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(GodTube)   Megachurch pastor who's currently building a million dollar home and whose church brings in over $300,000 per week, posts a video message to the "haters" telling them that "their day is done"   (godtube.com ) divider line
    More: Dumbass  
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3877 clicks; posted to Video » on 26 Jan 2014 at 10:18 AM (2 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-01-26 10:05:25 AM  
Dumbass?  He strikes as a true believer who will never get any kind of reality check unless he is so stupid as to do any gay bathhouse stuff.  If he keeps his baser instincts in check he will live a rich life based on his senseless blatheration.
 
2014-01-26 10:22:34 AM  
Sooo.......apparently Stifler found Jeebus.
 
2014-01-26 10:25:56 AM  
That's almost 2 1/2 years old. Is this guy in jail or in a gutter yet?
 
2014-01-26 10:32:34 AM  
Until he mentions the G word, I thought he was talking about the religious right.
 
2014-01-26 10:44:11 AM  
21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?
 
2014-01-26 10:49:25 AM  
Irony tag repenting?
 
2014-01-26 11:04:08 AM  
Pastor? I kind of zoned out a bit but I don't think I heard him mention Jesus, at all.
 
2014-01-26 11:17:24 AM  

organizmx: 21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?

What he said.
If being poor is the key, I'll have no problems...

 
2014-01-26 11:17:41 AM  

organizmx: 21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?


You're kidding, right?

Man has been bending the stories in that book to their own devices/wishes/desires for a couple of millennia now.
 
2014-01-26 11:25:21 AM  
Isn't there some kind of surgery or therapy that can uncross a persons eyes? That guy must get tired of staring at the bridge of his nose all day.
 
2014-01-26 11:31:45 AM  
He must have had a moment of self truth, wrote that describing himself, then decided fark it, I'll turn it into some cheesy dreck for the flock describing worldly people. fark this guy right in the mouth.
 
2014-01-26 11:43:30 AM  
Wow.. that was a major exercise in projection
 
2014-01-26 11:47:15 AM  
"We're done with the way you sling shame and blame in the face of anyone who doesn't see what you see, say what you say, think what you think..."

And he said that with a straight face! That's some serious comedy right there.
 
2014-01-26 11:50:00 AM  
Easily the most punchable face I have seen in, well, forever.

/couple of boots to the cojones on his way down would not disappoint, either....
 
2014-01-26 11:51:50 AM  

shanrick: Isn't there some kind of surgery or therapy that can uncross a persons eyes? That guy must get tired of staring at the bridge of his nose all day.


It's no joke.
 
2014-01-26 12:03:30 PM  
Holy jeepers. That fellow looked like a cross-eyed stroke victim.  He has that used car salesman vibe..
 
2014-01-26 12:13:05 PM  

organizmx: /What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?


Most people who are cut from that cloth (religious pun intended) often skip over parts that are inconvenient for them.
 
2014-01-26 12:15:18 PM  

organizmx: 21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?


They aren't merely rich, they're doing the work of god and therefore get special considerations.  They justify leeching so much from their congregation because of those words, they're assisting their congregation.
 
2014-01-26 12:34:35 PM  

BenJammin: Until he mentions the G word, I thought he was talking about the religious right.


crotchgrabber: Irony tag repenting?


rudemix: He must have had a moment of self truth, wrote that describing himself, then decided fark it, I'll turn it into some cheesy dreck for the flock describing worldly people. fark this guy right in the mouth.


Drasancas: Wow.. that was a major exercise in projection


abhorrent1: "We're done with the way you sling shame and blame in the face of anyone who doesn't see what you see, say what you say, think what you think..."

And he said that with a straight face! That's some serious comedy right there.


THESE.

At first I was like "WAT?" but then I was like

i.imgur.com

from the hypocrisy and I had to close the video before my head a splode.
 
2014-01-26 12:49:27 PM  
Aaaamen
 
2014-01-26 12:51:53 PM  
I made it 30 seconds. What a smarmy douche.
 
2014-01-26 12:59:35 PM  
I'm suing for false advertising. It said "Ministry video", and Al Jourgensen wasn't performing in that video at all.
 
2014-01-26 01:18:24 PM  
Now why would the normally affable Joel Osteen do thi-


*clicks on link*

.......Oh. Never mind.
 
2014-01-26 01:53:02 PM  
Nit Picking ?.....That's Racist !
 
2014-01-26 02:27:03 PM  

organizmx: 21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?


Propserity gospel, of course. Mammon, in his "Rich Republican Jesus" costume, has convinced ersatz Christians that greed is good - not just that it is suitable, but also that it is an expression of positivity. Such people believe that God gives them wealth because they're worthy of it, thanks to their faith in God, without understanding that this very attitude is what shuts, not opens, the Pearly Gates.

Mammon's having a field day with these idiots. You almost want God to exist, just to hear the confused screams of millions of morons upon discovering that, no, merely confessing faith in Him and ignoring His teachings in a quest for wealth results in a sleigh ride to Hell.
 
2014-01-26 02:45:50 PM  

FormlessOne: Propserity Prosperity gospel, of course.


FTFM, of course.
 
2014-01-26 02:48:35 PM  

organizmx: 21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?


Yes.

Actually, the plan is to re-edit the bible so that it conforms with conservative ideology.

The best thing about God is that you can make him say whatever you like.
 
2014-01-26 02:48:37 PM  

Badmoodman: That's almost 2 1/2 years old. Is this guy in jail or in a gutter yet?


Nope. He's been running what is rated as one of the fastest growing ministries in the nation - in every year since 2007. Current size is 12,000 members in 9 locations. He also built a $1.7m, 16,000 square ft. house.

To Furtick's credit, his church does appear to do a significant amount of charity work.
 
2014-01-26 02:55:16 PM  

bingo the psych-o: organizmx: 21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?

Yes.

Actually, the plan is to re-edit the bible so that it conforms with conservative ideology.

The best thing about God is that you can make him say whatever you like.


Unfarkingbelievable.
 
2014-01-26 02:55:48 PM  

Minimum: organizmx: 21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?

What he said.
If being poor is the key, I'll have no problems...


I heard a comic once remark of the bible: "Anyone who's read this book knows you've done enough to go to Hell."

Doesn't Revelations (i think) say that only 144,000 people will enter heaven? And there's over 6 billion people just right now. That's a pretty hard cut to make.
 
2014-01-26 03:02:37 PM  
I'm not bashing religion here, although that guy looks and sounds retarded. His eyes and his mouth say IQ of 78.

Also, beginning your video with you getting dressed in an attempt to impress others with your taste in clothes is sooooooooooooooooo holy.
 
2014-01-26 03:13:55 PM  

Kumana Wanalaia: Minimum: organizmx: 21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?

What he said.
If being poor is the key, I'll have no problems...

I heard a comic once remark of the bible: "Anyone who's read this book knows you've done enough to go to Hell."

Doesn't Revelations (i think) say that only 144,000 people will enter heaven? And there's over 6 billion people just right now. That's a pretty hard cut to make.


So you're gonna hold up that statistic and not that six days to create the earth in that Genesis book.
 
2014-01-26 03:21:02 PM  
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2014-01-26 03:31:33 PM  
Those who follow the prosperity doctrine are worshipers of Mammon and will be forced to stand forth and account for their heresy when they die.

That is, of course, if God is real and all that crap.
 
2014-01-26 03:34:49 PM  

walktoanarcade: I'm not bashing religion here, although that guy looks and sounds retarded. His eyes and his mouth say IQ of 78.


He sounds even better with a redubbed voice (no word changes)

Hey Haters! (Max Holiday Dub) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L8SLFcOIX_Q

I also note that GodTube doesn't let you pause the video so you can make a screen capture of the many instances where "pastor" Steven Furtick's mind is shown leaving his head. Here is one from YouTube

img.fark.net
 
2014-01-26 04:07:12 PM  
Shady characters just love churches.  Some of the shadiest business people I know I've met at church.
 
2014-01-26 04:09:49 PM  
Never do business with a religious son-of-a-biatch. His word ain't worth a shiat -- not with the Good Lord telling him how to fark you on the deal.

- Shia Lebeouf
 
2014-01-26 04:12:53 PM  
What's that fuzzy alpaca talking about?
 
2014-01-26 04:16:56 PM  
Godtube?  Really?
 
2014-01-26 04:19:10 PM  
His facial contortions and body gestures look like Jim Carrey doing his Sammy Davis Jr. impression, cross eyes and all.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpy0zaB4mr4
 
2014-01-26 04:34:22 PM  

organizmx: 21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?


No, silly, they're just parables and metaphors if theyre hard.  Unless you're Francis Chan.  That guy took that one to heart. Gave up his huge house and huge salary and moved his family into a mobile home.  He does a great sick in the eye of these guys too. Something along the lines of "Imagine if I went and told my daughter to go clean her room and she said 'oh, wow, that's a good word dad, I'm going to have some friends over and we're going to have a study about what it would look like if we cleaned our rooms.'  JUST GO CLEAN YOUR ROOM!"
 
2014-01-26 04:36:53 PM  

skinbubble: Godtube?  Really?


Yeah, that was a headshaker. At this point, I'm honestly shocked that Conservatube isn't a thing. Yet.
 
2014-01-26 04:37:00 PM  
14 seconds is all i could stand of this self aggrandizing douche bag and his crappy ass video. He's a cheap hack preying on the fears of death to line his pockets, and he knows it. If you are stupid enough to pay this fool your cash, you deserve to munch on cans of cheap dog food. Wake up people, and take care of the ones you love, and don't give this shiatbag your money.
 
2014-01-26 04:47:40 PM  
I assume that it cocaine floating in the air around him.
 
2014-01-26 04:48:18 PM  
*is*
 
2014-01-26 04:49:49 PM  
Just looking at the guy screams "Con man" in my head.
 
2014-01-26 04:54:11 PM  

darch: organizmx: 21 Jesus answered, "If you want to be perfect, go, sell your possessions and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me."

22 When the young man heard this, he went away sad, because he had great wealth.

23 Then Jesus said to his disciples, "Truly I tell you, it is hard for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of heaven. 24 Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God."


/What, do they just skip this part when reading the bible?

You're kidding, right?

Man has been bending the stories in that book to their own devices/wishes/desires for a couple of millennia now.


I remember watching some old sketch comedy series, and some billionaire CEO meets a preacher, and the preacher tells him of the parable about how it's as unlikely for a rich man to enter Heaven, as it is for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle.

The billionaire is stunned by this, and the next day, pledges to donate half of his fortune...into research on how to genetically engineer a camel small enough to pass through the eye of a needle.
 
2014-01-26 04:54:31 PM  
Him look like crosseyed ebil debil to me but what do I know?
 
2014-01-26 05:32:57 PM  

Nonrepeating Rotating Binary: Just looking at the guy screams "Con man" in my head.


Meanwhile our grandmas are forking over their pensions to this shyster.
 
2014-01-26 05:38:10 PM  
i want fireflies to float around me like that when i talk too. god must really like him.
 
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