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(Fox News)   Massive sinkhole opens up in Detroit. City officials say the huge gaping vortex of emptiness will have to put up with the sinkhole until they can fix it   (foxnews.com) divider line 90
    More: Scary, Detroit, sinkholes, Michigan Department of Transportation, city managers  
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10857 clicks; posted to Main » on 20 Jan 2014 at 2:01 PM (47 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



90 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-01-20 12:36:11 PM  
My God will you stop picking on Detroit!!

Sooner or later you're just picking on a cripple.
 
2014-01-20 01:41:33 PM  
It's reported the collapse was caused by Dee Dee Sharp attempting to cross the street.

esg6rzdhdg9i115s.zippykid.netdna-cdn.com

Looks like she ate too much of the mashed potatoes.
 
2014-01-20 02:03:05 PM  
10 feet wide and 14 feet deep is massive? Subbys mom chortles at those dimensions.
 
2014-01-20 02:03:10 PM  
Did they find the ship?
 
2014-01-20 02:03:13 PM  
Somehow, someway, an asshat will blame Snyder and the EFM for this.
 
2014-01-20 02:04:31 PM  
Would it not be more accurate to say that a Detroit opened up in the sinkhole?
 
2014-01-20 02:05:20 PM  
"Don't pick on Detroit; them folks living in Mad Max times."  -- Moe, The Simpsons


That said, a big enough sinkhole solves all of Detroits woes...
 
2014-01-20 02:05:35 PM  
How can a hole have mass?
 
2014-01-20 02:06:35 PM  

The Stealth Hippopotamus: My God will you stop picking on Detroit!!

Sooner or later you're just picking on a cripple.



Is it okay to make fun of someone who made themselves a cripple? Like they were playing with power tools and removed their own butt?
 
2014-01-20 02:08:02 PM  
 
2014-01-20 02:08:25 PM  
I thought Detroit was the name given to a sinkhole in Michigan.
 
2014-01-20 02:08:27 PM  

Boojum2k: The Stealth Hippopotamus: My God will you stop picking on Detroit!!

Sooner or later you're just picking on a cripple.


Is it okay to make fun of someone who made themselves a cripple? Like they were playing with power tools and removed their own butt?


I hope so.  If not, I'm a horrible person.
 
2014-01-20 02:08:56 PM  
Is it wrong to cheer for the sinkhole?
 
2014-01-20 02:09:36 PM  
Quick!  Fill it up with money!
 
2014-01-20 02:09:52 PM  

detroitdoesntsuckthatbad: Somehow, someway, an asshat will blame Snyder and the EFM for this.


Why would anybody blame EMF for this, that's UNBELIEVABLE, OH!!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waacof2saZw

/yes, I know...
 
2014-01-20 02:10:53 PM  
userserve-ak.last.fm
 
2014-01-20 02:12:18 PM  

Tarl3k: detroitdoesntsuckthatbad: Somehow, someway, an asshat will blame Snyder and the EFM for this.

Why would anybody blame EMF for this, that's UNBELIEVABLE, OH!!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=waacof2saZw

/yes, I know...

www.quickmeme.com
 
2014-01-20 02:12:41 PM  
I blame Bush
 
2014-01-20 02:16:29 PM  
That's a pothole in Florida.
 
2014-01-20 02:17:20 PM  
Well, it's a start....
 
2014-01-20 02:17:37 PM  
As I posted in another thread, I was on the phone with a headhunter about a year ago while looking for a job:

Headhunter: "Are you opening to relocate?"

Me: "Yes, sure.  I'm open to changing my city or state.  I'm single with no dependents."

Headhunter: "Well we have a great position that would be a good fit for you in Detroit, Michigan."

Me:  "Actually, anywhere except Detroit."

Headhunter:  "Understood"
 
2014-01-20 02:18:01 PM  

abfalter: BY the way, Detroit has massive salt mines deep underneath the city.



What we need to do is drill from the lake bed into the salt mines. That way we can destroy the city a la the Lake Peigenur disaster.
 
2014-01-20 02:18:19 PM  
Um, what has your town done to put it on a cultural par with Detroit?
 
2014-01-20 02:21:19 PM  

signaljammer: Um, what has your town done to put it on a cultural par with Detroit?


My guess as to most people's response:  Not be 18billion dollars in debt from years of cronyism and mismanagement - that kind of trumps every other argument.
 
2014-01-20 02:25:28 PM  
If they're interested...

I think I have a plan to fix it...

i.dailymail.co.uk
 
2014-01-20 02:27:33 PM  

deanis: 10 feet wide and 14 feet deep is massive? Subbys mom chortles at those dimensions.


What he said.

That's a sad little sinkhole that probably didn't even swallow a single house or car. Florida laughs at your pathetic Northern sinkholes.

There ain't no sinkhole like a Southern sinkhole.

A Florida sinkhole could swallow Pandemonium and Detroit combined.
 
2014-01-20 02:27:36 PM  
You win sinkhole, but can we keep the Red Wings?
 
db2
2014-01-20 02:29:28 PM  
"Downtown Detroit hit by massive Detroit"
 
2014-01-20 02:31:05 PM  

Buttknuckle: As I posted in another thread, I was on the phone with a headhunter about a year ago while looking for a job:

Headhunter: "Are you opening to relocate?"

Me: "Yes, sure.  I'm open to changing my city or state.  I'm single with no dependents."

Headhunter: "Well we have a great position that would be a good fit for you in Detroit, Michigan."

Me:  "Actually, anywhere except Detroit."

Headhunter:  "Understood"


Mind you, as far as salaries are concerned:

* Detroit: $60K (3 times.  That seems to be fairly standard)
* Chicago: $45K in burbs, $55K in loop
* Madison, WI: $90K, but there's a DailyWTF article expressly about the company so no.
* SF: $70K + stock
* Connecticut: $80K
* Seattle: $90K + signing bonus + relo + seriously, it's a 4-year long money train that 70% of people leave in 3 years.

And then you live in the burbs (read: At least 4 miles from majority black people.  I really hate to say it, but it's 95% accurate) on a lake somewhere, and own your own house at 25 while taking a week off every year to go do whatever cool thing it is that you want to do in [Insert Actual Big City or multiple national parks here].

/I mean yes, Detroit, but Detroit burbs are awesome and totally affordable.   Plus all the Great Lakes, 2 hours from Cedar Point, etc, etc.
//IMO, the way to think about it is: "Ok, I'm living in NYC, but I can't afford to do any of the cool stuff that's WHY you come to NYC because I'm flat broke.  Or I can live in [insert cheap,
mid sized Midwestern city here] and travel to all the cool places".
///I've been to SF more times while living in Michigan than while living in Mountain View.
 
2014-01-20 02:40:20 PM  
"Age is always a factor - that's going to be the kind of thing that's going to have to be determined as well," she said

That abbreviated quote doesn't even make sense, right?
 
2014-01-20 02:44:22 PM  
City officials say, "It's just a pothole. Drive around it".
 
2014-01-20 02:46:47 PM  
I read the headline as "Stinkhole" being in Detriot it probably was stinky!
 
2014-01-20 02:48:54 PM  
Pffft, unless it swallows up at least an entire city block I do not think that the word "massive" should apply.
 
2014-01-20 02:50:21 PM  
I just want to point out that "massive" means having great mass.  It doesn't just mean "big".  An elephant is massive.  The sun is massive.  A hole cannot be massive, no matter how large.
 
2014-01-20 02:52:14 PM  
You want to be depressed!? I mean "why go on living" depressed?

anthony bourdain parts unknown detroit

The sad thing is he isn't doing a hit piece. He is trying as hard as he can to put a positive spin on things and show a bright side.
 
2014-01-20 02:53:34 PM  
meyerkev:
* Detroit: $60K (3 times.  That seems to be fairly standard)
...
* Seattle: $90K + signing bonus + relo + seriously, it's a 4-year long money train that 70% of people leave in 3 years.


Having lived in one, and near the other, I'd take Detroit over Seattle any day, just because of the people.

Protip:
"Canadian ballet" in Detroit means going to Windsor to pick up hookers.
"Canadian ballet" in Seattle means going to Vancouver to see an actual ballet performance.

There is no cure for that kind of disappointment.
 
2014-01-20 02:55:30 PM  

KarmicDisaster: How can a hole have mass?


Yes. Black holes have mass.

/ready
//set
///go with racist retort
 
2014-01-20 03:03:51 PM  
Detroit.

/it would be a fine place if they can just figure out how to shrink it.  The city, that is.
 
2014-01-20 03:05:59 PM  

uber humper: Detroit.

/it would be a fine place if they can just figure out how to shrink it.  The city, that is.


i.imgur.com


Pic didn't Weeners time. Stupid anti-leech controls
 
2014-01-20 03:08:05 PM  
How the hell did they even notice it? The potholes are out of control. I wouldn't even notice a sinkhole.

My car is so f*cked.
 
2014-01-20 03:13:34 PM  

megarian: How the hell did they even notice it? The potholes are out of control. I wouldn't even notice a sinkhole.

My car is so f*cked.



No kidding.  The last month or so, Mound seems to have turned into a gravel road.  I've got a buddy who's popped 3 tires on his Fiat in the last 3 weeks.
 
2014-01-20 03:16:21 PM  

uber humper: uber humper: Detroit.

/it would be a fine place if they can just figure out how to shrink it.  The city, that is.

[i.imgur.com image 600x396]


Pic didn't Weeners time. Stupid anti-leech controls


Man, Fark is kind of owning you today, isn't it?
 
2014-01-20 03:17:29 PM  

uncleacid: That's a pothole in Florida.


No, "The Pothole" is a medical marijuana store in Colorado. Detroit is a sinkhole that was run by an arsehole and is now a shiathole.
 
2014-01-20 03:21:36 PM  

ubermensch: megarian: How the hell did they even notice it? The potholes are out of control. I wouldn't even notice a sinkhole.

My car is so f*cked.


No kidding.  The last month or so, Mound seems to have turned into a gravel road.  I've got a buddy who's popped 3 tires on his Fiat in the last 3 weeks.


Mound is just awful. I went into Pontiac/Auburn Hills last week (on Joslyn rd) and...my god...there weren't even painted lanes. Just potholes where the paint used to be. For miles. I can get pulled over for a goddamn crack in my windshield but the roads can be chunks of cement and asphalt semi-held together by a patchwork of tar and spit? Awesome.
 
2014-01-20 03:28:29 PM  

brantgoose: What he said.
That's a sad little sinkhole that probably didn't even swallow a single house or car. Florida laughs at your pathetic Northern sinkholes.
There ain't no sinkhole like a Southern sinkhole.
A Florida sinkhole could swallow Pandemonium and Detroit combined.


They look bigger up north because in Florida they just fill them up with alligators and all the dead manatees. They don't have manatees in Detroit. At least, not the kind that can just be thrown in big gaping holes. I'm not sure about the alligators.
 
2014-01-20 03:29:15 PM  

cryinoutloud: brantgoose: What he said.
That's a sad little sinkhole that probably didn't even swallow a single house or car. Florida laughs at your pathetic Northern sinkholes.
There ain't no sinkhole like a Southern sinkhole.
A Florida sinkhole could swallow Pandemonium and Detroit combined.

They look bigger up north because in Florida they just fill them up with alligators and all the dead manatees. They don't have manatees in Detroit. At least, not the kind that can just be thrown in big gaping holes. I'm not sure about the alligators.


There's alligators.
 
2014-01-20 03:32:22 PM  
...And dragons.
 
2014-01-20 03:32:42 PM  
Thanks alot Obama
 
2014-01-20 03:33:58 PM  

Crass and Jaded Mother Farker: If they're interested...

I think I have a plan to fix it...

[i.dailymail.co.uk image 634x443]


Nice. Got a link to the article that picture is from? For research purposes, you understand.
 
2014-01-20 03:39:41 PM  

megarian: ...And dragons.


yeah, I know what's wrong with your car. You need to lay off the drugs before driving, because they make you think you're flying. You're not even on the road.
 
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