If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Gawker)   Man dies bobbing for an apple   (gawker.com) divider line 33
    More: Repeat, Chicago River  
•       •       •

5553 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jan 2014 at 4:05 AM (44 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



33 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest
 
2014-01-14 03:10:52 AM  
img.fark.net
 
2014-01-14 03:19:39 AM  
I liked it, subby
 
2014-01-14 04:10:34 AM  
I snorted
 
2014-01-14 04:14:16 AM  
How farking stupid can a person...er...three people be?  It's not like the phone's going to work even if they manage to recover it.

img.whenintime.com

2 out of 3.  Better than nothing.
 
2014-01-14 04:19:42 AM  
static3.wikia.nocookie.net
Approves.
 
2014-01-14 04:21:59 AM  
encrypted-tbn2.gstatic.com
 
2014-01-14 04:31:16 AM  
Bobbing for apples is for amateurs.

Now bobbing for french fries, that takes skill.

dnfta
 
2014-01-14 04:38:27 AM  
It's a phone. It was toast the second it hit the water. It's also the middle of winter. That water is freezing cold. So farking stupid. Their deaths were pointless and completely avoidable.
 
2014-01-14 04:40:58 AM  
And since this is Fark I dedicate Metallica's "Trapped Under Ice" to them.
 
2014-01-14 04:57:21 AM  

Swedgin: [img.fark.net image 500x360]


You have the most awesome fark handle ever.
 
2014-01-14 05:27:51 AM  
You never know what you can do until you are drunk try.

uploads.neatorama.com
 
2014-01-14 05:52:22 AM  

jtown: How farking stupid can a person...er...three people be?  It's not like the phone's going to work even if they manage to recover it.



2 out of 3.  Better than nothing.


Alot of new phones are waterproof.
 
2014-01-14 05:57:10 AM  

black__hippie: jtown: How farking stupid can a person...er...three people be?  It's not like the phone's going to work even if they manage to recover it.

2 out of 3.  Better than nothing.

Alot of new phones are waterproof.


There's 'waterproof', as in a quick splash into the bathtub or sink, and actually waterproof, which not a single phone is, Taking a prolonged dunk in a farking river?.....We're better off without this moron.
 
2014-01-14 06:24:10 AM  

black__hippie: jtown: How farking stupid can a person...er...three people be?  It's not like the phone's going to work even if they manage to recover it.

2 out of 3.  Better than nothing.

Alot of new phones are waterproof.



And 2 out of 3 humans weren't.
 
2014-01-14 06:41:16 AM  
Sounds more like a smartphone to me. No one would risk their life trying to save a cell phone.
 
2014-01-14 07:14:20 AM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: black__hippie: jtown: How farking stupid can a person...er...three people be?  It's not like the phone's going to work even if they manage to recover it.

2 out of 3.  Better than nothing.

Alot of new phones are waterproof.


And 2 out of 3 humans weren't.


The third one wasn't waterproof either, they're drying him out right now and seeing how much data was lost.
 
2014-01-14 07:27:21 AM  

lack of warmth: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: black__hippie: jtown: How farking stupid can a person...er...three people be?  It's not like the phone's going to work even if they manage to recover it.

2 out of 3.  Better than nothing.

Alot of new phones are waterproof.


And 2 out of 3 humans weren't.

The third one wasn't waterproof either, they're drying him out right now and seeing how much data was lost.


Go to the hospital.
See your friend.
Doctors have him packed in a giant ziplock bag full of rice.
 
2014-01-14 07:44:20 AM  
I laughed.
 
2014-01-14 07:47:33 AM  
Those phones sink like a stone too, so what are they going to do? Swim to the bottom of the river? I mean it has to be at least 20 feet down. Once it's over the edge and beyond your reach heading for the water... it's a lost cause.
 
2014-01-14 08:42:54 AM  

lack of warmth: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: black__hippie: jtown: How farking stupid can a person...er...three people be?  It's not like the phone's going to work even if they manage to recover it.

2 out of 3.  Better than nothing.

Alot of new phones are waterproof.


And 2 out of 3 humans weren't.

The third one wasn't waterproof either, they're drying him out right now and seeing how much data was lost.


ZINGER!
 
2014-01-14 09:02:12 AM  
Please don't let my last words be, "Wow, that was stupid. I really shouldn't have done that."
 
2014-01-14 09:51:13 AM  

Marmilman: Swedgin: [img.fark.net image 500x360]

You have the most awesome fark handle ever.


Hang dai.
 
2014-01-14 10:10:58 AM  

MechaPyx: It's a phone. It was toast the second it hit the water. It's also the middle of winter. That water is freezing cold. So farking stupid. Their deaths were pointless and completely avoidable.


But cool.
 
2014-01-14 10:22:24 AM  
Nice headline, Subs.  +1
 
2014-01-14 11:06:06 AM  
It makes me wonder how they got that far in their short lives in first place.

In all seriousness, I am saddened a bit to hear that two fellow human beings met their demise in such a stupid way,(with one in bad shape)  but at the same time I am laughing inside because it's hard to believe anyone from my generation would have risked their lives for losing a Game Boy into a freezing river.  There's no way TWO people would have jumped after me if I had done such a thing and was foolish enough to go after it, much less one person.

This story reads as a wake-up call for a new generation too easily felled by situations earlier generations would have snickered as they dropped the valued item: "Aww shiat! Fark!! Oh well...damn.." and get laughed at and that's it, not beget a pseudo tragedy.

The stupidity of it all prevents it from being a true tragedy.
 
2014-01-14 11:17:30 AM  
Some are saying that "he didn't jump into the river" because he slipped over the railing as he lunged for his cellular telephone then fell.

YEAH. That's why people are saying he "jumped" because only a moron would go beyond a railing meant to safeguard your life for a personal item out of a freezing cold river which may as well have been hot lava.

The dipshiat lunged so much that he may as well have jumped because that's what the physical affect was, dummies.

Hey twentysomethings: freezing cold bodies of water will kill your ass. Your welcome.
 
2014-01-14 11:18:18 AM  
*you're

damnit all
 
2014-01-14 11:43:42 AM  

doglover: lack of warmth: Abe Vigoda's Ghost: black__hippie: jtown: How farking stupid can a person...er...three people be?  It's not like the phone's going to work even if they manage to recover it.

2 out of 3.  Better than nothing.

Alot of new phones are waterproof.


And 2 out of 3 humans weren't.

The third one wasn't waterproof either, they're drying him out right now and seeing how much data was lost.

Go to the hospital.
See your friend.
Doctors have him packed in a giant ziplock bag full of rice.


LOL.
 
2014-01-14 12:16:58 PM  
old.daps.tv

Keys Phone... Lava Frozen River...
 
2014-01-14 12:35:59 PM  
...Retracted... Not due to the errors but due to the previous posting of this same story referencing said joke.
 
2014-01-14 12:37:52 PM  
Did any rocket scientists mention this was dumb because the phone wouldn't work anyway?

"Police in Chicago say a Minnesota man was pronounced dead after attempting to retrieve his cellphone from the iced-over waters of the Chicago River"

I'm not arguing a high level of intelligence for the would-be phone retrievers, but I wouldn't put the dead in a category any lower than say for instance.....adults with the reading comprehension of a 6-year-old.  Like to think they just didn't RTFA....
 
2014-01-14 03:02:11 PM  

walktoanarcade: It makes me wonder how they got that far in their short lives in first place.

In all seriousness, I am saddened a bit to hear that two fellow human beings met their demise in such a stupid way,(with one in bad shape)  but at the same time I am laughing inside because it's hard to believe anyone from my generation would have risked their lives for losing a Game Boy into a freezing river.  There's no way TWO people would have jumped after me if I had done such a thing and was foolish enough to go after it, much less one person.

This story reads as a wake-up call for a new generation too easily felled by situations earlier generations would have snickered as they dropped the valued item: "Aww shiat! Fark!! Oh well...damn.." and get laughed at and that's it, not beget a pseudo tragedy.

The stupidity of it all prevents it from being a true tragedy.



Neat theory, how does it hold up to this 69 year old walking into a helicopter rotor to catch his hat?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/30/carl-enlow-pilot_n_4016342. ht ml
 
2014-01-14 04:33:50 PM  

minuslars: walktoanarcade: It makes me wonder how they got that far in their short lives in first place.

In all seriousness, I am saddened a bit to hear that two fellow human beings met their demise in such a stupid way,(with one in bad shape)  but at the same time I am laughing inside because it's hard to believe anyone from my generation would have risked their lives for losing a Game Boy into a freezing river.  There's no way TWO people would have jumped after me if I had done such a thing and was foolish enough to go after it, much less one person.

This story reads as a wake-up call for a new generation too easily felled by situations earlier generations would have snickered as they dropped the valued item: "Aww shiat! Fark!! Oh well...damn.." and get laughed at and that's it, not beget a pseudo tragedy.

The stupidity of it all prevents it from being a true tragedy.


Neat theory, how does it hold up to this 69 year old walking into a helicopter rotor to catch his hat?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/30/carl-enlow-pilot_n_4016342. ht ml


On the one end you have youthful stupidity and on the other you have creeping senility.
 
Displayed 33 of 33 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report