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(Reuters)   You wouldn't expect TWO headlines on the same day about people getting randomly attacked by hammer-wielding psychos, but... well, here we are   (reuters.com) divider line 50
    More: Scary, Chino Police Department, hammers  
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2472 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jan 2014 at 6:30 PM (26 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



50 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-01-17 04:51:10 PM
Tactical hammers?
With black nylon handles?


Mmmmmmmmmm. Black nylons.
 
2014-01-17 05:07:11 PM
thelavalizard.com
 
2014-01-17 05:25:17 PM
....and when they ban the hammers, they will pick up sticks
 
2014-01-17 06:32:36 PM
And not to sound the alarm, but they say these hammer attacks happen in THREES.
 
2014-01-17 06:32:44 PM
If hammers are outlawed, only outlaws will have hammers.
 
2014-01-17 06:32:49 PM
farking maxwell
 
2014-01-17 06:33:23 PM
Better a hammer than a buzz-axe.

/Been marathoning Borderlands 2
 
2014-01-17 06:35:50 PM
Oldboy is really going all out for their viral marketing.
 
2014-01-17 06:36:37 PM
When all you have is a hammer, everybody's head looks like a nail.
 
2014-01-17 06:39:50 PM
The other headline was yesterday but within a 24 hour period... so I guess it depends what time zone you're in.  Fark it, close enough.
 
2014-01-17 06:40:55 PM
I knew a guy who was attacked with a hammer. If I told the whole story, though, you guys would just accuse me of bull shiat.
 
2014-01-17 06:42:03 PM

Hollie Maea: I knew a guy who was attacked with a hammer. If I told the whole story, though, you guys would just accuse me of bull shiat.


You're right. You haven't even told the story, and I'm already at that conclusion.
 
2014-01-17 06:43:56 PM
Did he hammer in the morning? Did he hammer in the evening, all over this land?
 
2014-01-17 06:45:07 PM
He could have hammered in the morning or the evening.
 
2014-01-17 06:46:32 PM
Well, I guess they nailed him down.
 
2014-01-17 06:47:50 PM

uncleacid: He could have hammered in the morning or the evening.


I could have refreshed.
 
2014-01-17 06:48:04 PM
Now is the time to talk about hammer control.
 
2014-01-17 06:48:15 PM
Bang bang Maxwell!
 
2014-01-17 06:51:25 PM
Here we are.
 
2014-01-17 06:51:51 PM
Why won't the MSM media talk about the epidemic of the Hammer Game?
 
2014-01-17 06:57:02 PM

moogoob: Better a hammer than a buzz-axe.

/Been marathoning Borderlands 2


Heh, me too. Still have yet to get my Psycho past level 12, though.
 
2014-01-17 07:03:37 PM
www.comicbookmovie.com
 
2014-01-17 07:22:03 PM
Apropos.

fc09.deviantart.net
 
2014-01-17 07:23:29 PM
Second awakening call in the row
oi42.tinypic.com
 
2014-01-17 07:25:58 PM
i.imgur.com
 
2014-01-17 07:29:59 PM
i262.photobucket.com
 
2014-01-17 07:32:49 PM

Combustion: When all you have is a hammer, everybody's head looks like a nail.


Shut up pinhead.


/or something. It was funnier in my mind.

//also, read the headline and expected a statistician to jump up and tell us that it IS expected statistically.
 
2014-01-17 07:41:25 PM
vudukungfu: Tactical hammers with black nylon handles

Rampaging vikings and pillaging Vandals
These are a few of my favorite things...
 
2014-01-17 07:43:19 PM

Agent Smiths Laugh: Hollie Maea: I knew a guy who was attacked with a hammer. If I told the whole story, though, you guys would just accuse me of bull shiat.

You're right. You haven't even told the story, and I'm already at that conclusion.


I have it on good authority that "Agent Smith Laughs" is not your real name.
 
2014-01-17 07:46:29 PM

doglover: [i.imgur.com image 362x245]


Acting, rewind the play
 
2014-01-17 07:50:45 PM

a particular individual: Agent Smiths Laugh: Hollie Maea: I knew a guy who was attacked with a hammer. If I told the whole story, though, you guys would just accuse me of bull shiat.

You're right. You haven't even told the story, and I'm already at that conclusion.

I have it on good authority that "Agent Smith Laughs" is not your real name.


Your sources are probably correct. Though there is a small margin of error.
 
2014-01-17 07:51:53 PM

Lenny_da_Hog: [i262.photobucket.com image 490x627]


cineplex.media.baselineresearch.com
 
2014-01-17 07:56:45 PM
Glamdring unavailable
 
2014-01-17 08:12:41 PM
ep.yimg.com

We need more hammer control and an assault hammer ban.  Clearly an ergonomic handle and black finish means it only has one purpose.
 
2014-01-17 08:15:02 PM
Picture of the suspect:

www.mariowiki.com
 
2014-01-17 08:25:33 PM
Callous,
We need more hammer control and an assault hammer ban. Clearly an ergonomic handle and black finish means it only has one purpose.


When one angry man with a hammer man murders twenty-some some primary students in five minutes let me know. I will actually be impressed, although disgusted at the same time.
 
2014-01-17 08:33:09 PM

AngryDragon: If hammers are out(c)lawed, only out(c)laws will have hammers.


FTFY

highfivetothat.files.wordpress.com

 
2014-01-17 08:55:37 PM

Enemabag Jones: Callous,
We need more hammer control and an assault hammer ban. Clearly an ergonomic handle and black finish means it only has one purpose.

When one angry man with a hammer man murders twenty-some some primary students in five minutes let me know. I will actually be impressed, although disgusted at the same time.


Yet not one person would talk about banning hammers.
/Blunt objects were used to murder more people in 2012 than rifles, and that included the scary 'assault weapons'
 
2014-01-17 08:58:05 PM

doglover:


Im gonna do what I shoulda done a long time ago.
 
2014-01-17 09:01:20 PM

Farkage: Enemabag Jones: Callous,
We need more hammer control and an assault hammer ban. Clearly an ergonomic handle and black finish means it only has one purpose.

When one angry man with a hammer man murders twenty-some some primary students in five minutes let me know. I will actually be impressed, although disgusted at the same time.

Yet not one person would talk about banning hammers.
/Blunt objects were used to murder more people in 2012 than rifles, and that included the scary 'assault weapons'


Yup most firearms deaths are handguns, blunt objects cause many more deaths than rifles
 
2014-01-17 09:08:55 PM
Oldiron_79
Farkage: Enemabag Jones: Callous,
We need more hammer control and an assault hammer ban. Clearly an ergonomic handle and black finish means it only has one purpose.
When one angry man with a hammer man murders twenty-some some primary students in five minutes let me know. I will actually be impressed, although disgusted at the same time.
Yet not one person would talk about banning hammers.
/Blunt objects were used to murder more people in 2012 than rifles, and that included the scary 'assault weapons'
Yup most firearms deaths are handguns, blunt objects cause many more deaths than rifles


I love how stats are used in this manner. How many of those blunt objects were used in an incident where more then one person was killed?

Factually you may be correct, but the intectually dishonest used create a political narrative is simply f**ked up.
 
2014-01-17 09:14:09 PM

Enemabag Jones: Oldiron_79
Farkage: Enemabag Jones: Callous,
We need more hammer control and an assault hammer ban. Clearly an ergonomic handle and black finish means it only has one purpose.
When one angry man with a hammer man murders twenty-some some primary students in five minutes let me know. I will actually be impressed, although disgusted at the same time.
Yet not one person would talk about banning hammers.
/Blunt objects were used to murder more people in 2012 than rifles, and that included the scary 'assault weapons'
Yup most firearms deaths are handguns, blunt objects cause many more deaths than rifles

I love how stats are used in this manner. How many of those blunt objects were used in an incident where more then one person was killed?

Factually you may be correct, but the intectually dishonest used create a political narrative is simply f**ked up.


Move goalposts much?
 
2014-01-17 09:20:30 PM

Fano: Glamdring unavailable



Sigmar wanted for questioning...
 
2014-01-17 09:24:52 PM

Enemabag Jones: Oldiron_79
Farkage: Enemabag Jones: Callous,
We need more hammer control and an assault hammer ban. Clearly an ergonomic handle and black finish means it only has one purpose.
When one angry man with a hammer man murders twenty-some some primary students in five minutes let me know. I will actually be impressed, although disgusted at the same time.
Yet not one person would talk about banning hammers.
/Blunt objects were used to murder more people in 2012 than rifles, and that included the scary 'assault weapons'
Yup most firearms deaths are handguns, blunt objects cause many more deaths than rifles

I love how stats are used in this manner. How many of those blunt objects were used in an incident where more then one person was killed?

Factually you may be correct, but the intectually dishonest used create a political narrative is simply f**ked up.


While I doubt there are many incidents of someone going full columbine with a blunt object Im sure there are plenty of incidents of at least 2 people killed. Blunt objects are pretty common in spontanious fit of rage type killings like come home and see your old lady banging another man and beat both of them to death with a ball bat type stuff. Also pretty common in prisons.
 
2014-01-17 09:37:53 PM
This guy was using the wrong tool. Take a page out of Patrick Bateman's book.

upstagedbydesign.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-01-17 10:10:21 PM
Responsible Hammer OwnerTM
 
2014-01-17 10:25:42 PM
Oldiron_79
Move goalposts much?


I don't think of myself as such. I like conversation and will admit when I have weak points in an argument. I don't need to use BS statistical abstractions to validate my own beliefs.

You are free to believe what you want to believe, I know I can't change your mind.
 
2014-01-18 02:05:23 AM
Wait, what?

blogs.artinfo.com
 
2014-01-18 09:31:57 AM
We must wegister hammers!!!
 
2014-01-18 11:46:46 AM

Enemabag Jones: Oldiron_79
Move goalposts much?

I don't think of myself as such. I like conversation and will admit when I have weak points in an argument. I don't need to use BS statistical abstractions to validate my own beliefs.

You are free to believe what you want to believe, I know I can't change your mind.


Does it count as a BS statistical abstraction when the purpose was strictly to add some perspective to an enormously emotionally charged debate?  I don't think it does.
Anybody that thinks banning scary "assault weapons" will make a noticeable impact on the crime rate has never heard of a pareto chart.
 
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