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(Jezebel)   It's official: Hipsters proclaim beekeeping OVER, hunting and fishing IN   (jezebel.com) divider line 298
    More: Ironic, urban centres, hipsters, fish  
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5916 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jan 2014 at 2:26 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



298 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-01-24 04:12:49 PM  

give me doughnuts: I hope you and your companions all die of hypothermia, or lose limbs to frostbite


Why are you mad?
 
2014-01-24 04:14:16 PM  

autopsybeverage: tricycleracer: Your affordable hobby is not safe from hipster assimilation.  I suggest getting into off-shore racing or transatlantic ballooning.

And this is why I'd be frightened as a hunter -- how many of these newbies are going traipsing out into the woods with loaded weapons and not one lick of safety training?


This is why there should be a week of hunting for hipsters only.  It doesn't matter what the game is, say that they can hunt ibex, only for that week.  That will appeal to their sense of doing something outside of the mainstream, hunting animals you probably never heard of.  They aren't going to get anything, no matter what it is.  What will be a plus, is the carnage these idiots inflict on themselves, with loaded rifles. It will be glorious.  The bodies will be stacked like cordwood, near the hunting lodges.  The dead will only be identified by their ironic t-shirts, each of which, will be unique, like a fingerprint.
 
2014-01-24 04:14:47 PM  
I had a high regard for hipsters before it was cool, which is now.
 
2014-01-24 04:16:28 PM  

HeadLever: give me doughnuts: I hope you and your companions all die of hypothermia, or lose limbs to frostbite

Why are you mad?



People who trophy hunt, particularly for predators, are douche-bags.
They may as well just go down to the local pound and shoot all the big dogs.
 
2014-01-24 04:17:11 PM  

i.r.id10t: tricycleracer: So are muzzleloaders the fixies of hunting rifles?

Only a flintlock or matchlock.... none of that newfangled in-line 209 primer crap


My guess, a blunderbuss.
 
2014-01-24 04:18:07 PM  
This guy must be the ultimate hipster!
http://honest-food.net/

Frankly, you can call me whatever you want, I'll be over here enjoying my roast duck and partridge pot pie!
 
2014-01-24 04:19:22 PM  

Cheron: Just what I need pork pie hat, ironic tee shirt and PBR walking around the woods with a load rifle.


Time to invest in Kevlar...
 
2014-01-24 04:19:55 PM  

give me doughnuts: People who trophy hunt, particularly for predators, are douche-bags.


Can't manage the big game if you also don't manage the predators. You may not like it, but it is a fact of wildlife management.

And shooting a wolf is much different that shooting a dog.  Unless you dog is chasing and killing deer/moose/elk/cattle/sheep/pets.
 
2014-01-24 04:21:15 PM  

zimbomba63: autopsybeverage: tricycleracer: Your affordable hobby is not safe from hipster assimilation.  I suggest getting into off-shore racing or transatlantic ballooning.

And this is why I'd be frightened as a hunter -- how many of these newbies are going traipsing out into the woods with loaded weapons and not one lick of safety training?

This is why there should be a week of hunting for hipsters only.  It doesn't matter what the game is, say that they can hunt ibex, only for that week.  That will appeal to their sense of doing something outside of the mainstream, hunting animals you probably never heard of.  They aren't going to get anything, no matter what it is.  What will be a plus, is the carnage these idiots inflict on themselves, with loaded rifles. It will be glorious.  The bodies will be stacked like cordwood, near the hunting lodges.  The dead will only be identified by their ironic t-shirts, each of which, will be unique, like a fingerprint.


I'm not going to claim a bunch of johnny-come-lately noobs is going to be the safest sort of hunt... but honestly?  For every responsible hunter, there's always been like 20 guys, guns raised, who've each had ten beers chasing a deer directly toward eachother in the Wisconsin backwoods.  Somehow most of them live, too.  The serious hunters I know won't even hunt on non-private land because they can't be sure they won't be mowed down by the idiots otherwise.
 
2014-01-24 04:21:37 PM  

tricycleracer: So are muzzleloaders the fixies of hunting rifles?


Oh God, keep them out of black powder shooting, please...
 
2014-01-24 04:22:50 PM  

Rapmaster2000: Michic: I thought these people were vegan? Are they over that, too?

These people eat animals you've never even heard of.


It's local, free range.
 
2014-01-24 04:22:50 PM  

give me doughnuts: SumoJeb: Going wolf and coyote hunting today! Fishing for ling tomorrow. No hipsters this far north... the oil and gas scares them.


I hope you and your companions all die of hypothermia, or lose limbs to frostbite.


Bounty is $650 per wolf. Suck it haters.
 
2014-01-24 04:23:33 PM  
Nope;  closest thing a hipster might get to hunting would be attempting to become Chuck Testa's apprentice.   Even then, things would come out looking more like unused props from Dinner for Schmucks.
 
2014-01-24 04:24:01 PM  

2KanZam: Ow! That was my feelings!: autopsybeverage: tricycleracer: Your affordable hobby is not safe from hipster assimilation.  I suggest getting into off-shore racing or transatlantic ballooning.

And this is why I'd be frightened as a hunter -- how many of these newbies are going traipsing out into the woods with loaded weapons and not one lick of safety training?

Most states require a hunter's safety course before issuing a hunting permit.


Most states take your word for it....


in both alaska and washington i was able to provide proof of military service and skip the entire thing.

then again i think at least four of the five armed services do basic firearms/marksmanship training in boot(dunno about airforce. i've heard they don't.)
 
2014-01-24 04:25:28 PM  

letrole: I had a high regard for hipsters before it was cool, which is now.


I had a surname back in the 70s.
 
2014-01-24 04:25:33 PM  

Random Internet Persona: DarkSoulNoHope: Seems more to me that some of the Hipsters miss their childhood (many of the ones that come to Brooklyn are from central states like Iowa, Nebraska, Kentucky, etc) and want to go hunting again, call it an "alternative" activity, and the non-Vegan ones (or a Vegan one who says she's only shooting the animal "ironically!" :-P ) will follow on until the activity becomes "mainstream" again (as if hunting isn't a common activity already) and they'll move onto something else again.

Epic facepalm.

 
Come on, I bet I made you smirk a little at that one! :) :-D
 
2014-01-24 04:27:38 PM  

Skarekrough: Please...God....don't let them embrace fly fishing....


Might be too late. Their girlfriends operatives have already jacked up the prices of feathers at fly-tie shops for a few years with all the goddamn feathers and roach clips as haute coiture hair accessories. I can't imagine what chaos will occur when they try learning how to reload shotgun shells via youtube.

/hide the children
 
2014-01-24 04:28:24 PM  

tricycleracer: So are muzzleloaders the fixies of hunting rifles?


Nah.... fixies are too modern for that.  Muzzleloaders would be, uh... what do you call those crazy-looking vintage bikes with one huge wheel and one tiny wheel?
 
2014-01-24 04:28:50 PM  

SumoJeb: Bounty is $650 per wolf. Suck it haters.


Do you get to keep the hide as well or do you have to turn the animal in to get the bounty?
 
2014-01-24 04:30:33 PM  

give me doughnuts: SumoJeb: Going wolf and coyote hunting today! Fishing for ling tomorrow. No hipsters this far north... the oil and gas scares them.


I hope you and your companions all die of hypothermia, or lose limbs to frostbite.


The ultimate hipster trick: getting frostbite before it gets cool.
 
2014-01-24 04:30:44 PM  

SumoJeb: give me doughnuts: SumoJeb: Going wolf and coyote hunting today! Fishing for ling tomorrow. No hipsters this far north... the oil and gas scares them.


I hope you and your companions all die of hypothermia, or lose limbs to frostbite.

Bounty is $650 per wolf. Suck it haters.


Wow, really? Around here you get fined for shooting 'em from the re-established herd.

Which is why most farmers will tell you they shot a coyote last weekend.
 
2014-01-24 04:30:45 PM  

raygundan: tricycleracer: So are muzzleloaders the fixies of hunting rifles?

Nah.... fixies are too modern for that.  Muzzleloaders would be, uh... what do you call those crazy-looking vintage bikes with one huge wheel and one tiny wheel?


Penny-farthing?  Man, that's like a blunderbuss.
 
2014-01-24 04:32:00 PM  

raygundan: tricycleracer: So are muzzleloaders the fixies of hunting rifles?

Nah.... fixies are too modern for that.  Muzzleloaders would be, uh... what do you call those crazy-looking vintage bikes with one huge wheel and one tiny wheel?


I don't know the name, but it's what Homer got kicked for!

thepennyfarthing.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-01-24 04:32:39 PM  

HeadLever: SumoJeb: Bounty is $650 per wolf. Suck it haters.

Do you get to keep the hide as well or do you have to turn the animal in to get the bounty?

we get to keep them. i give them to my trapper buddy. he has been getting great money for the coyote and wolf furs this year

 
2014-01-24 04:33:13 PM  

autopsybeverage: And this is why I'd be frightened as a hunter -- how many of these newbies are going traipsing out into the woods with loaded weapons and not one lick of safety training?


Just to frame this comment, I'm a lifetime member of the NRA.

I would not be opposed to a mandatory gun safety class before one can obtain a hunting licence.
 
2014-01-24 04:34:48 PM  

SumoJeb: we get to keep them. i give them to my trapper buddy. he has been getting great money for the coyote and wolf furs this year


Yeah, fur prices are pretty high down here as well.  Muskrats are 10 to 12 bucks last I checked.
 
2014-01-24 04:35:35 PM  

tricycleracer: raygundan: tricycleracer: So are muzzleloaders the fixies of hunting rifles?

Nah.... fixies are too modern for that.  Muzzleloaders would be, uh... what do you call those crazy-looking vintage bikes with one huge wheel and one tiny wheel?

Penny-farthing?  Man, that's like a blunderbuss.


Hm.  We're gonna need two scales to compare.  Fixies are just like modern high-tech bikes, except stripped of all the mechanical bits, including some that are useful.  I'm on the fence as to whether a single-shot bolt action rifle is closer to a fixie, or a singlespeed, though.  The more I think about it, you might have been right originally.

Having this discussion is pretty hipster.  Of course, so is intentionally not having it.
 
2014-01-24 04:35:44 PM  

TehMvnk: Nope;  closest thing a hipster might get to hunting would be attempting to become Chuck Testa's apprentice.   Even then, things would come out looking more like unused props from Dinner for Schmucks.


Just shows what kind of commercial you can put together with a $20.  Where did he get the hat?  From the Wehrmacht.
 
2014-01-24 04:37:38 PM  
so is everything someone doesnt like hipster now? is the word hipster the new "gay"?
 
2014-01-24 04:39:15 PM  

Skarekrough: Please...God....don't let them embrace fly fishing....


Pro-tip: you might be a hipster already.
 
2014-01-24 04:40:41 PM  

tricycleracer: raygundan: tricycleracer: So are muzzleloaders the fixies of hunting rifles?

Nah.... fixies are too modern for that.  Muzzleloaders would be, uh... what do you call those crazy-looking vintage bikes with one huge wheel and one tiny wheel?

Penny-farthing?  Man, that's like a blunderbuss.


Actually... here's what we need for a gun to be like a fixie.  Take a totally normal modern firearm, and then *convert* it to muzzle-loading and grind off the ironsights.  THAT would comfortably express the weirdness and awkwardness that is the overreaching attempt to simplify embodied in a fixie bike.  A Marlin Model 60 with the receiver welded in place.
 
2014-01-24 04:45:04 PM  
I've been thinking about it, and rifles of any vintage and type, may be too mainstream.  I bet they go for trebuchets.  They will just lob a barrage of large rocks into the woods, and then go in and see what was ironically killed.
 
2014-01-24 04:45:14 PM  

raygundan: It is currently impossible to not be a hipster.


Not really.  They're easy to spot pretentious douchebags who, when you see them, you immediately want to punch in the face.  Then again, I'm 50 so I see things differnt.
 
2014-01-24 04:45:54 PM  

give me doughnuts: SumoJeb: Going wolf and coyote hunting today! Fishing for ling tomorrow. No hipsters this far north... the oil and gas scares them.


I hope you and your companions all die of hypothermia, or lose limbs to frostbite.


I hope you get aids.
 
2014-01-24 04:49:07 PM  

doubled99: "We never buy a package of ground beef. Ever," said Larsen.


Now that's hipster shiat right there


She hunts cows?
 
2014-01-24 04:50:37 PM  

Ebbelwoi: raygundan: It is currently impossible to not be a hipster.

Not really.  They're easy to spot pretentious douchebags who, when you see them, you immediately want to punch in the face.  Then again, I'm 50 so I see things differnt.


Bah!  When you get older, you won't be so discriminating.  I'm 63, and I want to punch just about everybody in the face.
 
2014-01-24 04:52:10 PM  
Huh, I read that as proclaim bookkeeping over hunting and fishing, was wondering what all the hubbub was about.
 
2014-01-24 04:54:54 PM  

Ow! That was my feelings!: autopsybeverage: tricycleracer: Your affordable hobby is not safe from hipster assimilation.  I suggest getting into off-shore racing or transatlantic ballooning.

And this is why I'd be frightened as a hunter -- how many of these newbies are going traipsing out into the woods with loaded weapons and not one lick of safety training?

Most states require a hunter's safety course before issuing a hunting permit.


In FL this is true for people who were born in 1975 and after. Born before that? Have at it.

/grandfathered in by one year
 
2014-01-24 04:55:48 PM  

Ebbelwoi: raygundan: It is currently impossible to not be a hipster.

Not really.  They're easy to spot pretentious douchebags who, when you see them, you immediately want to punch in the face.  Then again, I'm 50 so I see things differnt.


I'm 32, I agree with you. Of course I'm a 32 year old Goth DJ who has suffered from the stench of non-showering Hipsters who invade Goth clubs (because it's "alternative" to them, not for any good reason like 'Enjoying the music, club, and/or people'), and standing on the dance floor in a big evil grouping (not to the side of the dance floor, or sitting/standing at the bar) in the way of actual dancers, while critiquing the club and the patrons to their smelly Hipster friends. So we may see things differently, but it doesn't mean we don't have good reasons (or could even have similar ones) to hate these pretentious douchebags! :)
 
2014-01-24 04:56:18 PM  

Jimmysolson: Huh, I read that as proclaim bookkeeping over hunting and fishing, was wondering what all the hubbub was about.


You probably never heard of it, Ironic bookkeeping.  The IRS is going to go wild over it.
 
2014-01-24 04:56:51 PM  

fanbladesaresharp: Skarekrough: Please...God....don't let them embrace fly fishing....

Might be too late. Their girlfriends operatives have already jacked up the prices of feathers at fly-tie shops for a few years with all the goddamn feathers and roach clips as haute coiture hair accessories. I can't imagine what chaos will occur when they try learning how to reload shotgun shells via youtube.

/hide the children


Actually, the price of feather is dropping.

Whiting is shipping most of their product to hairdressers.  For $20 I picked up a bag of Cape feather that will make a ton of flatings.

No, the market isn't bottoming out like I hoped, but for the first time there are quality products out there for reasonable prices.

I was lucky though, two years ago I ran into a guy who was down-sizing and took some pity on me.  He set me up with some grizzly capes that were just beautiful.
 
2014-01-24 05:00:36 PM  

KawaiiNot: Well once they grew the beards, I knew hunting and fishing weren't long behind. Next they build a cabin and make friends with bear cub. It's inevitable. What has happened before will happen again:


i.imgur.com

Whos Steve?
 
2014-01-24 05:22:54 PM  

give me doughnuts: SumoJeb: Going wolf and coyote hunting today! Fishing for ling tomorrow. No hipsters this far north... the oil and gas scares them.


I hope you and your companions all die of hypothermia, or lose limbs to frostbite.


Frankfort's wolves were eradicated in the 19th century. Now they only exist in Tshirt form.
 
2014-01-24 05:31:43 PM  

Ebbelwoi: raygundan: It is currently impossible to not be a hipster.

Not really.  They're easy to spot pretentious douchebags who, when you see them, you immediately want to punch in the face.  Then again, I'm 50 so I see things differnt.


Honestly, curmudgeonly people over 50 are far worse. At least hipsters don't have ridiculously paranoid Fox News nuttery going on in their heads about Obama and government.
 
m00
2014-01-24 05:37:11 PM  
Meh, not really. Hipsters aren't interested in anything that resembles work. You can't suddenly be an "authentic" hunter/woodsman overnight. Cell phones don't work that far out in the woods, it's easy to get lost/hurt.
 
2014-01-24 05:39:19 PM  
They need to take up fishing as well.
 
2014-01-24 05:41:06 PM  
Just what I need pork pie hat, ironic tee shirt and PBR walking around the woods with a load rifle.

I can see how someone might be able to mistake them for a deer...just sayin'.
 
2014-01-24 05:42:36 PM  
What the fark is a hipster anyway?
 
2014-01-24 05:43:53 PM  
I wanna see hipsters skin, gut and clean game. That's when I'll know this isn't just a romanticized version of the cute chic in Hunger Games with a supernatural skill at bow and arrow ..

www.outdoorpros.com
Skinning knife and hatchet. Go ahead, think through that these are for ..

After that bloody work, you must cool the caracas as quickly as possibe

www.wildlife.state.nh.us

That's as easy a pictorial I could find that wasn't so gorey it would get me banned for 24 hours

This is the easy part, the thing that gets romanticized ..

www.hunting-newfoundland.com

These are the hard facts about the reality of hunting ..

Not Safe For Work

So, good luck, sisters. If you can do it, and do it right, hats off and Huzzah. But don't let Hunger Games make you think it's all stalking and magically a fine steak dinner afterwards. There are a lot of bloody steps in between ..

Selah
 
m00
2014-01-24 05:48:10 PM  

raygundan: I'm on the fence as to whether a single-shot bolt action rifle is closer to a fixie, or a singlespeed, though.


I hunt with a Remington Model 33, but you've probably never heard of it.
 
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