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(Uproxx)   These Star Wars toys look more like Star Wars than the prequels do   (uproxx.com) divider line 66
    More: Cool, Star Wars, Finnish, toys  
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6622 clicks; posted to Geek » on 22 Jan 2014 at 3:11 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-01-22 08:25:14 PM  
FAKE!

And damned impressive too.
 
2014-01-22 09:47:58 PM  
Oh, look - we all hate the prequels. So let's pile on.

These things look better than the originals, which were pretty dumb movies, to be sure.

Oh, stop. I'm at least as old as you are. I like Star Wars. But, man, it's dumb when you stop to think about it. Like Bat Man.
 
2014-01-22 11:57:12 PM  

Big Beef Burrito: I'm more upset about the entire Smaug encounter being butchered.



This. All that added cartoony bullshiat about chasing dwarves through the mountain, and then the Gold Dwarf. . . WTF were they thinking?

All of that and we lose the best line of the entire book:

"Never laugh at a live dragon."

goddammitsomuch
 
2014-01-23 12:01:34 AM  

Sybarite: I dropped a Mon Calamari Star Cruiser shaped turd the other day that looked more like Star Wars than the prequels do.


Dropping Tie fighters without wings right now so getting a kick...
 
2014-01-23 01:21:35 AM  

Por que tan serioso: Sybarite: I dropped a Mon Calamari Star Cruiser shaped turd the other day that looked more like Star Wars than the prequels do.

Dropping Tie fighters without wings right now so getting a kick...


Sounds like you need more fiber
 
2014-01-23 06:34:06 AM  
Pretty good on the other hand WTF did they do to Flickr?
 
2014-01-23 07:38:33 AM  

OnlyM3: HMS_Blinkin
2014-01-22 04:26:49 PM


farkeruk: Attack of the Clones looks like ass.

It's amazing to compare the SW prequels with the LOTR trilogy, which were both made at similar times. The LOTR series used miniatures much more extensively than CGI, and still looks quite good and modern today despite being ten years old. The SW prequels, which were almost nothing BUT CGI look, as you say, like ass today.
Then there's The Hobbit prequels that are all CGI and so far as bad as the StarWars prequels


And at least Lucas stayed true to the story(because they're his stories).  PJ thinks he knows more than Tolkien, so let's go ahead and have Saruman die at Orthanc instead of the Shire or Thorin, not Dain, attack the great orc so we can have some contrived chase through Middle Earth.  Fark fark fark PJ.
 
2014-01-23 09:01:55 AM  

RyansPrivates: Skunkwolf: RyansPrivates: meanmutton: give me doughnuts: B-wings. Ick.

Shoulda called those things "Space Cows."
Totally useless versus TIE fighters.

They're not interceptors.  They're bombers.  They're designed to attack capital ships, with A-wings and X-wings protecting them from enemy fighters.

*Shakes tiny fist.*

Then why do A-Wings carry more torpedoes?

Huh?

Not to get too geeky, but the A-wing carries concussion missiles (6) and a b-wing carries torpedoes (2 bays of 8 = 16)

Source:
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/B-wing_starfighter

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/RZ-1_A-wing_interceptor


Beat me to it.

I'm actually not a big fan of the movies, but the X-Wing and Tie Fighter games kept me sane through elementary school.

/doing the Death Star run with a B-wing was much easier than an X-wing
//liked Tie Fighter better than the X-wing games though, made for better dogfights usually
///almost lost my shiat at the Y-wings mistaken for B-wings thing.
//and that felt really stupid to type
/I think it's time for bed
 
2014-01-23 09:07:26 AM  

LL316: PJ thinks he knows more than Tolkien, so let's go ahead and have Saruman die at Orthanc instead of the Shire or Thorin, not Dain, attack the great orc so we can have some contrived chase through Middle Earth. Fark fark fark PJ.


tolkien needed an editor and PJ's films are fantastic.

go suck a bombadill.
 
2014-01-23 09:08:06 AM  

HMS_Blinkin: The SW prequels, which were almost nothing BUT CGI look, as you say, like ass today.


You'd probably be surprised at how many FX in the prequels are conventional.
 
2014-01-23 09:09:22 AM  

frepnog: tolkien needed an editor and PJ's films are fantastic.


No, Jackson needs an editor. For all his films.

/just farking die, Kong
 
2014-01-23 09:23:36 AM  

Boojum2k: Big Beef Burrito: I'm more upset about the entire Smaug encounter being butchered.


This. All that added cartoony bullshiat about chasing dwarves through the mountain, and then the Gold Dwarf. . . WTF were they thinking?

All of that and we lose the best line of the entire book:

"Never laugh at a live dragon."

goddammitsomuch


How many goofy action scenes does a movie really need?

That scene should have been all about atmosphere. Smaug's voice was great, and the fire breath effect really made it seem like a devastating weapon, but that's about it. The whole lair was too well-lit and the amount of gold was absurd.
 
2014-01-23 09:58:09 AM  

RyansPrivates: Skunkwolf: RyansPrivates: meanmutton: give me doughnuts: B-wings. Ick.

Shoulda called those things "Space Cows."
Totally useless versus TIE fighters.

They're not interceptors.  They're bombers.  They're designed to attack capital ships, with A-wings and X-wings protecting them from enemy fighters.

*Shakes tiny fist.*

Then why do A-Wings carry more torpedoes?

Huh?

Not to get too geeky, but the A-wing carries concussion missiles (6) and a b-wing carries torpedoes (2 bays of 8 = 16)

Source:
http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/B-wing_starfighter

http://starwars.wikia.com/wiki/RZ-1_A-wing_interceptor


THE NERD IS STRONG IN THIS ONE
 
2014-01-23 11:26:27 AM  

Boojum2k: Big Beef Burrito: I'm more upset about the entire Smaug encounter being butchered.


This. All that added cartoony bullshiat about chasing dwarves through the mountain, and then the Gold Dwarf. . . WTF were they thinking?

All of that and we lose the best line of the entire book:

"Never laugh at a live dragon."

goddammitsomuch


It's been a long time since I read The Hobbit, but having seen these two movies I'm left wondering what they're going to have left in the books to turn into a 30 minute scene that looks like a level of a videogame that features the protagonists running away from something?
 
2014-01-23 11:42:57 AM  

Ghastly: but having seen these two movies I'm left wondering what they're going to have left in the books to turn into a 30 minute scene that looks like a level of a videogame that features the protagonists running away from something?



They'll include a hilarious scene of Bilbo riding with Radagast on his bunny sleigh through the Battle of Five Armies, it'll cost $100 million for the bad CGI, have the Giant Eagles poop on Radagast, ball-chin goblins swinging at Bilbo and comically missing every time, and Gandalf standing over watching and looking stern. It will make the SW prequels look like The Godfather.
 
2014-01-23 11:43:11 AM  

Ghastly: Boojum2k: Big Beef Burrito: I'm more upset about the entire Smaug encounter being butchered.


This. All that added cartoony bullshiat about chasing dwarves through the mountain, and then the Gold Dwarf. . . WTF were they thinking?

All of that and we lose the best line of the entire book:

"Never laugh at a live dragon."

goddammitsomuch

It's been a long time since I read The Hobbit, but having seen these two movies I'm left wondering what they're going to have left in the books to turn into a 30 minute scene that looks like a level of a videogame that features the protagonists running away from something?


I'm just guessing, but I'll throw out some ideas. SPOILERS, I guess.

Bard doesn't simply shoot Smaug with his last arrow, he parkours all around Lake Town, dodging fireballs, and balancing precariously on rooftops and railings, all the while fighting off an invading force of orcs. The elf chick and the leftover dwarves hit foes with pans and household items. Wacky hijinks ensue.

Bilbo doesn't quietly sneak away with the Arkenstone without anyone noticing, he pickpockets Thorin, then has to run a gauntlet of surprised and angry dwarves before diving out of the front gate ledge. Wacky hijinks ensue.

Birdshiat Wizard resuces Gandalf from Sauron's fortress in a hilariously mad caper involving turtles or something. Wacky hijinks ensue.
 
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