If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(News.com.au)   Utah Mormons warn of 'alcohol culture'. With helpful outline of why there are no farkers in Utah   (news.com.au) divider line 116
    More: Asinine, Mormons, Utah State University, Alcohol law, Mormon Church, social stigma, social costs  
•       •       •

4597 clicks; posted to Main » on 24 Jan 2014 at 7:05 AM (31 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



116 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all
 
2014-01-24 07:15:03 AM
Technically, there are a lot of farkers in Utah, but they are the baby-making kind.
 
2014-01-24 07:18:49 AM
i26.photobucket.com

"This actually needs some explanation. Beer in Supermarkets in Utah is weak, 3 points instead of the normal 6 points of alchohol. It's the religious influence, and a pain in the ass. Now to me it makes no sense. If you've got alchohol, you've got alchohol. So why 3 instead of 6? You know a drunk's just going to drink twice as many beers to get drunk, so you not only have a drunk on your hands, you have a drunk who's fat and gross. There's nothing worse."

 
2014-01-24 07:19:15 AM
arches.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-01-24 07:23:17 AM
... and chip away at the outside perception the Utah's rules are abnormal.

It's not a perception, it's a reality.
 
2014-01-24 07:23:21 AM
It's their state, they can do what they want with it. You don't have to live there.

/no, I do not extend that theory to every issue
 
2014-01-24 07:28:59 AM
Way to separate Church and State, Utah.
 
2014-01-24 07:30:10 AM
Utah had the lowest number of alcohol-related traffic deaths per capita in 2012, the church points out, citing federal highway statistics.

Their number of alcohol related traffic deaths per capita was .292 per 10,000 people. New York was second with .305 per 10,000 people, and New York had almost 9x the population as Utah.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2014-01-24 07:30:31 AM
Too bad someone didn't warn Utah about Mormon culture before it was too late.
 
2014-01-24 07:37:47 AM
There's an old saying: if you bring one Mormon fishing with you, he's going to drink all your beer. If you bring two Mormons fishing, you get to have all the beer to yourself.

ongbok: per 10,000 people, and New York had almost 9x the population as Utah.


Actual population size isn't important when you're measuring something on a per-capita basis. Now, some measure of density (cars per mile of road) may be useful- New York is much denser.
 
vpb [TotalFark]
2014-01-24 07:39:08 AM
ongbok:

Their number of alcohol related traffic deaths per capita was .292 per 10,000 people. New York was second with .305 per 10,000 people, and New York had almost 9x the population as Utah.

Which means what, considering that the statistics are per 10,000 people?
 
2014-01-24 07:40:55 AM

vpb: ongbok:

Their number of alcohol related traffic deaths per capita was .292 per 10,000 people. New York was second with .305 per 10,000 people, and New York had almost 9x the population as Utah.

Which means what, considering that the statistics are per 10,000 people?


New York doesn't have crazy strict alcohol laws and their deaths per capita is almost as low as Utah's.
 
2014-01-24 07:42:38 AM
Any religion that says rum and coffee is a sin is a dangerous cult that should be avoided at all costs.
 
2014-01-24 07:43:04 AM
It has been awhile, but I went to SLC a few times on business trips before the Winter Olympics. I found two decent brewpubs and one even sold and filled growlers.
 
2014-01-24 07:45:12 AM

Weaver95: Any religion that says rum and coffee is a sin is a dangerous cult that should be avoided at all costs.


Isn't it a little early to be drinking?
 
2014-01-24 07:45:53 AM

no 5th av. in Billings: Weaver95: Any religion that says rum and coffee is a sin is a dangerous cult that should be avoided at all costs.

Isn't it a little early to be drinking?


it's 6pm somewhere in the world.
 
2014-01-24 07:46:09 AM
Wisconsin slams another shot and laughs.
 
2014-01-24 07:46:59 AM

Weaver95: Any religion that says rum and coffee is a sin is a dangerous cult that should be avoided at all costs.


You can extend that to include any religion that bans bacon or cheeseburgers. Dangerous and creepy.
 
2014-01-24 07:47:24 AM
I would like to warn against "stupidity culture" where dumbasses think they are better than you and end up acting like morons.
 
2014-01-24 07:47:27 AM
That any legitimacy or consideration is given to the Mormon religion, one invented by a convicted criminal in the clear view of recent recorded history, is a great failing of humankind.
 
2014-01-24 07:47:45 AM

no 5th av. in Billings: Weaver95: Any religion that says rum and coffee is a sin is a dangerous cult that should be avoided at all costs.

Isn't it a little early to be drinking?


You know I've seen each of those words individually, but I don't think I've ever seen them arranged in a sentence like that.
 
2014-01-24 07:48:55 AM

no 5th av. in Billings: Weaver95: Any religion that says rum and coffee is a sin is a dangerous cult that should be avoided at all costs.

Isn't it a little early to be drinking?


never
 
2014-01-24 07:49:03 AM

Mad Scientist: That any legitimacy or consideration is given to the Mormon religionScientology, one invented by a convicted criminal in the clear view of recent recorded history, is a great failing of humankind.


And in another 50 years, we'll have a newly invented brand of idiocy.
 
2014-01-24 07:50:14 AM
Ahead of the upcoming legislative session, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints posted to its website a hefty multimedia policy statement urging lawmakers to uphold rules that church leaders say are "closely tied to the moral culture of the state".

Shut up, you cockscultists.
 
2014-01-24 07:51:22 AM

Professor Farksworth: no 5th av. in Billings: Weaver95: Any religion that says rum and coffee is a sin is a dangerous cult that should be avoided at all costs.

Isn't it a little early to be drinking?

You know I've seen each of those words individually, but I don't think I've ever seen them arranged in a sentence like that.


Fark needs a "chortle" button
 
2014-01-24 07:51:58 AM
We've got a reasonable system and it seems to be working

No you don't and no it isn't.
 
2014-01-24 07:52:29 AM
Welcome to Utah.
Oh, and abandon hope, all ye boozers who enter.
 
2014-01-24 07:53:45 AM
img.photobucket.com
 
2014-01-24 07:54:48 AM

t3knomanser: Weaver95: Any religion that says rum and coffee is a sin is a dangerous cult that should be avoided at all costs.

You can extend that to include any religion that bans bacon or cheeseburgers. Dangerous and creepy.


ok, I can follow you on this one.  so valid religions must like coffee, rum, bacon AND cheeseburgers.  any spiritual belief system that denies the deliciousness of the previously listed foods is to be considered a dangerous cult and avoided like the plague.  and also - rum is holy water.  use it wisely!
 
2014-01-24 07:57:57 AM
clarkblog.typepad.com

Here's to staying the fark out of Utah
 
2014-01-24 07:58:51 AM
Culture warns other of Utah-based cult.
 
2014-01-24 08:02:42 AM
It stuck out to me right away that booze (beer) advertising in Utah gas stations was noticeably more "over the top" than other places I've been. Really bolstered the disappointment  in seeing it was 3.2 beer. Maybe this needs more warning.
/dnrtfa
 
2014-01-24 08:06:01 AM

no 5th av. in Billings: It stuck out to me right away that booze (beer) advertising in Utah gas stations was noticeably more "over the top" than other places I've been. Really bolstered the disappointment  in seeing it was 3.2 beer. Maybe this needs more warning.
/dnrtfa


A state swathed in a "faith" that was come up by a con man who swore by plates written in a special language that only he could see is banking on its residents' not reading? Why am I not shocked?
 
2014-01-24 08:12:17 AM
1. Everyone has the right to voice an opinion. Even those who belong to a church.
2. Everyone has the right to vote, even those who are religious.
3. The Mormon church does not threaten politicians to vote a certain way. Harry Reid is a Mormon, you would think that he would have been drummed out of the LDS church by your strict-cult based insinuations.
4. Kuddos to Utah for voting for things that are clean and good for the overall public.
 
2014-01-24 08:12:19 AM
nowscape.com

dumb dumb dumb dumb dumb
 
2014-01-24 08:13:28 AM

EyeballKid: ..."faith" that was come up by a con man...


As opposed to faith that was created by an honest individual who provided considerable data that was able to sway adherents by reason?
 
2014-01-24 08:14:56 AM

Weaver95: and also - rum is holy water.  use it wisely!


Oh, brother, I have sinned! The first time I ever got drunk, it was on rum. That wasn't the sin. This was also the first time I had been drinking, so with know knowledge of the subject, I established a baseline that roughly 5oz of rum was a basic serving size. Over time, I developed my tolerance up to coffee mugs full of rum. One night, I was at a party, and saw, "Hey, rum! And coffee mugs! I know what to do here!" So I grabbed the bottle of rum, loaded it into a coffee mug, and didn't think twice about why this bottle of rum had a weird little metal grille on top, or what the meaning of the number "151" on the side was.

The next morning I had to get up at around sunrise and drive  east for two hours. It was one of the  worst days in my life up to that point.

In any case, back to ragging on Mormons, we should all have a shot of rum in honor of Lucy Harris, who knew what was up with Mormonism.
 
2014-01-24 08:17:28 AM
Close call.

Mormons are only slightly less annoying than drunks.
 
2014-01-24 08:18:58 AM

veedeevadeevoodee:


Tried that on a layover, it's a shiatty beer with a good name.
 
2014-01-24 08:20:09 AM

skozlaw: EyeballKid: ..."faith" that was come up by a con man...

As opposed to faith that was created by an honest individual who provided considerable data that was able to sway adherents by reason?



True that, but nonetheless there is a notable difference. I can say that any other faith is just as half-assed and convoluted in its mythmaking as the LDS, but that's the only one, other than Scientology, where there are actual records of the founder -- an actual criminal record! -- upon which you can make assessments and such. It's not like we have a record of some fat kid named Siddartha claiming his attempts to reach oneness kept him from going to work or paying child support or the like. The older faiths have, at least, some sort of vagueness and lack of a central figure who actually propagated said faith. This is not the case with Scientology or Mormonism. And I can't help but find that kind of faith especially stupid.
 
2014-01-24 08:21:33 AM

rev. dave: I would like to warn against "stupidity culture" where dumbasses think they are better than you and end up acting like morons.


Like you just did?
 
2014-01-24 08:27:55 AM
Dear Religious Asshats,

It's nice that your crazy cult wants you to abstain from alcohol. I'm glad you are abstaining.
I, however, am not a follower of your faith. I will never be a follower of your faith. There are lots of people who aren't followers of your faith. We do not wish to abstain.
Stop trying to make us.

xoxoxo

The Rest of Us
 
2014-01-24 08:28:24 AM
Just because you don't drink does mean you can't have fun.  You can always spy on your roommate and narc him out if he slips
 
2014-01-24 08:28:45 AM
And THIS is why you can't have an NFL or MLB team.
 
2014-01-24 08:30:45 AM
ogdensown.com
 
2014-01-24 08:33:34 AM
Can I have a couple of beers on the weekend and still look down on my coworkers who mostly talk about how drunk they wish they were right now?
 
2014-01-24 08:33:56 AM
The problem with people who deliberately avoid drinking for moral or religious reasons is that they ascribe nearly magical and illogical properties to alcohol - I saw this happen in Utah quite a bit when I lived there.  If you've had a single beer, you're unfit to drive six hours later, for example.  If you taste alcohol, you'll become addicted to it.  That sort of thing.  It makes their moral argument hard to listen to, kind of like their moral argument on sexual abstinence; they might both originate from a legitimate concern for their fellows' spiritual health, but somewhere along the way they've created a bizarre and logic-free anti-fetish that does a lot more harm than good.
 
2014-01-24 08:34:10 AM

no 5th av. in Billings: Weaver95: Any religion that says rum and coffee is a sin is a dangerous cult that should be avoided at all costs.

Isn't it a little early to be drinking?


Not if you consider it an extension of last night's drinking.
 
2014-01-24 08:34:33 AM
I don't trust any Christians that don't drink for "religious" reasons. It's fine if you don't want to drink because you never personally liked alcohol. If you quit because you were an alcoholic and you do terrible things while drunk, by all means, don't drink. But when the mythical founder of your religion has two defining events that revolve around making sure everyone had some wine, you can't farking tell me that you don't drink because your faith is against alcohol.
 
2014-01-24 08:37:15 AM

kroonermanblack: Like you just did?


Hmmm.... the Mormons are certainly judging themselves morally superior to individuals who imbibe alcohol, are they not? Is that not the entire basis of this discussion? That certainly seems to satisfy his implication that the Mormons believes themselves to be better than everyone else. And they're using the power of the state to enforce their personal values on the entire populace even though it's a strictly moral judgment.

What's your problem with his comment, then? Seems perfectly accurate, if a bit inelegant.
 
2014-01-24 08:40:41 AM

kbronsito: I don't trust any Christians that don't drink for "religious" reasons. It's fine if you don't want to drink because you never personally liked alcohol. If you quit because you were an alcoholic and you do terrible things while drunk, by all means, don't drink. But when the mythical founder of your religion has two defining events that revolve around making sure everyone had some wine, you can't farking tell me that you don't drink because your faith is against alcohol.


There's something in there about "seed bearing plants" and their uses that tends to get glossed over somehow too.
 
Displayed 50 of 116 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report