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(The Hill)   Where am I? Find out Monday - Rep. Steve Stockman (@StockmanSenate) -- Predictions to the right   ( divider line
    More: Interesting  
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2099 clicks; posted to Politics » on 24 Jan 2014 at 4:49 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-01-24 04:53:27 PM  
6 votes:
I still have $5 out on "evading federal fraud charges"
2014-01-24 04:54:59 PM  
4 votes:
Based on his "family values" positions he's more than likely been on a meth fueled rent boy binge, but it's just as likely rehab.
2014-01-24 04:17:37 PM  
4 votes:
2014-01-24 04:54:01 PM  
3 votes:
In subby's mom.  MSHA had to send in three mine rescue teams into her cavernous vagina to get him out.  Lives were lost, canaries died, but the good Representative was brought out safely.

Subby, please have your mom install guard rails around her vagina, or require that all men having intercourse with her wear a full body harness with a lanyard that's secured to a safe tie-off point.

Stockman is a sack of crap, just naming subby's mom as a convenient target.
2014-01-24 05:45:12 PM  
2 votes:

The Name: Diogenes: He found Obama's Kenyan birth certificate!

mrshowrules: He's gone to Benghazi and he's cracked the whole thing open.  Lara Logan is interviewing him right now.

In all seriousness, it's probably one of these.

Yep. He'll spout some bullshiat about one of those, and then the base will declare that any problems with his campaign finances are just because Fartbongo is trying to cover up TEH TRUTH
2014-01-24 05:17:39 PM  
2 votes:

qorkfiend: No, seriously. WTF is he talking about?

He stopped showing up for votes in the last month or so, which makes a degree of sense since he's
challenging John Cornyn for his Senate seat... except he's not campaigning either. He's gone to one campaign event in Texas and showed up in Cairo, Egypt to criticize Obama. Other than that, he's been nowhere to be found and his campaign is going even more off the rails somehow (following his doge meme advertising he photoshopped Cornyn's head on Chris Christie so he could have a picture of Cornyn hugging Obama.)
2014-01-24 05:05:22 PM  
2 votes:
2014-01-24 05:05:12 PM  
2 votes:
I don't know where he is, but I can guarantee you he will blame Obama and a certain segment of the population will nod knowingly as he does.
2014-01-24 04:51:38 PM  
2 votes:
Appalachian Trail?
2014-01-24 04:17:46 PM  
2 votes:
I don't know, but I bet it's going to involve a Guatemalan rent boy, a glory hole, and a Gene Simmons mask.
2014-01-24 08:15:24 PM  
1 vote:
I was hoping he would just stay gone.
2014-01-24 06:59:23 PM  
1 vote:
What I want to know is what we as a United Humanity can do to KEEP his lost?
2014-01-24 06:12:53 PM  
1 vote:
2014-01-24 05:57:53 PM  
1 vote:
OK, enough joking, in all seriousness, I'm going with rehab.
2014-01-24 05:46:00 PM  
1 vote:

mrshowrules: He's gone to Benghazi

I don't know if you meant that as a joke, but that is almost certainly the correct answer, considering that

1. He's obviously trying to build hype about his whereabouts, so a big media stunt is inevitable
2. He was last seen in Egypt
3. That's just the type of retarded horse shiat he would pull.

I'll be shocked if that's not where he went.  He probably has a couple of the other usual suspects with him.  Anyone seen Sheriff Joe lately?
2014-01-24 05:36:51 PM  
1 vote:
2014-01-24 05:25:06 PM  
1 vote:
It turns out Buddhists are full of shiat and he was able to achieve enlightenment at a Stuckey's in Anahuac without any meditating.
2014-01-24 05:25:00 PM  
1 vote:
Airport bathroom?
2014-01-24 05:21:31 PM  
1 vote:
On a horse!
2014-01-24 05:20:29 PM  
1 vote:

Bareefer Obonghit: mrshowrules: He's gone to Benghazi and he's cracked the whole thing open.  Lara Logan is interviewing him right now.

Well, looks like she's in for another stripping & fingering.

There "tasteless" and then there is "kicking the rung of civilization down a notch tasteless." Congratulations. Even I'm offended by that and I'm an asshole.
2014-01-24 05:17:58 PM  
1 vote:
Playing basketball with Dennis Rodman in Best Korea?
2014-01-24 05:17:47 PM  
1 vote:
I said that to my boss once - I was calling from jail.

/they took my shoe laces
2014-01-24 05:15:35 PM  
1 vote:
From the clues in the text, he's on a 3 day bender.
2014-01-24 05:14:32 PM  
1 vote:
Staff trying to flush him out?

/whatever he says, i'm not buying it without independent confirmation
2014-01-24 05:14:12 PM  
1 vote:
"Where am I?"


// no, really - stay there
// or jump up your own ass and die, either way
2014-01-24 05:13:49 PM  
1 vote:
He has been helping a scientist jump from body to body through time.... hoping that the next leap will be the leap home.
2014-01-24 05:11:33 PM  
1 vote:
how long is an involuntary hold in texas?
2014-01-24 05:11:18 PM  
1 vote:
Prepare to meet "Stephanie" Stockman on Monday.
2014-01-24 05:09:13 PM  
1 vote:
Voila! Finally getting that messy campaign headquarters cleaned up. He didn't want anyone to think he was a messy housekeeper.
2014-01-24 05:09:12 PM  
1 vote:
Do we care?

Are we caring now?
2014-01-24 05:08:22 PM  
1 vote:

qorkfiend: No, seriously. WTF is he talking about?

He's been avoiding his job duties due to lots and lots of shiat going on about his campaign finances.  This is just another layer of distraction to avoid having to explain why money is turning up missing.
2014-01-24 05:04:51 PM  
1 vote:
I'm guessing Bangkok

and imagine a sobbing underage ladyboy is somehow involved.
2014-01-24 05:04:50 PM  
1 vote:
No, seriously. WTF is he talking about?
2014-01-24 05:02:31 PM  
1 vote:
Man, the circuit parties at Fire Island are getting out of hand.
2014-01-24 05:01:31 PM  
1 vote:
Came here to say bathroom stall, but I see everyone had a similar idea.
2014-01-24 05:00:52 PM  
1 vote:
Visiting urban areas and clubbing the poor like baby seals.
2014-01-24 05:00:13 PM  
1 vote:
I'm guessing killing rhino's or elephants.
2014-01-24 04:58:28 PM  
1 vote:
in the bathroom of a rest stop balls deep in "family values."
2014-01-24 04:54:31 PM  
1 vote:
Baker Acted and under observation?
2014-01-24 04:54:21 PM  
1 vote:
Oilcan Harry's Boatyard and Bathhouse?
2014-01-24 04:49:16 PM  
1 vote:

mrshowrules: He's gone to Benghazi and he's cracked the whole thing open.  Lara Logan is interviewing him right now.

Well, looks like she's in for another stripping & fingering.
2014-01-24 04:44:51 PM  
1 vote:
He's gone to Benghazi and he's cracked the whole thing open.  Lara Logan is interviewing him right now.
2014-01-24 04:34:38 PM  
1 vote:
He found Obama's Kenyan birth certificate!
2014-01-24 04:25:55 PM  
1 vote:
The derp dessert?
2014-01-24 04:25:07 PM  
1 vote:
2014-01-24 04:20:09 PM  
1 vote:
2014-01-24 04:09:36 PM  
1 vote:
Returning with the Riders of Rohan to aid Gondor against Obama?
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