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(Entertainment Weekly)   JJ Abrams claims his Star Wars movie actually has a finalized script   (insidemovies.ew.com) divider line 157
    More: Unlikely, J.J. Abrams, Star Wars, Episode VII, Rod Serling, Jesse Plemons, Television Critics Association, Breaking Bad  
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2538 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 21 Jan 2014 at 12:28 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2014-01-20 08:12:30 PM  
"I promise you it will be movie length."

Will it be in color?? Will it have sound?!? I NEED TO KNOW THESE THINGS!
 
2014-01-20 08:25:46 PM  
Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.
 
2014-01-20 08:28:40 PM  
Star Wars: Return of the Lens Flare
 
2014-01-20 08:32:03 PM  
Sounds like he needs IMAX camera lessons.
 
2014-01-20 08:41:38 PM  
Please let the opening scroll begin Episode VII: JAR-JAR IS DEAD.
 
2014-01-20 08:46:48 PM  
Three words... Darth Jar Jar
 
2014-01-20 08:47:58 PM  

Wadded Beef: Please let the opening scroll begin Episode VII: JAR-JAR IS DEAD.


Yeah, and how about that Barney the Dinosaur!
 
2014-01-20 10:59:39 PM  

Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.


Wait until you see the ending Damon Lindelof wrote.
 
2014-01-20 10:59:42 PM  
i42.tinypic.com
 
2014-01-21 12:19:42 AM  
There's a rumor that Dame Judi Dench might be Mon 'Many Bothans died to bring your this information' Mothma
 
2014-01-21 12:30:31 AM  
A bunch of Jews shiat into a copier, set the page count to 120, and hit print.
 
2014-01-21 12:32:47 AM  
Greedo's son will shoot first
 
2014-01-21 12:33:42 AM  

fusillade762: "I promise you it will be movie length."

Will it be in color?? Will it have sound?!? I NEED TO KNOW THESE THINGS!


He's cheating a bit though by having an extended "Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo" near the end to get to official movie length.
 
2014-01-21 12:51:49 AM  
Yeah, sure.  We've all heard this one before.
 
2014-01-21 12:53:11 AM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: A bunch of Jews shiat into a copier, set the page count to 120, and hit print.


As long as we're making asses of ourselves stereotyping Hollywood writers being Jewish...

dvdmedia.ign.com

Peter Dragon: ''We spent a quarter of a million dollars and we got the wrong Jew!?''
 
2014-01-21 12:58:42 AM  
Remember when Star Wars was actually good?

img.fark.net

Please just let Star Wars die.  With very, very few exceptions (Knights of the Old Republic) everything they've made since 1996 has been total garbage.  The more they make, the more they destroy.
I lost whatever small amount of hope I had in this project when JJ Abrams was attached to it.  I've disliked everything I've ever seen from him, particularly the absolutely revolting Star Trek remakes of his.   What pisses me off most about this film is that this one is going to shiat on BOTH of thetwo aspects of Star Wars that I still hold near and dear to me:

1) The original, unaltered movies
2) The original expanded universe of the late 80's and early 90's

No matter what they do they're going to kill the expanded universe.  I've actually been re-reading a lot of the original EU material for the first time since I was a kid, such as the West End Games roleplaying game books, the Thrawn trilogy, the Dark Empire comics, the Rogue Squadron series, the Jedi Academy young adult novels, a lot of stand alone novels like The Truce at Bakura and The Courtship of Princess Leia, and I've even been playing a bunch of games from that period such as Dark Forces, Rebel Assault 1 and 2, etc.  It took me years to even TRY to like Star Wars again, and this movie has kind of pushed me into reliving all this stuff, just so I can enjoy it ONE last time before it all goes totally to hell.
 
2014-01-21 01:04:39 AM  

kryptoknightmare: Remember when Star Wars was actually good?



No, as far as I remember, that's not a thing which ever happened, and I was born the year the first movie premiered.  They were always okay, but I could never understand the deep attachment so many people of my age cohort have formed to the films.
 
2014-01-21 01:08:35 AM  

Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.


Last I checked, Lawrence Kasdan has already signed on.
Besides, he could bring along a trio of retarded chimpanzee paint huffers and still come up with better dialogue than Lucas.
 
2014-01-21 01:10:57 AM  

Dow Jones and the Temple of Doom: A bunch of Jews shiat into a copier, set the page count to 120, and hit print.


Your screenplay sucks, Gentile.
 
2014-01-21 01:17:57 AM  

Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.


They took Toy Story 3 writer Michael Arndt off the script completely by re-writing it. It's just J.J. and Lawrence on this one. Lawrence scripted Empire and ROJ, so I hope he hasn't lost his creative chops.
 
2014-01-21 01:18:23 AM  
FTFA:

...but we're going to be shooting [Episode VII] on film."

That's kinda surprising, especially given that half the movie will probably be shot in front of a green screen.
 
2014-01-21 01:19:53 AM  

kryptoknightmare: Please just let Star Wars die.


Do what I did and just let it go.  It was an important part of my life growing up, but now it belongs to a different generation.
 
2014-01-21 01:20:52 AM  
How can you believe there's any integrity left in Star Wars after the forced anal sodomy by George Lucas in the new episodes?
 
2014-01-21 01:41:54 AM  
It is done, because most of the script is going to be ad-lib

And lightsabers are going to be replaced with LENSFLABRES!
 
2014-01-21 01:52:17 AM  

stoli n coke: Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.

Last I checked, Lawrence Kasdan has already signed on.
Besides, he could bring along a trio of retarded chimpanzee paint huffers and still come up with better dialogue than Lucas.


i.imgur.com
 
2014-01-21 01:56:34 AM  
I bet the Jews did this!
 
2014-01-21 01:56:53 AM  

Dwight_Yeast: kryptoknightmare: Remember when Star Wars was actually good?

No, as far as I remember, that's not a thing which ever happened, and I was born the year the first movie premiered.


Well there's your problem. Had you been an eight-year-old like myself your attitude might be different.
 
2014-01-21 02:04:49 AM  

Mentat: Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.

Wait until you see the ending Damon Lindelof wrote.


Don't even farking joke about that. That dude's got some sort of deal with Satan where he keeps getting work on high-profile scripts despite ruining everything he touches.
 
2014-01-21 02:08:52 AM  

Gunther: Mentat: Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.

Wait until you see the ending Damon Lindelof wrote.

Don't even farking joke about that. That dude's got some sort of deal with Satan where he keeps getting work on high-profile scripts despite ruining everything he touches.



He helped turn Prometheus into the steaming pile it would become. For that, I will never forgive him.
 
2014-01-21 02:09:14 AM  
Look, the only great Star Wars movie is Star Wars.  You can pretend the The Empire Strikes Back is better because it's "darker" but it's only good if you fast forward through all of the Yoda and Luke training crap.  Jedi was just a re-hash of the original Death Star threat in a forest that wasn't threatening.  At least Hoth was a dangerous environment and not a place where you'd want to go camping.
If episodes 1-3 were made without the Star Wars brand name attached to them, you think of them about as much as the Matrix sequels.
 
2014-01-21 02:13:09 AM  

Gunther: Mentat: Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.

Wait until you see the ending Damon Lindelof wrote.

Don't even farking joke about that. That dude's got some sort of deal with Satan where he keeps getting work on high-profile scripts despite ruining everything he touches.


Lindelof's films have grossed nearly 2 billion dollars in total - that's why he keeps getting work.
 
2014-01-21 02:13:57 AM  

Snapper Carr: stoli n coke: Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.

Last I checked, Lawrence Kasdan has already signed on.
Besides, he could bring along a trio of retarded chimpanzee paint huffers and still come up with better dialogue than Lucas.

[i.imgur.com image 299x444]



Still had better dialogue than episodes I-III.
 
2014-01-21 02:24:34 AM  

Snapper Carr: Lindelof's films have grossed nearly 2 billion dollars in total - that's why he keeps getting work.


Sure, on projects that would have made money no matter who was writing the script. He's coasted on a reputation he's got from movies that succeeded in spite of him, not because of him.
 
2014-01-21 02:26:55 AM  

Mentat: kryptoknightmare: Please just let Star Wars die.

Do what I did and just let it go.  It was an important part of my life growing up, but now it belongs to a different generationAngry Birds and the guys who make the Lego games.


Star Wars still works, as long as it's being handled by people who enjoy the characters and settings but don't take any of it too seriously. And let's face it, instead of carrying on the stories of Luke, Han, Leia and the gang, what people really want is a complete reboot of the prequels. If Lucas was cool with wiping out the original Anakin guy from Jedi and replacing him with Hayden Whatshisface, then it should be cool to wipe out all three of those effects reel timewasters and replace them with something worth watching.
 
2014-01-21 02:35:52 AM  

Mentat: Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.

Wait until you see the ending Damon Lindelof wrote.



It would be the first ending he's ever written. Dude cannot figure out how to wrap up a story, it's all plot threads and complications with no resolution in sight. If he partnered with someone who knew how to tie up wild fanciful ideas into a coherent ending, there'd be a lot less movie fans wanting him dead.
 
2014-01-21 02:49:03 AM  

stoli n coke: Snapper Carr: stoli n coke: Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.

Last I checked, Lawrence Kasdan has already signed on.
Besides, he could bring along a trio of retarded chimpanzee paint huffers and still come up with better dialogue than Lucas.

[i.imgur.com image 299x444]

Still had better dialogue than episodes I-III.


"I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth."
 
2014-01-21 02:57:14 AM  

BadReligion: Gunther: Mentat: Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.

Wait until you see the ending Damon Lindelof wrote.

Don't even farking joke about that. That dude's got some sort of deal with Satan where he keeps getting work on high-profile scripts despite ruining everything he touches.

He helped turn Prometheus into the steaming pile it would become. For that, I will never forgive him.


I'm not one to turn into a raging fanboy but I kind of feel you on this. I read what the plot of Prometheus was before Lindelhof's treatment and it actually made sense. It was a much more satisfying story than what I saw on the screen.

I don't wish ill on him, per se, but if he ends up like M. Night Shyamalan relegated to doing Hollywood's biatch-work, that would be great.
 
2014-01-21 03:06:01 AM  

spamdog: How can you believe there's any integrity left in Star Wars after the forced anal sodomy by George Lucas in the new episodes?


The prequels were hugely successful films. Weather you, enjoyed them or not, is entirely up to you.

I enjoyed them.
 
2014-01-21 03:15:25 AM  
I'm doing my part in not watching it. The Star Wars prequels spoiled it. Didn't see the last one until a couple of years later. =/
 
2014-01-21 03:18:39 AM  
Could be worse. Could be an Emmerich production.
 
2014-01-21 03:42:47 AM  

Darth_Lukecash: The prequels were hugely successful films. Weather you, enjoyed them or not, is entirely up to you.


Of course it's entirely up to me! He did ass to mouth on Star Wars with those prequels!
 
2014-01-21 03:56:00 AM  
Lemme guess, their corvette crashes on this uncharted planet and a bunch of weird things start to happen to the survivors?
 
2014-01-21 03:56:15 AM  

stoli n coke: Mugato: Just please don't let him bring in the same writers he uses for everything else.

Last I checked, Lawrence Kasdan has already signed on.
Besides, he could bring along a trio of retarded chimpanzee paint huffers and still come up with better dialogue than Lucas.


Amusingly, Lucas hired Tom Stoppard (hands down the best living English-language playwright) to punch up the love scenes in Episode II and he still ended up with lines like "Kiss me like you kissed me by the Lake at Naboo!"

/Lucas is a vortex of suck
//who pulls all things into his suckage
 
2014-01-21 03:58:31 AM  

Freschel: I'm doing my part in not watching it. The Star Wars prequels spoiled it. Didn't see the last one until a couple of years later. =/


I maintain that phantom menace is only bearable--and then, only just--with rifftrax accompaniment. I didn't see it until sometime in 06-07ish with the aid of rifftrax, and I was still blown away at how egregiously shiatty it is. 2 and 3 are just run-of-the-mill overproduced pulp shiat, but menace is in a class of its own.
 
2014-01-21 04:18:09 AM  
The primary audience for this movie weren't born yet when Episode I was in cinemas and their primary contact with Star Wars is the Clone Wars cartoon. They care little for your Thrawns or Mara Jades. You'll go to Episode VII because your kids want to see it. You might enjoy it, but your kids will enjoy it more.
 
2014-01-21 04:19:20 AM  
Oh boy, another JJ Abrams Derangement Syndrome thread.

Fact: JJ Abrams on his worst day will constantly outshine anything Lucas has done post-1983 on his best day.

Lens flares, apple store interiors, and shakey camera angles do not stack up to Jar-Jar Binks, Hayden Christensen, and any of the other gimmicky horseshiat Lucas put in the prequels. If that's the best criticism anyone has of JJ Abrams, then the writing is on the wall Episode VII simply can not be as bad or worse than the prequels.

And people will still buy tickets to Episode VII knowing they're going to hate it.
 
2014-01-21 05:28:26 AM  

Dwight_Yeast: Amusingly, Lucas hired Tom Stoppard (hands down the best living English-language playwright) to punch up the love scenes in Episode II and he still ended up with lines like "Kiss me like you kissed me by the Lake at Naboo!"


I don't believe that. There was no Stoppard-esque ping pong banter in it.
 
2014-01-21 05:34:38 AM  

MusicMakeMyHeadPound: I'm not one to turn into a raging fanboy but I kind of feel you on this. I read what the plot of Prometheus was before Lindelhof's treatment and it actually made sense. It was a much more satisfying story than what I saw on the screen.


The bizarre thing about that is that pretty much the only changes he made were to cut references to it being in the same universe as the Aliens franchise (but not all the references; just the ones that actually make sense and explain stuff, like it being set on the same planet as in Alien and the engineer being infected with a Xenomorph) and to cut a bunch of expository scenes that made the plot coherent. The film is confusing and unsatisfying as a result because you're never sure what the fark is happening or why anyone does anything.

I genuinely would like to sit down with him and just ask what the fark he was hoping to achieve with it.
 
2014-01-21 05:36:04 AM  
If Episode VII contained flashbacks that retold I-III with different background stories, characters and plot - essentially releasing the prequels to the grave - I would pledge my devotion to Disney.
 
2014-01-21 06:07:31 AM  

kryptoknightmare: Remember when Star Wars was actually good?

[img.fark.net image 500x375]

Please just let Star Wars die.  With very, very few exceptions (Knights of the Old Republic) everything they've made since 1996 has been total garbage.  The more they make, the more they destroy. I lost whatever small amount of hope I had in this project when JJ Abrams was attached to it.  I've disliked everything I've ever seen from him, particularly the absolutely revolting Star Trek remakes of his.   What pisses me off most about this film is that this one is going to shiat on BOTH of thetwo aspects of Star Wars that I still hold near and dear to me:

1) The original, unaltered movies
2) The original expanded universe of the late 80's and early 90's

No matter what they do they're going to kill the expanded universe.  I've actually been re-reading a lot of the original EU material for the first time since I was a kid, such as the West End Games roleplaying game books, the Thrawn trilogy, the Dark Empire comics, the Rogue Squadron series, the Jedi Academy young adult novels, a lot of stand alone novels like The Truce at Bakura and The Courtship of Princess Leia, and I've even been playing a bunch of games from that period such as Dark Forces, Rebel Assault 1 and 2, etc.  It took me years to even TRY to like Star Wars again, and this movie has kind of pushed me into reliving all this stuff, just so I can enjoy it ONE last time before it all goes totally to hell.


I agree with everything you have just stated.
 
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