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(Sydney Morning Herald)   Man walks into a bar, "what, this? Oh that's where a shark just bit me. I had to stitch up the wounds myself. Two beers, please"   (smh.com.au) divider line 21
    More: Hero  
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6829 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Jan 2014 at 9:20 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



21 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-01-27 09:22:01 AM  
With helpful picture of what a shark might look like.
 
2014-01-27 09:22:20 AM  
Skoora?
 
2014-01-27 09:22:52 AM  
I would think the risk of infection from a shark bite would be pretty high-but this guy probably poured gasoline on it before he sewed it up.
 
2014-01-27 09:25:34 AM  

mr_a: I would think the risk of infection from a shark bite would be pretty high-but this guy probably poured gasoline on it before he sewed it up.


Poured gasoline on it, lit it, and then sewed it up once it went out.
 
2014-01-27 09:25:36 AM  
What is the punch line? This joke sucks.
 
2014-01-27 09:29:06 AM  
Man walks into a bar and says, "QUICK! Pour me a shot of tequila! Quick, quick, quick, Oh my God! Oh my God!"  So the bartender quickly pours him a shot and the man downs it immediately. "Another! Another! Quick, quick, quick, another shot!", the man cries, slapping his hand on the bar. The bartender complies, as the man gasps, "One more, One more shot! Oh my God, Oh my God!". As the bartender pours the third shot of tequila, the man grabs it and downs it. "Are you okay, mister?", the bartender asks.

"I'll be okay now," the man replies, "But you'd do the same thing if you had what I have."

"What do you have?"

"Seventy-five cents."
 
2014-01-27 09:34:09 AM  
Physician, heal thyself.
 
2014-01-27 09:41:34 AM  
Did he need an extra barstool on each side for his giant brass testicles?
 
2014-01-27 09:57:07 AM  
FTA: "Junior doctor James Grant was spearfishing with friends near Colac Bay at the base of the South Island on Saturday when he was attacked by what he believed was a sevengill shark. "

The less douchey relative of the Massengill shark?
 
2014-01-27 10:04:34 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-01-27 10:19:26 AM  
Australia?

*checks link source*

Australia.
 
2014-01-27 10:28:32 AM  
Was he also quoted as saying, "that's not a knife....."
 
2014-01-27 10:32:29 AM  

Bondith: Australia?

*checks link source*

Australia.


And this is what happens when we don't rtfa. Let it be a lesson to you all.
 
2014-01-27 10:34:21 AM  
www.wearysloth.com

Wanted for questioning
 
2014-01-27 10:35:36 AM  

ChubbyTiger: Bondith: Australia?

*checks link source*

Australia.

And this is what happens when we don't rtfa. Let it be a lesson to you all.


*reads TFA*

Well, bugger.

News outlets in one country can report news that happens into another country?  Amazing!
 
2014-01-27 11:08:39 AM  
"That story gets better every time ya tell it, Wally!"
Donk approves
 
2014-01-27 11:53:49 AM  
"Pub" Austrailian for ER
 
2014-01-27 12:46:27 PM  
Science time: Sharks don't have hands. I know, shocker. They explore things with their teeth... a shark "attack", especially like this, is usually just a shark trying to figure out what a person is.

http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2004/01/0123_040123_tvgreatw hi teshark.html
 
2014-01-27 02:20:04 PM  
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-01-27 08:03:30 PM  
Afterwards, he burned through every whorehouse in town, strangled a bear, ate it raw, drank some whiskey, and took a quick power nap. And promptly kicked the shark in the balls.
 
2014-01-27 09:15:03 PM  

Torgo_of_Manos: [www.wearysloth.com image 320x240]

Wanted for questioning


Donk? Is that you?
 
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