposed to look like, right? Are normal people no longer attractive?


Normal people were never attractive to begin with. At least not universally.
 
2014-01-30 10:48:17 AM  
She looks odd for some reason. Would still penis it though.
 
2014-01-30 10:51:32 AM  
That song is farking terrible, just be thankful it's made you famous and wealthy.
 
2014-01-30 10:52:22 AM  

baconbeard: Normal people were never attractive to begin with. At least not universally.


I dunno. Average faces are attractive. Does someone have to be airbrushed for you to find them attractive?
 
2014-01-30 10:56:22 AM  
She doesn't owe you a hard-on, dumbf*cks.
 
2014-01-30 11:06:43 AM  

H31N0US: You should talk to Fiona Apple about that angle before you buy into it, sweetie.


Or, from a recent Fark thread, Thora Birch.
 
2014-01-30 11:07:48 AM  
That website brings up lovely pop-ups trying to hoist malware on your machine.  No thank you.  I will just have to get my celebrity biatching from some other more worth journalistic outlet.
 
2014-01-30 11:07:49 AM  
Sorry, Lorde. This is what you get:

i.imgur.com
 
2014-01-30 11:08:08 AM  

Fubini: Timmy the Tumor: DarkJohnson: Timmy the Tumor: borderline chubby, forgettable-looking teen,

[static.tumblr.com image 381x578]

was that before or after this


[www.eonline.com image 634x1024]

You realize that's what a normal person is supposed to look like, right? Are normal people no longer attractive?


you can always tell the people on fark that have spent too much time watching certain entertainment features on the internet.  They don't know what real people in un-retouched photos look like.
 
bav
2014-01-30 11:08:08 AM  

mhd: Wat?
[i.imgur.com image 453x640]


Thanks!  Came here for this, leaving satisfied.

\m/ \m/
 
2014-01-30 11:08:28 AM  

GameSprocket: Or, from a recent Fark thread, Thora Birch.


Even her huge fun bags couldn't keep her career afloat.
 
2014-01-30 11:10:37 AM  

Yanks_RSJ: That song is farking terrible, just be thankful it's made you famous and wealthy.


Seriously? It's pretty good, and her vocals are great. Although, it became wildly popular for a time, so I guess you're playing the inevitable backlash role.
 
2014-01-30 11:11:40 AM  

Blues_X: She doesn't owe you a hard-on, dumbf*cks.


Of course she does. She's a celebrity. We created her. We can also destroy her by the simple act of ignoring her. She's our dancing monkey, and if she wants to remain relevant, she'd better keep dancing.
 
2014-01-30 11:13:27 AM  

MayoSlather: Yanks_RSJ: That song is farking terrible, just be thankful it's made you famous and wealthy.

Seriously? It's pretty good, and her vocals are great. Although, it became wildly popular for a time, so I guess you're playing the inevitable backlash role.


I mostly listen to classic country and podcasts, but I heard this song a lot when my wife was driving. I have to admit that it was at least a unique sound. I appreciate someone who comes out with something different.
 
2014-01-30 11:14:58 AM  

fickenchucker: Shut up and dance, monkey.  All we want is to be entertained, so just put on the funny hat and hold out the tin cup.

Seriously--who takes the opinions of celebrities for more than what they're worth?  We all have the same cross section of opinions, except they have microphones.  And celebrities are almost always undereducated twits.

[www.hawtcelebs.com image 850x1275]


I read that word without the "w" and when matched with your pic still made sense
 
2014-01-30 11:15:25 AM  
Well you can always get a job scrubbing toilets to be treated more human.
 
2014-01-30 11:16:51 AM  

MayoSlather: Yanks_RSJ: That song is farking terrible, just be thankful it's made you famous and wealthy.

Seriously? It's pretty good, and her vocals are great. Although, it became wildly popular for a time, so I guess you're playing the inevitable backlash role.


Yes, seriously.  My opinion is that the song is awful.  I hate it, and have hated it from the first time I heard it.

Others may feel differently.
 
2014-01-30 11:17:43 AM  

Yanks_RSJ: That song is farking terrible, just be thankful it's made you famous and wealthy.


Oh, come on.  It's not bad for a pop song.  It's 800 million times better than "Locked Out of Heaven" or anything by Rihanna.
 
2014-01-30 11:20:11 AM  

Yanks_RSJ: My opinion is that the song is awful.  I hate it, and have hated it from the first time I heard it.


So much this.
 
2014-01-30 11:22:01 AM  

mhd: Wat?
[i.imgur.com image 453x640]



24.media.tumblr.com
 
2014-01-30 11:22:23 AM  
In two years, after her next album tanks, she' ll be begging for the attention.
 
2014-01-30 11:24:04 AM  
Since I have kids older than her, I can't look at her as anything other than a child. And as much as it pains me to admit it, I kind of like her music.
 
2014-01-30 11:28:39 AM  

GameSprocket: MayoSlather: Yanks_RSJ: That song is farking terrible, just be thankful it's made you famous and wealthy.

Seriously? It's pretty good, and her vocals are great. Although, it became wildly popular for a time, so I guess you're playing the inevitable backlash role.

I mostly listen to classic country and podcasts, but I heard this song a lot when my wife was driving. I have to admit that it was at least a unique sound. I appreciate someone who comes out with something different.


Not sure what's so unique about it. She's basically a less edgy version of Sia.
 
2014-01-30 11:30:08 AM  
As far as her complaints about being famous goes. She chose that path. There's plenty of musicians who have remained more or less obscure, while still managing to make a decent living at it.
 
2014-01-30 11:33:04 AM  

LectertheChef: GameSprocket: MayoSlather: Yanks_RSJ: That song is farking terrible, just be thankful it's made you famous and wealthy.

Seriously? It's pretty good, and her vocals are great. Although, it became wildly popular for a time, so I guess you're playing the inevitable backlash role.

I mostly listen to classic country and podcasts, but I heard this song a lot when my wife was driving. I have to admit that it was at least a unique sound. I appreciate someone who comes out with something different.

Not sure what's so unique about it. She's basically a less edgy version of Sia.


Well, I have no idea who Sia is. Lorde's song was just the one that came on my wife's radio and caught my attention. Most of the rest is just over processed noise.
 
2014-01-30 11:35:25 AM  

Sybarite: mhd: Wat?
[i.imgur.com image 453x640]


[24.media.tumblr.com image 500x500]



Needs moar googly eyes.
 
2014-01-30 11:38:02 AM  

LectertheChef: As far as her complaints about being famous goes. She chose that path. There's plenty of musicians who have remained more or less obscure, while still managing to make a decent living at it.


She could cut, straighten and dye her hair, maybe throw on a pair of glasses and nobody would recognize her.  She'll be fine.  Or she could pay for a limo to take her wherever she wants to go for the rest of her life.
 
2014-01-30 11:47:23 AM  
Never heard of her prior to the Fark headline.
*gis*
When she's 18, fist, angry god, etc.
 
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