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(Mirror.co.uk)   Why did 100 chickens cross the road in Ohio? To move into some dead guy's place on the other side and start terrorizing the street   (mirror.co.uk) divider line 55
    More: Scary, Iowa  
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4072 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Jan 2014 at 11:14 AM (28 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



55 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2014-01-16 09:24:56 AM
That takes some pluck.
 
2014-01-16 09:27:36 AM
i1151.photobucket.com
♫ ♫ ♫ ♫ ♫ ♫
Psycho Chicken
Qu'est-ce que c'est
bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk bawk
better
Run run run run run run run away
♫ ♫ ♫ ♫ ♫ ♫
 
2014-01-16 09:46:54 AM
They don't have Teabaggers over there, so they probably aren't running away from them.
 
2014-01-16 09:55:53 AM
www.gibbleguts.com
 
2014-01-16 09:56:17 AM
"...said that she has started to feed the birds so that they do not starve. "

Well that will certainly stop them coming on your property won't it.
 
2014-01-16 10:30:08 AM
You know, nobody gave us our spot at the top of the food chain. We  earned it by killing and eating everything that farked with us.

lh3.googleusercontent.com
 
2014-01-16 10:44:34 AM

rikdanger: You know, nobody gave us our spot at the top of the food chain. We  earned it by killing and eating everything that farked with us.

[lh3.googleusercontent.com image 600x750]


We eat the sun?

I AM RAHU, THE SWALLOWER OF SUNS AND THE MASTER OF ECLIPSES. GAZE UPON MY AWESOMENESS AND DESPAIR

 
2014-01-16 10:51:58 AM

miss diminutive: rikdanger: You know, nobody gave us our spot at the top of the food chain. We  earned it by killing and eating everything that farked with us.

[lh3.googleusercontent.com image 600x750]

We eat the sun?I AM RAHU, THE SWALLOWER OF SUNS AND THE MASTER OF ECLIPSES. GAZE UPON MY AWESOMENESS AND DESPAIR


Soon....soon.
 
2014-01-16 11:03:41 AM
reactorfire.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-01-16 11:19:21 AM
Mr. Milo approves
Furry Tom snrks
 
2014-01-16 11:20:01 AM
Subby, this sounds like oh-HI-yah not oh-HI-oh.

Chickens can be lovely things. Nice fresh eggs, lovely fertilizer, tasty morsels.

They can also be walking vectors for disease, loud, bloody, mean, filthy, and smelly.*

*But so can in-laws.
 
2014-01-16 11:21:06 AM
recollectionbooks.com

Did they bring their choppers?
 
2014-01-16 11:24:12 AM
thegrownupya.files.wordpress.com
On the case!
 
2014-01-16 11:25:15 AM
Sigh. Chickens are not hard to catch. Find out where they're roosting -- they are creatures of habit -- and capture them at night when they're asleep.

Or, you know, use nets, if you insist on chasing panicked poultry around a subdivision.

Beautiful birds, though. Hope they're able to safely relocate the flock before the local raccoons and opossums get to them.
 
2014-01-16 11:25:47 AM
Crossman 760 pellet gun. Problem solved.
 
2014-01-16 11:25:47 AM
Plan for eradicating feral chickens:

1. Catch, kill, pluck, gut, rinse chicken
2. cut into pieces, brown on all sides in stock pot with a little oil or butter
3. add water, onions, pepper and herbs
4. simmer 1-2 hours over medium low, until tender. Serve with rice or potatoes
5. repeat steps 1-4 until feral chicken problem is solved.

Dee-licious!
 
2014-01-16 11:25:47 AM
If there was only some way to get rid of pesky, delicious creatures.
 
2014-01-16 11:26:24 AM
Why did the farmer cross the road?
Because his d&%k was stuck in one of the chickens
 
2014-01-16 11:26:45 AM
www.inflexwetrust.com

I got this, y'all.
 
2014-01-16 11:27:21 AM
img.fark.net
 
2014-01-16 11:32:05 AM
what the cluck??
 
2014-01-16 11:35:58 AM
Pluck you, ya mother clucker!
 
2014-01-16 11:37:57 AM
I would already be having chicken dinners.
 
2014-01-16 11:42:32 AM

beezeltown: Plan for eradicating feral chickens:

1. Catch, kill, pluck, gut, rinse chicken
2. cut into pieces, brown on all sides in stock pot with a little oil or butter
3. add water, onions, pepper and herbs
4. simmer 1-2 hours over medium low, until tender. Serve with rice or potatoes
5. repeat steps 1-4 until feral chicken problem is solved.

Dee-licious!


You have my skillet.
 
2014-01-16 11:45:32 AM
"Residents of Ohio"

WTF????

Really, Britons? Are you THAT STUPID? Let me explain something to you:
Area of Ohio: 116,096 square kilometers.
Area of the UK: 243,610 square kilometers.

OHIO IS NEARLY HALF THE SIZE OF YOUR WHOLE RINKY-DINK COUNTRY. Think about that, idiots. Saying that a single flock of chickens pose problem for "Residents of Ohio" is as stupid as saying the same number of chickens pose a problem for "Residents of Scotland" or "Residents of England".
 
2014-01-16 11:47:57 AM
jeezus lady, have another smoke.
 
2014-01-16 11:48:50 AM
Better put them on the no fly list.
 
2014-01-16 11:53:29 AM
If only there was a way to deal with excess chickens.
3.bp.blogspot.com
 
2014-01-16 11:54:43 AM

LeroyBourne: jeezus lady, have another smoke.


Bwhaha. I thought the same thing.


Why did 100 chickens cross the road in Ohio?

To get away from the crazy ass man who wanted to kidnap them and store them in his basement for a decade?

/Seriously, WTF Ohio.
 
2014-01-16 11:54:54 AM
Maybe if that one lady wasn't feeding them...
 
2014-01-16 11:58:13 AM

TheShavingofOccam123: Subby, this sounds like oh-HI-yah not oh-HI-oh.

Chickens can be lovely things. Nice fresh eggs, lovely fertilizer, tasty morsels.

They can also be walking vectors for disease, loud, bloody, mean, filthy, and smelly.*

*But so can in-laws.


Cool, I know have a way to refer to my in-laws / extended family and use the word vector in the same sentence.  Thanks!
---
I'd just gather a couple buddies, a few air rifles, and beer and start culling.  After the hunt, the drinking, feathering, and commence until everyone and their mother has a freezer full of ready to cook chicken.
 
2014-01-16 11:59:12 AM
EvilEgg [TotalFark]
2014-01-16 09:46:54 AM


They don't have Teabaggers over there, so they probably aren't running away from them.

Leftist political trolling is always welcome on fark.

But mention politics outside of the P. tab and you biatches moan like obama being farked by Hassan Rouhani
 
2014-01-16 11:59:33 AM
stuffy: Maybe if that one lady wasn't feeding fattening them up...
It's a process.
 
2014-01-16 12:08:05 PM
My mom is in Dayton; maybe I can sucker, err, ask her to get some pics. I wanna see the rampaging chickens.

And as for the Oh-hi-yah comment, I laughed my ass off. You are soooo right.
 
2014-01-16 12:20:58 PM
Huh, I was going to guess they crossed the road to get to the dumplings...
 
2014-01-16 12:21:32 PM
chickens are more fun to watch than a lot of what's on tv

1.bp.blogspot.com
and they enjoy watching you too
 
2014-01-16 12:29:09 PM
ecx.images-amazon.com

He WARNED us!!!
 
2014-01-16 12:36:23 PM

EvilEgg: They don't have Teabaggers over there, so they probably aren't running away from them.


Ever so lame. Keep trying.
 
2014-01-16 12:49:47 PM

CygnusDarius: beezeltown: Plan for eradicating feral chickens:

1. Catch, kill, pluck, gut, rinse chicken
2. cut into pieces, brown on all sides in stock pot with a little oil or butter
3. add water, onions, pepper and herbs
4. simmer 1-2 hours over medium low, until tender. Serve with rice or potatoes
5. repeat steps 1-4 until feral chicken problem is solved.

Dee-licious!

You have my skillet.


And my spatula
 
2014-01-16 01:08:55 PM
My hometown...gotta love it!
 
2014-01-16 01:16:58 PM
~Causing damage to properties, the naughty chickens have caused  residents are urging local authorities to take action as no one has claimed ownership for them.


English muttaclucker do you speak it ?

This is 5 miles from my house, what's for dinner ?
 
2014-01-16 01:37:43 PM

MechaPyx: CygnusDarius: beezeltown: Plan for eradicating feral chickens:

1. Catch, kill, pluck, gut, rinse chicken
2. cut into pieces, brown on all sides in stock pot with a little oil or butter
3. add water, onions, pepper and herbs
4. simmer 1-2 hours over medium low, until tender. Serve with rice or potatoes
5. repeat steps 1-4 until feral chicken problem is solved.

Dee-licious!

You have my skillet.

And my spatula


And my platter.
 
2014-01-16 01:45:35 PM

MechaPyx: CygnusDarius: beezeltown: Plan for eradicating feral chickens:

1. Catch, kill, pluck, gut, rinse chicken
2. cut into pieces, brown on all sides in stock pot with a little oil or butter
3. add water, onions, pepper and herbs
4. simmer 1-2 hours over medium low, until tender. Serve with rice or potatoes
5. repeat steps 1-4 until feral chicken problem is solved.

Dee-licious!

You have my skillet.

And my spatula


How dare you suggest killing and eating such magnificent creatures

Without garlic.
And maybe a little white wine.
 
2014-01-16 02:10:12 PM
Just a quick twist and .... dinner is a cookin'

/that's not a euphemism
//sickos
 
2014-01-16 02:10:16 PM
Free range chicken is farking expensive.
 
2014-01-16 02:14:29 PM
Woman in video: "This is supposed to be the city limits. It's the OUTER LIMITS. Heh heh"

Yeah, more like "V" based on your voice.
 
2014-01-16 02:37:25 PM
oh ffs, just eat them.
 
2014-01-16 03:01:25 PM
You know what we did on the farm when a chicken copped an attitude and got nasty with one of us? We had that farker for dinner that night.

I see a whole lot of free range hot wings and nuggets runnin' around.
 
2014-01-16 03:03:46 PM

Silly_Sot: "Residents of Ohio"

WTF????

Really, Britons? Are you THAT STUPID? Let me explain something to you:
Area of Ohio: 116,096 square kilometers.
Area of the UK: 243,610 square kilometers.

OHIO IS NEARLY HALF THE SIZE OF YOUR WHOLE RINKY-DINK COUNTRY. Think about that, idiots. Saying that a single flock of chickens pose problem for "Residents of Ohio" is as stupid as saying the same number of chickens pose a problem for "Residents of Scotland" or "Residents of England".


Are you saying that they are not, in fact, residents of Ohio?  The article does go on to say Montgomery Avenue, it describes the local authorities as 'Authorities in Fairborn'  and it mentions a 'Montomery County',  so I think it's okay for a subtitle.  I think that we can flesh it out from that if anybody cared.  Being a British site (admittedly read world wide) are any of the UK readers likely to care that this chicken problem is occurring at 1502 Montgomery Avenue, Fairborn, Ohio, 45324-3113? ... Probably not.
 
2014-01-16 03:15:23 PM

Feed_The_Walrus: Silly_Sot: "Residents of Ohio"

WTF????

Really, Britons? Are you THAT STUPID? Let me explain something to you:
Area of Ohio: 116,096 square kilometers.
Area of the UK: 243,610 square kilometers.

OHIO IS NEARLY HALF THE SIZE OF YOUR WHOLE RINKY-DINK COUNTRY. Think about that, idiots. Saying that a single flock of chickens pose problem for "Residents of Ohio" is as stupid as saying the same number of chickens pose a problem for "Residents of Scotland" or "Residents of England".

Are you saying that they are not, in fact, residents of Ohio?  The article does go on to say Montgomery Avenue, it describes the local authorities as 'Authorities in Fairborn'  and it mentions a 'Montomery County',  so I think it's okay for a subtitle.  I think that we can flesh it out from that if anybody cared.  Being a British site (admittedly read world wide) are any of the UK readers likely to care that this chicken problem is occurring at 1502 Montgomery Avenue, Fairborn, Ohio, 45324-3113? ... Probably not.



Honestly, the very next thread I went into I found this:

Dog Welder:"And more importantly, the people of the state of Ohio should be appalled at what was done here today in their names."
As a resident of Ohio, I'm more appalled at what this jerk did to warrant the death penalty.

 It made me laugh ...
 
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