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(Popular Science)   A team of biologists found that women spend more time looking at naked men if they have larger penises   (popsci.com) divider line 196
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2014-01-13 03:03:22 PM

redflag: wxboy: Women who have large penises and spend time looking at naked men are actually gay crossdressing men.  FYI.

Uh oh, someone never learned that a pronoun refers to the last relevant noun used.  While not a great sentence, subby is still technically correct in his/her/its usage of "they"

/the best kind of correct!


My dangling modifier is huge. Women stare at it.
 
2014-01-13 03:03:59 PM

lordjupiter: Ladies, my eyes are up HERE.


But your penis is down here, and that's what I want to look at.
 
2014-01-13 03:03:59 PM

miss diminutive: Attention Whore of Babylon: Well, sure I'd spend more time looking at a picture of guy with a larger penis.  Though my though process would probably entail something like, "Is that real?" and "Ow."  Not really the sort of thing most men assume I'd be thinking about.

This. If they're on the large size of the spectrum most of my staring is a result of trying to do quick math in my head, wondering where it'll fit.


Don't worry......we can make it fit anywhere.
 
2014-01-13 03:03:59 PM
Where are the pics of said penises?
 
2014-01-13 03:04:39 PM

miss diminutive: Seeing as how often I have the opportunity to stare at groups of naked men and compare them against each other is pretty remote, I find the results of the study pretty meaningless.


Kinda what I was thinking, miss d.  They tried to kinda "focus group" this study, like it was going to influence the design of some new car or something.


So here's a more practical question, Farkettes:

In my experience, and I assume in that many other (straight) men, there is that moment of apprehension, where you're about to see the clothes come off, and you're just not sure what to expect.

Is this true with gals?

I don't make a vagina to penis comparison here, because frankly, vaginas are all quite different, and it takes some REALLY weird looking lady-parts to make a difference.

Bras do more to lend to this mystery than boxers.  There's a special kind of disappointment when you find out the bra contained breasts that are really, sadly unattractive.

But ladies, it boils down to this: At that moment, are you more apt to be thinking

A) Gee I hope its not small.
B)Gee I hope its not huge.
C) other
 
2014-01-13 03:05:00 PM
Obvious tag on vacation?
 
2014-01-13 03:05:09 PM

miss diminutive: Attention Whore of Babylon: Well, sure I'd spend more time looking at a picture of guy with a larger penis.  Though my though process would probably entail something like, "Is that real?" and "Ow."  Not really the sort of thing most men assume I'd be thinking about.

This. If they're on the large size of the spectrum most of my staring is a result of trying to do quick math in my head, wondering where it'll fit.


global3.memecdn.com


Abe Vigoda's Ghost: A team of biologists found that women spend more time looking at naked men if they have larger penises

She's watching you. NSFW


(checks UR) oh hell no
 
2014-01-13 03:05:16 PM
Nah it's all about that dude with two dicks now.
 
2014-01-13 03:05:35 PM

letrole: A man who takes comfort in believing size doesn't matter also tends to:

1. Own a TV but haven't turned it on in years
2. Drink microbrewery beer
3. Watch Japanese children's cartoons on a Mac
4. Appreciate the warmth of vinyl phonograph records
5. Read books at Starbucks
6. Claim to prefer girls with small breasts
7. Make snide remarks about Wal-Mart.
8. Walk past a smoker and force pretentious coughing noises
9. Ride a bike wearing spandex stretch trousers
10. Feign disgust at the idea of eating a Big Mac


Size matters for looks. It does not matter for quality of sex. If you want to woman to keep having sex with you, understand what causes a female orgasm and make sure she gets at least one every time you have sex. Hint: A gargantuan Mr. Winky does not give a woman an orgasm.

Also, we like to look at nice asses, too.
 
2014-01-13 03:05:44 PM
 
2014-01-13 03:06:01 PM

quickdraw: here to help: While we spend more time looking at women with smaller vaginas.

Tuck in those curtains, ladies.

You do know its not labia size that determines the tightness of vaginal contractions right?

/oh nevermind


I just knew somebody would have to throw in some Benghazi reference.
 
2014-01-13 03:06:59 PM
Hey I know!

All us male farkers send WIE to a farkette she can rate them all and then get back to us on who's is the largest and which one she finds most aesthetically pleasing.

Any farkettes up for the task?

\its for science
 
2014-01-13 03:07:08 PM

JackieRabbit: Inasmuch as women don't usually see the package until they have decided they want the guy, this study has no validity.


I think you're right on the money with that idea. However, there is something to be said about aesthetics in the way we are attracted to the human form - and to that - we each prefer our own cup of tea. Therefore, any ladies out there lucky enough to sample mine will have to bring quite a nice tea cozy to keep things hot.

Two sides to everything ya know.
 
2014-01-13 03:07:10 PM

EdgeRunner: Are they looking at them by choice? Or are over-endowed men just more confident about sending naked selfies to random coworkers, so they're looked at more because they're more common?

/anyway, everyone knows it's not size that really counts, but presentation. Show a woman a nude pic, she might give it a glance or two. Grind your naked body against her car windshield while she's trying to pull out of the parking garage, she won't be able to stop staring.


I park on the nw corner of lot 2. Be there.
 
2014-01-13 03:07:52 PM
images.dangerousminds.net
 
2014-01-13 03:08:40 PM
Speaking as someone who is five foot two: No. No, I really don't think so. You can't fit a semi truck in a single car garage. I know some women will disagree with me, of course, but I'll pass on Thunder the Wonder Horse.
 
2014-01-13 03:08:40 PM

here to help: While we spend more time looking at women with smaller vaginas.

Tuck in those curtains, ladies.



Speak for yourself.

I like my pussy exotic and my homosexuals FLAMING.
 
2014-01-13 03:08:43 PM
Shouldn't the plural be "penes?"
 
2014-01-13 03:08:44 PM

here to help: letrole: A man who takes comfort in believing size doesn't matter also tends to:

1. Own a TV but haven't turned it on in years
2. Drink microbrewery beer
3. Watch Japanese children's cartoons on a Mac
4. Appreciate the warmth of vinyl phonograph records
5. Read books at Starbucks
6. Claim to prefer girls with small breasts
7. Make snide remarks about Wal-Mart.
8. Walk past a smoker and force pretentious coughing noises
9. Ride a bike wearing spandex stretch trousers
10. Feign disgust at the idea of eating a Big Mac

Well at least your keyboard doesn't have the "atheism is a religion" key stuck anymore.


I think the key sequence is "CTRL+A+R".
 
2014-01-13 03:08:45 PM

kvinesknows: Hey I know!

All us male farkers send WIE to a farkette she can rate them all and then get back to us on who's is the largest and which one she finds most aesthetically pleasing.

Any farkettes up for the task?

\its for science


It's like this thread was made just for me...
 
2014-01-13 03:09:13 PM

kvinesknows: Hey I know!

All us male farkers send WIE to a farkette she can rate them all and then get back to us on who's is the largest and which one she finds most aesthetically pleasing.

Any farkettes up for the task?

\its for science


I'm in. I'll be 18 next month so I'm sure it's cool. I'll share them with my friends and we'll send some pics back.
 
2014-01-13 03:09:20 PM

miss diminutive: Seeing as how often I have the opportunity to stare at groups of naked men and compare them against each other is pretty remote, I find the results of the study pretty meaningless.


Remember, you're on Fark.  All you need to do to see all the naked men you could handle is ask and behold the destruction of your inbox.

/your email inbox that is...
 
2014-01-13 03:09:23 PM

JoieD'Zen: Where are the pics of said penises?


EIP
 
2014-01-13 03:10:16 PM
This thread is worthless without pics.
 
2014-01-13 03:10:31 PM

AverageAmericanGuy: Pocket Ninja: Yeah, but they're mocking looks. They're thinking to themselves, "Oh, jesus, look at this guy with his big dick, he probably thinks he's something special. Ha, fat chance. Oooh, there's a four-incher over there, I bet he's got some mad skills."

Keep telling yourself that, Tiny.


"Why didn't my fark name end up as above-average American guy?"

: )
 
2014-01-13 03:11:10 PM
Off to buy a couple of big ole magnifying lenses and a belt to lash them to...
 
2014-01-13 03:12:16 PM

gingerjet: This thread is worthless without pics.


wdfw.wa.gov
 
2014-01-13 03:12:50 PM
And is it just me or does it seem like we have a drunk/perverted admin gone rogue today?

Drew? Is that you?
 
2014-01-13 03:13:34 PM
At least they published in the right journal

www.pnas.org
 
2014-01-13 03:13:42 PM

here to help: letrole: A man who takes comfort in believing size doesn't matter also tends to:

1. Own a TV but haven't turned it on in years
2. Drink microbrewery beer
3. Watch Japanese children's cartoons on a Mac
4. Appreciate the warmth of vinyl phonograph records
5. Read books at Starbucks
6. Claim to prefer girls with small breasts
7. Make snide remarks about Wal-Mart.
8. Walk past a smoker and force pretentious coughing noises
9. Ride a bike wearing spandex stretch trousers
10. Feign disgust at the idea of eating a Big Mac

Well at least your keyboard doesn't have the "atheism is a religion" key stuck anymore.


Yeah but he has this list on a copy-pasta somewhere because i've seen it before.
 
2014-01-13 03:13:47 PM

here to help: While we spend more time looking at women with smaller vaginas.

Tuck in those curtains, ladies.


To each their own, but as someone who works in an adult entertainment related field, I would say this is wildly incorrect. Of course, that's based purely on anecdotal evidence, so who knows.

I mean you can get into some definite wizard sleeve territory on rare occasions, but just saying, my experience that "plump" or "meaty" lips are rarely considered a bad thing.

Btw, "curtains" would refer to labia, not vagina. And if you think the appearance of labia is related to vaginal tightness, I'm gonna stop talking because I'm probably just wasting my breath.
 
2014-01-13 03:14:00 PM

SurfaceTension: No wonder I can't get a woman to even look my way.


Testify!
 
2014-01-13 03:14:12 PM

calbert: Apr 8 2013

pretty sure this is a repeat, but I don't have time to look now


What if it had a really big schlong? would you look then?
 
2014-01-13 03:14:13 PM
A joke photograph made it's rounds around my workers cell phones a week ago.  It showed a well endowed man. Most of the reactions from the women were, "Nope!"
 
2014-01-13 03:14:59 PM

Ringshadow: Speaking as someone who is five foot two: No. No, I really don't think so. You can't fit a semi truck in a single car garage. I know some women will disagree with me, of course, but I'll pass on Thunder the Wonder Horse.


Finally, I have a name for my penis!
 
2014-01-13 03:16:15 PM
Hoping I can be saved by the shoulder-hip ratio, but I don't know what's a good one.
 
2014-01-13 03:16:25 PM
media.monstersandcritics.com
 
2014-01-13 03:16:38 PM

gingerjet: This thread is worthless without pics.


Can be remedied...
 
2014-01-13 03:18:02 PM
i44.tinypic.com

Dude has a huge tool.
 
2014-01-13 03:18:09 PM

letrole: A man who takes comfort in believing size doesn't matter also tends to:

1. Own a TV but haven't turned it on in years- watch it plenty
2. Drink microbrewery beer- prefer it over mainstream swill but prefer beer over about anything else
3. Watch Japanese children's cartoons on a Mac  - i guess IF I watched japanese or children's cartoons it would be on my MAC
4. Appreciate the warmth of vinyl phonograph records  - my ears are shot from listening to motorhead in my youth so I can't tell the difference
5. Read books at Starbucks  - like books, can't stand coffee.
6. Claim to prefer girls with small breasts  - i actually do but it's because the larger ones get all saggy when they get close to my age...and some of them way earlier
7. Make snide remarks about Wal-Mart.- prefer not to shop there but, i've done it.
8. Walk past a smoker and force pretentious coughing noises  - only if i really have to cough.
9. Ride a bike wearing spandex stretch trousers  - if i owned any I probably would on a long ride. Instead it is basketball or running shorts.
10. Feign disgust at the idea of eating a Big Mac  - I'd rather have a qtr pounder but a big mac is ok...take out that extra piece of bread.


So, do I care about size or not...I don't know but I've got to be at the gym in 26 minutes...got to go start my 1987 Chevette. Later!
 
2014-01-13 03:19:05 PM

here to help: While we spend more time looking at women with smaller vaginas.

Tuck in those curtains, ladies.


Ain't nothing wrong with curtains and drapes.
 
2014-01-13 03:19:09 PM
Midrissa: as someone who works in an adult entertainment related field

How YOU doin?
 
2014-01-13 03:19:13 PM

23FPB23: But ladies, it boils down to this: At that moment, are you more apt to be thinking

A) Gee I hope its not small.
B)Gee I hope its not huge.
C) other


There's a bit of A and B happening, but it's not really all that important. Unless he's below the 10th or above the 90th percentile in terms of size, it will be fine. Honestly, for me, there's a lot more C.

C) being "Gee I hope he's kept his junk clean and reasonably groomed."
 
2014-01-13 03:21:17 PM
It's twue, it's twue.
 
2014-01-13 03:21:52 PM

Pocket Ninja: Yeah, but they're mocking looks. They're thinking to themselves, "Oh, jesus, look at this guy with his big dick, he probably thinks he's something special. Ha, fat chance. Oooh, there's a four-incher over there, I bet he's got some mad skills."


Everybody can stick a tiny carrot into a semi-aroused vagina. But if you sport heavy equipment you better polish up your foreplay skills if you're not into earning your red wings even outside of her period (or having her leave the room sobbing the moment the boxers fall).
 
2014-01-13 03:21:56 PM
I didn't know women have penises, let along longer penises.
 
2014-01-13 03:22:41 PM

Wasilla Hillbilly: It matters to some. It doesn't have to matter to you. Enjoy what you have and others will too.


Wisdom beyond your years.
It's all about comfort with your own body -- both of you.

(...and not being pushy.)
 
2014-01-13 03:23:39 PM

gingerjet: This thread is worthless without pics.


i100.photobucket.com
 
2014-01-13 03:24:28 PM
Stop staring at me.
 
2014-01-13 03:25:09 PM

mayIFark: I didn't know women have penises, let along longer penises.


Some do. And it is glorious.
 
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