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(   Iowa duck hunter shoots other hunters duck decoys in bizarre incident. Charged with "terrorism".   ( divider line
    More: Strange  
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5052 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Dec 2001 at 5:03 PM (15 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

53 Comments     (+0 »)

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2001-12-06 05:09:08 PM  
Then he has already won.
2001-12-06 05:09:46 PM  
LOL.....all I can say is LOL.....

or word....Iowa..
2001-12-06 05:10:11 PM  
Love the ad for "THE IOWA AFGHAN" too. Hmmm....
2001-12-06 05:10:23 PM  
Dead duck.
2001-12-06 05:11:19 PM  
2001-12-06 05:11:32 PM  
I am not the pheasant plucker.
I am the pheasant plucker's son.
I am only plucking pheasants
Until the pheasant plucker comes.
2001-12-06 05:13:05 PM  
Jeez, farked at only 114?

2001-12-06 05:14:45 PM  
This is the type of stupid shiat that happens when a person like John Ashcroft is our Attorney General. Terrorism? Please. It's just some stupid hunter that should be charged with pulling a weapon on someone.
2001-12-06 05:21:12 PM  
I hope he gets those 10 years.
2001-12-06 05:22:58 PM  
If he kills ducks then he deserves to die. The farking sick son of a biatch.
2001-12-06 05:24:13 PM  
Better yet, it woulda been nice if he shot one of the other guys, then they all just killed each other.
2001-12-06 05:26:12 PM  
2001-12-06 05:35:14 PM  
I suppose that this means that we'll be bombing Iowa for harboring terrorists?

2001-12-06 05:35:59 PM  
No, bomb it for harboring Duck killers
2001-12-06 05:38:56 PM  
[image from too old to be available]
2001-12-06 05:42:49 PM  
Duck.... YUM!
2001-12-06 05:46:37 PM  
Djrezin8's babies... YUM!
2001-12-06 05:48:23 PM  
I hope he gets a secret military tribunal and secret military execution like he deserves. Terrorists don't deserve the rights of the Constitution!
2001-12-06 06:15:20 PM  
*sniff* hmmm.... *sniff sniff* I think I smell a troll....
2001-12-06 06:27:25 PM  
Alright, Jimtess was likely overstating the problem, but I sincerely doubt that this was what the definition of "terrorism" was supposed to include. Did the guy do something wrong - hell yeah; I don't think it's attempted murder, but it's definitely an act of violence, brandishing, etc., and he should do some time.
2001-12-06 06:34:47 PM  
Doctor: he tried to kill some ducks for farks sake. His sole intention on that day was to end the life of a duck. What greater crime then this is there?
Talk about not being able to see the wood for the trees...
(this is not meant to be humourous.. I'm deadly serious)
2001-12-06 06:47:51 PM  
He didn't do anything to anyone.. he shot their DECOYS fer christ sake.

Everyone is so god damn quick to call anyone who does anything a terrorist.
2001-12-06 06:49:15 PM  
Duck fetish?
2001-12-06 06:50:59 PM  
Did you read it? I wasn't there, but it clearly says that he pointed his weapon at the other hunters.
2001-12-06 06:57:36 PM  
Skizza... It's just a farking DUCK! I've killed thousands in my years of hunting... If you like ducks that much, I'll send you one... I have a few in the freezer!
2001-12-06 07:08:13 PM  
Doctor: you bet... I'm still buzzing off that massive duck penis story (anyone who make a fark-a-duck joke at this point is clearly a comic genius)

Gregory Ledet: You're going straight to hell you heartless farking murderer. Don't get me wrong.. I'm not a vegan PETA cnut.. I'll happily hunt down and kill almost any animal... but not ducks. They are special. Why? because they're ducks.
There.. hope I've cleared up that little misunderstanding.
2001-12-06 07:08:29 PM  
Xanthier, it's not our call, the state of Iowa is who's holding him on "terrorism" charges.

2001-12-06 07:12:09 PM  
well Skizza when you take a shower in the morning, you do so with the intent of killing millions upon millions of various micro organisms. Your sole intention is ending the life of not one, but millions, perhaps billions of living beings!!! What greater crime then this is there? you evil evil person!
2001-12-06 07:21:13 PM  
Natix: like I said... I'll happily kill just about any animal (maybe not monkeys or dolphins though) and I love eating meat. But not ducks. They are ducks. Their being ducks is self evident and this is reason enough to repect them as ducks.
When will you people understand?
2001-12-06 07:44:10 PM  

Skizza you need therapy...

ya go buddy...

2001-12-06 08:01:07 PM  
Aarowyn: Thanks for the advise... but I do tend to maintain a platonic relationship with ducks... I don't actually find them sexually attractive (apart from this one cute little mallard who used to live... err... forget that bit), i just respect them as the only creature that has surpassed mankind in evolutionary terms. All of the evidence points to it... their ability to fly AND to swim... their complex social interactions (do you know of a single scientist who has claimed to decode the duck language?) and of couse, their strong influence on human affairs that only I and a few elite government officials know about.

On a more serious note: your link states that between 1 and 65% of males attempt bestiality. 65 FARKING PERCENT? what are the other 35% doing?
2001-12-06 08:15:46 PM  
between 1 and 65%
WTF? That's got to be the most vague statistic I've ever seen! They might as well have just made the whole thing up.

I mean- it's not that ... uh.... I'm not like defending .. shiat... animal sex crimes.. or ... um anything
2001-12-06 08:48:15 PM  
Skizza, your a damn idiot.

Ducks are so farking dumb, if you put something that looks even CLOSE to an egg by their nest they will sit on it with the rest of their eggs. It doesn't even have to be round. The stupid farking things would take a blue cube of wood, and sit on it like an egg. They lack any sort of reasoning ability that is not absolutely neccessary to maintain its life. Ducks are dumb, simple as that.
2001-12-06 08:57:51 PM  
If the terrorists can't waste their ammo on our decoys, then the ducks have already won. Shoot me now...i cant believe i said that
2001-12-06 08:59:53 PM  
Obviously an act of terrorism, otherwise he wouldn't be charged with it.
2001-12-06 09:02:26 PM  
Tre_bumpn: three points:

One: If you put anything that looks even CLOSE to a human being (ie a doll) next to a young child it will interact with it as if it's a real human being. This is not because of any lack of reasoning ability but more due to an advanced imagination... only possible through the posession of a powerful intellect. The same as Ducks.

Two: "i'm 21. i'm male. I like music, all things supernatural, art (mostly drawing) I like to do recreational drugs, go to concerts, and avoid having responsibilities of real life." Have you ever met an irresponsible duck? or one that takes drugs? (Insert smoking "quack" joke here) No - they are too sensible.

Three: Why the fark were you hanging around ducks trying to fool them with non-round objects?
2001-12-06 09:43:40 PM  
I wasn't! LOL
It was on the discovery channel!

First off, don't assume that because i don't want to work nine to five like a slave, and get high sometimes that i am a fool. I spend a lot of my time educating myself in the things that interest me.

Secondly, There are many other small brained animals that act in a very similar manner. They only have the reasoning abilitys that will keep them alive and procreating. You seem to think there is something "special" about ducks, either that or you are just trolling message boards trying to make people think you are a nut.

Your first point comparing ducks to a child is irrevelant. A mature duck acts in this manner. Now surely if you placed a doll next to a mature human they wouldn't start playing with it. They would ask you "what the hell you are doing with a doll" and "get the fark away from me".

Finally, you will find (if you care to) that there are many smaller brained animals that act in a very odd manner. Its really quite interesting. They do this because they can't waste energy doing things that aren't neccessary. This isn't always reasoning, but mostly.
2001-12-06 09:45:21 PM  
man, i look at your bio after wasting my time typing all that out. FARK! Its very obvious to me your just farking with people.
2001-12-06 09:53:40 PM  
And in another case of context-based banner ads gone horribly wrong, this ad was at the top of the page for me.
[image from too old to be available]

Remember, when discussing terrorism in Iowa, don't forget Iowa Afghans.
2001-12-06 09:58:03 PM  
Skizza: In your bio you say "I like ducks and one day hope to own one". You hope to own something with such a high intellect? If you can own it, I can eat it. YUMMY!

As for the article-- it didn't say anywhere that the "terrorism" charges weren't on the books before the crime was committed. If this prosecution was based on newly passed law, I think that would be the headline.
2001-12-06 10:15:08 PM  
Duck Slaughterhouse
[image from too old to be available]
2001-12-06 10:17:23 PM  
i'd be terrified if anyone shot in my direction but that wouldn't mean that they were terrorists. well it would but not the way that word had been used since 9/11. it would be interesting to see just how the law they used defines "terorist" and when it was passed.
2001-12-06 10:17:37 PM  
That is THE best photoshop I've ever seen!
2001-12-06 10:21:05 PM  
its asinine that he was charged with terrorism over that.
2001-12-06 10:22:23 PM  
ducks, you white people reeally make me laugh
2001-12-06 10:32:58 PM  
You people are really stupid.
2001-12-06 10:51:34 PM  
First, Skizza is obviously just having fun as a troll. You fed him.

As for the "terrorism" charge, it isn't one in the sense of 9/11. People have been charged with committing acts or making threats termed "terroristic", or to cause fear, for many years. Pointing a gun at someone and shooting their property to cause them to run away scared falls under this definition. He isn't going to be taken to one of the "special" interrogation rooms and held without charges or bail. He won't be prosecuted in the manner that a participant in 9/11 would. His crime would have been the same on 9/10, just that the word "terroristic" has been corrupted. His act was clearly illegal and meant to intimidate the other hunters, but he won't be charged and prosecuted the same as someone who destroys buildings.
2001-12-06 11:01:44 PM  
Aww, and I thought running into buildings was still just considered a class-C felony.
2001-12-06 11:49:50 PM  
I live in Des Moines, Iowa. The Register and the local news stations are notorious for their inflammatory, groundless stories meant only to scare the local citizenry into submission. The city planners are busy trying to knock down an historical landmark building in order to put in a park. Recently, a large warehouse was demolished, while the City Council says that downtown Des Moines needs eclectic urban housing to draw more people into the shrinking city tax base. This whole state is phucked up.
2001-12-07 01:11:27 AM  
animal sex crimes.. or ... um anything

Why are they "crimes" anyway? Seriously, you can eat a cow, but you can't fark one? How the hell is it the government's business, what sort of disgusting things I might do on my own time?

Or is this some moronic PETA thing? I personally can't think of anything more "ethical" than giving some sheep or dolphin some sweet lovin'

Not that I like farking animals, but I'd like to know I had the option!
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