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(Washington Times)   Bringing more than 20 items may cause a vicious old man fight to break out in the Walmart express lane   (washingtontimes.com) divider line 79
    More: Florida, express lanes, Terry McAuliffe  
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5313 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Jan 2014 at 4:11 AM (28 weeks ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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x23
2014-01-14 10:04:05 AM

tbhouston: I wonder how many speed limit breakers we have in this thread championing the 20 item rule ...


i wonder what the point of that inanely stupid comparison could possibly be...
 
2014-01-14 10:14:48 AM
i remember counting some lady's items out loud once....she got pissed off and told me to stop.

Haha. Good times.
 
2014-01-14 10:31:11 AM
My favorite is when I have a full cart, and am in a regular line, with the express line open.  The cashier will wave me over, and invariably, a huge line immediately forms.  I used to try and explain that I wasn't a douche, then I just stopped worrying about it.
 
2014-01-14 10:35:04 AM

Esroc: Excessive, but still. Fark those people. The other day I tried to buy a single tube of toothpase and the lady at the 20 items or less isle had a cart full, a check book, AND broke up the items into three groups with three separate checks for some damn reason.
Sometimes I wish I could get into the heads of these people and try to understand their thought process.


When stuff like this happens to me, I stand there and read every gossip rag in sight, then space out and smile at the offender until they get uncomfortable, since they know I should be seething. By the time they finally check out, they're so rattled they forget their checkbook.

Of course, I'm usually blazed when I do this. It's the only way I can deal with going out in public.

LittleSmitty: At my local Walmart, the express lane is almost always worked by the most ancient person in the store. Express lane my ass. The woman is so slow you can go through the regular checkout behind an elderly cat lady with 100 cans of cat food and a checkbook she doesn't bother to drag out until every can is wrung up, and still get out before the guy buying a pack of Camels in the express lane.
/hooray run on sentences


There's a gal at our Wal-Mart who is disabled somehow, and she is very, very slow. You can just see everyone in line standing there, then watching her, then getting more and more peeved. They only put her on the express lane, but she is just very slow. Has trouble with her hands, talking, putting things in the bags. I know it's her and I go to her line deliberately, just because. Because if that gal gets fired from Wal-Mart, she'll never get a job again. I can't even get a job in this town.
 
2014-01-14 10:38:57 AM

cryinoutloud: Esroc: Excessive, but still. Fark those people. The other day I tried to buy a single tube of toothpase and the lady at the 20 items or less isle had a cart full, a check book, AND broke up the items into three groups with three separate checks for some damn reason.
Sometimes I wish I could get into the heads of these people and try to understand their thought process.

When stuff like this happens to me, I stand there and read every gossip rag in sight, then space out and smile at the offender until they get uncomfortable, since they know I should be seething. By the time they finally check out, they're so rattled they forget their checkbook.

Of course, I'm usually blazed when I do this. It's the only way I can deal with going out in public.

LittleSmitty: At my local Walmart, the express lane is almost always worked by the most ancient person in the store. Express lane my ass. The woman is so slow you can go through the regular checkout behind an elderly cat lady with 100 cans of cat food and a checkbook she doesn't bother to drag out until every can is wrung up, and still get out before the guy buying a pack of Camels in the express lane.
/hooray run on sentences

There's a gal at our Wal-Mart who is disabled somehow, and she is very, very slow. You can just see everyone in line standing there, then watching her, then getting more and more peeved. They only put her on the express lane, but she is just very slow. Has trouble with her hands, talking, putting things in the bags. I know it's her and I go to her line deliberately, just because. Because if that gal gets fired from Wal-Mart, she'll never get a job again. I can't even get a job in this town.


Causation or correlation?
 
2014-01-14 10:59:42 AM
the express line is the fastest not always

blogs.riverfronttimes.com
 
2014-01-14 11:01:46 AM
I think being in the "X items or fewer" lane with more than "X" number of items should be a misdemeanor crime. We should be able to call the cops on assholes who do this. Seriously-- F♥ck you, you ignorant, rude, f♥cktards who do this. I'm standing there juggling a gallon of milk and a case of Coke, with things to do, and you're casually unloading 40 items and scanning them as ineptly as possible?! BITE ME.

For that matter, it should be a crime for anyone who can't operate their DVD player to attempt to operate a U-Scan checkout. Seriously, if you can't figure it out, then STEP ASIDE, DUMB-ASS.

Of course, it would help if Walmart had U-Scans that actually worked properly and didn't freak out when a breeze blows across the scales, causing it to seize up and whine "Unexpected item in bagging area" when you didn't put anything  in  the goddamned bagging area.
 
2014-01-14 11:10:47 AM

ZeroCorpse: I think being in the "X items or fewer" lane with more than "X" number of items should be a misdemeanor crime. We should be able to call the cops on assholes who do this. Seriously-- F♥ck you, you ignorant, rude, f♥cktards who do this. I'm standing there juggling a gallon of milk and a case of Coke, with things to do, and you're casually unloading 40 items and scanning them as ineptly as possible?! BITE ME.

For that matter, it should be a crime for anyone who can't operate their DVD player to attempt to operate a U-Scan checkout. Seriously, if you can't figure it out, then STEP ASIDE, DUMB-ASS.

Of course, it would help if Walmart had U-Scans that actually worked properly and didn't freak out when a breeze blows across the scales, causing it to seize up and whine "Unexpected item in bagging area" when you didn't put anything  in  the goddamned bagging area.


I too felt a similar white-hot rage when shopping.  The local Giant got guns that allow me to scan all of my items and bag them, spend 2 mintues at a self-checkout scanner paying for the items, and GTF out of the store.  I don't have to deal with any of the horror stories related above.
 
2014-01-14 11:27:43 AM

x23: MythDragon: MythDragon's rules for the express lane.

You are allowed to go 20% over the limit without incruing any face punches.

For example if the limit is 10 items you may have 12.
If it's 20, you may have 14.

that seems like a pretty stupid rule. i'll stick with the full 20. thanks.


I can't math. Ment 24.
 
2014-01-14 11:36:31 AM

MycroftHolmes: Causation or correlation?


Do you take everyone's posts entirely literally? Because if you do, you're probably on the wrong website. At least, you'll never have a good time. But maybe that's your thing.
 
2014-01-14 11:37:34 AM
Oh now I see you're from Texas. That explains it.
 
2014-01-14 11:52:44 AM

cryinoutloud: Oh now I see you're from Texas. That explains it.


wow, that escalated quickly.  I thought pot heads were supposed to be mellow and not so thin skinned.

Sorry, I didn't mean to tease you so much that you got your feelings hurt.  Go back to your couch, eat some cheeto's and it will be ok.
 
2014-01-14 12:11:46 PM

MythDragon: MythDragon's rules for the express lane.


These should be posted at every checkout!

lingua: I would be OK with surcharges for excess items. Specifically, surcharges that grow exponentially.

Say it's a 15-item lane -- the 16th item might ring up for an extra dime. The 17th for an extra 20 cents. The 18th for 40. And so on and so on.

Then a slight miscalculation about how many items you have or an impulsive Kit Kat that puts you over 15 gets punished, but not severely. However, showing up in the express lane with a full cart will let them remodel the store.


I like that. It would solve the problem quickly without pointing fingers.
 
2014-01-14 12:44:32 PM
Maybe not news for some, but saw a self-checkout at a CVS in Boston at the start of this year that made me weep tears of joy.

Walmart may be awful, but waiting ten minutes in line at a pharmacy makes me sad.
 
2014-01-14 12:44:57 PM

LemSkroob: zepillin: Are they not the same by tally?

You count the number of scans that have to be made.

The beer is one scan. The cans are individual scans. What is important is the time it takes to ring someone up.


Only if the cashier is incompetent, mindless  or untrained or if the customer is lazy and just throws the groceries up helter skelter. They they should only have to scan one item to ring four as in 4@scan hence same by tally and all four beers can be moved in one motion using two hands.

The time difference is milliseconds and milliseconds are not important.
 
2014-01-14 01:13:05 PM

Radioactive Ass: [old men voices]
OM#1: Hey. That's 21 items! the sign says 20 or less!
OM#2: There's 2 cans of creamed corn in there. That counts as 1 item because they are 2 for 1 today.
OM#1: No it doesn't! It says 20 ITEMS! 2 cans are 2 ITEMS!
OM#2: STFU and go fark your wifes dusty vagoo before it withers away!
[/old men voices]


I read that in my voice.

Hey . . . . . !
 
2014-01-14 01:24:40 PM
I rarely go to Walmart but when I do, it's usually late at night.  On most of my visits, the express lane is either the only lane open or 1 of 2 lanes open.  At this particular Walmart, they shut down the self checkout lanes around 10pm.  This means there really isn't an express lane even though the sign says otherwise.  You end up waiting in line for 20 minutes contemplating the decisions in your life that led you to this moment.

/live about 5 minutes away from a Walmart
//avoid the place as much as possible
 
2014-01-14 01:34:28 PM
If cashiers were allowed to ENFORCE the limit it'd be fine.

But we live in a nation of "Do not offend the customer at ANY cost," and people now know that. The people who break the item limit rule know that nobody's gonna say a thing, so they do it intentionally.
 
2014-01-14 01:53:44 PM
It's Walmart people, and in Florida!

A Terrible Human


I can understand the rage. You ever get in the 20 items or less line to buy a pack of cigarettes only to have people with 2 carts full of crap in front of you,you calmly wait until you can take no more after a woman argues with the cashier about marbolo lights being $20 off at speedway then you just set your shiat down and walk out.

I buy Skydancer smokes from a convenience store at $35 a carton. Native American produced. I used to smoke Basic, a previously generic Big Tobacco brand until they went up to $50 a carton.

Walmart has this big advertisement about matching prices and all that, which they have bragged about for years. Just point out, with a receipt, that you bought the item cheaper elsewhere and they'll match the price. Except for tobacco products. Back before everyone went totally insane on smoking, I brought in a receipt showing I bought brand name smokes cheaper elsewhere and Walmart refused to lower its charge for the same type, informing me they bought from a different wholesaler.

So, they don't follow their own guarantee. Even back then before all of this second hand smoke stuff came out and they started banning folks from smoking even on the streets.

BTW. Florida is all f**ked up because you buggers in the northern states sent all of your psychopaths down here to us, probably hoping they'd get eaten by the gators. So now we're stuck with a higher population of 'insane suckage' than the rest of the US. Thanks a lot.
 
2014-01-14 02:07:40 PM

mrEdude: i remember counting some lady's items out loud once....she got pissed off and told me to stop.

Haha. Good times.


I still do that, it's hilarious!
 
2014-01-14 02:58:03 PM
You know, if we kill *one* person for doing this as an example, we never have to suffer it again.

For the good of all, let's try it.
 
2014-01-14 03:50:55 PM
Yes, I counted each item this old lady removed from her cart yesterday to put on the counter in the Express Lane. She barely escaped a whooping by three items.

/had 17
//I had 2
 
2014-01-14 03:54:54 PM
"When deputies arrived Malherbe was shaking and was upset, and his elbow was slightly red."


Felony battery charges for hitting the douche with a shopping cart and all that was visible is a 'SLIGHTLY RED ELBOW'??

WTF?
 
2014-01-14 05:22:26 PM

starlost: my peev is when a family owned little store has the cashier also answering the phone. the phone rings and the cashier pays more attention to the caller asking about a item then they do to the customer that is in the store with money in hand and their items ready to be checked out. put the damn caller on hold immediately and wait on us who are already in the store. come to think of it the chain stores for auto parts can be the worse for having the phone always ringing and the part's guys walking away to look for something for the caller instead of finishing waiting on us.


More than likely, the guy on the phone is a wholesale customer who spends thousands a month.  As an auto parts store manager, I can assure you, they come first, the rest of you are first come, first serve regardless of being on the phone or in front of me.
 
2014-01-14 05:34:29 PM
dilbert.com
 
2014-01-14 06:08:21 PM
I was in line once.  The person two people ahead of me was near or over the maximum number of items, looking ahead.  The guy right in front of me was looking intensely at her cart, mouthing the different products as he counted.  We he realized he'd caught her going over the limit, he turned to me and loudly and passive-aggressively said, 'Don't you hate people who don't count how many items they have before going through the express lane?'

I responded, 'Not as much as I hate busybodies who look through other people's shopping carts.'
 
2014-01-14 09:21:13 PM
Solution: Rig up the brightest light possible to shine directly down on the person when the first item over the limit is scanned. It would be just like 2 people in an elevator and one farts silently. Everybody would know who did it.
 
2014-01-14 09:54:48 PM

Taxee: Solution: Rig up the brightest light possible to shine directly down on the person when the first item over the limit is scanned. It would be just like 2 people in an elevator and one farts silently. Everybody would know who did it.


Have a big red number over their head increment as each item is scanned.  They'd get the idea and leave.
 
2014-01-14 10:08:22 PM
Mr Golladay deserves a hero tag.  It is a shame that Walmart escorted him out rather than the "victim".  The douchebags who pretend that they cant count to 20 or 15 or 10 or whatever it is at the local store deserve a serious beating. They need to follow the damn rules rather than being a bunch of self-centered twats.  If I were king one of the things I would do is immediately institute a policy of a 1 year minimum mandatory prison sentence for folks who try to get through an express line with more than the maximum allowed number of items.
 
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