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(Chicago Trib)   Men who took $60k of laundry detergent come clean after find themselves in hot water. Mastermind hangs them out to dry   (chicagotribune.com) divider line 31
    More: Dumbass, laundry detergents, Orland Park, hot water, Bolingbrook, loading dock  
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2421 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Jan 2014 at 3:06 PM (46 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



31 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-01-28 02:31:18 PM  
They were probably unloading the cargo so that they could fill the truck with explosives and get all terroristy.

The guy on the left is from Ramallah, from his facebook page...
www.trbimg.com
https://www.facebook.com/omar.daraghma.7
https://www.facebook.com/theaier.kartoum
 
2014-01-28 03:01:38 PM  
Seriously. How hard is it to proofread a headline before submitting it?
 
2014-01-28 03:08:28 PM  
Here comes a tide of stupid puns. They will all suck.
 
2014-01-28 03:10:47 PM  
g-ecx.images-amazon.com
I hated that game.
/I wish I could bleach it from my mind
 
2014-01-28 03:10:49 PM  

Fo Shiz: They were probably unloading the cargo so that they could fill the truck with explosives and get all terroristy.

The guy on the left is from Ramallah, from his facebook page...
[www.trbimg.com image 600x338]
https://www.facebook.com/omar.daraghma.7
https://www.facebook.com/theaier.kartoum


Good idea.  I was tempted to just write this off as a simple theft, but now I can post this on FB and terrify my elderly relatives.
 
2014-01-28 03:14:28 PM  
Mr. Bean and Alfred E. Neuman are working together to steal laundry detergent?

Oh, well. If there is one thing Americans love it is stories about dumbass criminals who get caught because they are dumbasses.

Dumbasses.

By the way, I still don't understand why street people are using stolen Tide  as a currency. Can you make crack with it or something? Can it get you high as well as whiter than white or whatever?
 
2014-01-28 03:15:09 PM  

shanrick: Seriously. How hard is it to proofread a headline before submitting it?


Or for a mod to fix it.
 
2014-01-28 03:16:55 PM  
Thought they would make a clean get away.
 
2014-01-28 03:19:44 PM  
$60,000 would do my laundry for a year. Provided it was in Loonies and quarters.

Just kidding.

At $4.50 to wash and dry a load, it would do 13,333 loads, which works out to about 200 years worth of laundry assuming I washed my linens and sweaters more often.
 
2014-01-28 03:20:01 PM  

brantgoose: By the way, I still don't understand why street people are using stolen Tide  as a currency


Because Tide is the best. Even in the hood people like clean clothes, and the stuff gets your threads clean. Since it's pricey the big jugs can be hustled for $10 each all day, every day. No serial numbers, no magic tracking devices, and it can be stored just about anywhere.
 
2014-01-28 03:20:11 PM  

busy chillin': Here comes a tide of stupid puns. They will all suck.


I personally cheer for stupid puns. I think we stand to gain a lot from all of them.

/In this era.
 
2014-01-28 03:28:06 PM  
 
2014-01-28 03:29:36 PM  

wildcardjack: brantgoose: By the way, I still don't understand why street people are using stolen Tide  as a currency

Because Tide is the best. Even in the hood people like clean clothes, and the stuff gets your threads clean. Since it's pricey the big jugs can be hustled for $10 each all day, every day. No serial numbers, no magic tracking devices, and it can be stored just about anywhere.


Is this actually a thing that's happening? Literal money laundering?
 
2014-01-28 03:30:49 PM  

zulius: [g-ecx.images-amazon.com image 212x500]
I hated that game.
/I wish I could bleach it from my mind


We had it on my parents' boat. It never got played. As a ten or twelve year old, I couldn't even figure out what you were supposed to do with it.

Pegs. I remember it had pegs.
 
2014-01-28 03:32:47 PM  
They needed it for money laundering.
 
2014-01-28 03:33:16 PM  

brantgoose: By the way, I still don't understand why street people are using stolen Tide as a currency.


Some folks take "dirty money" way too literally..
 
2014-01-28 03:38:05 PM  

Arkanaut: wildcardjack: brantgoose: By the way, I still don't understand why street people are using stolen Tide  as a currency

Because Tide is the best. Even in the hood people like clean clothes, and the stuff gets your threads clean. Since it's pricey the big jugs can be hustled for $10 each all day, every day. No serial numbers, no magic tracking devices, and it can be stored just about anywhere.

Is this actually a thing that's happening? Literal money laundering?


I Googled it because I was a bit surprised, and, yep, it's definitely a thing.

Makes perfect sense to.  Baby formula in stores always has security cameras and they put the most expensive stuff in lock up or behind counters.

Printer ink has security tags and is usually in lock boxes.

So why not detergent?
 
2014-01-28 03:38:37 PM  

busy chillin': Here comes a tide of stupid puns. They will all suck.


lol. when there is little work, some people will try to steal stuff, and make a clean get away. duh
 
2014-01-28 03:40:33 PM  
It wouldn't be a trip through south Chicago if you didn't stop for a $10 five- gallon bucket of laundry detergent from Lever Bros employees.

And tamales. Oh lord yes, the tamales.
 
2014-01-28 03:42:49 PM  
Actually, subby, they can find themselves in water that is hot, warm, or cold.
 
2014-01-28 03:46:20 PM  

Glitchwerks: Arkanaut: wildcardjack: brantgoose: By the way, I still don't understand why street people are using stolen Tide  as a currency

Because Tide is the best. Even in the hood people like clean clothes, and the stuff gets your threads clean. Since it's pricey the big jugs can be hustled for $10 each all day, every day. No serial numbers, no magic tracking devices, and it can be stored just about anywhere.

Is this actually a thing that's happening? Literal money laundering?

I Googled it because I was a bit surprised, and, yep, it's definitely a thing.

Makes perfect sense to.  Baby formula in stores always has security cameras and they put the most expensive stuff in lock up or behind counters.

Printer ink has security tags and is usually in lock boxes.

So why not detergent?


Interesting... I thought these guys were just stealing to sell stuff to cheap corner stores or something.

I wonder if these thieves' clothing is really clean, or really dirty because they're hoarding all their detergent.
 
2014-01-28 03:49:30 PM  

busy chillin': Here comes a tide of stupid puns. They will all suck.


Welcome to a new era of unfunniness that will be wisked in by a tide of groans large enough one can almost surf.  The only gain we can hope to attain will be to snuggle up with the great value of the information we can learn, and not shout about it.
 
2014-01-28 03:51:50 PM  

busy chillin': Here comes a tide of stupid puns. They will all suck.


I don't see what you would have to gain by making such a negative statement. Some of the puns might be fab, I might even cheer for them.
 
2014-01-28 03:55:36 PM  

brantgoose: Mr. Bean and Alfred E. Neuman are working together to steal laundry detergent?

Oh, well. If there is one thing Americans love it is stories about dumbass criminals who get caught because they are dumbasses.

Dumbasses.

By the way, I still don't understand why street people are using stolen Tide  as a currency. Can you make crack with it or something? Can it get you high as well as whiter than white or whatever?


Fo Shiz: Maybe it was Tide?
http://nymag.com/news/features/tide-detergent-drugs-2013-1/

~

Came here to regale you all with tales of how Tide is a currency in the 'hood.


busy chillin':
Here comes a tide of stupid puns. They will all suck.
~

Missed that the first time around.. and I was looking for Tide references. Good doogz!
 
2014-01-28 04:13:48 PM  
There was something to Gain with the theft, but the Tide had changed. The cops will Wisk then to jail where they will have to work hard to have Cheer. The long Arm & Hammer of the law will make them Pure again.
 
2014-01-28 04:29:56 PM  

cowgirl toffee: There was something to Gain with the theft, but the Tide had changed. The cops will Wisk then to jail where they will have to work hard to have Cheer. The long Arm & Hammer of the law will make them Pure again.


Ancient Chinese secret!
 
2014-01-28 04:42:38 PM  

Fo Shiz: They were probably unloading the cargo so that they could fill the truck with explosives and get all terroristy.


Of course; that's the most likely explanation.
 
2014-01-28 05:08:04 PM  

MattyBlast: Actually, subby, they can find themselves in water that is hot, warm, or cold.


"At home, your dial has three settings, doesn't it? 'Hot', 'warm', and 'cold'. But then you go to the laundrette, and the dial has all the letters of the alphabet, no explanation. So you're left going, 'I think I'll have an 'H' wash today...'"

// Eddie Izzard, from memory
// apartment buildings with coin-operated (or card-operated) washer/dryers are great big scams, especially if "all utilities are included"
 
2014-01-28 07:41:44 PM  
Came here to talk about how Tide theft is rampant in the hood. See that it's clearly been covered.
 
2014-01-28 08:11:57 PM  

jayphat: Came here to talk about how Tide theft is rampant in the hood. See that it's clearly been covered.


Orland Park is kind of far from the 'hood.
 
2014-01-28 08:27:02 PM  
1) You're hired to steal a semi-trailer
2) Steal the tractor to haul it
3) Pay guys $100 to empty the trailer
....

Profit!
 
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