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(Boing Boing)   You know what they say about men with big feet don't you? You don't? Maybe you should read some of my Bigfoot fanfic?   (boingboing.net) divider line 106
    More: Weird  
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4194 clicks; posted to Main » on 16 Jan 2014 at 12:25 AM (13 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



106 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2014-01-15 08:07:32 PM
Men with big feet have...big shoes.
/Try the veal
 
2014-01-15 08:11:28 PM
Using the word "boob" in erotica is pretty childish.
 
2014-01-15 08:18:07 PM
Size 13 here.  Sorry ladies, flattered but taken.
 
2014-01-15 08:28:02 PM
I heard it was the length of men's fingers, not foot size.

/With 11EE feet, I should, at least, be thicker.
 
2014-01-15 08:43:14 PM
I am hung like a sperm whale. Minus the whale. If you catch my drift, ladies.
 
2014-01-15 08:45:22 PM
$30,000 a month?

Well fark me with a Yeti.

Maybe I should start with something smaller like a wood gnome and work my way up to Nessie.
 
2014-01-15 09:06:47 PM
An erotic tale about a hairy man-ape who lives in the woods, rarely bathes and likely wipes its ass with leaves and bark? This can't be real....wait....

cdnl.complex.com

cdnl.complex.com

cdnl.complex.com

...nevermind

/personally haven't noticed a big foot = big package correlation
//anecdotally not a skank
 
2014-01-15 09:28:47 PM

miss diminutive: An erotic tale about a hairy man-ape who lives in the woods, rarely bathes and likely wipes its ass with leaves and bark? This can't be real....wait....

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

...nevermind



None of those guys are hairy at all. What is it with trashy romance novels and twinks ?


/personally haven't noticed a big foot = big package correlation
//anecdotally not a skank



Maybe but he plural of anecdote is skank.
 
2014-01-15 09:45:27 PM
I think I'm going to start my own series about a Bigfoot that has a creepy BDSM relationship with a dinosaur. Now I just need a title...
 
2014-01-15 09:57:33 PM

AirForceVet: I heard it was the length of men's fingers, not foot size.

/With 11EE feet, I should, at least, be thicker.


11EEEE. Gotta actually be thick to be thick
 
2014-01-15 10:36:01 PM

miss diminutive: An erotic tale about a hairy man-ape who lives in the woods, rarely bathes and likely wipes its ass with leaves and bark? This can't be real....wait....

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

...nevermind

/personally haven't noticed a big foot = big package correlation
//anecdotally not a skank


What about empirically?
 
2014-01-15 11:29:52 PM
s.mlkshk.com
i2.listal.com
Ladies...
 
2014-01-15 11:32:12 PM

AirForceVet: I heard it was the length of men's fingers, not foot size.

/With 11EE feet, I should, at least, be thicker.


Size 14, and I can reach a 12th on a piano with each hand (e.g. middle C to a high G). So... yeah.
 
2014-01-16 12:26:57 AM
No subby just NO
 
2014-01-16 12:31:16 AM
Hey guys, just got here... what's going on in this thread?

*skims*

Oh. Oh, okay....

i1309.photobucket.com

*sigh*
 
2014-01-16 12:35:30 AM
They were big socks?
 
2014-01-16 12:39:28 AM

miss diminutive: An erotic tale about a hairy man-ape who lives in the woods, rarely bathes and likely wipes its ass with leaves and bark? This can't be real....wait....

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

...nevermind

/personally haven't noticed a big foot = big package correlation
//anecdotally not a skank


I'll see your creepy but (mostly) human erotic novels and raise you... DINO-SMUT.

pixel.nymag.com
 
2014-01-16 12:43:19 AM
WTF?

/That is all
 
2014-01-16 12:43:43 AM

brap: $30,000 a month?

Well fark me with a Yeti.

Maybe I should start with something smaller like a wood gnome and work my way up to Nessie.


My David the Gnome erotica will make me millions! Millions, I say!
 
2014-01-16 12:48:25 AM
6'5" with a size 14 foot.

Yes, I fear breaking smallish women who see me as a potential cuddly teaddy bear.
 
2014-01-16 12:50:25 AM
Who the hell pays for poorly-written, badly-plotted erotica? That's like 1/3 of the internet's free porn cache right there.
 
2014-01-16 12:50:57 AM
Would anyone be interested in purchasing my up coming novel, Heil Clitler; it's a erotic taboo fiction about a young Jewish woman who falls in love with the transgender ghost of Adolf (Addy) Hitler.

It's as sexy as it is offensive

/well maybe a little more offensive.
 
2014-01-16 12:52:36 AM
People with bigger body parts typically have bigger body parts. Like fat chicks with big boobs... What do they call them on porn sites? BBW's, or Big Breast Whales or whatever
 
2014-01-16 12:55:54 AM
Clearly I need to finish my fantasy-erotica, and fast.

/that's what she said...
 
2014-01-16 12:56:20 AM
Who pays for Bigfoot porn these days? It's all free on the internet.
 
2014-01-16 12:56:49 AM
Maybe I shouldn't.  People wearing clown shoes frighten me.
 
2014-01-16 01:00:26 AM
Out on the balcony, when Samsquanch kissed Diana's lips, her knees went weak. Slowly, he pulled her top down, exposing her soft, unyielding breasts. Just the sight of those breasts made Samsquanch's penis very hard. His penis was of considerable size, and now beads of sweat slowly ran down his penis, making it glisten like a strong swimmer, fresh from out of the pool. It was a fantastic penis, that seemed as strong as a horse's leg, yet as delicate as a flower wrapped in silk. What a grand, grand penis. Diana's nipples... Hmmm...
img.fark.net
Diana had never slept with another woman before, but it was an erotic thought she often fantasized about, and as Rebecca's naked body lay before her, Diana couldn't help but feel aroused. "Go on", Rebecca said softly, "Touch me." Diana leaned down slowly and brushed Rebecca's bare stomach with her fingertips... It felt good. Like a Samsquanch penis. A soft, but sturdy penis that felt warm to the touch. In Rebecca's mind, she suddenly felt like she was surrounded by Samsquanch penises. They were all around her, flopping all around and slapping her face. It was as if she were in a redwood forest of Samsquanch penises. They presented themselves tall and mighty all around her, with...
 
2014-01-16 01:00:39 AM

darwinpolice: miss diminutive: An erotic tale about a hairy man-ape who lives in the woods, rarely bathes and likely wipes its ass with leaves and bark? This can't be real....wait....

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

...nevermind

/personally haven't noticed a big foot = big package correlation
//anecdotally not a skank

I'll see your creepy but (mostly) human erotic novels and raise you... DINO-SMUT.

[pixel.nymag.com image 600x400]


Uh, wtf... Yea not knowing Might be good.
 
2014-01-16 01:08:39 AM
This is why if I were to hang around any gym, it would be the one where the basketball players are.

Seriously size 15? What does that translate to ...?
 
2014-01-16 01:09:09 AM
Came for samsquantch...


So, I wonder if there's ever been a study to determine if there actually is a readily visible body part that accurately reflects penis size.

I think I just discovered what I want to do when I grow up.
 
2014-01-16 01:12:04 AM

poison_amy: Came for samsquantch...


So, I wonder if there's ever been a study to determine if there actually is a readily visible body part that accurately reflects penis size.

I think I just discovered what I want to do when I grow up.


You're going on my favorites, in part because your profile is entertaining.
 
2014-01-16 01:14:37 AM
I'll see all your lame stuff and raise you a
 
2014-01-16 01:15:21 AM
Thanks for nuthin', Fark image bullsh*t

img.fark.net
 
2014-01-16 01:15:25 AM
My nephew said once, since he has large feet" You know what they say about men with big feet?
i said "Yea, they're slow".
 
2014-01-16 01:16:06 AM
I gotta get me some of that sweet niche erotica loot. How hard can it be to write what's essentially a 30 page erotic fan fiction about a mythical animal having it's way with a woman?
 
2014-01-16 01:16:50 AM
The raw smell of the skunk ape excited her in ways she did not think possible and she cooed softly as she petted the beast's matted fur.

After that it became...well.....NSFW anyway
 
2014-01-16 01:18:58 AM

Omahawg: The raw smell of the skunk ape excited her in ways she did not think possible and she cooed softly as she petted the beast's matted fur.

After that it became...well.....NSFW anyway


Go on...
 
2014-01-16 01:20:43 AM
nothing but small feet represented up in this thread.  When they needed a big foot print they called me, size 19.
 
2014-01-16 01:23:08 AM
Swamp Cabbage Man Erotica to 'drop' in a few days.
 
2014-01-16 01:23:56 AM

TinyFist: Hey guys, just got here... what's going on in this thread?

*skims*

Oh. Oh, okay....



*sigh*


If it were up to me, you would win the thread.
 
2014-01-16 01:27:39 AM
Unfortunately for me, I'm not quite 6'1 with a 10 and a half to 11 shoe size. But my arms and legs are super long.
 
2014-01-16 01:29:27 AM

tinfoil-hat maggie: Omahawg: The raw smell of the skunk ape excited her in ways she did not think possible and she cooed softly as she petted the beast's matted fur.

After that it became...well.....NSFW anyway

Go on...


I'll leave this for your imagination ;)

cartoonoveranalyzations.files.wordpress.com
 
2014-01-16 01:31:29 AM

tinfoil-hat maggie: darwinpolice: miss diminutive: An erotic tale about a hairy man-ape who lives in the woods, rarely bathes and likely wipes its ass with leaves and bark? This can't be real....wait....

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

[cdnl.complex.com image 620x400]

...nevermind

/personally haven't noticed a big foot = big package correlation
//anecdotally not a skank

I'll see your creepy but (mostly) human erotic novels and raise you... DINO-SMUT.

[pixel.nymag.com image 600x400]

Uh, wtf... Yea not knowing Might be good.


Over 200 titles in that author's section on Amazon.  Let that sink in.
 
2014-01-16 01:37:10 AM
size 10 1/2 shoes

if that means i am not big enough, i don't really want to throw my hotdog down that hallway anyway.
 
2014-01-16 01:42:32 AM

Omahawg: tinfoil-hat maggie: Omahawg: The raw smell of the skunk ape excited her in ways she did not think possible and she cooed softly as she petted the beast's matted fur.

After that it became...well.....NSFW anyway

Go on...

I'll leave this for your imagination ;)

[cartoonoveranalyzations.files.wordpress.com image 600x447]


Bugs Bunny gets violated by an amorous horse?
 
2014-01-16 01:47:16 AM

Theaetetus: AirForceVet: I heard it was the length of men's fingers, not foot size.

/With 11EE feet, I should, at least, be thicker.

Size 14, and I can reach a 12th on a piano with each hand (e.g. middle C to a high G). So... yeah.


I am intrigued by both of you. Please continue.
 
2014-01-16 01:49:12 AM

ladyfortuna: Omahawg: tinfoil-hat maggie: Omahawg: The raw smell of the skunk ape excited her in ways she did not think possible and she cooed softly as she petted the beast's matted fur.

After that it became...well.....NSFW anyway

Go on...

I'll leave this for your imagination ;)

[cartoonoveranalyzations.files.wordpress.com image 600x447]

Bugs Bunny gets violated by an amorous horse?


Oh, my Um , no borrowing a amorous horse probably wouldn't be a good Idea...
I'm already getting a reputation around here.
 
2014-01-16 01:52:13 AM

Gyrfalcon: Theaetetus: AirForceVet: I heard it was the length of men's fingers, not foot size.

/With 11EE feet, I should, at least, be thicker.

Size 14, and I can reach a 12th on a piano with each hand (e.g. middle C to a high G). So... yeah.

I am intrigued by both of you. Please continue.


Wait yiu mean I've been flirting with a size queen all this time?I'm hurt.
 
2014-01-16 01:54:24 AM

tinfoil-hat maggie: ladyfortuna: Omahawg: tinfoil-hat maggie: Omahawg: The raw smell of the skunk ape excited her in ways she did not think possible and she cooed softly as she petted the beast's matted fur.

After that it became...well.....NSFW anyway

Go on...

I'll leave this for your imagination ;)

[cartoonoveranalyzations.files.wordpress.com image 600x447]

Bugs Bunny gets violated by an amorous horse?

Oh, my Um , no borrowing a amorous horse probably wouldn't be a good Idea...
I'm already getting a reputation around here.


Your turn to go on...
 
2014-01-16 01:57:51 AM

Gyrfalcon: Theaetetus: AirForceVet: I heard it was the length of men's fingers, not foot size.

/With 11EE feet, I should, at least, be thicker.

Size 14, and I can reach a 12th on a piano with each hand (e.g. middle C to a high G). So... yeah.

I am intrigued by both of you. Please continue.


Oh, and sorry forr my drunk typos. I still love you/ and, well;
I will turn you into a true lib. I bet you're parents loved Reagan.
 
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