If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(io9)   What medieval armor worn by women really looked like; Skyrim modders clutching their knees are disappointed   (io9.com) divider line 41
    More: Interesting, Late Middle Ages Reconsidered, Byzantine, French Army, Joan of Arc, knees, J.M. Blythe, Canterbury  
•       •       •

25187 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Jan 2014 at 5:41 PM (34 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2014-01-16 05:43:47 PM
9 votes:
People keep telling me Skyrim is unrealistic. I just read an article that said real blacksmithing is much harder, and that they don't just repeatedly press A.
2014-01-16 05:13:39 PM
9 votes:
oyster.ignimgs.com
2014-01-16 06:05:51 PM
8 votes:
This is what male armour looked like though, right?

static.comicvine.com
2014-01-16 06:04:22 PM
7 votes:
The real question is what the battle squirrels were wearing:

lh3.googleusercontent.com
2014-01-16 02:44:07 PM
6 votes:
fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net
2014-01-16 05:51:03 PM
5 votes:
img.photobucket.com
2014-01-16 04:14:02 PM
5 votes:
Pretty sure this is a faithful and historical recreation:

baremaidens.org

fc00.deviantart.net

d24w6bsrhbeh9d.cloudfront.net
2014-01-16 05:54:12 PM
4 votes:

rjakobi: You ever had a boner inside of a metal codpiece?


upload.wikimedia.org
2014-01-16 06:10:11 PM
3 votes:

Monkeyhouse Zendo: baconbeard: This is what male armour looked like though, right?

[img.fark.net image 300x471]


I don't know what you're complaining about, it's not like young boys could develop a skewed perception of body image from something like that.


Fun fact: the fur under He-Man's belt is just his natural body hair.
2014-01-16 06:07:30 PM
3 votes:

Creoena: The real question is what the battle squirrels were wearing:

[lh3.googleusercontent.com image 512x342]


Or Battle Guinea Pigs...
encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com
2014-01-16 06:02:17 PM
3 votes:
Female fitted armor looked pretty much exactly like its male counterpart only a little more room in the chest area.

Right
25.media.tumblr.com

1-media-cdn.foolz.us

Wrong

static.fjcdn.com
2014-01-16 04:58:35 PM
3 votes:
www.amsterdamtrader.com
2014-01-17 04:48:01 AM
2 votes:
img.fark.net
2014-01-16 07:39:05 PM
2 votes:
i6.photobucket.com
2014-01-16 07:10:16 PM
2 votes:
Yes. And male warriors are always depicted in full-body covering, of course. . .

sciencefiction.com
2.bp.blogspot.com

assets.nydailynews.com

www.toplessrobot.com
wrongsideoftheart.com

Sorry, but this complaint just needs to stop. It's called the FANTASY genre for a reason.
2014-01-16 06:21:08 PM
2 votes:
img33.imageshack.us

4.bp.blogspot.com
2014-01-16 06:16:43 PM
2 votes:
I've grown out of being able to enjoy the tin-foil bikinis they tend to put female characters in. Now it mostly annoys me, because I know its an amature ploy to sell games with sex.

However, there's been a resurgence in dressing women appropriately for combat... And I fear its awoken a new fetish in me.
img.fark.net
2014-01-16 06:07:49 PM
2 votes:

baconbeard: This is what male armour looked like though, right?

img.fark.net



I don't know what you're complaining about, it's not like young boys could develop a skewed perception of body image from something like that.
2014-01-16 05:45:33 PM
2 votes:

Pocket Ninja: Beerguy: God bless Clyde Caldwell

I think there would be an awful lot of chafing associated with that suit.


Not for long. The first time you looked left or right suddenly, you'd gouge your eyes out, fall off the dragon, and die.
2014-01-16 08:51:33 PM
1 votes:

Spraynard Krueger: VladTheEmailer: Creoena: The real question is what the battle squirrels were wearing:

[lh3.googleusercontent.com image 512x342]

Or Battle Guinea Pigs...
[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 255x198]

Or battlecats!


I think the thread has already covered armoured pussy.
2014-01-16 08:33:40 PM
1 votes:

VladTheEmailer: Creoena: The real question is what the battle squirrels were wearing:

[lh3.googleusercontent.com image 512x342]

Or Battle Guinea Pigs...
[encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com image 255x198]

Or battlecats!


img0.etsystatic.com

2014-01-16 08:29:09 PM
1 votes:

djkutch: BenJammin: Actual armor women of that time wore.

[freethoughtblogs.com image 408x336]

WTF?

/The anal part would have shaved turds like something for a cake decoration.


Ye olde women must have made tiny little rabbit poops.
2014-01-16 08:17:05 PM
1 votes:

BenJammin: Actual armor women of that time wore.

[freethoughtblogs.com image 408x336]


WTF?

/The anal part would have shaved turds like something for a cake decoration.
2014-01-16 08:14:19 PM
1 votes:

zzrhardy: The sort of games/literature/comics that has skimpily armor clad women is aimed at men generally. Who cares what women think, they aren't the intended target audience.

It's like a guy picking up some romance novel aimed at women - you know with a shirtless Fabio on the front or some shiat, and complaining that all the ultra perfect male protagonists who will literally die if they don't get the girl are unrealistic. Who cares, read/watch/play something else.

Not everything is aimed at everyone, nor should it have to be.


There's a big difference here. Using your example, if a man picked up a romance novel and didn't like or "approve" of it for any reason, he'd simply shrug his shoulders and write his own romance novel that was more to his liking instead of complaining about it. Men fix things, women complain about them.

It's better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.
2014-01-16 07:08:41 PM
1 votes:

Corvus: What my video games are unrealistic??!?!?

Next thing they'll tell me the dragons in Skyrim aren't like actual real dragons!!!


Heh, ummmm they actually aren't real dragons. They're Wyverns

i.imgur.com
2014-01-16 06:44:37 PM
1 votes:
Actual armor women of that time wore.

freethoughtblogs.com
2014-01-16 06:34:25 PM
1 votes:

baconbeard: FunkOut: baconbeard: Monkeyhouse Zendo: baconbeard: This is what male armour looked like though, right?

[img.fark.net image 300x471]


I don't know what you're complaining about, it's not like young boys could develop a skewed perception of body image from something like that.

Isn't that because young boys are smart enough to know the difference between fantasy and reality?

No, it's because boys usually don't give a crap what they look like. On the other hand, it's usually the first thing a girl is judged on.

You sure about that? Why don't we ask the fat ugly guy in school if looks matter? You know, the guy everyone makes fun of.


Don't ask me about that, dude, I was just the ugly girl boys went out of their way to tell how disgusting she looked.

Besides, he said young boys. See, I am super super old and I recall the days when kids were playing with He-Man toys on the playground and eating their pudding pops and such, and you see the boys had messed up hair and dirt on their clothes and boogers and just did not give a damn. The girls, on the other hand, would have been mortified to be seen like that. It would have made them...ew, like, gross. You had strong boys and clever boys and funny boys but if you were a girl, well, by George, you'd better be a pretty girl or wishing you were a pretty girl. Then when we grew up, none of the girls expected the boys to look like He-Man but the boys did expect the girls to look like Barbies.

Anyhow, I struck gold in the backhills of Calleefornya back in '53 and spent that winter in a cave with pack of feral Mormons I eventually ended up selling to Chinese opium dealers for a crank operated movie projector and 10 barrels of fine Fresno olives.
2014-01-16 06:27:01 PM
1 votes:
th08.deviantart.net

I larp, lightning bolt!
th04.deviantart.net

Careful with that bow!

th02.deviantart.net
2014-01-16 06:12:39 PM
1 votes:
What my video games are unrealistic??!?!?

Next thing they'll tell me the dragons in Skyrim aren't like actual real dragons!!!
2014-01-16 06:12:15 PM
1 votes:

Mouser: Evans points to the tale of Margaret of Beverley, a woman who did indeed participate in the defense of Jerusalem while the city was under siege by Saladin during the Third Crusade.  Margaret's brother wrote that she wore a cooking pot on her head while she brought water to the men on the walls. Although her behavior is described as man-like, and Evans notes that it seems entirely plausible that anyone might find a cooking pot a handy piece of armor in a siege, he wonders if Margaret's headgear was invented to make her seem more womanly, or to create an absurd visual of a woman in war, using a woman's tools to defend herself.

I don't know about you, but I'd think twice about going up against someone wearing a pot on their head and armed with an assortment of kitchen knives and other potentially lethal cookware.


I prefer my colander
2014-01-16 06:10:32 PM
1 votes:

rjakobi: I don't think people get it. The reason women had scanty armor was because it enflamed the lusts of their male rivals and put them at a marked disadvantage. You ever had a boner inside of a metal codpiece? Very uncomfortable.

Probably that's why the Israeli military puts their female commandos in tiny miniskirted dress uniforms.


 fbcdn-profile-a.akamaihd.net
2014-01-16 06:09:49 PM
1 votes:
OK, geek time.  We came up with a house rule in D&D to explain this.  Just like heavy armor can dex cap you, full body coverage charisma caps you.  Resulted in some especially interesting challenges for paladins, who had to choose between AC and charisma until they could afford invisible armor.
2014-01-16 06:09:27 PM
1 votes:

Monkeyhouse Zendo: baconbeard: This is what male armour looked like though, right?

[img.fark.net image 300x471]


I don't know what you're complaining about, it's not like young boys could develop a skewed perception of body image from something like that.


Isn't that because young boys are smart enough to know the difference between fantasy and reality?
2014-01-16 06:05:44 PM
1 votes:

skinink: The io9 picture made me realize I haven't seen much of Leelee Sobieski in anything lately. At one point she was in a lot of stuff and now she's just in something here and there. I think she's cuter than Jennifer Lawrence.


Id hit it like Zapruder was filming it.
2014-01-16 06:04:28 PM
1 votes:
What's the complaint here? That video games don't look like real life?

On a related note, I can't wait for the release of "3rd Floor Cube Farm", I understand that they've realistically implemented flickering fluorescent lights and the snack machine i the break room is its own minigame. Best of 2014, I'm telling you.
2014-01-16 06:03:17 PM
1 votes:

Pocket Ninja: Beerguy: God bless Clyde Caldwell

I think there would be an awful lot of chafing associated with that suit.


In my pants?
2014-01-16 05:55:27 PM
1 votes:

Mega Steve: Beerguy: [wallpapershd3d.com image 850x637]

God bless Clyde Caldwell.

The "K" stands for Quality


C'mon she had to go three different truck-stop souvenir shops for that belt buckle!
2014-01-16 05:46:17 PM
1 votes:
I don't think people get it. The reason women had scanty armor was because it enflamed the lusts of their male rivals and put them at a marked disadvantage. You ever had a boner inside of a metal codpiece? Very uncomfortable.

Probably that's why the Israeli military puts their female commandos in tiny miniskirted dress uniforms.
2014-01-16 05:20:11 PM
1 votes:
wallpapershd3d.com

God bless Clyde Caldwell.
2014-01-16 04:41:17 PM
1 votes:
Anyone else remember that thing Keira Knightley was wearing in the King Arthur's final battle?
2014-01-16 04:37:00 PM
1 votes:

Ghastly: [fbcdn-sphotos-e-a.akamaihd.net image 850x680]


I am at least 69% sure there are other types of armor used in video games besides that one.
 
Displayed 41 of 41 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report